Disclaimer: All things recognizable are property of J.K. Rowling.

When she awoke a few hours later, she panicked until she saw Severus enter her room from the bathroom. Seeing she was awake, he grinned again.

It brought a smile to her face. "I could get used to that," she said as he sat beside her on the bed. She reached out for him and he seemed relieved momentarily before moving to take her in his arms.

"Best not..." he said. Lily savoured the low rumble of his chest as he spoke. She ran her hands over his arms.

"What if..." she paused, "you stayed here for the rest of the weekend?"

A long pause. "Probably not a good idea."

Lily threaded her fingers between his. "Why not?" The innocence in her voice didn't reveal her inner turmoil. She had a sudden thought of kissing Severus each day and waking to see his smile. Her mind was racing. They could do it. She could do it. She turned over so she was above him, her hair dangling over his face. He felt the strands between his fingers.

"Such soft hair," he murmured, amazement in his voice.

She smiled. "How can you be so surprised by so many things about me?" She pecked the end of his nose and he smiled. It warmed her heart.

"I've learned a lot in a short time," he said diplomatically. "And there seems to be more...I guess that surprises me."

Lily found it an apt statement and kissed him for it. When she broke away, she had only a vague idea of what she was going to do.

"James and I are sort of dating, but that's easily changed with an owl or maybe using the floo network. I don't know - I mean, does seven months warrant a face-to-face?"

She could not believe the look on his face.

He took a long moment to find his voice. "I don't think I understand, Lily. What are you suggesting?"

"Well, this may be a little strange considering I am in my birthday suit, but maybe our mutual feelings warrant a relationship? At the very least, James has been cheated on." Her voice shook slightly. "I have to break up with him."

"I won't tell him, Lily."

He refused to meet her eyes then and she felt a lump form in her throat. "It doesn't matter."

"Yes it does." His hands clenched and unclenched in his lap. She wished she was dressed. "You can still go back to your old life. You need to do that." His voice was so even and calm...it was both painful and reassuring.

"I don't want to."

"Lily," she shivered at the way he said her name...low, breathy, reverent, "It is safer and simpler for you to stay with Potter. As much as I hate to admit - I am almost certainly not ideal mate material. I have responsibilities that -"

She figured she'd have to get indignant. "So you don't want me, then. That's okay. I tried." She reached for his hand.

"Have you known me to do things rashly? Yes, I do things I don't want to do - nearly constantly - but what we did earlier was not one of those things."

"Oh, so I'm not awful in bed, thanks...I think." She was trying to joke.

"You don't need to do that. If you want a compliment, you could just tell me."

She huffed and made a noise, trying not to smirk.

"You are amazing, Lily Evans," he said, pulling her into an embrace. "In every way, manner, form or shape."

"Not bad," she said, returning the hug. "But does that mean you want me."

He looked slightly ashamed, but whispered, "Yes." He kissed her then, but she pushed away after only a few seconds.

"I am referring to a relationship, Severus."

His eyes met hers and they both quietly stared. She wasn't sure what he was looking for, but she saw nothing but his penetrating gaze.

"I don't know how to be a boyfriend, Lily. I'll only disappoint you." His gaze was softer now, but no less intense. He was so close his breath was on her face.

She couldn't help but smile at him, his...emotions so amazing considering how cold and rigid he was otherwise. Seeing it warmed her heart and she snuggled against him.

"I would really like to try," she said simply, kissing his neck softly, slowly, her fingers going to his pants top button.

"I...I want to see you every day." He blurted out. She grinned against his neck. He kissed her hair. "There are some things we may not be able to discuss."

She didn't respond immediately. What else could be done? She understood - at least vaguely - their predicament. His growing involvement with the Death Eaters, her new involvement with The Order...she shook her head to rid herself of the doubts. Their houses could still force a wedge between them and that made her sad really. "We will make it work." She forced the worries from her mind.

"For you..." he whispered, pulling her tighter to him.

----

Her hand shook as she attempted to find the words to tell James it was over.

Severus had tactfully left the room to shower, but she knew she couldn't dawdle.

She visualized James' face, closing her eyes. His playful hazel eyes sparkling behind his glasses, mussed up dark brown hair...James was a warm person - both literally and emotionally. His body temperature ran a bit high, so his touch was always slightly warmer than her own.

Lily was momentarily truly sad that she would not share in the warmth of his embrace again. Her eyes flew open then and the words came.

Dear James,

I am sorry for what I am about to write.

Sometime you simply cannot help who you love. I am in love with someone else. It was unexpected and I really am sorry.

I understand if you hate me.

It is all my fault.

Lily E.

She read the note (as it was certainly too short to be a letter) over and over. She could think of no better way than the roundabout truth.

She sealed the note and called her owl over. Freud was gone with the letter before she'd even realized it and she sat heavily on her bed, feeling both agitated and relieved. Lily wasn't sure how James would react. He might not believe it was from her at all. At least, she reasoned, he's unlikely to come here since he's out of the country. She felt a bit better at the thought. James' temper could be frightening...and if he discovered Severus there...she suddenly felt sick.

She stood and dressed quickly. When Severus entered, he was wearing the same clothes, but his hair was wet and he looked refreshed.

She smiled at the sight of him and he returned he smile shyly almost. She found it endearing.

She walked over and slid her hands around his waist. "I just sent the news to James."

His hands tightened around her. "It's real now." The words sent shivers down her spine. She could only nod against him, squeezing him tightly. "We should discuss something, Lily."

He pulled away and they sat on the bed.

"The Death Eaters have certain expectations of me."

Her eyes narrowed. "Such as?"

He ran his hand through his hair. "So far, only obedience. Eventually, I imagine I will brew potions for the Dark Lord."

Lily tried to keep her temper in check. It was not working well. "What do you mean eventually?"

He met her eyes. "What?"

"You plan to continue working for them?"

He looked shocked. "Of course." Her eyes widened. He continued, "How else am I to protect you in the war?" He was running his hands through her hair. "I won't let anyone hurt you."

She squeezed her eyes shut. "Severus, I haven't asked for your protection. I can take care of myself."

"Be that as it may, I believe it is a boyfriend's responsibility, nay - duty, to protect his love." She squeezed him tightly, unsure what to do. The conversation was far from over, but he was obviously trying to change the subject.

For now, Lily let him.

"I love you, too." She kept her head buried against him, but he pulled her away, forcing her to look at him.

His voice was serious. "Say it again, Lily." His eyes were boring into her own and she felt suddenly nervous. Not for the words or sentiment, but for him. For his future. For the choices she knew were inevitable.

She tucked her thoughts away and smiled at the intent look on his pale face. His stubborn nature alone might get them through this, she mused.

"I love you, Severus." The joy on his face at that sentence made the whole thing worth it, she thought with a smile.

He wrapped himself around her and they fell onto the unmade bed. He kissed her face and she couldn't help but stare at him.

She marvelled at his happiness and couldn't help but hope.

"Does that mean you love me too?"

He stopped kissing her to meet her eyes. "Lily, I -"

She laughed and brought her finger to his lips. "I don't want to make you say it." He shook his head. She smiled again. "Really...it's okay." She pulled his face to hers to kiss him.

He pulled back to look at her. She saw how relaxed he was. She saw how happy he was. She felt a pleasing warmth in her chest and a tear came to her eye.

"By now you must know how I feel about you."

"Only words, Severus."

He met her eyes again and the serious look there made her heart flutter.

"I'll have to show you, then, I suppose." Her stomach did somersaults as he undid the top button of her flares with his long fingers, the smile on his face making him quite handsome.

----

Lily's eyes popped open at the loud sound.

"LILY!"

She stirred further at the angry sound coming from her bedroom door.

"Tuney?" she said sleepily.

"Open the door."

Lily glanced at Severus, who leapt up, gathered his clothes and dashed into the bathroom, leaving the door slightly ajar.

She tossed on jeans and her jumper, sans knickers, and opened the door.

Petunia's face was red, her hands on her bony hips. "Finally! What is wrong with you?"

Lily ignored the jibe and stepped out, shutting her bedroom door behind her. "I was asleep. What is it?"

"Your boyfriend is on the front step. Says he's been there for a while." Petunia turned and stomped toward her own room. "You better get rid of him."

Lily's heart was beating a mile a minute. She darted into her room, pausing at her loo first to whisper to Severus, "James is on the porch." She moved to her dresser trying to find a bra.

Severus replied, in a whisper too, "Are you going to talk to him?" His black eyes were narrowed.

"Of course."

"Why?" He sounded...surprisingly angry.

"He's been out there a while, Sev. He won't just go away." He seemed to ponder that, finally nodding.

"Be careful."

She glanced at him sharply. "What?"

"He's going to be upset, Lily." He moved to where she stood and wrapped her in his arms. "I'll be right here." And he leaned down to kiss her, his tongue immediately sliding between his lips.

---

She steeled herself as she reached her front door. With her hand on the knob, she breathed deeply and tried to be ready.

Stepping into the bright sunlight, Lily reeled slightly as her eyes adjusted. James was sitting on the steps, his back to her. She sat beside him, fighting the urge to touch him, comfort him. He looked truly bereft.

Without looking at her, he grabbed her and hugged her tightly. His voice was choked. "I was so worried."

She gently pushed him away. "I'm sorry. You didn't need to end your trip early..."

His eyes met hers then. They sparkled with unshed tears. Lily was shocked.

"So it's true?" He sounded both hurt and angry.

She just nodded.

He looked into the distance, his eyes narrowing behind his lenses.

"Why? I thought..." he ran his hand through his hair anxiously before placing his twitchy hand on her knee. "How can you just..." His hand became a fist and he pulled it back from her leg.

She was at a loss for words...and for whatever reason, her mind kept returning to the man in her bedroom.

"Who is it, Lily?" his voice was even and low. She held her breath.

"Does it matter, James?"

He winced as she said his name. He met her eyes again, his thick hands going to her shoulders. "Yes damn it. Of course! Who is my competition?" And he darted his head to meet her lips. When she gasped in surprise, he slid his tongue into her mouth. When she felt it slide against her own, she pushed at his chest. He pulled away, breaking the kiss, but kept his arms around her.

She couldn't help but give him a dirty look. She didn't feel danger with him like Severus had suggested. James was upset. He had been proclaiming his undying love for Lily for so long, she figured he might not deal well with losing her. She did feel bad...he was special.

She hugged him then and he crushed her with his hold, his face pressed against her hair. She tried to memorize the moment - how warm he was, the slight tremor in his arms, the clean, earthy smell of him.

She heard him whispering into her hair. When she finally made out the words, she started to push him away again.

"Please, Lily, please...I love you, I love you..."

He refused to let her go. Instead, his lips smashed against hers, causing her to gasp and a short yelp came from her.

"Move away from her, Potter."

Lily was released and she saw Severus standing over them, wand drawn and pointed at James, who - to his credit - appeared shocked, then sad, then angry.

"What the fuck?" Lily was startled by the venom in James' voice.

James backed away from the steps, his eyes on Severus, who stepped forward beside Lily. Not looking away from James, he offered his hand to her and when she took it, he pulled her to her feet and up against him, under his arm.

"Are you okay?" he said softly. Lily was mesmerized by the exchange between the two men. Severus' confidence was not something she could quite remember seeing before, especially in dealing with James. The fact that he hadn't already hexed him was saying a lot.

She managed a small "yes" and he squeezed her in response.

"I suggest you leave now, Potter." Severus' voice was even and confident. "You aren't wanted here."

Lily squirmed, wanting to disagree, but James was already at the fence. He looked livid. "You'll pay for this." And he disapparated.

Severus and Lily snuck back up to her room, shutting the door behind them, charming it so Petunia couldn't hear them or enter.

Lily turned to him, wringing her hands, eyes darting about. "I'm sorry."

He looked at her questioningly and put his long arms around her, pressing her face to his chest. "You did well. There was no easy way to handle that situation. Thank you." He paused. "You did kiss him back, though."

She sighed heavily. "He sort of ambushed me."

"Mmm, well, it will not do to have it happen again."

"Sev, are you jealous?"

He met her eyes. "Yes."

She wasn't quite sure of the appropriate response to that. Something sarcastic like "you're in trouble then!" Or "finally!" Instead, she smiled.

He stroked her hair and cheek and she turned to bring her lips to his. Between kisses, she said, "The-whole-time-I-thought-about-you."

He smiled under her lips and she couldn't help but reciprocate.

"You spoil me," she said.

His eyebrows lifted. "How?"

"I've never seen you smile so much."

At this, he scowled and she couldn't help but giggle. "There it is! The Severus Snape look!"

His scowl became a half smile. "Only for you."

"All right," she whispered, throwing her arms around him. "But I want to see it every day."

At this he smiled. "Deal."