. . : Kouseiton'i Kunoichi : . .
Chapter 4 – Snowball's Chance in Hell
By twilightotaku
AUTHOR'S NOTE: SORRY SORRY SORRY for the late update! But i went to go boxing week shopping, and started a new story becasue the idea was hovering in my mind since Chapter 2~ ANyways, I'd like to thank all reviewers, and voters!!! Just to let you know, the following chapter is over 3k, so its like an apology! Please don't pelt me with tomatoes! *hides behind ginormous notebook* anywho, the following is the votes:
GAARA/KAGOME - 18 votes ITACHI/KAGOME - 15 votes NEJI/KAGOME - 12 votes SASUKE/KAGOME - 8 votes
Naruto has been taken off becasue he only has 5 votes T-T BUT he will have a brotherly relationship with Kagome that will give him some love too :3
KEEP VOTING! YOU HAVE ONE VOTE PER CHAPTER! AKA YOU CAN VOTE FOR THIS CHAPTER TOO :)
Before:
"Ok, ok. Today, we'll head to the Hokage's Office and get your first D-Rank Mission. After we complete it, we'll report back, and collect the reward, Then, I have something to show you guys. After that, you'll be free until tomorrow. Are you guys ready?"
"HAI!" came the enthusiastic chorus from Sakura, Naruto, and Kagome. Sasuke merely 'hm-ed' and Kakashi sweat dropped.
This will turn out...quite fascinating, a voice from the shadows thought, oblivious to the suspicious looks he was getting from other civilians. Yes, quite interesting...
Now:
"Come in" a low, baritone voice could be heard through the thick oak doors of the Hokage's Office as Team Seven walked in- eh, well Naruto kind of burst in- and the more respectful members bowed. (Kagome and Kakashi)
"Ehh... Team Seven is it?" the old man looked up from his paperwork, pipe in his mouth. "Ready for next mission?" his dark brown eyes twinkled in amusement as he took in the team.
"OLD MAN! STOP GIVING US STUPID D-CLASS MISSIONS!" Naruto shouted, his eyes blazing in anger. "I STILL REMEMBER HOW YOU KILLED MY EXCITEMENT FOR D-RANK MISSIONS IN MY FIRST ONE!"
Team Seven winced noticeably, remembering their first ever mission as Genin.
. : Flashback : .
"Black is in the perimeter."
"PINK is in the perimeter..." this was followed by high pitched giggles.
"Orange is in the house! Believe it!" sweat drop marks appeared on two heads.
"Good. Blue is in perimeter. On my count, black take the top-left corner of the net. Pink will take the top right corner. Orange the bottom left, and I the bottom right. Ready? 3...2...1.... DROP!"
A black net dropped onto their target, each side closing around their victim; an audible screech could be heard from the orange tabby.
" Mission: Capture the fugitive- Status: Complete!" Four blurs ran towards the tall building that was the Hokage's Tower, muttering about 'crappy missions' the entire way there.
. : End Flashback : .
"I WANT BETTER MISSIONS, OLD MAN!" he continued on, voicing everybody's thoughts; well, except for pinkie, who was thinking of a certain dark-eyed dark-haired person on their team.
"Fine..." the Hokage sighed, much to the surprise of Kakashi-sensei. "You're going on a C-class mission. Your duty is to escort the client to the Land of the Waves, without him being harmed at all. Once there, you must be his bodyguard until his construction is done."
"Oh, oh, who are we escorting? A prince? A queen? Or some fancy religious guy?" Naruto was practically bouncing up and down, ecstatic that he finally got his wish granted.
"Eh..." the Sandaime (Third Hokage) motioned to the ANBU guards that were stationed by the doors. "Send him in" he commanded.
As the doors opened, a drunk, elderly man stumbled in, his eyes narrowing at the sight of the four brats that were to be guarding him.
"You're sending four gakis (brats) to escort me- Tazuna the Expert Bridge Builder?!? Come on, you probably have some other older and taller ninjas! I mean, look at that kid with the stupid looking face, and the short black-haired girl! They probably can`t even harm a fly!" he mocked, taking another slurp from his bottle of sake (wine).
In less than a second, Kagome was behind their 'client' and held a kunai to his throat. Nobody, not even Kakashi, saw her move. "We are more than capable to handle this mission, after all, isn't it only C-rank mission, right?" she pushed the kunai closer to his throat, threateningly. "I assure you, we are more than capable in handling this mission" she hissed into his ear, before unhanding him and going to stand by Naruto.
"Who are you calling stupid looking?!" Naruto shouted, his face red, and anger tick dancing on his head. "I'll kill you!" he lunged towards the man, before being pulled back and dumped onto the ground unceremoniously by a bored looking Kagome.
"Ne, Naru-kun. It would be stupid to kill the person we're suppose to protect. Remember our little promise, and I won't make you hold Ubuge-chan (soft) during our next training session!" Naruto paled at the thinly veiled threat, scared stiff of 'Ubuge-chan'.
Kagome moved her hand to her pocket, and as both Sasuke, Kakashi, the Sandaime, and Tazuna tensed up, thinking she was going to pull out a weapon, but confused when she pulled out a... teddy bear.
"TEDDIE BEAR?!?" three voices chorused together, suspicious as to why Naruto would be afraid of it.
"Keep it away from me!" he screeched, before running over to the Hokage and hiding behind his figure.
"What's so scary about a children's toy?" Sasuke raised his eyebrow, and his question was soon answered when Kagome threw it at him.
"Kagome makes me carry that while running around Konoha 100 times a day, then makes me do push-ups with that thing on my back!" he looked close to tears.
"Ooommpphh.." Sasuke faltered under the teddy bear, causing Kakashi to sweat drop and the Sandaime to shake his head in amusement. "How much does this thing weigh?" Kagome walked over to him, and picked up the bear using only two fingers.
"500 lbs. Wait until you see his 'mother'," her eyes glimmered in glee.
"500 LBS.?!?!" The eyes of the group widened imperceptibly.
"Ano, maybe you should start on your mission..." the Sandaime hinted, attempting to hide his laughter with his hand. Kagome took the hint and stuffed the bear back into her pocket.
"Meet by the front gates in thirty minutes. Bring all of your equipment," Kakashi commanded, before poofing off to Kami (God) knows where.
"Ja ne (See ya)" Kagome too, disappeared.
THIRTY MINUTES LATER
The group assembled in front of the massive green gates, drawing curious stares from others as they checked over their weapons.
"Ready?" Kakashi asked, eyes crinkling in amusement as he saw Sakura and Naruto's mouths gaping open because of the fact that he was not late.
"Hai (yes) sensei" Kagome spoke smoothly as they started to move.
After walking for what seemed like five hours, but in reality was only one hour, the group settled down for a break, as Tazuna the 'expert bridge builder' needed his rest. Taking out a breakfast bar, Kagome ate it thoughtfully, sensing three auras in the surrounding woods. Thinking quickly, she whipped out her backpack and took out a clear glass tube of what looked like water. Motioning for the other ninjas to drink it, she took the last sip, eager to explain after noting the quizzical looks of Kakashi and Sasuke.
Hey guys, don't jump up, flinch, or do anything stupid in shock. The 'water' you just drank allows us to hear each our most concentrated thoughts; I needed to find a way to tell you something without alerting the subject of my thoughts.
SUGOI! Kagome-chan, that's so cool! Did you make this yourself? How did you make it? Can I-
Dobe- shut up so she can tell us what she wanted to say!
I agree with Sasuke, though not in the same way he so delicately put it.
There's five people in the surrounding forests. I think they are hired bandits to get rid of Tazuna-san. I can hear at least three kunais being brandished, so watch your step. Their coming in from all directions. Left, right, forward, behind, and I think one of them is about to go underground with his chakra to surround us.
Good job, Kagome. Sakura, protect Tazuna at all costs. Naruto, watch Sakura's back, and take the guy coming from the ground. Sasuke, take the guy from the left, and from behind. Kagome, take the one coming from the front, and the one on the right. I'll make sure that there are no reinforcements. Count us down, Kagome.
Alright. 3...2...1... NOW!
Simultaneously, five people jumped out at once. Already anticipating their opponent's surprise, Team Seven worked together to drive them back, and not 10 minutes later, the bandits were already tied up and gagged. Smirking, Sasuke pulled out the leader, who was dressed in fancier clothes, and kicked him in his stomach.
"Who sent you" he glared at the leader, his foot hovering threateningly.
"We'll never tell you, gaki (brat)!" the leader spat at Sasuke's feet, and as the avenging-driven Uchiha was about to lunge at the man, but Kakashi pulled him back, rolling his eyes at his student's impulsiveness.
"What to do, what to do," Kakashi asked himself comically as he weighed out his options. He could kill them, or send them to Konoha for questioning from Ibiki, but both had problems he had yet to work out; for example, if he chose to send them back to Konoha, who would ensure that they didn't escape?
"Ano...sensei; why don't you write a quick note to Ibiki-san, and teleport yourself along with them," she pointed at the gagged up bandits and the loudmouth leader, "straight to the Hokage's Office, throw the note towards him, and teleport back?" Kagome interrupted his train of thought, giving a better idea.
"Hmm... Yes, I guess that would work, but that leaves the fact that I do not have any paper," he paled considerably as he saw all his students eye his beloved Icha Icha Paradise book. "Whatever you're thinking, stop thinking about it!" the chibi-kakashi in his mind was starting to hyperventilate, as he struggled to keep on a menacing facade. "You don't have a snowball's chance in hell!"
Looking towards each other, the Genin members of Team Seven lunged at their sensei at the exact moment Kagome disappeared, only to reappear underneath the ground, both hands on her teacher's ankles. Pulling him down, Sasuke and Naruto attacked him to keep his hands busy as Sakura jumped in to grab the book. Being successful, the team teleported about 10 feet away, and watched in happiness as Kagome tore out the pages and bit her thumb, scribbling madly with her blood as her ink. Smiling, she handed the note to Sasuke and whispered something into his ear, which he promptly smirked at, and he put a hand on the rope that held the bandits, and teleported away.
The moment Sasuke disappeared, Kagome 'accidentally' burnt the book with a fire jutsu, and watched as it turned to black ashes.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Kakashi's mourning voice could be heard in each of the Hidden Villages.
. : Down in Hell : .
"What the ****?!?" a tall, red figure screamed as he was repeatedly pelted with a white object. Turning to investigate the white substance, his eyes widened in shock. "A snowball?!?" he turned his head desperately, as if in denial as he witnessed the fiery pits of his realm turn white.
Instead of scorching lakes of lava, it was like a frozen lake, with prisoners who were being burnt eternally now ice skating. The stalactites were now like Christmas trees, decorated with lights and ornaments. The sulphur that should have been in the air was now fluffy, falling snowflakes. The 'man' screeched in distress, as he finally noticed his own clothing.
Instead of the custom made red Armani suit and black shoes, he was now in a gaudy pink suit with white shoes! It was an absolute disgrace that he, Satan, the very embodiment of evil was now in tacky cloths that would have put a color-blinded old lady in shame! He started twitching; somebody was going to pay...
He started plotting revenge plans, and was shocked yet again as his loyal minions, the Seven Deadly Sin Sisters, dressed in bright colors, enjoying hot chocolate while talking about who made the best God Damned snow angel! His face now an unhealthy shade of purple, he ran to the observation room, impatient to find the perpetrator and deal with him accordingly...
. : Back on the Earth's Surface : .
When Sasuke returned, his face was still stuck in his arrogant smirk as he motioned to Kagome sadistically. Naruto, curious, stared at Kagome as well. Sakura was just jealous yet again that `her` Sasuke was paying attention to Kagome.
Rummaging in her backpack, Kagome pulled out a sketchbook, along with a box that was filled with various colors of paint and ink- Kakashi started convulsing in anger.
"You mean to tell me that you already had paper, yet you proceeded to rip up my book, which may I add is more valuable than you can guess?!" at least five anger tick marks appeared on his head as he glared at Kagome, who was no doubt, the mastermind of the whole ordeal.
"Hai, sensei!" Kagome chirped happily, as if oblivious to the killing intent in Kakashi's aura.
~*~*~
After walking for another good three hours, it was now early afternoon when they came across a great river. The water looked calm, but Kagome knew it to be very deep, and probably had a really strong current.
"Over here, Tazuna-san!" a male voice called from in front of a wooden motor boat near the water's edge.
"Kobuno-san! I can't thank you enough for helping me!" Tazuna cried as he jumped towards the man, shaking his hand firmly. (NOTE: Kobuno means boat in Japanese :) thought that would be cool for his name as he is unnamed in the anime)
"Don't worry about it! Now, are these the ninjas you got to protect you?" Kobuno asked; after seeing his friend's nod, he gestured for them to get on the boat.
Subsequent to the entire group getting onto the boat, the motor was turned on, and they went for about 3 yards before Kobuno turned off the motor and grabbed a giant paddle from the recesses of his craft.
"Sugoi! The bridge look so-" Naruto started loudly, staring at the large incomplete structure in awe.
"Shut up! The reason I turned off the motor was to make sure that there would be no one noticing our presence!" the man hissed venomously. Shocked, Naruto turned to Kakashi, who shrugged.
Upon their arrival on land, Tazuna thanked Kobuno profusely, before motioning for the group to follow the path ahead. They trekked through the dirt path, in a formation where Naruto was in the front, followed by Tazuna behind, with Kagome and Sakura on either sides. Sasuke was behind them beside Kakashi.
"GET DOWN!" Kagome shouted the moment she spotted the puddle not 5 feet away from them. Forcing Tazuna down, she made sure the other members of their little traveling group was down, before a giant cleaver shaped object came whizzing out of the surrounding area, that would have lobbed off their heads if not for her warning.
"So, the little girl spotted my trap... I wonder how she did," a voice mocked from the shadows. Team Seven tensed immediately, their hands moving slowly to their kunai pouches.
"There was a puddle in the middle of the road. It has not rained for nearly a month," she replied back coolly, her eyes darting back and forth, her body shaking with visible excitement.
"Very good... But do you know who I am?" a tall, dark figure came from the shadows, a huge sword hefted on his back. The lower portion of his face was wrapped in white bandages, and his hitai-ate was tied around his forehead so that the know was by one ear while the actual metal piece was by the other. He wore nothing but a pair of blue pants with weird black stripes, and his chest was bare except for a flipped 'y' shaped piece of cloth. He wore arm warmers that were white with black spots.
"Zabuza Momochi; Missing Ninja from Kirigakure (the Hidden Mist Village); otherwise known as the Demon of the Hidden Mist. Many years ago, the graduation ceremony that was held there was forever banned because of that year's event. The normal ceremony was to pit each student against the other until one came out alive, and the other dead. About twenty years ago, the ceremony was interrupted as a child that had no ninja training single-handedly massacred the entire year's graduates," she answered, her voice as cold as ice, ignoring the incredulous looks she was getting from her teammates.
"Mou, mou, this little girl learned her history well!" he chuckled gleefully. "Ah, what fun those years were. Just simple, cold-blooded killing," he sighed wistfully, as if recalling an old friend. "Oh, what do we have here! Hatake Kakashi, the infamous Copy Ninja!" he smiled at Kakashi, anticipation in the air.
"Kagome, Sasuke, Sakura, Naruto, watch over Tazuna. Do not interrupt the fight at all," Kakashi commanded. He pulled up his hitai-ate, to reveal a pin-wheel like eye.
"Unleashing the Sharingan already, Kakashi? I'm honoured!" Zabuza mocked. As the fight started, Naruto and Sasuke turned to look at Kagome, and asked two different questions.
"What's the Sharingan?"
"Why does sensei have the Sharingan?"
Fuming from both rage and jealousy, she glared blackly at the back of Kagome's head as she turned towards the boys. Stupid Kagome...She thinks she can steal my Sasuke! Hmph, well she's got a thing coming! Sasuke only like ME! Came the dark thoughts of pinkie.
Turning back towards the fight, Kagome answered the questions. "The Sharingan is the Kekkai Genkai (Bloodline Inheritance) of the Uchiha Clan. With it, he can cast almost unbreakable Genjutsus, and is practically invincible to other Genjutsu while concentrating; he can also copy another ninja's moves, for example, hand signs. The reason he has it is because about ten years ago, when he was in a team coupled with Uchiha Obito and a girl named Rin. The Yondaime was their Jounin instructor. On a mission they attended together, Obito saved his life, but he himself lay dying. Rin, the medic-ninja of the group, was requested by Obito to give Kakashi his Sharingan, which she agreed to because it was considered their friend's dying wish."
As the fight ranged on, she gasped the moment Kakashi was in the water.
"Watch out sensei! It's a binding Jutsu!" she cried, but it was too late. Zabuza held her teacher in a water binding jutsu. Muttering blackly, she told Sakura and Naruto to watch Tazuna, and took out Tessaiga quickly, ignoring her teachers cries to take Tazuna and run.
"Are you crazy, or going senile, old man?!" Naruto shouted. "What type of team would we be if we left you here! Wasn't that what the first test was about? We will never leave a man...er... or woman behind!" he continued on, determination burning brightly in his eyes. Nodding to Sakura, the two took out their kunais, just in case Zabuza had a water clone nearby.
Transforming her charm sized Tessaiga, she pounced on Zabuza, before neatly cutting him into two, so fast that he didn't even have a chance to pull his sword out. An audible puff of smoke replaced him, and water came pouring out of what use to be Zabuza.
"This is going to be so much fun," Kagome smiled, before sheathing her huge sword. Doing a couple hand signs, she got ready for her next attack.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: YAY! ~Squeal
hoped you guys liked that! Keep in mind voting deadline comes out soon... BTW you know when they get back Kankuro makes his appearance? Well i'll be doing something toatlly new and original with that! the actual chuunin exams will probably start in 2-3 chapters; there will be a PARTY! wheeeeee~
im high on sugar again :) SORRY FOR THE LATENESS!
please read and review, and VOTE! in the end, they will ALL get some loving, but the victor will get the fluffy type of romaNce, while the others more like bestfriend/brotherly type relationship XD
keepin it real,
twiliightotaku