Author's note: Heyhey! I've neglected this fic for faaar too long! So, me and my loverly IM story co writer DayDreamerNiteWriter have decidedified to updateify it. Madness has thus ensued, and we are left with the below O_o don't hurt me! lol. So, I still don't own Torchwood or any of the characters, not even a little bit. Next chapter is gonna be hide-n-seek, so let me know if you want anything to happen in that. Hope you enjoy the read, please r&r. love xxx
-Owen has logged on-
-Tosh has logged on-
Owen: Hey!
Tosh: How are you feeling?
Owen: I'm not.
Tosh: Oh, sorry I... I didn't mean to be insensitive...
Owen: I was kidding Tosh. I'm fine.
Tosh: Oh. Well. Do you need anything? I could go to the shops for you?
Tosh: Oh, sorry, didn't think.
Owen: Not really... Can't really use anything.
Owen: No worries...
-Martha has joined the conversation-
Owen: Hi!
Tosh: Maybe I could come over later Owen?
Owen: Sure. Think we've run out of movies...
Martha: Hey Owen, Tosh, what's happening in Cardiff?
Martha: It's pretty quiet here. Except for that Sontaran thing... Pretty quiet.
Owen: Crazy nutcase circus people making the teaboy cry mostly...
Martha: Ianto's scared of clowns?
Martha: Who'd'a thunk it!
Owen: How'd it go with them? Any left? I'd like to get my hands on one to autopsy...
Owen: He wasn't scared, he was a weepy git.
Martha: Sorry Owen, 'fraid I nearly got my hands on the few we had here, but the powers that be wouldn't let me...
Martha: Jack'd understand that though. The Doctor can be a bit sanctimonious when he wants to be!
Owen: Hmmm.... Still... baked potato...
Martha: Ok, weepy... That's... peculiar!
Tosh: Baked potato?
Owen: No it isn't! He cries all the time!
Owen: Sonataran... Potato...
Tosh: Owen, that's hardly fair!
Owen: same difference
Owen: It is! He cries every time something happens.
Martha: Except for the speaking and addiction to war, yeah, same difference.
Owen: He nearly cried when I broke the milk steamer on his precious coffee machine.
-Ianto has signed in-
-Jack has signed in-
Jack: Hey kids
Ianto: Sorry I'm late guys, what did I miss?
Owen: Nothing....
Owen: Just discussing Sontarans... And the fact that you're a cry baby...
Tosh: He didn't cry at that though... It was deeper than that!
Tosh: Hi Ianto
Tosh: Jack
Jack: Ianto's a cry baby?
Jack: Hi Tosh. Nice heels today! Sexy.
Martha: Jack! Had someone asking after you the other day... I'll let you guess for yourself though!
Jack: Tell him it's not happening. I've gone off Generals....
Tosh: Thanks Jack. They were half off in Faith. Must remember to tell Gwen...
Owen: Teaboy? You gonna retort? Or too busy crying?
Jack: Hmm... Faith... Sounds fun...
Martha: He wouldn't appreciate that, hates being classed with the army.
Jack: Oh! HIM! You saw him? Is he ok? Does he have a new someone?
Ianto: Sorry Owen, I was just making the coffee. Though, I can't do your latte. Problem with the milk frother.
Jack: Thought you meant an old flame... We used to play *ahem* war games in the UNIT boardroom...
Martha: He has a new someone...
Martha: Big, redhead, Londoner, and NOT in love with him!
Martha: Big pin to his ego I reckon... :-D
Owen: Ianto, if you need a private consult regarding your sexual health, there are better ways to tell me.
Jack: Sounds interesting... I always liked redheads ;-)
Ianto: I'm sorry, who are we talking about?
Jack: He needed deflating anyway...
Jack: Just someone...
Jack: No need to worry...
Owen: I have an idea...
Ianto: If I did, Owen, I'd go to a GP, not a doctor whose speciality is dissecting dead aliens!
Tosh: Really, Owen?
Ianto: Or indeed someone who can breathe...
Tosh: Ianto, that's below the belt and below you!
Owen: Yes, Tosh. We can discuss later...
Owen: Well, we are talking about below the belt problems...
Ianto: wait. Jack, you said no need to worry... That makes me worry!
Jack: Quit it. I can quite conclusively inform everyone that Ianto is in full working order :-P
Martha: Jack, are they always like that?
Jack: Ianto, really, it's in the past.
Martha: Oh god. TMI. Really, TMI!!
Jack: Yes. Martha, may I introduce you to my children...
Jack: How's the beret coming along?
Owen: Seriously... If there's no latte, can I have a cuppa?
Martha: oh there was this really sweet kid who was gonna get me one for you. The Doctor loved him, but he was on the front line when the other me made us attack the Sontarans...
Martha: I'm still working on it though!
Jack: If the milk frother thingy is broken... What's gonna happen to my cappuccino?
Ianto: No. You can't.
Ianto: I'm too busy hand whisking the milk for Jack's cappuccino.
Jack: hmm... keep trying. Important mission and all that. Promise to send photos!
Jack: Oh, Ianto, you're so good with your hands....
Martha: Oh, there's no need, really!
Owen: SERIOUSLY??
Tosh: JACK!
Owen: Not like I could drink the tea anyway...
Jack: TOSH!
Tosh: WHAT!
Jack: I dunno... You did it first...
Tosh: oh sorry, yeah, you and Ianto; hands, beret, good working order. Far too early...
Tosh: I'll be on the whisky by 10 at this rate!
Jack: Yeah, whatever, I can see you blushing from where I'm sitting.. You love it!
Ianto: What's wrong with my tea Frogface?
Owen: I can't digest it Ladyboy!
Tosh: Mmmffuffwa!!
Jack: Now, let's not result to petty insults, Ianto, I'm still waiting for my coffee...
Martha: Is Tosh ok?
Jack: Good typing skills for a tech expert, Tosh...
Owen: I think she melted....
Owen: I would resuscitate her, but I can't breathe...
Tosh: I object to this conversation. I have to back up some files. I may return later.
Tosh: lovely to hear from you Martha!
Jack: yeah, backing up files is what they call it nowadays :-P
-Tosh has signed off-
Owen: Think she's ok?
Ianto: Jack, can you buy me a new milk frother? My hand hurts!
Ianto: She looked fine when I gave her her tea
Jack: Anything you like baby. Why don't I buy a whole new coffee machine?
Martha: I miss your coffee Ianto. They serve sludge here in... Oh, forgot top secret place in which I'm working...
Owen: You gave her frothed tea?
Jack: Canada is not top secret... it's just often overlooked...
Ianto: No, she had plain tea, Jack had frothed milk...
Martha: Damnit, how do you do that?
Jack: Guess I'm just magic ...
Jack: Martha, I know everything... And Ianto told me...
Martha: Leaking top secret information... Grrr!
Owen: Teaboy, can we stop with the embarrassing revelations please? I don't want to be forced to do another handstand, but the urge is quite strong...
Ianto: Well, actually, Tosh is the whizz, I just look over the shoulder...
Jack: Top secret? Pah! I eat top secret for breakfast!
Martha: A handstand?
Jack: And whilst he looked over her shoulder, I looked over his ass ;-) and nice it is too!
Owen: Accidently drank beer... had to get it out of my system... Hence a handstand.
Jack: Uurgh, the memories!! I still have bile on my boots!
Martha: Hmmm, so how's that little project of yours coming along...? You're not the only ones who can find out Top Secret info!
Ianto: anyone have any ideas on how to clean that, cos it really stinks and I've tried Everything I can think of!
Jack: The 'get Ianto to let me tie him up' project, or the 'Get Ianto to accept more weapons training project'? Both are progressing... Slowly.
Owen: Vinegar?
-Tosh has signed in-
Owen: Jack, please, some of us haven't got the option to pass out from disgust here.
Ianto: tried it - actually made it worse!
Ianto: I am not accepting more weapons training!
Owen: Err... That cleany thingy you use... When stuff is... Dirty... And stuff?
Jack: Well, you already know how to work a weapon pretty well...
Ianto: Or indeed letting you tie me up. That will never happen. Never. Only. In. Your. Dreams.
-Gwen has signed in-
Jack: And dream I do ;-)
Ianto: I. Do. Not. Trust. You. To. Tie. Me. Up!
Jack: And it is hot...
Jack: Only cos I once threatened not to untie you after...
Owen: RIGHT!! THAT'S IT!! I'M LEAVING!!!
Martha: Weapon... Oh dear lord this place is worse than a house I once visited at uni!
-Owen has gone to see his weevil subjects-
Gwen: Hi guys, was just checking my emails... What's this? Why's Ianto tied up? Huh?
Tosh: Jack, I need a little assistance with a couple of passwords on um... Oh never mind doesn't matter.
Jack: ?? Tosh, are you propositioning me?
Martha: Why do I get the feeling she's trying to hack my account?
Jack: ... I'll be there in a sec!
Tosh: No, no neither of those, really, honestly!
Tosh: Eeep!
Jack: Darn...
Ianto: Oi!
Gwen: Jack, I thought you'd grown out of that phase?
Ianto: That's no way to get me to trust you
Jack: Just joking Ianto!!
Jack: Joke! Honest! Please don't look at me across the hub like that, it makes my head hurt!
Ianto: Gwen, I am not currently, nor do I ever intend to be tied up by Jack.
Gwen: Oh, phew... Guess I got confused.
Gwen: Explains why you can still type.
Ianto: -Stops glaring- Good, it's supposed to!
Ianto: Exactly, Gwen. How are you today, would you like something hot to drink?
Jack: Well... I like your tie today... It makes you look... Erm.... -thinks of a word that is not 'hot'- Handsome?
Gwen: Oooh! Have we got any chocolate sprinkles? And any whipped cream? I'd love a hot chocolate special!
Tosh: Oh, Gwen before I go and do some work, there's a half price sale on at Faith at the moment. I got these boots there.
Gwen: Ooooh! Faith! Squee!
Ianto: One hot chocolate special coming right up.
Jack: Ahhhh, the boots... They beg to be fucked...
-Ianto has left the conversation-
Jack: Ictually, Ianto... You may be running short on cream.... If you recall.... Ahem...
Jack: Crap, I'll go tell him...
Tosh: Jack, I don't think Ianto would appreciate that.
-Jack has left the conversation-
Tosh: Fucking my boots I mean... Oh dear!
Gwen: Oh dear.... Are they gonna have another pissy fight?
Gwen: Last time, Jack pouted so much he nearly tripped over his bottom lip...
Martha: Why is there a problem with cream?
Gwen: ... You don't wanna know.
Martha: Or do I not want to know?
Martha: Thought as much!
Gwen: Jack... Fetishes... This time last year, it was peanut butter...
Martha: So how was the wedding?
Gwen: Then those chuppa-chup lollies...
Martha: Oh eeew, that's disgusting!
Gwen: Oh... Er... You didn't hear?
Martha: Chuppa-chup lollies?
Martha: Yes, I did sort-of.
Gwen: It went... Well as far as can be expected for a Torchwood function...
Martha: Meant to say honeymoon.
Gwen: chuppa-chup lollies... -Nods and grimaces- It wasn't nice...
Gwen: The honeymoon, however, was amazing!
Tosh: Gwen, you're forgetting the yoghurt phase and the sushi phase...
Tosh: He actually got me to teach him how to make sushi!
Gwen: Oh, yeah... The sushi phase was funny because he kept bullying Tosh to join in.
Tosh: That too... Never ever going to happen!
Gwen: Didn't you say he went through a phase before me with Suzie and the aubergines?
Tosh: There's only one man for me...
-Jack has signed back in-
Tosh: Oh god yes, that was... Messy :-S
Jack: Nope, definitely no cream... -licks lips-
Jack: What was messy?
Gwen: Hehehe! Got any CCTV?
Martha: Hello Jack, looking forward to seeing the Doctor again, I've got some very interesting stories to tell him!
Gwen: But I wanted a hot chocolate! –pouts-
Jack: Oh? Wanna share?
Tosh: -Twitches- Cream, eep. Oh, and we were discussing aubergines Jack.
Jack: Sorry, Gwen... There are marshmallows though...
Jack: Ooohhh... The aubergines... That was... Messy :-S
Jack: Suzie was displeased....
Jack: I enjoyed myself though!
Gwen: Ooooh! Marshmallows! Yay!
Martha: Gwen.,. What CCTV did you want? Cos I may or may not have a direct link to the folder he keeps it all in...
Tosh: Marshmallows... I know we forgot something!
Jack: What are you talking about?? I certainly do not keep sexy CCTV in a folder marked 'for wanking purposes'!
Jack: Oooh.. The marshmallows.. The look on Ianto's face... Priceless!!! Hahahahaha!
Gwen: How much for the link??
Tosh: I remember walking in on him with Suzie and someone else melting marshmallows on each other and other such things...
Jack: Hehe, maybe there's a reason he doesn't trust me... took him ages to get the pink stain out of his black tie... this is why torchwood shouldn't do formal parties!
Martha: I'll send it you free if you go get me a pair of killer boots from Faith... I'm a little out of town at the moment.
Gwen: Size?
Tosh: You did marshmallows with Ianto as well... oh dear lord I thought we, I mean you decided that was a bad idea to try again!?
Martha: Oh, um, 7's please sweetheart.
Martha: Please tell me the other person wasn't you Tosh?
Jack: But the sugary goodness of the marshmallows... It was too tempting!
Jack: And who can resist Ianto's arse in his dinner suit? It's a work of art!
Tosh: No, no, it wasn't me with Jack and Suzie.
Gwen: OMG!!TOSH!! WAS IT OWEN?
Gwen: Size 7 it is.... I look forward to the link :-D
Tosh: Hmmm, Jack makes a fair point, there are few who can!
Gwen: It is true, he does have a lovely bum...
Jack: OI! Hands off ladies!
Jack: You wanna play; you play with both of us ;-)
Tosh: I think it was around about the time they found the sex perfume... Of course they didn't know it was a sex perfume until they tried it on each other...
Gwen: Hey, I'm a married woman!
Jack: I just wanted to see what would happen :-D
Tosh: Pass... Don't think for a moment I can cope with Jack Harkness on a sex rampage!
Martha: Of course you did Jack.
Jack: Not on a rampage anymore... Getting it like clockwork ;-P
Jack: Well, the outcome was amazing... -chuckles dirtily-
Martha: I've got to go... Promised I'd call Tom, he's still in Africa. BRB.
Gwen: Byee Martha!
-Martha is on the phone-
Jack: Say hi to the lucky man for me!
Tosh: Gwen, hunny, why is Rhys walking into the hub?
Gwen: Hmm... Best go get those boots. Back soon, Faith's only round the corner...
Martha: Sure thing Jack... Talk again in a mo.
Gwen: RHYS!? NO!! Right, I'm off, explain later and all that!
-Gwen has left in a supreme hurry-
Tosh: Ok, that was weird.
-Ianto has signed on-
Jack: -Rolls eyes- Great, now we have to deal with him!
Jack: -Pout-
Ianto: Gwen, I've got your hot chocolate.
Jack: Oooh... Hey Ianto!
Jack: Er... She just ran away...
Ianto: Where's she running off to??
-Rhys has signed on-
Ianto: Guess I'll drink this then...
Ianto: Hi Rhys!
Rhys: I've tried yelling at you all, but you only seem to be able to talk on MSN.. Where the fuck is my wife?
Tosh: Hi Rhys, what are you doing here?
Tosh: Dunno she just kind of bolted...
Rhys: Hi Ianto, hi Tosh.
Rhys: I'll fucking bet she did!
Tosh: Said something about buying Martha some shoes?
Rhys: Shrank my fucking Cardiff shirt, didn't she!
Rhys: I'm supposed to be at a match in two hours. Now what do I wear?
Ianto: Oh dear... Was it a special one, because I'm sure she can buy a new one!
Jack: -Snicker-
Tosh: Did you work out that machine Ianto?
Rhys: You can shut up, Harkness.
Ianto: Almost, why?
Rhys: Yeah, it was special. It was signed by the team. Now it might fit my ten year old nephew!
Tosh: It's some kind of laundry washing, clothes manipulator isn't it? Might work on Rhys' shirt.
Jack: Rhys, do you have the shirt with you?
Ianto: Well, yeah I guess, I've never tested it on stretching though...
Rhys: Course I do, I'm gonna bloody throttle her with it!
Ianto: No! No, don't do that. Chuck it here, I'll see what I can do.
Jack: Steady there! Let's not throttle anyone... Ianto, can we get a cup of tea for Rhys too?
Ianto: On my way boss man.
Rhys: Ok... S'not like you can make it worse... -Chucks shirt-
Jack: That's sir to you!
Ianto: Wow, I make awesome hot chocolate, -Slurp- Sir yes Sir –salutes-
Jack: Hehe, good job.
Ianto: Right, be right back with the tea... milk one sugar? Or shall I make it three for the shock
Rhys: Two is good... Strike a balance.
-Ianto is making tea-
Jack: Tosh, can you work the machine...
Jack: Stupid question, I know.
Tosh: I can turn it on, and prepare the shirt... But I don't know the precise settings.
Tosh: Ianto worked most of this out...
Jack: well, if you get things set up, Ianto can take over...
Tosh: No worries... Right, first that switch, there the machine is warming up. I'll just soak the shirt. Won't be long.
-Tosh is away-
-Ianto has returned, again-
Jack: So.. Rhys... Nice honeymoon?
Ianto: Has Tosh started the machine?
Rhys: ... Yeah, thanks... It was really good to have Gwen to myself for a while...
Jack: Yeah... She's sorting the shirt out.
Ianto: Here's your coffee, that's great.
-Tosh is online-
Jack: Mmmh coffee... For me?
Tosh: There you go Ianto.
Ianto: Luckily, even though I said coffee and meant tea for Rhys, I have indeed made you a cup of coffee.
Rhys: Cheers mate!
Jack: You are a god!
Ianto: Cheers Tosh, now I pop this in here, feed that in there and wait 5 minutes...
Ianto: I know!
-Martha is online-
Jack: -drinks noisily and makes pornographic coffee-appreciation sounds-
Martha: So modest Ianto!
Rhys: That good eh?
Martha: Tom says hi.
Jack: Nyaaaah.... -melts into goo-
Rhys: Hello... Martha, is it?
Martha: Oh... You must be Rhys, Gwen's husband, I'm Martha Jones.
Martha: Yep that's me.
Rhys: I'd like to say she's talked about you, but she doesn't say much about work really...
Martha: Well that's probably for the best.
Rhys: Tell me about it. Alien bloody whales and all that!
Jack: Mmmuh... Coffee... Good...
Martha: Hey, I forgot, how did you guys cope with the Sontaran smoke of death, doom and destruction?
Jack: We hid in my hole and drank coffee...
Martha: Yeah, she told me about that... That was horrible, poor thing!
Martha: You all fitted? In there? REALLY?
Jack: It's one of the events of the past I was taught about in the future... So I knew it would... Blow over.
Jack: Heeey! Contrary to what Ianto says, there is adequate space in my hole for everyone!
Tosh: Ianto... I hate to say this... but there's smoke coming out of that machine...
Rhys: What? I'm not getting this...
Rhys: WHAT!!!!
Martha: If you knew it was going to happen... Why didn't you SAY SOMETHING!!!!!
Ianto: Don't worry, don't worry. I'm sure it's supposed to do that...
Jack: BECAUSE I KNEW YOU'D SORT IT OUT!
Ianto: -Opens lid tentatively- Oh bugger!
Jack: Sorry for the yelling. Martha, if I could tell people every time bad things were going to happen, I would, but you of all people should know about how fragile time is.
Jack: I wont risk changing the future.
Rhys: What?? What is it!!
Martha: Yeah, yeah, yeah, spoilers I know... But you could have saved me from the evil cloning bastard baked potatoes, I'm still having nightmares!
Ianto: Rhys, what size should it be?
Jack: Nightmares are good for you. They build character...
Ianto: Please don't panic or freak out...
Jack: Least that's what I told Ianto after the cannibals tried to eat him...
Rhys: Ok -Takes deep breaths- Should be an L...
Tosh: That's such a typical male thing to say!
Rhys: -Grimaces-
Ianto: That's what I thought...
Jack: Yeah, well, I said it when we were snuggled up in bed watching Atonement because he couldn't sleep. AND I was being all cuddly... So there!
Ianto: would an XXL be much too big then -Scratches head nervously-
Rhys: Well... It was getting a bit tight... Beer gut and all... But that is a bit baggy... Yeah...
Rhys: But I can still wear it if it's baggy... Right?
Tosh: Well, I guess that makes the time you said it to Ianto ok, but not to Martha. She went through something really traumatic!
Jack: I mean... Atonement! Cuddling!
Ianto: Well, XXL may have been an understatement...
Jack: Meh... cloning is fun!
Ianto: I'll try it again...
Rhys: -Growls- What have you done!!??
Jack: I'm gonna have to ask you not to speak to Ianto like that, even if he has made your shirt into a tent...
Martha: Oh God no, Jack you sick, sick f$&**%&*#$%
Jack: Otherwise, I will kill you... :-)
Jack: Whaaaaaaat?? You know you love it ;-)
Ianto: It's not quite the size of a tent, more a duvet cover.
Rhys: You know what, I fucking give up!
Jack: There.. Now you have a signed duvet......
Ianto: But I can fix it. All I have to do is flip that switch reverse that and leave it alone for 2 minutes.
Rhys: You'd better fix it.
Ianto: HEY I'm trying to help you here!
Jack: Again, less threatening Ianto. I mean it about the killing...
Rhys: Alright, alright. Thank you Ianto for being so helpful.
Ianto: If you're not careful, it won't even fit your tiny insignificant penis.
Rhys: -grumbles-
Ianto: Thank you that's better.
Jack: -Gasp- That was a little harsh lover...
Tosh: Wow.... Ianto... That was... Masterful!
Martha: -Waves pompoms- Go, Ianto go! Go, Ianto go!
Rhys: -mouth flaps open and shut like a fish out of water- Guh...
Jack: Actually, kinda sexy when you get all authoritative... –muses-
Jack: Definitely sexy.... Yup...
Ianto: Don't you bloody start Harkness... Otherwise that beloved trench coat...
Jack: I'm quiet! I'm quiet!
Ianto: .... Oh, sorry, forget the threat to the coat... Sorry... But stay quiet.
Jack: -Hugs coat protectively- But... But Ianto... You love my coat...
-DING-
Jack: ^__^ Jack is a good boy!
Rhys: And??? How is it??
Ianto: Yes Jack, yes I do... It is most helpful, and I wouldn't dream of destroying it.
Tosh: You do know that threat will never work again now don't you Ianto?
Jack: -Nods vigorously-
Jack: Hehe, I win!
Martha: Yeah... Kinda lost it there sweetie...
Ianto: And I am awesome!
Jack:-Does the winning dance-
Jack: Awesome? Yes... But why?
Rhys: Forget all this... How's my fucking shirt!?
Ianto: Rhys, one signed Cardiff shirt, resized, unstained, and ironed.
Rhys: YESSSS! Thanks mate, that's amazing!
Ianto: That's why I'm awesome...! Oh dear... Silly people.
Ianto: You are welcome.
Jack: -Pout- You called me silly... -Pout more- Does that mean I'm not sexy anymore?
Rhys: Look, guys I gotta go, pre-match stuff starts soon. Say hi to Gwen for me...
-Rhys has gone off singing loud football songs-
Martha: Ianto, do you think that thing could get the smell of clones out of clothes? Only I was quite fond of what I was wearing, and a new lab coat costs a fricking fortune!
Jack: Maybe it could get the Owen sick off my boots...?
Ianto: Should do yeah, just have it couriered over.
Ianto: It could indeed.
Tosh: I was about to say that.
Jack: Brilliant! -Takes boots off-
Tosh: Martha, you are lucky you aren't in the Hub...
Tosh: Ianto how do you sleep with that foot odour?
Jack: Heeey! They don't smell that bad!
Jack: Who said anything about sleeping?
Ianto: Hmmm boots... That's this setting and then this one and then fiddle this knob, flick that lever, spin that bit round and drop them in...
Martha: Jack, is it just me or does he remind you of someone?
Jack: If you hurt my boots, I get to tie you up as penance...
Jack: He reminds me of.... Nope... Nobody... Tell me!
Jack: Oh wait!!
Ianto: Fine, fine... As long as there's whipped cream involved... Afterwards...
Jack: No waaaay! O_o
Jack: I'll order some in ;-)
Jack: Are you suggesting what I think Miss Jones?
Martha: Just the way he's muttering to himself, flicking those switches... Kinda the way the Doctor does with the TARDIS don'tcha think?
Jack: I would never compare them, but... Yeah I s'pose so...
Jack: 'Cept the Doctor doesn't have love bites on his neck.
Ianto: Shush... You promised you wouldn't mention those!
-Gwen had entered the conversation tentatively-
Gwen: Has he gone?
Jack: Oh, come now, everyone can see them.
Martha: Tosh, check for me! Take a photo and send it!
Jack: Hi Gwen...
Jack: Yes, he's gone.
Ianto: I rather think I'd hidden them quite well.
Tosh: I pulled the shirt collar down... yep they're there. Should be receiving the photo soon...
Gwen: What? The love bites?? You might as well have put up a neon arrow saying 'look here at what I've been doing!'
Gwen: Was Rhys... Ok?
Tosh: The ones you can see are a few days old...
Tosh: The better ones are just underneath the tie and collar.
Jack: And there's more where they came from... I get bored whilst he's sleeping...
Ianto: -Glaring at everyone- He's fine Gwen. I fixed the shirt. He's gone to the pub, or possibly the bar in the stadium.
Gwen: Oh, Ianto love, you're a star!!
Jack: You glare now, but you know you love it!
Gwen: Oh, Martha, I got your boots. Want me to post them or will you be around any time soon?
Ianto: Yeah I guess so...
Jack: Ianto.... you know.... never mind.
Martha: Um, keep them for a bit... I'm not really sure what I'm doing for the next couple of weeks
Ianto: what?
Gwen: Sure thing love.
Jack: Doesn't matter...
Gwen: Well, I'd best go home and sort out dinner for when he gets back from the match...
Ianto: I was wondering, do you fancy checking on that plant we found and put in the hot house?
Jack: Ooh... The plant... Yeah, actually, that'd be fun...
Gwen: I'm off before the heavy petting starts... See you later!
Martha: Yeah, I'm supposed to be sorting out the transport for tomorrow... Talk soon guys, whenever I'm free anyway.
-Gwen has bumbled home-
Tosh: Yeah me too!
Martha: Ianto, can you tell Gwen that I'll email her that link, and Direct Debit the money?
-Tosh has signed off and gone in search of Owen-
Ianto: No worries... Talk soon.
Martha: Cheers sweetheart.
Jack: Bye Martha.
-Martha is offline-
Ianto: So just you and me?
Jack: Soo.... Hot house?
Ianto: Race you there
Jack: Hehe you're on!
-Ianto is offline-
-Jack is offline-