Title: The Forgotten -- Memories and Love

Formerly known as: If

Chapter 7: The Diary

Disclaimer: I do not own Kyou kara Maou

Written by: Lisse08

Beta-reader: Hottee39

Warning: Spoiler from episode 18, 32 (thanks, hottee39. she's the one who helped me finding out the episodes.)

A/N: Finish exam. YES! But sad… just realized that 17 episodes of my KKM… are gone… sob. Anyway, I'll try to explain what's going on after this chapter. Let's continue.

Xx Yuuri xX

Yuuri quickened his pace. He knew, at any moment, the talk would be finish, or worse; Wolfram would no longer be single. NO! He tried hard not to let his mind stray anywhere near those thoughts. His anxieties increased. His eyes flickered back and forth into rooms and corners, looking for a specific blonde-hair boy and hoping that he would not find him anywhere but in dinning chamber. He stopped dead when he saw the boy standing in front of the dining chamber. Wolfram looked up as well when he caught sight of the black-haired teen.

"Heika?" Wolfram asked. Yuuri lost his speech when he looked into his emerald eyes. Another reason why he did not respond to him was because of the unfamiliar calling that Wolfram had used --the word "heika".

"Heika, why are you here?"

"Um… how's it going on with the prince?" Yuuri said after a moment. Wolfram seemed as if he was struck by lightning for awhile, for he opened his mouth and closed it again. Hastily, he looked aside, away from the gaze of Yuuri.

"I had stated it really clearly back then during breakfast, I have accepted him," Wolfram said. Yuuri had failed to comprehend the reason why Wolfram avoided his look, again! Before he could reason out why, all his thoughts vanished at the spot. It was his words that registered in his mind. Yuuri felt as if he had just been stabbed by Wolfram's sword. He was too stunned to move a muscle. He stared at the blonde, feeling his heart bleeding pain and agony.

Wolfram had started walking away from his position towards him. He was about to leave.

"Didn't you remember anything?" Yuuri whispered. Wolfram stopped for a split moment, but that was all he did. Within the next moment, Yuuri sensed that Wolfram had removed himself from the space. And I thought I was the one who's going to ask this question to you…

"I hope you're glad for me, Heika. My presence is needed, I must leave now." Wolfram said and walked off. Yuuri, how could you forget what you have done? Why are you acting like this now?

Yuuri's world stopped revolving at that instant. For a few interminable moments, he could not hear, nor see anything. He felt the darkness that seeped through at the corner of his eyes; his mind was racing and hurting even more.

Yuuri felt his visions blurred and hot tears stung the corner of his eyes. He tried his upmost not to let the tears escaped but it was in vain. His heart just couldn't stop crying.

"Why? Why am I the one crying now?" Yuuri murmured as he tried to wipe off the tears with his hand. He felt his heart break into pieces as more and more tears continued to slid down his cheeks. The scene where Wolfram cried that night, begging for him to return flashed through his mind. He shut his eyes tight and felt a piercing pain shot through his body.

"It hurts… Why does it hurt so much? Wolfram, was this how you feel when I reject you? Does that mean that I'm indeed in love with you? Why am I so late in realizing this?" Yuuri said as he clutched onto the clothes where his heart is. He wished he could cure it with his healing magic, but it seemed like the wound wasn't something that magic could take care of. Not even the Maou's magic could heal this wound…

"Heika, where are you?" It was Gunter's voice. Yuuri, sensing that his advisor was walking towards his direction immediately ran to the nearest hideout where he could find. He intended to close the door since he did not want to be seen in such a miserable state.

"Heika, Ah, Heika, where are you? Heika…" Gunter's wailing could be heard all throughout the corridors. Yuuri did not budge from his spot until he was sure that Gunter was out of his sight.

Yuuri pushed opened the door, ready to get out of the room but stopped abruptly. This room was familiar. The smell, the scene, the oak door, and the location of this room led him to the night when he was searching frantically for Wolfram that night. He turned around to have a better look at the room which he had intruded. The room belonged to Wolfram von Bielefelt. Last time, he did not have a clear look at Wolfram's bedroom since it was pitched dark when he visited the room. Not to mention that he was in a hurry too.

The bed was situated in a corner of the chamber. The sheets were neatly folded and he spotted the frilly pink night dress hanging beside the bed. As he did so, he felt the ache in his chest. He hastily tore his gaze away from the dress.

On the other side was a spindle-legged table. Yuuri approached the table cautiously. He eyes surveyed the items on the table. Books were stacked up by piles on his right; most of them looked like army and strategies in wars related books, so Yuuri did not bother to touch them as he had no slightest interest what so ever.

Other than books, there was a sketch book, which lied opened at his left. Wolfram loved drawings, but his portraits of Yuuri are bizarre. Whatever he drew always seemed more like abstract drawings to Yuuri because the drawings were always distorted from the original picture. He stopped when something caught his eye.

Situated on the left side of the table, there was something which Wolfram had covered up with an old cloth, obviously trying to hide something. Out of curiosity, Yuuri stretched out his hand to uncover the secret underneath. He pulled the cloth down, hard. He was surprised; there was no dust, as if Wolfram had just covered it recently.

Yuuri blinked and stared with dismay at the secret. Underneath the cloth revealed a canvas which was painted by Wolfram himself. The images flashed through Yuuri's mind, which appeared as vivid as if it just happened yesterday.

"It stinks. What kind of paints are you using?" Yuuri covered his nose as he watched Wolfram's holding the brush and painting his arts. He was sitting on the tool for about two hours already to let Wolfram draw a portrait of him.

"I'm using bearbee excretion paint. It's rare but it makes a good art." Wolfram said as he continued to paint, obviously enjoying the art. He had his nose pinched with a clip.

"Excretion? Hahaha. What a thing to use… How long do I have to stay like this?" Restlessly, Yuuri tried to shift his legs into a more comfortable position.

"AH!! I told you not to move! Now I have to start all over again!" Wolfram shouted angrily.

"Exactly what kind of painting are you drawing?" Yuuri got up from his seat and went over to Wolfram. He felt like puking when he drew nearer the drawing, not only because of the scent but also because of how Wolfram had drawn him into a monster.

"Is that ME?" Yuuri had deliberately emphasized on the words 'me' but Wolfram did not seem to pay attention to him. He had closed his eyes and nodded in pride, expecting Yuuri to praise his artwork. Nothing happened, instead, he heard something. He opened one of his eyes only to see Yuuri had vomited.

"Yuuri!!" Panicked, Wolfram rushed over to comfort him, but Yuuri burst out laughing.

"You tricked me! I was seriously worried about you, you wimp!" Wolfram slapped his king's back with a great force that made Yuuri tumble to the ground.

"Sorry, I'm sorry. It's just that drawing. I thought it doesn't look like me at all, but more like an abstract drawing. You could have drawn it without me as the model." Yuuri couldn't control himself and rolled onto the ground. He grabbed onto his stomach and continued to laugh. Wolfram had turned bright red at Yuuri's comment.

"YUURI!!"

'It was the same drawing.' Yuuri thought. 'Why did Wolfram have this drawing? Wolfram would never have painted me if we are not engaged…"

Puzzled, Yuuri swept his gaze around the room when something caught his eyes. Perched on the bookshelves, right beside the table where he was standing, was a brown-coloured winter hat with two bear-like ears sticking out on the top.

"You're forgetting your disguise."

"Oh yeah. Thanks-" He felt something warm and soft being stuffed onto his head by Wolfram. He blinked for a moment, and saw Wolfram tucking a winter hat that looked childish onto his head. He nearly laughed but his eyes narrowed when he noticed he was wearing something similar to him.

"What's this?"

"It's a farewell gift from Brother. He said Big Shimaron would be cold," said Wolfram, his hands still working on the ties of the hat, his face blushed with light tinge of pink. Yuuri felt his heart thumped a little.

"But..."

"We have matching ones. Aren't you happy?" Wolfram exclaimed with his eyes closed and his hands on his hips. Yuuri laughed and tried to disregard the thoughts.

Yuuri approached the shelves, intending to have a better look at the hat. It was unmistakably the same one. His heart beat faster than usual when he noticed a book lying next to the hat.

He opened the first page of the book and saw a few lines of words. He took the book and sat himself in Wolfram's seat. He read the poem which Wolfram wrote.

After finishing the poem, Yuuri stared at the words for a long time, trying to put all the pieces together. Realization seemed to dawn upon him as time ticked by. Written neatly on the page were the following words.

I'm always smiling for you.

I'm smiling for you to be happy.

I'm always waiting for you.

I'm waiting for you to turn back to look at me.

All our memories, I still treasure them like gold.

For it's impossible to erase you from my mind.

Even if it hurts me,

Even if it tears my heart apart,

Even if you are no longer with me,

My heart is still for you.

Forever and Ever.

Only for you.

My wimp…

"Wolfram, you did remember them…"

A/N

I changed the story title, since this whole thing is not an "if" but it's real. Hope you don't mind.

I see that most of you are confused about what happened in the last chapter. Well, don't think too much about it. Explanation will come eventually.

For now, I'll just simplify it for you. The Wolfram's stories are something that happened in the past, meaning, in the past, Wolfram did remember all those things while Yuuri did not. But now, when Yuuri's back, Wolfram no longer remember anything, why? You will know why as the story goes on. But at the same time… Yuuri had not succeeded in retrieving his "new" memories on what he had done to the past 'Wolfram'. Don't get confused. Just follow the story first. I'm sure you'll get some ideas when next three or four chapters come.

For Chapter 8, "My heart is for you", it still contains angst. Sorry, Wolfram is really suffering… after all, it's really hard for you to recover from the wounds, right? But don't worry, the sufferings will be over soon…It will be time for...a bit of romance... XD