Total Drama Comeback Chapter 46: Day 17, Part 2: Parodist Bliss, a total drama series fanfic

Disclaimer - The rights of Total Drama Island and its characters belong to Teletoon, Cartoon Network, and all those associated with the show. No profit is being made by this fanfiction. All songs are the property of their respected artists and companies, and no profit is being made in the featuring of their songs; I cannot be held responsible if someone hears you singing them, and you get smacked for it.

Replies to Questions and Comments:

To Everybody - Wow, I got a bunch of suggestions anyway. It's all cool, thank you for showing interest! \glee\

And now, without further stalling, on with the show!!

Chapter 46 (Day 17, Part 2) - Inna Wawa Nakwa, Baby

Chris nodded at the roaring crowd, grinning proudly. "I am glad you all approve of our concert so far!"

"Chris sure is milking the crowd," Beth said to Cody.

"He's gotta, he doesn't get any time in spotlight when we're playing," the tech-geek replied, straightening his headband.

Bridgette and Ezekiel were talking about several songs. "You didn't have to prepare so many, Zeke," she said, "even though it is impressive."

"You never knoo', eh. Comes from doing a lot of work at home school, I end up doing a lot of writing," the prairie boy said. He held up his hands, which were already red from the effort of their first song.

"Oh wow," the blond surfer gasped, looking at them. "They're redder than a baboon's butt!"

Ezekiel blinked, then guffawed. "That's funny."

"Not really."

"Soo'ry," he said, lowering his head. "Dad said to always laugh at a girl's jokes."

"You don't have to laugh if it wasn't that funny."

"I find monkey behinds humorous, eh."

Bridgette couldn't help but smile. " 'Monkey Behinds.' Should have named our band that!"

"Now that's funny, eh!"

He turned and looked at the audience. "I heard that rock stars do a lot of weird stuff. Should I pick my noo's at them, eh?"

"Ewwww, no!"

Izzy and Harold were standing close, whispering strategies. "So," Harold said, "we continue with what we had planned?"

"It's been working for us so far, my mohawked friend," Izzy said, nodding a great many times. "You look a little like Duncan. Maybe you could channel his spirit into your body to get some more rocker vibes."

"But he's not dead."

Izzy blinked, then snapped her fingers. "Shoot. But oh well, he owes me money."

Chris looked between the three bands, then blew an air horn into his megaphone. "Alright, you three roof-burning rock bands," the handsome host continued. "We have hungry fans to satisfy!

"But first... any requests?"

"PLAY THREE BIRDS," Owen bellowed, bouncing up and down. "Three Birds, Three Birds, Three Birds!"

"Owen, stop it before you humiliate yourself," DJ shouted, grabbing his friend's shoulder.

"Him?" Courtney said, raising an eyebrow. "You're talking about the boy who stripped naked on international TV several times; he has no shame."

"Stairway to Heaven," Sadie shouted. She turned and asked Katie, "That's what we're supposed to shout, right?"

"Right!"

The two started chanting, "Stairway to Heaven," and Noah, with encouragement from Geoff ("I will tickle you nonstop on live, national television if you do not start getting into this, dude,"), began to chant with them.

As they were chanting, Bridgette's arms were up over her chest, and she took deep breaths to calm herself. Ezekiel noticed this, but before he could ask what was wrong, Chris shouted at the BFFFs.

"No Stairway to Heaven! Denied," he shouted, receiving "Awww's" and boos from the audience. "But I think Against the Odds, who are next, have something else from that band ready!"

"Yay," the audience and the BFFFs shouted.

"What?!" Bridgette shouted, horrified.

(Confession Cam - Keep on rockin' but you can't come in!)

Bridgette - "I know I shouldn't hold it against them. They didn't know what I experienced from that one Led Zeppelin fanboy who tried to convince everyone about getting to second base! But whenever I hear one of their songs, I remember distinctly the chants of 'Show us your boobs' and 'Let's see second base'!"

Chef Hatchet - "I hate this! I should be out there rocking! It ain't right!" \He kicks down the back wall of the outhouse and leaves, grumbling.\

Cody stood in front of the microphone, holding his guitar up proudly. "What's up, Wawanakwa? Are you ready to rock and roll?"

The audience screamed wildly, affirming that they did indeed want to rock and roll. The tech-geek was so thrilled, he basked in the roar of the crowd for a few seconds.

"Remember," Chris interrupted with his megaphone yelling, "round 2 is about other people in the show! So let's see how much your fellow campers and ex-campers enjoy this!"

"No no no no," Bridgette whimpered. "Don't play-"

"Are you ready for some Led Zeppelin?!" Cody yelled.

The audience bellowed exuberantly, confirming that they did truthfully want Led Zeppelin. Beth giggled at Cody, finding his love for the crowd rather cute.

"Then, here we go," the tech-geek shouted. The screen behind his band lit up, and footage began to play.

"The Enemies of the Screaming Gophers"

Parody of "Rock and Roll" by Led Zeppelin.

(First part played with clips of Chris Maclean.)

It's about due time for an upheaval,

It's been too long that we've suffered evil.

We know Chris Maclean, loves to see us strain,

loves to yank our chain, and we're all under his thumb.

It's about due time, about due time,

To get that grinnin', sinnin', spinnin', thinnin', has-been swine.

("Yeah, and next is Chef!")

(Second part played with clips of Chef Hatchet.)

It's been a long time since I ate real food,

I'm sure Chef's put bugs in what he has stewed.

It makes me hack, take another whack,

Yeah I'll talk smack, wish my taste buds were numb.

It should be a crime, should be a crime,

To eat Chef's yucky, mucky, sucky, gucky, upchucky grime.

("Next is one of our own...")

(After an instrumental break, in which Cody and Beth head-bang, the third part plays with clips of Heather.)

It's about time we're free of that witch,

Heather wails, making our eyes twitch.

Saying we smell, hearing her yell,

Giving us hell, but then the votes all came rushing in.

So it's rather fine, it's rather fine,

Free from that screechin', beechin', leechin', creepin', bleepin' whine.

("Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!")

(Last part played with clips of the Screaming Gophers team.)

And it was real fine, that team of mine

They are the dreamin', beamin', gleamin', schemin', Screamin' Gophers!

The crowd burst into wild, almost-deafening cheering. Beth and Cody whooped and cheered right back, waving to the audience.

Heather in the audience growled and narrowed her eyes. Chef behind the stage cracked his knuckles in fury. Chris on the stage cackled and clapped his hands.

"Most AWESOME use of a Led Zeppelin song," he shouted, after at long last the cheering died. "Shame the stairway was denied, but oh well."

Beth and Cody hugged in celebration. The farm girl saw Justin wink and give two thumbs-up, and she flushed; Cody was too busy appealing to the audience to notice.

"Next up are Nature's Wild Children," Chris announced, walking over to the left side. "Let's see what they've got ready!"

Ezekiel was at the drums, and Bridgette was at the microphone, but the surfer girl looked anything but ready. She had her arms crossed tightly over her breasts, her eyes shut tight, and her breathing was hard and fast.

"Bridgette?" Ezekiel called out to her, when she didn't do anything to start the song.

"Um, Bridgette of the Waves?" Chris said, tapping the surfer girl's shoulder.

The audience was silent, waiting for the next performance. Then someone in the audience shouted, "Show us your boobs!"

Her eyes shot open, her breath caught in her throat, and she only managed to let out a choked sob before turning and running off the stage.

"Bridgette!"

Ezekiel stood up and watched her run behind the curtains at the back of the stage. He tried to follow her, but Chris shouted, "Whoa whoa, Zeke! You leave now, your team is disqualified."

The prairie boy looked back and forth from the stage curtain to the audience. More than anything he wanted to follow Bridgette, but he couldn't let the challenge end there. He picked up one of the guitars and walked to the microphone.

Before starting, he leaned down while looking directly at Tyler. "Hey bud'day," he called out to his jock friend, "go find 'oot who yelled that and KILL him!"

"Will do," Tyler shouted, saluting and wading into the crowd in the audience.

With a heavy sigh, Ezekiel straightened up and looked at the audience. Taking another deep breath and trying to remove the angry scowl from his face, he searched through the iPod-like controller for his music selection.

"What's only good for one person?" he said to himself. "Joel programmed most songs to need a band and guitar, eh..."

He stopped when he came across a certain genre he liked, but he knew he wasn't exactly too fond with others. Ezekiel had made a parody of it with Bridgette, but both agreed it wasn't likely they'd use it...

"Alright then people," he said to the audience. "I've been left little choice here, eh, but that's just too bad.

"I hoo'p you like country, eh."

"My Fellow Campers"

Parody of "Live Like You Were Dying" by Tim McGraw

Never understood how they could do it.

With gusto, they were always for it,

challenges that seemed foolish to say the least.

They never let their team down, efforts that are renown

Taking flak from the man, but they wouldn't be ceased.

Asked them why did it, why didn't they just up and quit?

But they couldn't, for their team they'd always try.

("Man, ya gonna die.")

Watching them...

They went kart driving,

(Tyler races one of Joel's karts.)

They went ninja long blade fightin',

(Harold, with a headband, swinging a katana blade.)

He went zero-point-half nude seconds on a moose with attitude.

(Geoff being bucked off the moose with his pants at his ankles.)

She lost her braces,

(Beth gives a gleaming grin.)

And they crossed bases,

(Duncan and Courtney embrace.)

And they sent their opponents a-flyin'.

(Eva yanks Cody right off his feet in tug-o-war.)

And I love these guys, they're my fellow campers,

I just wish they weren't near dyin'.

The ones that you wouldn't expect to,

would always stick close to you.

The ones that'd catch you over a pool of jellyfish

And now it's time to enjoy this,

Though it's not exactly bliss.

But hey, friends like these are for what I wish.

Though they scared me with a hook,

And one doesn't know to cook, it's what they do

And I wouldn't switch them.

Because...

They went prom dancin',

(Geoff and Gwen seen at the fake prom contest.)

They were cuff linked an' close to fightin'

(Leshawna and Duncan, cuffed, snarling at each other.)

They stuffed their face with food until they were about ready to puke.

(Owen chugs down cockroach shot glasses.)

And they ran faster,

(Bridgette runs across the fire-shooting pathway.)

And they cursed harder,

(Lindsay lets Heather have it with a censored streak.)

'Cuz they gave it all and it's quite trying.

(Gwen, Bridgette, and Beth during the torture challenge.)

And I'm proud to know my fellow campers,

I hope they don't die trying.

I could feel my spirit life and I've gotta now agree

To give it all that I can give it,

because now I must commit,

and this will hurt a bit...

but it's too late to quit!

Dodge brawlin',

(Owen throws a ball at Harold, who dodges.)

And I did some major butt-haulin'

(DJ pushes all the Killer Bass's canoes.)

I had to talk to girls and I finally managed to get a clue!

(Geoff goofs up with Bridgette / Geoff and Bridgette making out.)

Almost met the reaper

(Owen leaps the 1000-foot cliff.)

But what was much sweeter

(Ezekiel gives Heather a kiss.)

Was when I could feel my heart a-flyin'.

(All of the couples embrace.)

So try to be like me and my fellow campers

To try some death defyin'

Will you stop your sighin'

No make-up applyin'

So live like you were dyin'

Just please don't come out cryin'!

To Ezekiel's surprise, the audience was cheering and clapping at the end. He stared a couple seconds, raised his fist in the air and shouted, "Thank you, I'll be right back, eh!"

The prairie boy went back stage. Bridgette was sitting against the wall, looking devastated. Her breath was coming out slow and hard, and she seemed to be in shock.

"Bridgette?" he said, trying to get her attention. He sat down next to her when she didn't reply, and put his hand on her shoulder. She didn't seem to recognize his presence for a few seconds, and that was only to look at him from the corner of her eye.

On the stage, Izzy and Harold were discussing what song to do next as Cody looked deeply ashamed.

"I didn't know it would upset her," he admitted to Beth. The tech-geek was staring at the stage floor, shaking his head and covering his eyes. "I thought she just didn't like Led Zeppelin."

"It wasn't your fault, Cody," Beth said to him.

"I still feel like a complete jerk."

Chris tapped on his megaphone. "Is Pheer Our Leet Skillz ready?"

Harold stood at the microphone with his guitar, slicking his mohawk spikes straight up. Izzy was at the drums, adjusting her bra straps. "We're good, Chris," Harold informed the host.

"Then let's hear it!"

"Island Inmates"

Parody of "All the Small Things" by Blink 182

(Footage of brown bear and raccoon.)

Island inmates

Somewhat ingrates

They steal, last straw

Can't fight, they claw

(Footage of Katie and Sadie.)

Justin, they flip

Joined up at the hip

Giggling, quibble

indivisible.

(Footage of Chris Maclean.)

Wakes us up soon

Still see the moon

Would ignore but

he has air horn.

(Izzy starts blaring the air horn to "na na na...")

(Footage of Owen.)

Good mood

he yells.

Big fart

I smells.

(Footage of Izzy.)

She ran from the helicopter

I wonders what's the deal with her

(Footage of Harold.)

Say I'm ninja

That is nerd law

Weirder the scene

Favors my skills

(Harold shouts ninja yells, "wah cha wha cha cha hi -yah...")

(Footage of Bridgette.)

Shooting the curl

Hope she don't hurl

She pitch a tent

Just like a guy

(Footage of Ezekiel.)

Wants a good thrill

Eva wants to kill

Keep your toque on

Zed-wearing chill

(Footage of Beth.)

Dared to say no

Courage to show

Get braces off

Come sing along

(Footage of Cody.)

Has that sly grin.

He's straw pole thin.

You will get the girl

Just can't say when.

The audience roared in approval, pumping their fists in the air. Harold bowed, his mohawk spikes grazing the floor of the stage. Izzy stood up on her stool, whooping.

"That's it for Round 2," Chris Maclean declared, clapping for Pheer Our Leet Skills. "We've got one more round, three more songs. Right now, the three teams are pretty close, but Nature's Wild Children is behind the most."

Ezekiel and Bridgette had been quiet with each other while sitting in the back. At the mention of their band, the surfer took a deep breath.

"I owe you an explanation," she said quietly.

Ezekiel didn't know how to reply, so he gave her a faintest of nods.

"Honestly, country?" Chris continued, rolling his eyes. "Well, round 3 has now begun! The bands must make a song about Total Drama Comeback! First up will be... Pheer Our Leet Skills! Again! Woohoo!"

Izzy was at the microphone already, bouncin up and down on her feet in excitement. Harold was at the drums with a microphone ready for him too.

"You two have got the fans rocking for you," Chris continued. "And we all know you two would be the biggest rock stars!

"Even Chef agrees!"

The host pointed at the crowd, where Chef was. He stood with the ex-campers, and he had a giant foam finger that said "POLS #1". The cook glared at the host.

"I told you not to single me out here in the crowd!"

"Aw c'mon, Chef! Show the band your full support!"

Chef Hatchet rolled his eyes, then ripped off his shirt: he had "POLS roxors my soxors" on his chest. Geoff and Justin high-fived him, cheering wildly.

Izzy squealed in joy. "Then this one goes out to our biggest fan, Chef Hatchet!"

"Comeback Victory"

Parody of "We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister

We aren't gonna make fuss

No, Chris ain't gonna break us

'Cause we're making our comeback, on this show!

We rocked the strikers game, yes

The guys all wore a dame's dress

We've had our strife, we've come out strong

We bust right out of our jail cell,

We've given each other hell

From Harold's wreck, to Bridgette's thong.

So those these contests make stress

And, a lie is the cake, yes

But this will be our comeback, hear us roar!

Your defeat is impending

You're gonna need some mending

We will kick your shin, we will outlast you

The marshmallows will be ours

We'll win the dares and race karts.

We'll be throwing, snowballs at you!

(Izzy and Harold together.)

Whoa-oh-oh! Whoa-oh-oh!

We're geeks! (yeah!)

Win spree! (yeah!)

We're freaks! (yeah!)

Victory! (yeah!)

Whoa-oh, and we're doing fan service!

And that bear makes us nervous!

But we are the ones who are gonna score!

On Wawanakwa Island!

Woah, we are rocking this band!

Oh, we'll be winning this one, we're hardcore!

(Izzy and Harold together.)

Whoa-oh-oh! Whoa-oh-oh!

Izzy - They're dead! (yeah!)

Harold - No josh! (yeah!)

Izzy - I'm red! (yeah!)

Harold - Oh GOSH! (yeah!)

We're not gonna lose this

Yeah, we might even bruise Chris!

And we could even knock him, to the floor!

We are gonna win this

(Izzy - "YEAH!")

Yes, we're serious business

This just might lead up to some, blood and gore!

(Izzy - "Give it up for E-Scope!")

We're the best in all of Muskoka

(Izzy - "And the ninja!")

Hey, the duck's got a bazooka!

(Izzy - "Hi, mom! Hi hi hi!")

I don't think I can make rhymes, anymore!

The crowd went wild, and Izzy was leaping up and down, cheering and cackling.

"Yeah, that's what E-Scope's talking about," she shouted. "Thank you, thank you, we appreciate you helping us win with your cheers!"

"Next is Against All Odds," Chris said. "Can they get to the top in this final round, being in the middle of two performances?"

Cody and Beth were discussing something. "Are you ready for this, Beth?"

The farm girl nodded a great deal. "Oh yes, oh yes! I'm actually good at this speeding metal!"

"That's speed metal, and I gotta say, I am so impressed!"

"Thanks Cody, you're so sweet!"

As Beth walked to the front of the stage, Cody sat at the drums, plopping down with a love struck sigh.

(Confession Cam - The nonmusical interlude of the show.)

Cody - "How can you not like a girl who's sweet, thinks highly of you, and has a hidden talent for Guitar Savior's most difficult song? She and I could ace that on two-player! Could Justin do that? I don't think so!"

Backstage, Bridgette was done telling Ezekiel about the creep who had humiliated her at high school. The surfer girl sat there, her knees hunched up to her chest.

"Bridge, I'm so soo'ry," he said to her, rubbing her back in comfort.

"You couldn't have known. Neither could have Cody, but...," she let out a heavy sigh. "No, it's no one's fault for mine for not making my intentions clear."

Ezekiel didn't know what else to say. He felt like anything he said might offend her or make her more upset. He wanted to win this contest, but he didn't want Bridgette to suffer any more humiliation.

"Are...," he started, then stopped.

"What?"

"No, I... umm..."

He bit his lip, took a deep breath, and asked, "Do you want to finish this contest, or would you like to call it, eh?"

Bridgette looked around, trying to find an answer. "I should," she said, "it wouldn't be fair to you. But... I..."

On the stage, Beth grinned at the large audience. "Okay people," she shouted. "All you speeding metal fans-"

"Speed metal," Cody hissed from the drums.

"Speed metal, sorry," the farm girl corrected herself, "and all you Guitar Savior fans, Cody tells me that you know, love, and dread this song? Are you ready?"

"YES!"

"Are you su-uuuuuuuuuure?"

"YES!"

"I found him," a voice from the far back shouted, followed by sounds of a struggle and pummeling.

"The Power Ballad of TDC"

Parody of "Through the Fire and Flames" by Dragonforce

(Beth starts up the song, and when it really picks up, she doesn't fail. The audience goes ballistic, and people are jumping up and down; also going up and down is the guy who heckled Bridgette, being thrown around by Tyler.)

(Beth finishes the musical start, and begins to sing while footage of Total Drama Comeback plays on the screen behind her.)

All on the Dock of Losers, where we last said our good-byes,

Chris says it's talent show again, oh did he even try?

It's popular kids verses nerds, in a prom that's gone awry.

Disaster at the dance occurred while dancing with those guys!

Paddling hard, cycling on for the team, reaching Boney Island,

And dressed up as others is the theme, after the race on the sand.

Cuffed up at the wrist and clenching fists, connected at the hand,

Through mental scars, and DDR, we stand...

So we got ninja swords, ninja fighting in the forest

Fighting and running towards, it's our ninja best.

Underneath the snowfall, underneath the snowfest,

Putting our winter skills to the test...

So we dress up, it's time for a dance,

Heading off to a dangerous prom;

We can't complain if we have a crocodile the next day-

With the duck and his grenades, we carry on!

(Beth and Cody really go to town rocking, as more footage of TDC plays during the small interlude.)

So whatever we're eating, from chocolate to dead bugs,

It's either really bad or delicious, just please no gummi slugs!

Driving fast 'round the island's track, there's a burning rubber start;

With side-challenges that make us fear for life, we end up crashing our karts!

And we're rushing fast, concussions pass, in our striker game,

And just maybe, we'll get in Hall of Fame...!

The wrath of our ex-teammates, absolutely no restraint;

It became a combination, of puke, blood, and love.

Mixing yaoi and yuri, unleashing inner fury,

It's Final Ten, so now we must take off the gloves!

So dig away, escape from the jail,

Or we'll be executed at dawn!

Chris yanks our chain as we try to appease him or we'll fail,

We aspire so we stay, we carry on!

(Beth and Cody go on a long interlude, rocking as hard as they can. When the lyrics start again, both of them are sweaty from the effort.)

Then we're tortured, but we really just got bored,

But a real killer would not be ignored.

We play these songs, rocked on as the audience roared!

And maybe we'll make a record!

So now we play, we hope we're okay,

And we hope that we've probably won,

The Dock of Shame awaits us if we win this, probably,

It's the choir where we sing, we carry on!

(Beth rocks the last part as best she can, falling on her knees and leaning back, finishing up with what she thinks is the 'hang loose' sign but she's doing it wrong.)

The crowd cheered and roared for a good deal of time, over exuberant from the rush of the song. Beth pumped her fists in the air as she got back up on her feet and shouted, "Thank you! Thank you, speeding metal fans!"

Cody high-fived her, and the two sat down on the stage, panting and nursing their sore hands.

"Well, I can see why someone would want to be a rock star now," Beth shouted over the roar of the audience; Cody could barely make her out, but he nodded all the same.

As Chris tried to get the audience to calm down, Bridgette and Ezekiel were standing up behind the stage. "Are you ready, Bridgette?" he said to her, looking worried as well; he even looked a little more worried than her.

The surfer girl nodded, then sighed. "I guess I might as well show off my cleavage," she muttered, her fingers coming to the top button of her shirt.

"No," the prairie boy shouted, grabbing her hands. "Bridgette, doo'nt you dare! You're just fine the way you are, eh!"

Bridgette blinked, staring back into Ezekiel's earnest eyes. "Um, Zeke?" she said. "You kind of have your hands on my boobs."

The prairie boy looked down at her chest, and saw that he did indeed have his palms on the top of her breasts. Retracting them as if he had burned them, he started chanting, "I'm soo'ry, I'm soo'ry, I'm soo'ry-"

"Come on then," Bridgette said, grabbing his wrist and pulling him onto the stage. She had a determined smirk on her face, while Ezekiel looked panicked.

When they were back onstage, the audience, who Chris had just managed to calm them down, burst into cheers again. Those that could see them on the close-up were wondering why Bridgette, who had run off the stage in fear, was smiling confidently, while Ezekiel, who had performed alone and went to help her, was blushing and frantic-looking.

The blond surfer stood at the microphone, waving at the crowd. Geoff was whooping like a madman, leaping up and down. As Bridgette blew him a kiss, Tyler suddenly walked next to him, dragging a mean-looking teenager behind him.

"I found the guy yelled that," the jock shouted, proud. "What shall we do with him, Bridge?"

The surfer giggled and shrugged. "Oh, I dunno. Purple nurple?"

Tyler grinned, and faced the jerk to Geoff. "You want to do the honors?"

"Heck yeah, dude!"

An agonized, yet quite humorous, scream lifted over the cheering of the crowd, and the mass of people soon calmed down. Bridgette turned back to Ezekiel, who was adjusting his toque nervously. "Thank you, Zeke. You ready?"

"Ayup yup."

"I Can Has Marshmallows"

Parody of "I Wish I Had an Angel" by Nightwish

(Together.)

I wish I had marshmallows

So I won't walk the Dock

I wish for immunity

tonight!

(Bridgette takes to center stage, trying to look as mysterious as possible.)

Keep tryin' to win this show

But how much humiliation is this worth?

We keep enduring, through pain and snow

Can you tell me why I try anymore?

That cook, his food sucks

That host, he sucks harder

(Ezekiel.)

I wish I had marshmallows

For this second season

I wish I had marshmallows

For immunity reasons!

(Together.)

Now I'm stuck in a rut

Wishing to kick Maclean's butt

I wish I had marshmallows tonight!

(Bridgette takes over, going down to her knees for more dramatic effect.)

Watching me in reruns too.

Not ending up like the interns do.

(She gets back up, flipping her ponytail back.)

Last season was hard...

This season is harder!

(Ezekiel.)

I wish I had marshmallows

A fluffy one in my palm!

I wish I had marshmallows

And I'd eat them, nom nom nom!

(Together.)

I'm becoming a kook

Eating food that makes me puke

I wish I had marshmallows tonight!

(Ezekiel.)

Had my fill, wants to chill

Wants to tell Chris to fly a kite

It the pits, so make amends

Oh I've had my fill, just cut to commercial!

(Bridgette.)

Chef will raise heck

Here to Quebec

If he doesn't get his paycheck.

(Ezekiel.)

I wish I had marshmallows

I got a one-track mind

I wish I had marshmallows

Eating them passes the time.

(Bridgette.)

I'll survive this, no sweat!

(Ezekiel.)

Can I has marshmallow yet?

(Together.)

I wish I had marshmallows tonight!

I wish I had marshmallows

Get off your butt of jello!

Gimme a damn marshmallow!

The audience burst into loud cheering and shouting. Bridgette sighed in relief, and bowed. Ezekiel walked up to her and patted her shoulder.

"You did so well," he said to her.

"Thank you, you did too! And you know what makes it worth it?"

She pointed down into the audience. Geoff was shouting louder and jumping higher than anyone.

Ezekiel chuckled, then noticed Heather. The queen bee was trying to cover her mouth with her hand, a joyous smile on face she didn't want people to see. He waved at her, and she waved back, revealing the smile; she turned away and flushed.

"It sure did make it worth it, eh," Ezekiel added to himself.

"Those were some awesome parodies," Chris declared. "You six are so incredible, your hatred of me is wicked!"

"I'll never understand why he enjoys that," Harold said to Izzy, who nodded.

The handsome host held up a little electronic device. "I have here the results of this wild, rocking, head banging contest! So who do you think all won?

"Nature's Wild Children, Pheer Our Leet Skillz, or Against All Odds?"

The audience started chanting for their favorite bands and campers. Geoff was leaping and shouting so much, he accidentally knocked Tyler over; luckily, he landed on the creep that had beat up, so it was a painless landing (for the jock, that was).

"The winner of the Terrific Wawanakwa Outstanding Battle Of Our Bands Show Based On Invented New Golden Oldies ("That's dirty," shouted some of the campers) is...

...

"AGAINST THE ODDS!"

Beth and Cody leapt in the air, shouting in joy. The tech-geek even picked up the farm girl and spin her around in joy.

"Thank you, Guitar Savior fans," he shouted to the audience, holding up two 'hang loose' signs. "The Wawanakwa audiences are the best audiences in the world! WOOOOO!"

Beth also held up her hands to do two wrong versions of 'hang loose,' but Cody corrected her. She was giggling so much, she grabbed Cody in joy and hugged him tight.

From the corner of her eye, she saw Justin clapping and smiling at her. She waved back, and he winked. At this point, Beth felt she couldn't get any more excited and happy in her life.

Harold slumped on the keyboard and sighed. "We did our best, Izzy," he said to her. The redhead had sat down on the stage floor, hanging her head in shame. "We really did. You were awesome out there."

"Thanks, you were most righteous too," she said, managing a smile for him. "Maybe if my boobs had been bigger for the show... or maybe yours."

"No, I'm quite happy with my bust's size," he said, chuckling halfheartedly.

Bridgette was shaking her head, leaning on her guitar. "This is all my fault," she said to herself. "If only I hadn't overreacted to that creep-"

"You knoo' I'm not gonna blame you, eh," Ezekiel said, patting her shoulder. "You were awesome. Cody and Beth just did exceptionally well, especially with that last song, eh."

Bridgette nodded, then smiled at her friend. "Think they'll finally hook up now?"

"Oh, that's something to write a song oo'ver,"

Chris walked over and stood next to Beth and Cody. "Against the Odds have won, meaning they get immunity tonight! Be sure to tune in to your local station, our website, or any place where it's been illegally uploaded! Thank you, and good night!"

"Wait Chris," Cody said, grabbing the host's wrist. "There's one song I'd like for all the bands to do!"

"Huh?" was Chris's reply. "Whazzat?"

The six campers on the stage were all smiling and exchanging glances. "We agreed to do this no matter who wins," Bridgette said, preparing for one last song.

"You guys ready?" Harold called out.

"As ready as I'll ever be," Beth cheered.

"Then one... two... three... go!"

(Harold)

Dear Mom and Dad, I'm doing fine

(Izzy)

You guys are on my mind

(Bridgette)

You asked me what I wanted to be

(Cody)

And now I think the answer is plain to see

(Everyone)

I wanna be a rock star!

(Beth)

I wanna live close to the sun

(Ezekiel)

So pack your bags 'cuz I've already won

(Harold and Izzy)

Everything to prove, nothing in my way

(Beth and Cody)

I'll get there one day

(Ezekiel and Bridgette)

I wanna be a rock star!

(Everyone)

Nah nah nah-nah-nah nah-nah-nah-nah nah nah nah naaaaah!

I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be a rock star!

(Whistling to the end, and a guitar scratch to finish.)

(Confession Cam - I think they got the lyrics wrong.)

The Code-Miester - "So wild... so amazing... man, I'd hate to vote for anyone. I'm just so full of love and wonder and rocking! Why do rock stars take drugs, this is most charged I've ever been in my life, and I've zapped myself a few times with my robotics!

Bridgette of the Waves - "I knew it would come down to voting for people I like. I really wish it didn't, but I have to make a choice. I don't want to say 'nothing personal' because that's what Heather says... I just feel really guilty."

Kaleidoscope - \She is giggling happily.\ "Well, I know who I'm gonna vote for! Not easy, but hey, better someone else than me, right? Hehe, it's not like I'm gonna vote for myself. I did that once last season by accident, 'cause that animal hunting challenge distracted me."

Led Zeke'lin - \shaking his head and sighing\ "I feel like the biggest ass right now, eh. I groped my friend!" \He smacks his forehead.\

The Awesome Ninja Harold - "Dang. It's like the harshest slap in the face back to reality, that I gotta vote for someone, or I might get voted off. Gosh."

Beth the Braceless - "I really didn't want to vote for someone this time around. But since I had to... well, I have to make a choice between Bridgette and Harold, though they're both so nice." \She gets out a coin and flips it. Looking at the results, she sighs.\

At the marshmallow ceremony, Chris Maclean looked over at the six campers sitting in front of the bonfire.

"You guys didn't have to keep on your rocker outfits for this," the handsome host told them.

"But we wanted to do," Harold said, holding up his guitar.

"Darn right," Izzy cheered, giving her former band mate a hug. "Good luck to you, my fellow rocker!"

"You too! Good luck to all of you guys," Harold declared.

"Right back at ya," Bridgette replied. Ezekiel clicked his tongue and winked at them.

Chris shrugged, smiling. "Well, you rockers know the role. You see, there are five marshmallows, but six campers. The rocker who doesn't get one loses their music career, has to walk the Dock of Shame, board the Boat of Losers, and you can't come back...

"EVER AND EVER, BABY!!"

He snatched two marshmallows and tossed them to Cody and Beth. "You two rocked really hard tonight. Wild, baby. Wild."

The two caught the fluffy treats, 'clinked' them, and then ate up.

Bridgette was nervously combing her ponytail with her hands. Harold began to wiggle the strummer on his guitar, swallowing. Izzy was gnawing on the drumsticks she had brought. Ezekiel hung his head, scratching off one of his fake tattoos.

"The next marshmallow goes to...," Chris paused, looking at the teenagers dressed like rock stars, "... Izzy!"

The redhead spat out the drumsticks, and cheered. She snatched the marshmallow in midair when Chris tossed it to her.

"Next marshmallow, the one you all wish you had... goes to Ezekiel!"

The prairie boy let out a relieved sigh as he caught his, but still looked down. He swallowed as he looked at the last two campers.

"Okay then Bridgette of the Waves and The Awesome Ninja Harold," Chris said, drumming his fingers on the plate, "only one left!"

Bridgette and Harold swallowed, and looked at each other. She mouthed, "Good luck," and he pointed her and mouthed, "You too." Soon, the tension made them both clutch their sides and shake.

"The last rocker," Chris said, narrowing his eyes, "to receive one tonight is...

...

"Bridgette."

The surfer gasped, and caught the marshmallow. After letting out a very relieved sigh, she looked sympathetically at Harold.

At first, the lanky nerd looked distraught, then, to her surprise, he smiled. "Most fun I ever had," he said, beaming. "So freaking awesome!"

The others looked sad, but he was grinning. "This was a wild contest! Booyah!"

He hugged or high-fived everyone before gathering his stuff. As he walked towards the Dock of Shame, the lanky gun turned towards his friends. "Oh, there's something I want to say."

"Harold, don't make this long now," the host requested.

"I won't," he replied. "Guys, don't feel too guilty now. Someone had to go, and I'm anxious to go to Playa des Losers; however, this time, I won't be hunted by an angry CIT!"

He lifted up the guitar, shouted, "Rock on, dudes," and smashed it down on the ground.

To be more accurate, it smashed something on the ground.

Chris Maclean wailed in pain and hobbled away, holding his sore foot. Harold blinked and muttered, "Oops. Sorry, Chris!"

"Just go, ow," the host shouted, whimpering.

At the end of the dock, Bridgette found herself hugging Harold one more time. "You take care of yourself, Harold," she said.

"You were an awesome band mate," Izzy said. She and Harold exchanged a much lighter head butt.

"Farewell, Total Drama Comeback," he said as he boarded the Boat of Losers. "I rocked, I endured, and I broke Chris's foot! That's more than a man could ask for!"

"Do I have to wear plate armor for these ceremonies now?" Chris wailed as Chef Hatchet looked at the host's sore foot.

"Quit whining, maggot."

The Boat of Losers headed off, Harold waving the whole way. When his friends were out of sight, the lanky nerd sat down and sighed. To cheer himself up, he strummed on the guitar and hummed the theme song.

"I wanna be famous... nah nah nah-nah..."

Back at the dock, the five campers started to walk back to the cabins. "Doesn't seem fair," Bridgette said, hanging her head.

"Yeah, I wish I didn't feel so guilty," Cody muttered. He looked over at Bridgette and said, "Oh and Bridge? I'm real sorry about that Led Zeppelin thing. I just thought you didn't like them, is all."

"Not your fault, but thank you."

Beth sighed, looking up at the sky. "Three more of us have to go. How come last season, no one felt guilty?"

"Oh, I know why," Izzy said as she jumped on Ezekiel's back, freeloading a piggyback ride. "Duncan has less conscience, Heather had none, Owen and Leshawna wanted to win, and Gwen only liked Leshawna.

"And she was upset when we all accidentally voted her off."

"Yeah, I still cannot believe we did that," Beth said, smacking her forehead.

"Actually, only Izzy did that of the five of us here, eh," Ezekiel pointed out, jerking his thumb at his passenger. "We can be guilt-free oo'ver that."

"Fink," Izzy replied, tickling at the prairie boy's neck.

"You think he's going to do it again?" Cody mused.

"Who do what?" asked Beth.

"Chris Maclean have all the people voted off pick who gets eliminated next, now that we're down to five people."

The five looked at each other, stopping their walk short when this notion moved in.

"Well then, I'm dead," Izzy said matter-of-factly.

"What are you talking a'boot?" Ezekiel replied. "I'd be the dead one."

"No way, I more dead than you two," Bridgette said.

"I'm dead'er'est," Beth added, giggling.

"You should sympathize for me, because I'm the dead one," Cody said.

The five laughed, and continued on their way to the cabins.

"Wait," Izzy asked a few seconds later, "which one of us is dead? Do I need to get a cross or a wooden stake?"

Ezekiel - Harold.

Bridgette - Izzy.

Beth - Harold.

Izzy - Bridgette.

Cody - Harold.

Harold - Ezekiel.

Harold - 3.

Bridgette - 1.

Izzy - 1.

Ezekiel - 1.

Voted off List - Owen, Sadie, Geoff, Leshawna, Justin, Lindsay, DJ, Trent, Katie, Duncan, Tyler, Courtney, Eva, Noah, Heather, Gwen, Harold.

Remaining Campers - Beth, Cody, Bridgette, Ezekiel, Izzy. (5 left.)

And one of my favorites is gone. \takes off hat\ Good-bye, Harold. Take comfort in the fact that your fans are going to skin me alive.

Whew, I'm not writing any more parodies for some time. That ate up a full day for me, writing these six songs! Just trying to find six songs that would be good enough was a pain! Want to know why I used the songs?

"Rock and Roll" by Led Zeppelin - I knew I had to do a Led Zeppelin song, despite the fact I don't listen to them. Keeping with the spirit, I denied Stairway, and I actually like this song more. \gets ready to be killed several times over\

"Live Like You Were Dying" by Tim McGraw - I know country is not exactly the hottest genre, but I liked this song, it fit TDI and the challenge well. Comes from looking through You Tube for song ideas, and finding songs that have been chipmunk'ed.

"All the Small Things" by Blink 182 - Winter-Rae is a Blink 182 fan, so this one goes out to her. Also, there weren't many lyrics, which made my life so much easier. Phew!

"We're Not Gonna Take It" by Twisted Sister - I love this song so much. It's like the underdog theme song; I had to use it.

"Through the Fire and Flames" by Dragonforce - The most difficult and fastest song in Guitar Savior (well, you know), and it's just awesome overall. Luckily, I don't have to write the musical interlude parts, so this wouldn't be exceptionally long and you just get the goofy lyrics.

"I Wish I Had an Angel" by Nightwish - Awesome song, though I don't really understand the lyrics. Aw well, it's cool on its own. I figured that adding a little LOLcat humor wouldn't harm anyone. Tee hee.

Harold will be removed from my poll when the next chapter goes up. You don't have to vote for him while he's there, but hey, if you want to do it as a protest, that's fine. Again, before anyone comes at me, I want to say I love Harold too; he is quite awesome, and I'm rooting for him in TDA.

Coming up, we'll be visiting all the campers who've been voted off at Playa des Losers, how they feel about being voted off, the remaining five campers, and what dastardly surprise Chris Maclean has in store!