Chapter 16

"How are you Brandon?"

"Grammy it's BRIAN."

"Oh yes, Bryce, I knew that."

Jesus Christ, Brian thought during his monthly phone call to his grandmother. Why do I put myself through this again?

"Anyway, Grammy, how are you?"

"Just fine, Brandon. Was it you who had the baby yet?"

"What?! Grammy, I'm a man." He tried to keep himself from laughing.

"Oh yes, sorry, Brianna."

Brian pinched the bridge of his nose. Sometimes I'd rather listen to cats have sex or get a root canal then talk to this woman, he thought.

So when are you going to make your dream come true, sonny boy??

"Grammy, I've been with the department for six years. I just got promoted to Major Case, in fact."

"I thought your dream was to be a rock star."

He had to laugh. " I haven't wanted to be a rock star since I was five."

"Who are you again?"

"Brian, your oldest grandchild."

"Oh yes, that's right. Bruce. I have to go now. i L'amano, sonny boy."

"i L'amano, Grammy."

"Jesus tap dancing Christ," Brian groaned after he hung up. "I don't know why I put myself through this every month."

Lorelei looked up from her book. "What was that all about?"

He sighed. "My role as the dutiful grandson," he replied. "I check in with her at least once a month. Why I have no idea, being she doesn't even know who the hell I am half of the time. She still thinks I'm still at the academy, for the love of God."

"Does she have Alzheimer's?" Lorelei asked sympathetically.

"That or some shit," Brian answered. "Or she's just fucking nuts."

"Brian, that's no way to talk about your grandmother."

"She thinks I have a wedding planned in six months. I'm not even engaged, what the hell?"

"Probably has you confused with someone else."

"Yeah," he replied, sitting down beside her. "So what are you reading this time?"

"Proust," Lorelei said, "Cities of the Plain."

"I don't think I'm familiar with that one."

She laughed. "Not many people read Proust these days. The original books were in French, but these are translated into English."

"Good thing," Brian grinned. "I don't even know French. I barely know a little Italian, and that's half my heritage."

"You know, Joey's been looking for something to do a book report outside of the usual stuff. I may recommend this to her."

"What, you're going to make my kid a genius?" Brian kidded.

Lorelei couldn't help but smile. "You say that like it's a bad thing."

"In this case, it may be a good thing, now that she and Marie managed to get a well-rounded woman into my house. Don't ask me how, but they succeeded, and for once, I'm not going to complain."