BELLA P.O.V

I walked faster and instead of taking the elevator I ran down the stairs. I'm amazed I didn't fall to be honest. I burst through the door into the outside courtyard and jogged. I didn't know where I was going but I ended up sitting on a bench amongst beautiful flowers.

'Bella,' someone shouted nearby. I looked up and I felt my eyes widen in surprise. Edward had followed me out here. I felt overjoyed and worried at the same time. 'Bella.'

I sat there stunned as he jogged over to me. When he reached me he sat on the chair breathing slightly heavy. 'What are you…'

'Dam Bella you run fast,' he commented turning to me. 'What was that?'

'I told you I, I just need to think,' I mumbled putting my head in my hands. 'This is too much.'

I felt a hand on the small of my back and I felt tears well up. 'Bella, you know you can talk too me,' Edward said. 'I understand what ever it is that has happened, must have been horrible, and I can understand if you don't want to talk about it. It is your choice.'

I sniffed and listened to his voice, it was soothing me, he was soothing me without even trying.

'You know I missed talking to you.'

I couldn't agree more, I thought.

'I have wanted to talk to someone for a long time actually, but I found the only person I could truly talk to was you,' he sighed and ran his hand through his messy hair. 'You know that day I left the orphanage I have never felt the same, I could never talk to people like I could to you Bella. When I saw you again for the first time in 7 years I was ecstatic I thought I would never see you again. I've always felt the only person that understood me was you, so I have learned to keep most things in.'

Sounds familiar, I thought sarcastically.

'But I don't want to anymore Bella, I want to talk, so if you don't want to talk about whatever it is that happened to you, I will go ahead.'

When I didn't answer and silence crept over us he sighed and began. 'It's about Tanya mostly, I feel distant from her, and I think she likes someone else.'

Woah, unexpected. I looked up to see him, looking at the flowers in front of us.

'To be honest I don't really care I mean I love her and all but I'm not in love with her, well I don't know if I am or not, you know. We only just started going out near the end of high school, I only agreed because she was the only girl besides Rosalie, Alice, Katie and Keira with half a brain. And I am pretty sure she only went out with me to be noticed or maybe to be more included in our family. I don't know. I will admit it is kinda more of a physical relationship.'

My heart jumped slightly at this and it hurt, why did he have to tell me that. If only he knew that this was killing me, to listen to his and Tanya's relationship, a relationship I wish I was in with him.

'But I am sick of it just being kissing and everything, I want to be able to talk to her like I do with you but I just can't,' I grounded out in frustration. 'Our opinions are completely different and it is annoying sometimes, she can be so, so…'

'Pushy?' I asked.

'Yeah, pushy and it bugs the hell out of me.'

I felt a bit happy by this, she annoys him, maybe they won't be together for that long. Maybe Joe will get Tanya and I will get Edward. How good would that be, then everyone could be happy. But that's brings me back to my first worry. If I couldn't talk to Edward like I could back when we were in the orphanage what would make me any different to Tanya. And why couldn't I talk to Edward, I should know he wont judge or leave me. But he has left me before, not by choice I will admit, but he did go. What am I saying, I argued with myself. This is Edward the guy I used to pour my heart and soul out to with no second thought, my best friend, my first true love, the first person I let in and trusted, and here I am thinking the worst of him. Oblivious to my eternal battle Edward sat in silence twisting a flower in his hand. I watched him intently, should I or shouldn't I, should I or shouldn't I.

'Jacob,' I finally managed to croak out not even above a whisper. Edward turned and stared at me confused.

'What?'

'The guy, who sent the email,' I said slowly. 'His name is Jacob.'

I saw him stop twisting the flower and turn towards me staring me directly in the eyes. 'What happened, Bella?'

I took in some shaky breaths and closed my eyes, reliving these memories were painful.

'H-He was one of my foster families son, he was really creepy, and my age. Y-You got to understand Edward after you left, bad things happened,' I murmured and looked at my lap again.

'Bella,' he said and lifted my chin to face him again. 'What bad things?'

My mouth dried up but I couldn't break his intense gaze. 'W-Well before everything that happened with Jacob,' I winced when I said his name. 'There were are few other incidents, no one knew about them I was to scared, after you guys left Edward, I shut down, turned myself numb. The pain was unbearable and I felt so broken.'

'Bella stop trying to avoid the question, what happened,' he whispered still holding my face up. I was dodging the subject subconsciously it felt so different to talk about it after keeping it locked away for so long.

'When I started going to foster homes there were a few families that didn't want me there, in one family they, they h-hit me, like I was some doll. I have never been so scared in my life and knowing you were gone and I couldn't say anything made it even worse.'

I took a deep breath and continued 'But there was one time worse then others at this family called the Blacks. They were nice, nicer then other parents that took me in. At first so was Jacob but then, then he started watching me like I was on display, they way he looked made me feel…uncomfortable, like he was stripping off my clothes with his eyes. I tried to avoid him as much as I could never being in the same room as him, always making sure other people were around but one afternoon a couple of days before I was supposed to leave, he took it another step.'

I began to cry remembering the dream of the night 'He, he came out of no where and flung me onto the couch, he kept saying I was beautiful and that I was his. I tried I really did, to get him off but h-he was to strong. Before I knew it my clothes were gone and he was on top of me kissing me, touching me,' I shivered, wiping away tears. 'All I could do was cry and beg for him to stop but it didn't work. H-he raped me Edward, with no regret. He did it again, and again, and again, when ever he could until I left. That's why I left Edward, I couldn't he would come for me, I knew he would. He promised me when I left we would see each other again, I panicked and picked up my stuff and ran away, getting out my money. Know one knew where I went besides Angela, my friend from there, and now, now he has he phone, he is going to find me, I know he will, and he will take me back, and r-rape me again, I can't, I just can't go through that again, I-'

Edward cut me off in my hysterical rant and pulled me into him. 'Shh, Bella, Shh. We won't let that happen, and I can promise you that.'

Edward's words reassured me but I couldn't stop the tears running down my face like little streams. It felt as though a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I felt my tears after a while begin to seise and I began to hiccup into Edward's chest. He was still stroking my hair and cooing reassuring things in my ear when I lifted my head to look at him. I saw his eyes were glistening with unshed tears and he look devastated like someone just killed his puppy. He looked so miserable I couldn't help but reach out and stroke his face. He leant onto my hand and closed his eyes and tear slipped out and ran down his cheek. I went to go wipe it off with my other hand but he caught it my hand in his, opening his eyes again he said 'Why didn't you tell me this Bella, God how could you keep that to yourself for so long.'

'I-I didn't want you to leave me,' I whispered.

'Why would we leave you?'

'Because everyone always does.'

He pulled me into him again and hugged me tightly he rested his chin on my head just like he used to do in the orphanage. 'You are so silly sometimes Bella, we would never leave you.'

I didn't answer him instead I took in this moment, remembering every detail of him being this close to me because it may not happen again, well not for a while at least.

'Bella come on,' he said and quickly stood up lightly pulling me up after him. 'I want to show you something.'

I sniffed and wiped my face with my sleeve again. I probably looked terrible right now. 'W-What?'

'It's a surprise,' he smiled slightly.

Even in my sad mood I found the energy to groan at this 'I hate surprises.'

'You'll love this one,' he reassured me.

I noticed his shirt was drenched on one side because of my tears and I blushed 'Sorry about the shirt.'

'Don't worry, come on, I want to show you something I haven't showed anyone else.'