Disclaimer - The rights of Total Drama Island and its characters belong to Teletoon, Cartoon Network, and all those associated with the show. No profit is being made by this fanfiction. Any spelling or grammar errors in this story are not endorsed, encouraged, or enforced by this fanfiction.
Replies to Questions and Comments:
To Everybody - I miss Tyler too. Oh, and you Ezekiel x Bridgette fans will be pleased to hear I finally thought of a short story for them! The reason I hesitated was because I wanted something original, and I didn't want one of the stereotypical ways to "get rid" of Geoff (ex.: being a jerk, dying, becoming a vampire). Hopefully, it will be out before Christmas Day.
And now, without further stalling, on with the show!!
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(narrated by Chris Maclean)
Welcome to Total Drama Comeback...
An awesome strikers game took place, with a metal ball, craniums, and electric walls! Much pain and madness ensued as the Red Team and Green Team battered each other around like rag dolls!
As the voted off campers and a great deal of people watched the sports games, many exciting events happened! Heather took a ball to the head by Ezekiel, leaving her as loopy as a jay bird! Harold managed to regain all feeling in his legs, and walked the field to help his team win! Tyler and Izzy both messed up big time, accidentally causing the victory to go to their opponents' team!
After an intense marshmallow ceremony, Tyler was voted off. While depressed and upset, he managed to get his spirit back when the crowd give him a rousing cheer, and he was reunited with his super hot girlfriend, Lindsay. Lucky sod.
But now the competition is at it's white-hottest, because after this, it's going to be a massive free-for-all! After this, the Final Ten will be a wild, rocking party! The ratings will rise, the turn will tide, and we'll soon be cheering for our favorite of the Top Three, on which two contestants will win ten thousand dollars!
Who is going to be voted off of the eleven remaining campers:
Insane Izzy...
CIT Courtney...
Hellish Heather...
Enraged Eva...
Cool Cody...
Energetic Ezekiel...
Benevolent Beth...
Nimble-Witted Noah...
Hilarious Harold...
Graceful Gwen...
or Bodacious Bridgette?
Here's a hint: it might not be who you want it to be! Ehehehe...
So sit back, get some food ready, and be prepared for one of the best series of challenges yet... on Total... Drama ... COMEBACK!
(cue the theme song, and we're good to go!)
Chapter 35 (Day 12, Part 1) - You Did WHAT For Ten Thousand Bucks?!
Gwen and Bridgette sat together on the grass, back against back. Both had their eyes closed, sitting cross-legged with the backs of their hands on their knees.
"Are you sure this is supposed to help with stress?" Gwen asked.
"Gwen, shhhh. You don't talk during meditation."
Silence followed, then the goth started to wrinkle her nose.
"What do I do if I have an itch?"
"Try to ignore it."
"But it's on my nose... gah!"
The goth scratched and rubbed her nose after a few seconds of trying to resist it. The blond surfer sighed and turned around to her friend. "You're not trying hard enough, Gwen."
"Well, maybe I'm not cut out for this kind of stuff," she replied, still rubbing her nose. "I don't think meditation can help me with my nerves."
"It is worth a shot. Your nerves have been rather frayed these days."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Remember breakfast?"
(Breakfast, as remembered.)
Gwen looked at the glop Chef Hatchet had served her. "I may be mistaken," she said, "but the meat in hamburgers is not supposed to be half-liquid."
"It's called a Sloppy Joe for a reason, Grim Girl," Chef barked at her, then he yelled so hard it blew her hair back, "GOT THAT?!"
"No, sir!"
"Honestly Gwen, quit complaining," Courtney, the next in line, replied. "And why do you insist on ragging to Chef? Is your memory that bad that you cannot remember he doesn't like criticism?"
With a twitching eye, Gwen took her hamburger bun with the runny meat on it and smeared it in Courtney's face. As most of the campers and Courtney gasped, the brunette CIT grabbed the bowl that Chef had been scooping the hamburger from and pitched it at Gwen. The goth girl ducked and it splashed all over Izzy.
"Oh no you didn't," the redhead snarled, and chucked her hamburger at Courtney. Before long, a massive food fight broke out; Noah and Beth crawled out the back as the carnage raged.
"She was asking for a little meat on her bones," Gwen remarked, smirking wickedly at the memory.
"You cannot be feuding with Courtney and Heather at the same time," her friend continued, turning to face her. "It'll give you a lot of stress, not to mention you..."
She strayed off the sentence, looking away again. "What?" Gwen asked. "What might I do?"
"Nothing. Never mi-"
"I might do something I'll regret. Was that it?"
Bridgette sighed, then nodded. "Yes, it was. It's what happened to Courtney, I don't want it to happen to you."
Gwen shrugged, then leaned back against Bridgette. "You're too nervous, you know that, Bridge? Though I loathe to say this, it's serious competition now. Trust me, though, I know the difference between letting off steam, and nearly crippling someone."
Bridgette sighed again, lost in thought. They stayed like that for some time, listening to each other breathe.
It was rudely interrupted when Chris came by in his rather loud kart. "Hey ladies," he shouted as he stopped next to them, "it's time for the final challenge before the Final Ten! C'mon!"
The two sighed and grudgingly stood up. "Where is it, anyway?" Bridgette asked.
"At the talent show stage, so hurry on up; everyone else is there."
"Can you give us a lift, then?"
"Nope!"
And his trademark, evil grin, Chris sped off, leaving them in a cloud of smog and dust. After coughing and hacking, the two girls glared at the departing kart.
"I really hate that man," Gwen said.
When the two made it to the talent stage, they were surprised by how it had changed. The curtains and the backdrop were a pure white, and on both sides there was a long, game show table. Seated at the left table was Ezekiel (who waved at the two girls), Eva, Courtney, and Harold. On the right side were Noah (reading), Izzy, Cody (who grinned at the girls), Beth, and Heather.
Gwen approached Chris, who was standing in the center of the stage. "So which side do we sit on?"
"Can't you tell?" the host asked. "You're going to be sitting with your former teammates! It's a old-fashioned Screaming Gophers verses Killer Bass!"
Some of the campers let out cheers and battle cries with Chris. Gwen and Bridgette shrugged, exchanged a farewell wave, then went to sit with their teammates.
"We hope you've been enjoying being on teams, but after this challenge, most of the following challenges will be on your own," the handsome host informed them. "How does that make you feel? Does that bug you? Does it bug you, I'm not even touching you!"
(Confession Cam - A quick recap of feelings, nothing more than feelings.)
Ezekiel - "I really have enjoyed myself, despite times where I was in pain and/or possibly going to be killed, eh. I mean, I've made some great friends, I got this far in the show, I got to kiss a couple girls, and... well, I guess there's the satisfaction that I proved to the world that I changed, eh."
Noah - "So it's almost the Final Ten, huh? I knew I could make it this far, I have the intellect. Still, it would have been nicer if Katie was here, and some more people who weren't uptight, angry, mean-spirited... never mind. You get the gist."
Beth - "It'sth THO good to be thith far! I really think I have a shot at thith! All I have to do ith keep giving it my all, and I'll be winning it all!" \She giggles and snorts.\
Heather - "It's rather annoying how much this season hasn't gone to plan like last time. It's all Ezekiel's fault, really. That twerp can't hold on much longer, how many skills could a home schooled kid have?" \She looks to the side and trails off.\ "Though... he has proved more talented than I thought... I MEAN NO! No no no no no no no-"
Courtney - "I've really had enough drama here, and I want all that put behind me. I mean, Harold's forgiven me, why can't Gwen let it go? The girl's like Eva, minus the muscles. ... But besides her, I want to carry on this game as far as I can. Duncan, if you're watching this, I want to let you know that I'm carrying on for you too! You can get half of my winnings, if you promise not to be an ogre!"
Izzy - "Izzy's gonna be queen! Yeah, Queen Izzy, that sounds good! Hail to the Queen, honey!"
"Welcome, ladies and gentlemen," Chris shouted, "to the best challenge you've ever seen! In a combination of Triple Dog Dare, and many challenges that wouldn't be long enough for a real episode-length of fun, we got this incredible challenge of..."
A neon sign dropped down in front of the backdrop, a chilling '13' that had a dripping blood animation. "The Screams of the Thirteen!!"
Owen, dressed in a black suit, and Chef, dressed in a pink dress, posed on the sides, gesturing up at the sign. They let out fake, terrified screams, waving their fingers at the camera.
Many campers' eyes rolled. Chris stepped to the backdrop, and pulled a large spinner. On the spinner were the faces of Owen, Sadie, Geoff, Leshawna, Justin, Lindsay, DJ, Trent, Katie, Duncan, Tyler, Chef, and Joel.
"From the devious minds of our booted campers, our beloved cook, and our special guest star," the host shouted, waving his hand at the giant spinner, "we have contrived some of the greatest stunts, dares, gross-out ideas, and challenges!"
"How is this any different than Triple Dog Dare?" Heather shouted, slamming her fists on the table.
"Bad memories, huh?" Gwen asked, grinning sadistically at Heather. The queen bee glared at the goth girl, but it didn't faze Gwen.
"Because these aren't dares you have to take to stay in the game," Chris explained. "This time around, there are two teams! One will be chosen from both teams, the challenge will then be selected, and whoever outperforms the other wins a point for their team!
"The first team to get best out of twenty-five, aka thirteen points, wins the match! The losing team sends someone home, though who... may be an unexpected twist!"
(Confession Cam - An expected twist?)
Harold - "Yes! I can so get behind this kind of challenge! Now that I'm walking, yes indeed, and I'm taking this game today!"
Gwen - \glaring angrily\ "Okay, I didn't want to complain with Heather nearby, but this is way too much like Triple Dog Dare. And some of the things the people here thought of... kissing a dead fish, drinking from the toilet, watching Owen eat dog food... oh no, Owen got to add his own challenges?!" \She screams in frustration.\
Cody - "I wonder what he meant by that 'unexpected twist'..."
Bridgette - "Aw great. I'm the one with a strong gag reflex."
Eva - "Hehehe. These weaklings don't stand a chance."
"Now because we can have twenty-five challenges total," Chris continued to explain the rules, "we won't have any camper ever face someone a second time! So using the control panel on your team's table, you'll select the person who'll be facing the opponent from the other team.
"The Killer Bass team has five members, so each member will, at most, be facing five different opponents. Are you people ready?"
Owen and Chef threw their hands up in the air and cheered like an overly excited audience. Some of the campers cheered along with them, some did not; in fact, those that didn't looked like they'd rather cheer for the apocalypse.
"Then here...," Chris shouted, grabbing the arrow of the giant spinner "we...," he spun it, "GOOOOOOO!"
The arrow twirled around, and everyone watched with baited breath.
"Please not Owen, please not Owen," Heather chanted.
"Duncan can think of really nasty dares," Bridgette whimpered.
"Chef Hatchet means death," Ezekiel muttered.
Fortunately for all of them, it landed on Sadie. Letting out sighs of relief, the campers set to picking their choices.
It ended up being Harold and Gwen. The two exchanged determined glances before Chris read aloud from a note card.
"Spinning Cups," he announced.
A couple trapdoors opened on the stage, dropping Gwen and Harold down. Up rose two giant cups, containing the two campers.
"Sadie said the first one to stand up or if their opponent pukes, you win," Chris shouted, pushing a button on his podium.
"This cannot be goo-oooooo-waaaaaaaaaa," Gwen started before the cup she was in began to spin at an incredible speed. Soon, her cup and and Harold's were spinning at an alarming rate, the two campers only blurs. Their teammates watched in horror, some feeling sorry for the two and all glad it wasn't them.
When the spinning stopped, the cups tipped over, spilling the two campers out. Gwen kept trying to stand up, but fell over every attempt. Harold lay there, moaning and rolling his head around.
"C'mon, one of you stand," Chris said, tapping his foot. "First to stand is considered the win-"
Harold, who had only managed to make it to his hands and knees, threw up. He shook violently on all fours as Chris tsk'tsked. "Shame, Harold. Guess Gwen wins."
Immediately after he said this, Gwen puked. The goth girl was on her knees, heaving and panting.
"This is quite nice to watch now," Heather said, a mean grin spreading across her face. "I'm sure Trent and Leshawna are going to be so happy to see you two when you're reunited."
Gwen glared at her through heavy eyes, but Harold was too weak to glare.
(Confession Cam - Shaken and stirred.)
Gwen - "Thank you so much, Sadie. Jeez, I couldn't stop that spinning effect for what felt like forever."
"Point One goes to the Screaming Gophers," Chris declared.
The six campers cheered, though Gwen was lying her face on the table as Cody rubbed her back.
"Let's spin that spinner again!"
It landed on DJ, and the two chosen campers were Bridgette and Beth. The farm girl forgot about the competition as she waved at the blond surfer.
"Good luck, Bridge."
"You too, Beth."
"Stop wishing her luck," Heather shouted, "and trample her, Beth!!"
"Fitting words, Heather, for the next challenge, courtesy of our gentle giant DJ, is Treadmills!"
The trapdoors opened again, and two long treadmills were raised onto the stage. Beth and Bridgette got on one individually, and looked over at Chris for instructions.
"First one to fall off loses! And watch out," the sadistic host said as he pushed a button on his podium, "for they speed up over time!"
The treadmills started up at a jogging pace, and Bridgette and Beth began to run on the moving treads. Beth's little legs were pumping soon, and Heather began laughing.
"Look at Beth go," she said, still grinning meanly, "she looks like a two year old still learning to walk."
"Shut up, Heather," Beth shouted, running faster as the treadmills picked up.
Soon, the treadmills were moving insanely fast, smoke coming from the rollers. Beth and Bridgette were running for their lives, sweating and panting.
Bridgette fouled up first, tripping over her feet. She landed on the tread and was launched off like a rocket, shooting back behind the back drop. Many crashing sounds could be heard from backstage.
"And Beth wins," Chris declared, pushing a button that slowed down the treadmills, allowing the exhausted Beth to fall down and gasp for air.
Ezekiel and Courtney had run backstage when their friend had been shot back there. They found her under a mess of stage equipment, bruised and tousled.
"Ouch," she muttered as they helped her to her feet.
(Confession Cam - Dread the treadmills.)
Bridgette - "Well, that hurt. A lot. Bet Chris really enjoys this. I cannot understand how someone can enjoy seeing people hurt themselves a lot."
"It's two-nothing Screaming Gophers, and we got a lot more wild challenges," Chris announced, chuckling as he watched Bridgette collapse in her seat. "Let's see if the Killer Bass can make a comeback! Your next challenge comes from..."
After an arrow spin, he shouted, "Tyler! Let's see what the jock wants you to do!"
The two chosen campers were Eva and Cody. The tech-geek grinned at the fitness buff, wiggling his eyebrows; she snarled at him and looked away.
"Your challenge is... Tug O' War!"
Cody blanched. Eva grinned sinisterly.
"Here's the rope," Chris said as Chef handed an end of a long rope to each of them, "here's the boundary," he said as he spread black tape on the stage between them, "and... PULL!"
Eva, with one hand, yanked the rope. The tech-geek was sent flying off his feet, flying past the fitness buff, and crashed on top of the Killer Bass table. Cody, stunned by his sudden launch, shook his head, then realized his face was millimeters from Courtney's face; their lips were almost touching.
"EWWWWW," Courtney reacted, shoving herself away from the table so hard that her chair tipped over and she fell to the ground. "You tried to kiss me, you little twerp!"
"Um, I doo'nt think he meant for that to happen, eh," Ezekiel replied.
Cody, red-faced and wide-eyed, walked back to his team in shame. He had to walk by a smirking Eva, and sit in-between a laughing Gwen and cackling Izzy.
"That's," Chris tried to talk, but was laughing too hard to form a sentence, "the Killer... Bass's-hehehehe... first p-point!"
(Confession Cam - Tug O' War is hell.)
Eva - \chuckling to himself\ "It's so funny how that geek keeps getting humiliated. But it's going to be tragic when Duncan gets his hands on him. Tragically funny."
The next arrow spin landed on Trent's. Courtney, still fuming over Cody having come close to kissing her, and Izzy were chosen.
"Next is the Freezing Water Balloons by our favorite musician," Chris announced. Owen came up to Courtney and Izzy, handing them each a large water balloon. "You will stand back-to-back, take ten paces, then fling your water balloon!
"And you might not want to get hit, because that water is only a few degrees from freezing point!"
Courtney looked quite nervous, and Izzy looked excited. Facing back-to-back, they started to walk to Chef Hatchet's count.
"7... 8...," the large cook counted loudly, "9... 10, THROW 'EM!!"
Courtney spun around, cocked her arm, and was hit square in the face with Izzy's water balloon. Soaked in cold water, she cried out and dropped her water balloon on her feet. Now wet all over with freezing water down her front and her legs, she shiver-stomped back to her seat.
"And Izzy wins the third point for the Screaming Gophers," Chris announced, clapping as the redhead skipped back to her seat.
"I...," Courtney stammered, huddled up in her seat and shivering, "h-h-hate that g-girl."
"She's got a good arm," Eva commented, raising an eyebrow. Courtney tried to glare at her, but sneezed violently.
"The next challenge," Chris said as he spun the arrow, "is... Owen's!"
The large teenager let out a whooping cheer, pumping his fists into the air and laughing. Ezekiel and Noah were chosen, and both kept looking at Owen worriedly.
"It's time for... Slugs in Mouth!"
The two boys' eyes bulged and they exchanged glances. "Oh," Noah said, turning back to his team's table, "hell no!"
He tried to get back to his seat, but Heather and Izzy shoved him back into place. "I'm not putting a slug in my mouth," he shouted. "I have allergies! To slimy things! And wriggling things! And things that French people eat!"
Ezekiel watched, smiling and shrugging. As Owen presented a plate covered with crawling slugs, the prairie boy plucked one off the plate.
"Don't swallow the little guy now," Owen instructed him.
"Doo'nt worry, I woo'nt," he replied, then placed the slug in his mouth. His face immediately contorted, and he spat the slug out on the stage floor.
"Oh, and Ezekiel has already lost," Chris declared, shaking his head.
Heather and Izzy, who were holding Noah down to the ground and were dangling a slug down his mouth, stopped inches before dropping it in. The egghead let out a relieved sigh and scurried back to his seat.
"It's four-one Screaming Gophers," the handsome host remarked, watching Ezekiel spit and hack. "Better get cracking, Killer Bass."
"Way to go, Zeke," Courtney said, glaring at the prairie boy. "You blew the challenge before it actually began."
"Oh, you're one to talk," he shot back, glaring at her from under his toque, "you were defeated by Izzy in the blink of an eye, eh."
"At least I tried!"
"Knock if off, you two," Harold said to them. Courtney and Ezekiel scoffed and looked away from each other.
(Confession Cam - Freezing slugs would taste worse, right?)
Ezekiel - "She's got a lot of nerve, acting like I did the worst 'oot there, eh!" \He stops, then scratches the back of his head.\ "Well... I kind of did, didn't I? Whoops."
Courtney - "Look, it's really simple. Zeke blew it because he personally failed the challenge. I was defeated, so it was because of someone else I lost. That's how it works, those are the unspoken rules. And furthermore..."
\She goes on like this for some time.\
"Let's see who's sick challenge is next," Chris declared, spinning the arrow for the sixth time. "Okay, it's... Katie's!"
Courtney and Heather were chosen, and the two former allies stared at each other.
"The challenge is Who's the Phone For," their host said, pushing one of the many buttons on his podium.
One of the trapdoors opened up, and a phone on a pedestal raised up onto the stage. Immediately after it raised up, the phone began to ring; it was an old-fashioned phone, the kind of ringing that sends shivers down your spine.
Most of the campers sighed, waiting for someone to answer it. Heather and Courtney glanced at each other, then at the phone, then at Chris.
"The rules of this one," he said, speaking in-between the shrill rings of the phone, "are unclear, so you two... might have to answer the phone first... or not at all! Think you can guess which you're... not supposed to do?"
The two leading ladies exchanged another glance. "Could be important," Heather said to the CIT.
"Could be a trap," Courtney said to the queen bee.
The ringing continued for about five minutes, and some of the campers were starting to lose it. Izzy wailed as she pounded on the table, screaming in what sounded like terrible suffering.
"Answer it, answer it, I beg of you," she shrieked. "Don't you know that listening to a phone for an indefinite period of time can cause your eardrums to bleed out?"
"Stop it, stop it, leave us alone," Ezekiel whimpered, shivering in his seat. "I cannot stand it, answer the pho-oooooone!"
"I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die," Beth chanted, staring down at her feet. "I wanna die at thith point, I wanna die."
"Answer the phone, answer the phone, I beg of you," Harold yelled. "I don't care if it's the Grim Reaper calling to set an appointment, answer it! Idiots!!"
Courtney and Heather looked just as bad. The queen bee's hair was starting to stick out in stress, and the CIT was wringing her hands and sweating bullets. Both too nervous to answer it, the phone continued to ring for twenty more minutes.
After about a half-hour of this, Courtney couldn't take it anymore. She picked up the phone and put it to her ear. "He-"
She never got to "-llo," because Chef Hatchet, the one calling from another phone, blew an air horn into the speaking end. The CIT shrieked in pain and threw the receiver away, hitting Chris in the temple.
"Ow," they both screamed.
"You jerks, you could have caused permanent damage," Courtney shouted.
"You hit me in the head," Chris countered, rubbing the bruise that was forming.
"What?" the CIT asked, rubbing the ear she had put against the phone receiver.
Chef Hatchet returned to the stage and began to shove Courtney back to her seat. "You lose, freckle face, now sit down."
(Confession Cam - Can you not hear me now?)

Courtney - \still yelling, because she's half-deaf currently\ "Katie, you moron, how could you think of such a dangerous stunt? I could have lost my hearing completely! And also..."
\She goes on again for quite a while.\
"It's five-one Screaming Gophers, and looking really bad on the Killer Bass's part," Chris said, grimacing as Chef put a bandage on the bump that had grown where Courtney accidentally hit him with the phone.
"The next challenge is... Justin's! Teams, pick your teammate for who takes the handsome man's dare!"
"WHAT?" Courtney asked, cupping her good ear. Her teammates winced, then repeated what Chris said to her. Ezekiel was picked for the Killer Bass, Cody for the Screaming Gophers.
"Justin has created... the Coffee Chug!"
Two pedestals raised up from the trapdoors, an full urn of coffee and a coffee mug on both. Chris cackled as he waved a hand over one, swishing the hot, muggy steam over it.
"First one to finish this hot coffee urn wins," Chris told them. "Think you can do it?"
Cody poured himself a mug full, then sipped at it. "Oh wow, that's hot," he commented, clutching his mouth. "I think I can do it after a minute or so..."
He stopped when he saw Ezekiel pick up the urn by the handle, and started to pour it into his mouth directly. Cody's jaw dropped, as did several other jaws as Ezekiel chugged down the entire pot of coffee; even Chris and Chef looked greatly astonished, and Owen had an excited smile on his face.
After finishing the last drop, Ezekiel wiped his mouth with his sleeve. "What?" he asked when he saw the startled looks of the others, "How else do you think I stayed up all night studying at home, eh?"
"Um, Zeke wins," Chris said, recovering with his handsome grin. The Killer Bass all cheered, Bridgette and Harold high-fiving the home schooled boy.
"Gee, doesn't that have a bad effect on you?" Bridgette asked him.
"No, not really, eh," he said, his left eye twitching slightly.
"It's five-two now, and the next challenge comes from... Chef Hatchet!"
The campers all gasped as the cook cackled, eyeing them evilly. They all did rock-paper-scissors to see who'd go, and thus Harold and a very distraught Noah took to center stage.
"The challenge is... Brain Munch!"
The two pedestals lowered, then came back up with a tray on both, a human-sized brain on each.
"A generous college donated two brains for this challenge," Chris explained, "and the first one to eat a brain wins!"
"Oh no," Noah stammered, taking several steps back. "No no no... this is destroying what is most dear to me... no no no no... nooooo-aaaaaaaaaaaah!"
He took off running, screaming with his hands up in the air. The Screaming Gophers slapped their foreheads. Harold poked at the brain, and looked over at Chris. "These real brains, Chris?"
"Yeah, but it doesn't matter now, Noah's retreated and forfeited," Chris remarked, pointing at the fleeing egghead with Chef Hatchet chasing after him.
"He runs like a girl," Eva remarked, smirking.
Ezekiel looked over at her, clearly upset if it wasn't for his twitching eye.
(Confession Cam - This is your brain on coffee.)
Ezekiel - "Eva was furious at me the first day of Total Drama Island for what I said a'boot girls, then she goes and makes a crack at how girls run? Stupid doo'bul standards."
Courtney - \She's still going on.\ "... and I'm quite glad Ezekiel beat that scrawny geek, because he tried to kiss me, which I'd never do because..." \And on and on...\
"This sure is a fun contest, isn't it?" Chris remarked, grinning at the Screaming Gophers. Noah was being dragged back to his seat, on his back, by Chef Hatchet; neither looked very happy about this.
"It's five-three Screaming Gophers, now let's have some more revolting fun," the host said as he spun the arrow. "It's time for a challenge from... Geoff!"
"Woohoo, my handsome honey," Bridgette cheered. "Let's see what he's got!"
As it turned out, she was picked by her team, and Gwen was picked for the Screaming Gophers. The two friends exchanged a smile before the goth girl said, "I hope your boyfriend wasn't feeling sadistic, Bridge."
"I sure hope so too."
"Oh-ho, you two ladies are in for a real treat," Chris said, holding back some evil laughter. "This one is called Owen's Outhouse!"
Bridgette and Gwen paled (well, Bridgette did, Gwen just turned a little whiter). When an outhouse was wheeled onto the stage, both lost all remaining color in their face.
"You ready, Owen?" Chris asked his large intern.
"You bet, Chris! I've been holding this in all day," the giant teen shouted, rushing for the outhouse. "Man, that Mexican food I had for breakfast has been acting up all day!"
He slammed the door behind him, and many revolting sounds ensued. Hearing those, Owen's groaning, and loud farts, Gwen and Bridgette grabbed hold of each other in fear. Cody, who had also paled, fainted dead away. Beth crossed herself, and Harold started to gag.
"Now after Owen is done, you two will be going in there. Whoever leaves first loses."
"WE'RE NOT GOING," the two girls screamed.
"Oh, yes you are," Chef Hatchet growled. He picked Gwen and Bridgette up from behind by their shirt collars, keeping them suspended in air as they kicked and fought.
Owen finally stepped out, letting out an enormous sigh of relief. "That was a large load off," he said, then tapped his chin. "Or is it, load out? I don't know bathroom lingo that well, to be honest, sorry."
Bridgette and Gwen, thrashing and screaming, were pushed into the stinking outhouse by Chef Hatchet. The conscious campers watched in silent horror, and after a few seconds, they strained to hear any sounds of life.
"You're enjoying this, aren't you, Chris?" Harold snapped.
"Um, no, actually," the host replied, looking sick to his stomach. "This time, I think this is too terrible."
"I'm enjoying it," Heather said, grinning as she watched the outhouse, "because it's right where Gwen deserves to be."
Courtney nodded feebly. Ezekiel noticed and glared at her, and the CIT quickly added, "But I feel really bad for Bridgette!"
As if on cue, Bridgette burst out of the outhouse, gasping for air. Running away from the near-toxic smell, she didn't even make it off the stage before she fell on her hands and knees, vomiting hard.
Gwen, green in her normally white face, almost fell out of the outhouse, made it a few steps, then passed out. Heather grinned as Beth and a recently Cody ran over to help her.
Bridgette continued to puke, as Chris watched with a queasy look. "Um, Chef bra? Go get a mop."
"Okay."
"... A really big mop, she's heaving a lot."
(Confession Cam - We sincerely hope you weren't eating.)
Gwen - \furious\ "I blame Courtney for this. She had Geoff voted off third, he must have really wanted revenge."
Bridgette - \still looking sickly\ "... I... I really hate this show. I'm either puking or stinking or screaming... oh, no... BLEARGH!" \She pukes on the floor of the confession outhouse, then wipes her mouth.\ "... Great, I just did all three at once."
"Well... ugg," Chris said, waving a paper fan in front of his face, "man, Bridgette, what did you eat for breakfast, you've got some really foul puke."
Bridgette lay slumped in her seat against the Killer Bass table, Ezekiel rubbing her back. The surfer moaned every now and then, to signify she was still alive.
"What did she eat?" Gwen spat out, hammering her fists on the table. "What did Owen eat?!"
"Mexican," Owen informed her.
"Was it with stink bombs and skunk juice?!"
"Alright, stop your complaining," Chris said, continuing to wave the fan in front of him. "We've got more challenges to do, and the score is now six-three Screaming Gophers." He spun the roulette arrow as hard as he could, and it landed on Leshawna.
"Ooo, it's my honey now," Harold declared, pumping his fists into the air.
"Better not do it, then," Eva remarked. "Look what Bridgette's honey did to her."
Sure enough, Eva took the challenge instead of Harold, and Beth was picked for the Screaming Gophers. She waved at the fitness buff, who gave a small wave back.
"This challenge from our street sister is the Soda Machine Shake," Chris informed them. As he spoke, the trapdoors opened as two large soda machines raised up on the stage. "There's a soda, paid for in full, stuck in the machine. First one to shake it loose wins!"
(Confession Cam - We interrupt for ruptin' sake.)
Chef Hatchet - "I have been asked to read this message by Leshawna." \He gets out a note card and reads it, stilted.\ " 'Please do not, under any circumstances, shake a soda or candy machine. It will fall on you and crush you, and you will die a stupid fool. Please do not die as stupid fools'."
Beth started kicking the soda machine, then tackled. "Sthtupid sthoda machine, gimme my sthoda," she shouted.
Eva watched her, then tapped her soda machine. Courtney watched this, and got impatient. "Eva, what are you waiting for?" she shouted.
"I thought I'd give her a head start."
"We're losing this contest, damn it! Pick up that soda machine and shake every soda loose if need be!"
The fitness buff took a deep breath. She hated being told what to do more than anything, but Courtney spoke the truth here. The fitness buff lifted the soda machine up, tilted it forty-five degrees, and shook it vigorously. A soda clanked in the bottom slot, and she set it down.
"Eva wins for the Killer Bass," Chris announced.
"Sorry about that, short stuff," Eva said as she plucked the soda out of the slot. She opened it, and it sprayed all over her face.
Beth clapped her hands over her mouth and doubled over, very muffled laughter barely escaping.
"Don't laugh," Eva warned her. The farm girl nodded, and held her mouth closed tighter. She started to turn slightly blue and was making terrible wheezing sounds. "On second thought, laugh; before you kill yourself."
As soon as Beth released her mouth, she fell over laughing and snorting. Courtney sighed and crossed her arms. "And yet again, I remind you all why you need someone with CIT experience during these challenges."
Ezekiel shrugged, Harold tapped his fingers together, and Bridgette moaned during her recovery.
"The Killer Bass are catching up with six-four on the scoreboard," Chris informed them all after Eva and Beth had taken their seats. "The next challenge comes from the mind of... Duncan!"
Harold and Ezekiel looked round at Courtney, who shrugged. "Well, I'm not doing it," she said. "I know how wicked that ogre's mind is."
Bridgette volunteered for the challenge, despite the protests of most of her team. Heather was selected for the Screaming Gophers, and her cruel grin was focused on the surfer girl.
"So, how's it feel to have your boyfriend stick you in a stink house?" she asked, leaning in close.
"Bite me," Bridgette replied.
"Duncan's challenge is... Wedgies," Chris announced, chuckling. "We have to pick a member of the opposing team to give a wedgie to the contestant. I think I'll pick Cody to do Bridgette, and Ezekiel will do Heather."
Heather looked very worried, furious, and disgusted at the same time; on the other side, Bridgette's sly smile was back as she crossed her arms confidently.
Ezekiel walked behind Heather, trying desperately not to look nervous and failing miserably. Cody rocked on his feet behind Bridgette, also looking nervous.
"Girls, pull out your underwear a tad. Then boys, you must yank like you never yanked before," Chris cheered.
Heather pulled her panties out a tad from behind, and muttered, "Don't you dare try to do anything back ther-aaaaaaaaaaaaah!"
Ezekiel yanked up on her panties, almost lifting the queen bee up. She strained, biting her bottom lip, and clenched her fists. "I... hate... you, Zeke!"
"Think of it as karma for being mean to the others here," the prairie boy replied.
He pulled up higher, making the ravenhaired girl squeak in pain. Heather glared over at Bridgette to see how her opponent was doing, and was startled to see Bridgette was still smiling. The surfer girl was wearing a thong, and Cody had stretched it all the way over his head without any effect.
This went on for a little while, Heather straining and Cody desperately trying to get any effect out of Bridgette. Gwen was grinning gleefully as she watched the queen bee writhe in pain.
"I give, I give," Heather shrieked after a few more seconds. "Just let go!"
Ezekiel did as told, and the Asian-Canadian quickly tried to hide her underwear from the others. Bridgette looked around at Cody and replied, "Good try, Cody. You can let go now."
The tech-geek nodded, and slowly tried to lower his arms; however, his hands trembled after handling a girl's underwear for so long, and he let go. The thong shot from all the way above Cody's head and snapped right back to wear it originated from.
From all over the island, one could cry Bridgette's high-pitched cry of, "YEEEEE-OWWWWWW!"
Bridgette sat down gingerly, hissing in pain. Ezekiel winced, and said, "You need something soft to sit on, eh? I still got my pad from when Izzy shot me in the butt."
"No, no thanks, I'll be fine."
Cody, very red in the face from embarrassment, tried to ignore Gwen's muffled laughter as he sat down. "Cody," she giggled, tears in her eyes, "you're supposed to pinch a girl's toosh, not give her whiplash!"
(Confession Cam - Zing! She zinged him!)
Cody - \stretching his shirt's collar\ "Oh, man... I'm never going to live that down. Never ever ever..."
Ezekiel - \sighs, staring up at the ceiling of the outhouse\ "Man... I really, really shouldn't be saying this... but... WOW! Her panties were so cute!"
Chris Maclean waited for Heather to get comfortable offstage, and began speaking again when she came back out and sat down. "Okay, we have it at six-five Screaming Gophers, so let's see if the Killer Bass can tie it up! Next is an idea from... Lindsay!"
Eva was back on the stage floor, punching her palm. Noah walked onstage, covering his eyes and shaking his head.
"Your challenge may be the most disgusting yet," Chris declared. "It is called... the Better Kiss!"
Eva's confidence vanished as her eyes widened, dropping her fists and jaw. Noah's eyes widened, raising his head and spirits.
"Chef, Owen, and I will judge who is the better kisser," Chris said. "Oh, and Eva, any non-affectionate, physical blows will result in instant disqualification."
Noah strutted over to Eva, who's twitching eye left Chris and focused on him. "Oh no," she started, "don't you dare, don't you-"
The egghead wrapped an arm around Eva's waist, tilted her back a little, and gave her a big smooch. Eva's fingers curled and her hands shook, and angry, garbled words were muffled by Noah's mouth.
"Wow, nice use of body chemistry," Chris said, pointing at Noah.
"Good form with the lips, modest and polite," Chef Hatchet commentated.
"Eva's almost allergic-like reaction is slightly off-putting," Owen said. "I also like Noah's suave moves."
After a couple more seconds, Noah released Eva and backed off. "Well," he said, wiping his mouth on his sleeve, "how about it, judges?"
"I would have been happier if you had used tongue, but you get my vote," Chef said.
"I'm going with Noah too," Owen added, "because Eva looks sick and you look fine."
"My vote goes to you as well, Noah," Chris answered. "And with three votes, you win, Noah!"
(Confession Cam - Noah, you'd better start running.)
Courtney - \her eyes wide\ "Oh my." \She starts giggling, trying desperately to suppress it, but ends up cracking up.\
Noah - \looking ashamed\ "Sorry, Katie. And boy...," \he wipes his mouth again with his sleeve\ "... she sure has hard lips. Rather weird."
Eva - \spitting and using a toothbrush fervently\ "Yuck! Nerd germs, bleah!"
Izzy - \smiling impishly\ "Man, I wish it had been Noah and Cody who were forced to kiss each other!" \She cackles, then stops suddenly.\ "Oh, wait, they're on the same team; darn."
Cody - "Oh man, if it had been Gwen and Bridgette who had to do this instead of that outhouse competition..." \He sighs dreamily, then gets a sudden nosebleed. He plugs his nose and blushes.\
(Playa des Losers, or Plaza de Losers, we forget.)
The ten campers watching the show were laughing hard, clinging to each other or something else to support their off-balancing mirth.
"And... there they go," Trent said as he continued to watch the screen. "Eva's now chasing Noah."
"Running for his life the second time today," DJ remarked. "Poor guy. Good thing he runs fast."
"He runs fast for a nerd," Duncan remarked. Leshawna smacked him on the back of the head. "Ow, what was that for?!"
"You know I don't approve of you using 'nerd' as an insult now, fool," she replied.
"Because of your nerd boyfriend?"
Leshawna growled and chased Duncan around the plaza, an event that was becoming more and more common there.
"Think she'll catch him this time?" Justin asked the 'twins' as he watched.
"Naw, Duncan's too fast for her," Sadie replied, smiling at the male model, "but I'd really love to see what she does if she does catch him. Ooo, that'd be fun to see!"
Lindsay giggled, then looked over at Katie. "Sorry that my challenge idea forced your boyfriend to kiss another girl, Katherine."
"Nah, it was through obligation that he had to do it," the thin BFFF replied. "And I'm sure kissing Eva when she chases him around with the threat of a serious beating isn't that enjoyable.
"And Geoff's a good sport about it, so I'll be too. Right, Geoff?"
She looked over at the party animal. He had been seriously upset ever since his challenge had put Bridgette in the most disgusting place any of them had been. "Geoff?" Katie called to him. "C'mon, hon, Bridgette knows you didn't mean for her to go through that."
"And she looks great now," Tyler pointed out.
Geoff looked over at Tyler, who had Lindsay on his lap. He sighed and fiddled with his cowboy hat. "I just hate how I made her feel so bad. I mean, how could you forgive someone who put you through that?"
"Well, she does accidentally get you hurt a lot, George," Lindsay replied. "Don't let it get you down."
"Yeah, man! Let's just enjoy our friends humiliate themselves more," Tyler said, raising an empty glass up in the air. "Go, Zeke! Go, Killer Bass!"
"Go, Screaming Gophers," Trent exclaimed.
"Naw man, you want the Killer Bass to win," DJ said. "Then the Screaming Gophers can vote off Heather!"
"Except there's that twist Chris mentioned," Justin pointed out, tapping his chin. "Wonder if it's some kind of trap."
"So who is going to win while the score is at seven-five?" asked Sadie. "The Killer Bass or the Screaming Gophers?"
"And what's that twist to whoever gets voted off the losing team?" Geoff wondered aloud.
"And if Leshawna manages to catch Duncan, will there be anything left of him afterwards?" Tyler mused.
The eight campers exchanged glances. "Hey, wait a minute," Katie said, "did we just sum it all up like Chris Maclean does?"
"Guess so. And fittingly timed too," Tyler said, pointing at the TV they were watching. "It just cut to commercial."
Part 2 approaching, drop altitude.
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Yes, this episode is fairly close to Triple Dog Dare. Am I running out of original ideas? Nope (well, maybe)!
Killer Bass - Ezekiel, Eva, Courtney, Harold, Bridgette
Screaming Gophers - Noah, Izzy, Cody, Beth, Heather, Gwen