A/N: I don't really have anything to say here, except that I love Grey's Anatomy! Many thanks to:
Mystic Dodo: Thanks for reviewing! Yeah, that one was a good story. Thanks!
White-Pink-Fluffy-Strawberriez: Sorry it wasn't longer, but this one is.
angelraine: Glad you liked it! Thanks for reviewing!
HerFathersJoy: OKAY! Happy you love it! That's a whole lot of chapters, I don't know if I can update that much!
LovelyMaidToTheMasterInBlack: Yeah, she did. You're right, it definitely is not good! I'm glad you like the pace. Thanks so much!
allie00: Yes, it is, but I'm glad you still like it! I don't know, you'll have to wait and see. I agree… those damn Malfoys!
Dan-lovr: Hahaha, that was hilarious! I'm glad you think so. See? He can be a sweetie when he wants to be. It's true… lots of obstacles, lack of feelings. All that jazz.
Shirleybobo: Oh my god, as soon as I read the beginning of your review, I rushed off to fix it. What a stupid mistake! Sorry about that and thanks for pointing it out. I'm happy you enjoy it!
Aisling Jace: Thank you! Glad you like it!
CptnJack's BountyHunterGal Lol, I'm so happy you like it so much!
Hermione-Potter-52036: Yes, that is mighty annoying! I hate it too! But I decided it was called for here. Thank goodness you liked it, though, despite that! I like how you said "update as soon as you can" at the end instead of "update now" or something. Obviously I don't think that people who say the latter believe that my life revolves solely around FF, but you actually acknowledged it, so thank you!
stunt101: Hey there! Happy you liked it! The caps lock thing is a tad odd, but whatever you like is fine by me!
Chapter 8: At Last
After the night in the hospital wing, I retreated in to myself. I only spoke when spoken to, I kept my head down, and stayed holed up in my room. No one, not Shawn, nor Harry, or Ron, or Ginny, could convince me to go out with them or confide in them. I was all alone in this world. My only companion was a guy to whom I wasn't speaking.
I hadn't seen Draco in several days, but this time, it was because I didn't want to. I was humiliated and very upset about what had happened in the hospital wing, so I avoided him. I still missed him, though.
One day, I decided to take a walk around the school. It was early still, so I passed a lot of students laughing and talking, running around, playing. I sighed as I passed a large group of them. I wished to be carefree like them.
I wasn't paying attention to where my legs were leading me, and before I knew it, I was in a hallway that seemed familiar but that I didn't recognize right away. Then I stopped dead. I suddenly knew exactly where I was. I was in the corridor that lead down to the dungeons. Why was I here?
My mind was telling me why but I didn't want to accept it. I was not here to see him. I suddenly felt faint and put my hand on a nearby wall of cold stone to support myself. As I leaned against it and closed my eyes, I heard approaching footsteps. I didn't need to open my eyes to know who it was, my gut was telling me.
"What's wrong with you?"
His voice was soft, yet demanding, as always. I shook my head as his voice filled my ears and slithered around my mind. I wished he would just leave. I had no interest in a chat with him.
"Granger?"
There it was again, more insistent this time. I opened my eyes weakly and there he was. Piercing silver eyes, white blond hair falling slightly in to his eyes, spotless robes of the blackest black cloaking his body.
"I… I just felt a little dizzy," I said weakly, straightening myself up. "It's nothing, I'm fine."
"You've been telling people that for too long," he said, observing me. "What are you doing here?"
"Do you want me to leave?" I asked.
"Does it matter?"
"Maybe it does."
There was a silence.
"Are you alright?" He asked eventually.
"I'm never alright," I said slowly.
"Okay," he smirked. "How bad are you today?"
"Not too bad," I said. We both knew it was a lie. Being near him made my heart hurt. I want to be with him, but he doesn't want to be with me. The statement echoed louder and louder in my mind.
I began to feel lightheaded again. He noticed.
"What's the matter with you?" He asked and grasped my arms to keep me on my feet.
"I…I don't know."
"Liar."
I looked up at him and he just stared back.
"So what if I am?" I shrugged. "Lying is essential for survival. Now let go of my arms."
"Essential for survival?" laughed Draco. "Is this really know-it-all Granger speaking?"
I was so angry. He thought that in a few days, I would just forget and we could go back to being friends or whatever the bloody hell we were. Not a chance of that happening. He had hurt me way too much. I began shaking in fury, but turned and began to walk away before I said something I would regret.
"Granger," he called. I didn't listen to him and he jogged up to me before grabbing my arm and pulling me back.
"Let go of me, Malfoy," I said, my voice shaking, not with anger, but with tears.
"Why are you so upset?" He asked, turning me around to face him and looking at me.
"Why?" I repeated incredulously. "Why you ask? Maybe because, I don't know, you broke my heart a few days ago! And then you just try to go back to the teasing and the talking we had before! I don't think so!"
"Granger, lower your voice," he said quietly.
"I won't!" I cried out. Tears were streaming down my face now. "You don't know how much pain you've caused me!"
A trace of sorrow flashed through his eyes before he enveloped me in his arms.
"You'll be fine," he murmured gently. "The pain will go away eventually."
I stepped back from him.
"Don't pretend that this is a one-sided thing," I said to him. "You can deny it all you want, but I know you feel something. So figure yourself out before you try to go back to what we had before."
Turning and walking away from him was one of the hardest things I've done.
Nothing happened over the next few days, except for Draco eluding me. I saw him every once in awhile but he wouldn't even look at me. One of us was always avoiding the other, and it was getting rather tiresome. But I knew that this time, I had brought it on myself.
As weeks passed, I grew sadder and sadder, more and more alone, until one day I couldn't take it anymore. I didn't know what to do, so I did the only thing I could. I went back to Jason.
He was in the Gryffindor common room as far as I knew. He hated hospitals and healers so I knew that he wouldn't be in the hospital wing. I walked to the place I had once resided in and whispered the password to the fat lady. I stepped in and was met with the sight of Harry, Ginny, Ron, and Ron's newest girlfriend. They were laughing and chatting amicably and it pained my heart.
"Oh, hi Hermione," Ginny said once she noticed me. "You can uh, sit down if you like."
She didn't want me to take her up on her offer. I could see it in her face, in all of their faces. I smiled sadly at her.
"It's okay, Ginny," I said softly. "I'm just here for a minute, to see Jason."
They looked like they felt bad but I just walked by before they could say anything. I padded up the stairs to the boys' dormitories and crept in to the room Jason shared with a few of his buddies.
It was dark inside and I saw a lump in Jason's bed. The other beds were vacant. I walked to the side of the bed and saw Jason asleep. I smiled a tiny bit. I had forgotten what a kind face he had while he slept.
All too soon, he stirred. He blinked his eyes sleepily and, upon registering who was standing next to him, he sneered.
"So, come back again, have you, slut?" He asked, peering up at me. I just looked down at the floor and nodded. "I'll tell you something. You're stupid little fuck buddy did quite a number on me. Gave me a broken arm and a serious injury on my head, which is why I've been out of so many classes."
He took a second to observe me. I apologized quickly for Draco's behavior and Jason waved it off.
"It isn't a problem, Hermione," he said. "It only means that now, I'll have to kill him." He watched carefully as I stiffened ever so slightly and he sneered. "But that doesn't mean anything to you, does it?" I shook my head slightly and he laughed. "Good. Now get in here."
I quietly climbed in to his bed when he pointed to it. I positioned myself with my back facing him. He put his good hand on my shoulder.
"Ah, ah," he said mockingly. "You know better than that. Turn it over."
I obediently turned myself over so that I was facing him. I knew what was coming. And did it ever. His hand hit the side of my face with a resounding slap.
"I'm much too tired to deal with you properly tonight," Jason explained. "But be assured, your actions with Malfoy and all the other guys will not go unpunished. Now, go to sleep."
I closed my eyes and tried to sleep but I couldn't. I rubbed my hand gently over my sore cheek as Jason fell asleep next to me. I felt horrible. I was weak and I knew it. He knew it too, which is why he knew he could control me. I wanted to leave, to start over but I couldn't. I was too afraid. At least with Jason, it was a routine.
I was weak. Too weak to fight to save myself and a boy who meant more to me than I could say. Too weak to try to convince the guy I liked that we were meant for each other.
I knew Draco felt it, he was just denying it, but I couldn't figure out why. I supposed it was because he was taught to be emotionless, to never get attached. It was familiar and comfortable to him. I smiled slightly. It seemed we were both stuck in this destructive cycle.
I fell asleep with his face swimming through my dreams. He would be furious tomorrow morning.
The next morning, Jason shoved me roughly to wake me up. I blinked once and slipped out of bed to stand by his side.
"Finally doing things my way," Jason said. He sounded proud. I nodded, filled with hope that today might be a good day. "That's what I like to see. Unfortunately, you have to be punished today for your infidelity. Really is a shame, but it has to be done. You understand, don't you, Hermione?"
I nodded again. I understood just fine. He hated being betrayed in any shape or form.
Jason stroked my cheek gently and I leaned into his touch. He could be the gentlest, most loving person at times, and I loved that side of him. All too soon, he stepped away and retrieved a belt from his drawer. I stared at it in dread. It was thick and a deep brown, with a large gold buckle. He turned towards me, fingering the belt lovingly.
"You know what to do," he said, waiting. I nodded slowly and took off my pajama top. I then got down on my knees, steadied myself with my hands on the bed and my back to Jason, and waited. The first lash came unexpectedly and I yelped. Nine more followed before he stopped, and I crumpled to the floor, trembling. Jason paid me no mind and proceeded to get dressed, running the belt he had just used on me through the hoops of his pants and buckling it up. He then pulled me up and told me to shower.
I was ready quickly to avoid making him angry. Ten blows with a belt weren't the worst he could do by far and I didn't want to experience his wrath when he was even more enraged.
He was pleased with my promptness and kissed me gently, fingering the cheek he had slapped the night before.
"Is it alright now?" He whispered.
"It's fine," I said, closing my eyes. "Perhaps I deserved worse for what I did."
He chuckled. "Perhaps. But you're doing well this morning, so I'll let it go. Don't make me regret my decision."
I nodded and he kissed me again before taking my hand and leading me to the Great Hall. As soon as I stepped in, Draco's eyes were on me, boring in to me like lasers. I shifted uneasily. I didn't need to look at him to see the disbelief and fury in his eyes. I avoided his gaze at all costs and followed Jason to our table.
Draco never let up throughout breakfast, not once. Jason noticed quickly and began stroking and kissing my skin, making the blond boy across the hall extremely jealous. Draco was possessive in general, but after everything Jason had done to me, I knew Draco would hate it.
"Malfoy is staring holes in to you," whispered Jason in my ear, biting the lobe hard enough to make me clench my jaw in pain. "Why?"
"He's probably angry that I ended it," I lied quietly. There had never been anything to end.
"I figured as much," Jason said. He heaved a great sigh. "I suppose I'll have to kill him today then."
"No!" I gasped softly.
"Why?" Jason hissed, his grip tightening.
"Please, don't kill him," I pleaded. I suddenly remembered having this exact conversation with Draco, asking him to spare Jason's life. "It was my mistake, he doesn't deserve to die. Please, for me."
There wasn't a chance in the world that Jason could even come close to killing Draco. Draco would destroy him before Jason did any damage whatsoever.
"Fine," Jason snapped. "I'll leave him alone. But if he even comes near you…"
"I'll tell you," I assured him.
Ha. Unlikely.
I was sitting and reading in the library later that day when it happened. I didn't even see it coming but before I knew it, I was against a bookcase in one of the abandoned corners of the library with a highly pissed off Malfoy an inch before me.
"What the hell was that this morning?" He demanded. I had missed the deep, commanding voice.
"I don't know what you're talking about," I said, meeting his eyes squarely. "Now if you'll excuse me…"
"I'll do no such thing," he said harshly. "You know exactly what I'm talking about, Granger. What were you doing with that poor excuse of a wizard all over you?"
I registered with bitter satisfaction just how envious Draco was.
"Jealous, Malfoy?" I taunted.
"I don't share what is mine," he stated.
"I'm not yours!" I cried. "I could have been, but you were the one that rejected me, remember?"
"Of course," he said coolly.
"Oh, I get it," I snapped. "I'm not good enough for you, but no one else is allowed to come near me, is that it?"
"You're finally getting it."
"And you're wasting my time," I said coldly, trying to push past him. He grabbed my waist and firmly pulled me back.
"Wait, Granger," he said, so gently that I had to look at him. His eyes were worried. "How could you go back to him after everything he's done?"
"I don't know," I said slowly, biting my lip. "You didn't want to be with me and I didn't want to be alone anymore. I figured that if I tried harder this time, I could bring out the good in him again."
"Merlin, Granger!" he cried. "Open your eyes! He beat and insulted you before, he'll do it again! I'll bet he already has."
"That's a lie," I said, shaking my head and taking away from him.
"You know it's not," said Draco, stepping towards me. "It would take me less than five seconds to find the fresh marks."
"No," I said.
"Yes," he said, softly and sadly.
I had backed myself in to another bookcase and Draco was still advancing on me. And then he was kissing me. It was soft and sweet, but so possessive and lustful. My eyes stayed closed when he pulled back slightly.
"You know I'm right," he said.
"Shut it, Malfoy," I said, cracking open one eye.
Draco just grinned and starting kissing me again.
A/N: I hope it wasn't too random, that it actually made sense, and of course, that you guys liked it! So do review! Speaking of which, although I love getting so many reviews, it takes me ages to answer them all at the same time, so instead of posting them all in the next chapter, I'll send replies by e-mail to those who have usernames and who are signed in, and then I'll post replies for the anonymous reviews in the next chapter. Sound good?