Title: The other side of the barrier

Chapter 2 – Who am I?

Rising sun cast red light and the purple shadows of trees were dancing on snowy ground. Pale, strong hands were rested on stone balustrade, the tint of skin resembling snow below. Cold, freezing air stinging his lungs, the breath changing into small clouds of steam – he felt nothing else and it was a blessing itself. The cold... it had helped him so many times before, when the thoughts became unendurable, when the pain became too big, there was always the cold of Russian tundra, the cold of Russian winter.

Sometimes there were thoughts that he was devoid of feelings... That he couldn't feel anything. But then, the cold reminded him that it wasn't true. Despite his phoenix soul, he craved for cold, which could temper his "negative" attitude. The crimson eyes closed while the rose lips opened to take last deep breath of icy air. Turning back he left the snowy sight, entering warmer territory in the form of his room. His eyes deliberately avoided the covered frame of picture standing against the wall. The nagging question, "Who are you?" was echoing inside his head, making him even more irritated. The day wasn't going to be the nicest one. Not to mention that he didn't get too much sleep this night, even if he usually had hard nights. When he had woken up later than normally this morning, he had felt as if his body was made of stone and it had taken him long time to move his limbs. He tried not to think about the Chinese boy, explaining to himself that the weirdness of yesterday event was caused by tiredness.

He put on black sweater and dark blue pants and left the room, heading towards the kitchen. Preparing himself a bowl of carrels, he thought about the upcoming meeting in Pushkin Museum and his daily tasks. The vision of ebony haired boy was haunting him from time to time, which disturbed his trail of thoughts. He woke up from his reverie when Bryan entered the kitchen, holding a folder with files under his arm.

'Here you are. All files from yesterday tender,' he said, passing the black folder to smaller man. The lilac eyes scanned his former captain and the bushy brow arched a bit, noticing ineffectively hidden discomfort on pale face.

'Bad sleep?' he dared to ask, smirking and turning to fridge to make his own breakfast.

'Hn.'

'How is the case with Kablukov?' Bryan continued, not alienated by Kai's usual lack of talkativeness.

'Do not mention this bastard...'

'Then why don't you refuse to his offer?'

'I can't...' Kai answered resting his head on his hand. 'He is our representative in Duma. If I refuse, he'll start a campaign against us.'

'Then, give him something which was found far away from Moscow.'

'No, it won't help. He knows the subject through and through.'

The silence, which had fallen after this statement, was broken by the redhead. He entered the kitchen with a smug smile and took look on his two friends.

'Why are you so gloomy?' he asked them and then approached Bryan, taking him by his hand. 'Today is a happy day.'

Kai raised his brow questioningly at this. It wasn't every day that the red devil was so excited. Besides, such attitude was quite unnerving for him because of his own mood.

'Have you forgot?' Tala asked, seeing Kai's questioning eyes. 'Today is our anniversary. We're going out for a whole day.'

How could he forgot... Tala had been gibbering about this oh-so-special day for weeks. Well, at least those two could be happy. He observed as the lovers left the kitchen, Bryan's arm embracing the redhead's slim figure. Sighing, he turned back to his abandoned breakfast when suddenly the words "Who are you?" reverberated inside his mind.

'I must be crazy...'

The smell of newly brewed cafe mixed with cologne slightly intoxicated him. From time to time the odor of cigarettes was coming through the closed doors, teasing his nose. It was as usual – tens of suits, clean-shaven faces, and bored eyes. Another pointless meeting. Why he even was here? Because he had to? Or maybe because he hadn't anything batter to do? Who he was for those men? An heir of mighty Voltaire, the late head of the biggest company in Russia or a young, new, prosperous businessman? Those questions always appeared in his mind when he was forced to attend such meetings. Sudden silence stopped his trail of thoughts, signaling that it was his turn to speak. He slowly stood up, dragging his glare over listeners. While he spoke, his fairy eyes observed the other men, noticing their half-interested expressions. He knew that most of them wanted to be in any other place now, some thinking about their children, wives or lovers, others dreaming about some entertainment or concentrating more on upcoming tasks.

The end of his speech was welcomed by a short applause and a few questions. He was answering them like some kind of machine, his mind mostly occupied with thoughts far from the meeting's topic.

'Of course I'm sure. Out system has been developed by the best programmers and its originator is our computing mastermind, who has been educated in the best Russian institute, as well as the other best specialists we have. This secure system is unfailing.'

He answered to one of the questions. And it was true. His friends were the best specialists he employed and he trusted them with his own life. They all had been trained in the Abbey and every one had their own special skills and experience. Tala, as he mentioned on the meeting, had a knack for computers, maybe because of his past experiences with cyborg issue. Bryan was his man in all kind of discussions and negotiations since his "talent" of argumentation was irreplaceable. Spencer was engaged in petrol industry on Siberia, controlling Hiwatari's deposits, whereas Ian worked as a controller, very reliable one, in all sectors of the company.

Sometimes he wondered why he had decided to try. Try to make the opinion of his grandfather's company more positive. Try to work for Hiwatari's fame. Try to forget about Voltaire and his devil plans. Try to...

'Whatever.' he thought, shaking hand with the last man and heading out of the Pushkin Museum to his red Ferrari 550 Maranello. Resting his head on the steering wheel, he felt that he needed to clear his tired mind out of the excess of thoughts. Pressing the gas pedal Kai quickly left the edifice of the museum. After a short ride he was walking down the Arbat Street, thousands of busy people passing him, the groups of tourists visible here and there. Colorful shop windows tempted the eyes of passer-byes, making a nice, vivid difference to dull pavements, covered with dirty, melting snow. Dark, snowy clouds gathering over the city didn't help more.

While walking aimlessly he felt a familiar scent, which brought surprisingly good memories. Passing a cake shop, Kai inhaled the air, feeling the warmth of loving home he had never had, seeing inwardly smiling faces of his parents, remembering the taste of the rare apple cakes he got while being in the Abbey. The visions slowly changed, bringing an imagination of far-away lands, oriental symbols and vivid colors, which emitted the warmth he had never known and subconsciously craved for. Slowly walking away from the source of cinnamon smell, he returned to considering the potential answer for the question he had heard last night.

Who he really was? Kai Hiwatari – but it didn't tell anything. What else he could say about himself... He had a few friends, but they would live evenly happy without him. He had a noble surname, but he detested it. He had an eventful past, but he wished he could forget it. He was just a wreck of man.

Another scent reached his nostrils, bringing the feeling of uneasiness. The white carnation in his hand, its green steam contrasting with white snow below, his trembling hand in black glove holding that lonely carnation, fairy eyes staring at the person before him, the words of refusal still reverberating in his ears, the feeling as if his heart stopped – the past started its attack, using the pictures he tried so hard to forget. He shook his head and quickened step, running away from the fragrance of the florist's, running away from the weakness.

The silk curtain smoothly fell down, revealing the black background. He lowered his gaze, looking for a person who should be sleeping on the paining, but wasn't. The boy was sitting with his legs and arms crossed, the black bangs hiding his face from Kai's sight. It didn't take long time for him to notice the Russian man in front of the painting.

'Who are you?' he repeated his question, while standing up gracefully.

'I... I'm a wreck of a man...' Kai answered in a soft voice, half-conscious of his own words. He didn't mean to tell it aloud and admit his weakness, but something unknown made him to do this.

'I can help you,' the boy said softly, his pearly voice slightly muffled by the glass, which separated the canvas from Kai. 'But first, you need to help me.'

'What should I do? How can I help you out?' Kai asked, not entirely believing what he saw and heard. When he finally had returned home, he had enough of annoying memories and doubts. He had to know what was on that picture and if it was true. That's why he decided to look under the curtain and check the image of Chinese.

'I can be freed only if you want it with all you heart.' the boy continued, his amazingly gold eyes focused on the slate haired man. But I will go back to this frame unless we both are entirely happy.'

'Happy?' Kai thought doubtfully, not believing in such possibility. 'How do you know that I'll want to help you.' he asked, crossing his arms. This whole conversation slowly appeared pointless for him. The Chinese lowered his head.

'I don't know this...' he said, somehow saddened. 'But maybe you are curious and have some questions I can answer...'

'Of course I have...' Kai said inwardly. 'So tell me...'

A/N: I know I know, this chapter is a bit too descriptive and there is no action, especially between Rei and Kai. But I promise that next chapter will finally bring some revelations between those two. So please be patient and wait for the next update. Since then, please write me some reviews :)

Oh, and sorry for long updates, but right know I'm quite busy with waiting for enrolment results at the Universities and taking care of all things needed.