I talked to a few people & they thought it would be best if i started with the dinner ;D so i did. You guys are super cool with all the reviews by the way! I LOVEE Them. [;
The doorbell rang throughout the house late Saturday afternoon and Miley sighed as she sat in Caitlin's room playing with her little toy dolls. All kids did it, they went through the pretend stage that got their imaginations working. Let the torture begin, she thought. She heard Noah run down then run straight back up with another pair of feet.
"Who came over?" the small girl asked.
"Some family friends."
"Then why aren't you down there?"
"I got in a small fight with them – verbal of course," she added, applying to her 'violence isn't the answer' speech she preached repeatedly.
There were no more questions as the three year old went back to her coloring and Miley sat, crayon hovering over her paper while she thought about things. Everything from the what ifs to the meal they were going to have for dinner tonight. From the smell of it it was some type of meat.
Slowly Caitlin got bored, most three year olds do after all. She looked up, staring at her Mom who was staring into space. She giggled at her blank expression, catching Miley off guard and bringing her back to the world of reality, her life. She enjoyed those daydreams so much better times like these. But she couldn't stay there; she had responsibilities to attend. She smiled at the girl, not at all happy. The only happy thing in her life, was the sight of the mere child sitting in front of her.
"I'm bored."
"What would you like to do?" Miley asked patiently.
"Can we go play outside?"
"Sure thing," she got herself up, holding Caitlin on her hip. "You're getting big."
"I know!" she giggled.
Miley smiled, bouncing the girl as she walked downstairs.
"Hey, girls," her Mom greeted as they entered the kitchen.
"Hi, Mommy. Hi, Mrs. Jonas," she gave them both a kiss on the cheek. "I'm taking Caitlin out for a bit, is that okay?"
"That's fine, just stay out front. Dinner's gonna be ready soon." Miley nodded, putting on Caitlin's shoes. Looking around she saw the older boys and Brandi talking. She sighed looking down, wishing she could still show her face to them but she knew that she couldn't. They hated her. Or at least Nick did, and truth be told, she didn't want to find out if the others did the hard way. She glanced back at Nick only for him to be looking at her as well. She hated that he hated her. They held the contact for awhile but Miley couldn't take it, facing back to Caitlin laughing at her story.
They both went outside while Caitlin told Miley everything that had been happening, her new friend, even about her week when she was with Brandi. Of course Miley laughed at each comment, playing along in the conversation, and she was listening but not really listening. Her heart was in the conversation, it always was she valued everything the little girl said, but her mind was elsewhere. On a curly haired boy.
You can only put off a moment that you're dreading for so long. For Miley this moment was dinner. She didn't want to come and see that three people hated her, that's not the kind of dinners she liked. She was more for the friendly ones, with conversations and such. She sat down in her spot, placing Caitlin next to her. Immediately she saw Nick look over her daughter, making Miley self conscious as well. She only prayed that this wouldn't be the one day of occasion Caitlin would act up. Miley put a sample of mash potatoes on Caitlin's plate along with a piece of chicken before getting her own meal.
Joe grabbed a piece of his chicken, bringing it up to his mouth.
"NO!" Caitlin shrieked on the top of her lungs. The chicken flew up in the air landing back on his plate.
"Is there a problem with my meat?" Joe asked Miley who chuckled at the whole thing, trying to hide her expression behind her hand.
"You have to pray before you eat dinner," the three year old told them. She looked at Miley for approval who nodded tense. Joe stared at her, Kevin, and his parents joining. This wasn't her scene. She had too much attention placed on her and didn't even know if it was good or bad.
Joe sensed this, and nudged her. She looked up from the plate she was fixed on. "Hey, calm down. It's okay. Enjoy yourself for once." he leaned down to her ear. "By the way, in case your wondering, you're cool with Kev and I."
She gave half a smile, nodding. "Thanks," she whispered.
"Thank you God," Brandi started the prayer. "for this food here today and letting us be with loved ones here today." Miley looked up at Nick who looked up at her, meeting eyes. As it had always been in the last week, Miley backed down first. "Bless all of us in our lives as we branch out to our Destiny, Amen."
"Amen," Miley murmured, starting to take Caitlin's chicken off of the bone so she wouldn't choke. She may be three, but she still wasn't sure what parts of food she could and couldn't put in her mouth yet. To her it was all the same good stuff. Plus, she didn't want her to scratch her Uvula, that hurt rather badly and then you could hardly be understood after. (I couldn't help myself. Had to add that in ;D)
"Thank you," Caitlin smiled up at her mom, adoringly. She was her hero with no doubt.
"You're welcome, Sweetie," she ruffled her hand through Caitlin's hair.
"So, Miley, how have you been?" Joe singsonged.
She forced a giggle, "I've been good, how have you been Joey?"
"I have been great."
"Miley, can you give me the knife?" she obediently gave it to her mother.
"Miley, later can you play a game with me and Frankie?" hesitantly she shrugged.
"I don't know yet, maybe. We'll see what happens, okay?" she kept calm but it was obvious if you were over ten that her tone fake and she really didn't want to play. Somehow she didn't seem to find herself in the playful mood.
"Miley-"
"Okay," she interrupted, not confident at all with Nick sitting there only to judge her. The confidence she had once possessed seemed to have slowly faded away with her relationship. "enough of me, how are all of you guys?"
'Good' was chorused around, a random conversation being started by Joe. Miley laughed in the appropriate places, chatting every now and then but it was all an act that no one was able to see. She had been in this play for so long, that now during the intermission everything had fallen apart, so she did the only thing she knew how to do. She tried to wipe the stray tears as quickly as she realized they had fallen, holding all of her emotions inside again. She had to be strong, the show must go on.
The plates were left to be cleared while everyone but the parents went in the family room to watch TV. Miley however hadn't yet overcame her fear of being in the same house as Nick nevermind the same room so she helped pick up. It gave her the time to think about things, the one thing that she hadn't found any spare time to do recently.
"Miley, phone," her mom gave it to her though she had been so spaced out she hadn't even heard it ring.
"Who is it? I don't give out my home phone," she asked, confused.
"Say hello."
"Hello?" Miley asked, shakily through the speaker, thinking the worst. The laugh automatically comforted her. "Tori!" she squealed. "I missed you."
"I miss you too, Mi. What's wrong?"
"Huh? Nothing – Nothing's wrong," she stuttered, lying through her teeth. "Why?"
"Your cell is off. I've been trying to call you for the last past week with no answer."
"That means nothing. And I can assure you I'm fine," she repeated, holding the phone between her shoulder and her ear while continuing to pick up the plates. She glanced over at the mothers who while they were pretending to be in their own conversations they weren't and it was quite blatant. As for Mr. Jonas and her dad, they didn't even try to make it seem like they weren't listening in on her half, it was obvious. The one thing worse than the parents hearing was the boys hearing how much it was troubling her.
"Miley, you are my absolute best friend and I know that you usually would have either A – picked up your phone by now, or B – have called me."
It was times like these when she wished she had no friends. Tori was her bestfriend, that was a true fact, but Miley always tended to bottle up her feelings even if someone knew something wrong. She wouldn't show it, she would hide it until she was alone. That was the problem with her true friends, it really didn't matter if she was smiling. They were able to see through it and would ask why repeatedly until they found out exactly why she was upset – but right now, she wasn't able to tell Tori. She couldn't talk to her about what happened because Tori was the only one that knew about Caitlin that she still talked to from Tennessee, Tori was the only one who knew exactly how much she loved Nick, and Tori was the only one that would really know how broken she was without him.
"I am fine, Tori," she spoke clearly through gritted teeth. "I have been busy. With school."
Her friend scoffed. "Yeah right, my lil' nerd."
"I am not!"
"It's not a bad thing. I mean, you're still gorgeous and friendly and everything, but girl, you got brains and you know it."
"I have been struggling."
"Aw, has Nicholas been distracting you too much with his kissing skills?" Tori teased to be greeted by silence. Miley put the plate in the sink, going to sit down on the stairs so she could still somewhat tell what was going on with Caitlin in the next room. "What happened?" her voice was worried, sympathetic, hurt. The last three things Miley wanted towards her. She didn't deserve the care everyone provided her with when in reality everything was her own fault.
"Nothing, I really don't want to talk about it."
"You'll -"
"Tor, I gotta go," she sighed. "I have company over, I'll text you, okay?"
"Whoa, you would do that," she dramatically gasped. "I mean, turning on your cell phone and texting your absolute best friend?"
"Bye, Tori," she rolled her eyes.
"Goodbye, Miley."
The teenager ran to her room, turning on the sidekick before running back downstairs, phone in hand. She ran to her dad, plopping down on his lap next to Mr. Jonas and her own Mom. He smiled at her, kissing her cheek.
hey[;
she texted as promised before turning to the television set. Caitlin was coloring in a picture of some circus animals on the coffee table while the TV blared in the background. She smiled, looking at her daughter she knew that she must have made the right choice in leaving Nick, but somehow her eyes still wandered over to him on the other couch.
hey,. WHAT HAPENED?
drama queen, much? nothing. we broke up.
Carefully, she leaned all of her weight against her dad, counting on him to keep her up both figuratively and literal. Maybe this was how it was meant to be, them in the same house, same room, for hours but not being able to even say a simple word to each other.
why?!
i told him.
Still though, Caitlin was not a mistake, even if she was the reason that her and the man – no, boy – she was in love with broke up she was there for a reason. Without her she wouldn't have moved, without moving here she would have never felt so strong of a feeling.
about C?
no, about my dog. what do you think?
and he broke up with you? im gonna kill him. i am going to call him and yell at him, then whnevr i visit – which i WILL i will attack him. i will bite him if i have to.
that is ABNORMAL. are you a human, or a vampire. plus, dont. he doesn't know everything.
what do you meen he dosnt know everything?
Sometimes Miley thought that she did indeed do the right thing, but others she wasn't so sure. Other times she wondered if maybe she should have told Nick and trusted him to tell her his true feelings.
he doesn't know i was... you know.
when are you gonna tellim?
i don't know if i ever will.
Miley let out a huff, leaning into her dad even further. He nudged her signaling for her to get up. She obeyed, standing confused. Nick looked her way as he heard the movement, curious. Billy Ray pushed himself off the couch next taking her hand gently and leading her to another room, sitting on the seat and pulling Miley down with.
"I'm proud of you, ya know that?" he brought her against his chest, stroking her hair. She shook her head, honestly confused at why anyone would be proud of her. She was a horrible girlfriend to Nick, a horrible friend to most others. Lying to them all, then the one that she didn't lie to she blocked out because she actually cared about her.
"Why?"
"Why am I proud?" Miley nodded, she didn't feel like she deserved it. "I'm proud that you love Caitlin so much, I'm proud that you not once thought of abortion. I'm proud that I can always point to you and say that's my daughter whenever you do something amazing. I am proud about tonight, that you were so well behaved even though you felt awkward, afraid. I'm proud that you didn't start anything with Nick, that you tried not to take away his brothers or his friendship with Brandi. That you're always looking for his best interest still now even if it stabs you. I'm proud that you chose Caitlin over him, I'm proud that you made your own choice, that I can trust you enough to make your choice. I'm proud that you don't let anything set you back, and that if any object tries you'll fight past it. I am proud to see how strong you are, and how you protect others, how you care for others. I'm simply proud, Babygirl."
Miley buried her head into her Dad's chest as a single tear rolled slowly and painfully down her cheek. Her voice was hoarse, and she was once again defeated, crying, helpless. "I miss him, Daddy."
"I know you do," he soothed, knowing just how much heartbreak at that age felt like. At the time you think it's the end of world, and he never really had that serious of a relationship so what she must be feeling was endless heartache. "but you did the right thing."
"The right thing sucks," she pouted. "I got to go give Caitlin a bath, then put her to bed."
Her dad stood up. "Do what you gotta do, Mom."
Miley giggled, playfully slapping his chest. "I love you, Daddy." she reached her tiptoes, giving him a long hug before walking away, wiping her eyes, and turning to her duties. The world may not be able to see it but she was worn thin. This was all a lot of pressure. She knelt down to the little girl, whispering in her ear, avoiding eye contact with Brandi or the boys. "C'mon, Babe, you gotta have a bath."
"Do I have to?" she whined.
"You have to."
She nodded, cheerfully getting up, no complaints. Miley grabbed the coloring book and crayons off the table before walking out, putting them in her bedroom. She warmed up the water to the right temperature, placing her head under the water. Caitlin's hair was short to shampoo and was able to get done rather easily. After she changed her into silk kitty cat pajama's, knowing that they were her favorite.
"Ready for bed?"
Caitlin yawned, shaking her head. Her mother poked her stomach, disagreeing. "Well I think you seem pretty tired." She picked her up, placing her on the mattress and tucking her under the many covers before sitting down next to her, cuddling her tightly against her body.
"I want to talk to Frankie and Nick and Joe and Kevin more," she whined.
"They'll be around again," Miley smiled, stroking her hair. "Who was favorite?"
"Nick."
"Yeah?" Miley rose her eyebrows. This was just lovely.
"Yeah. He colored with me. Then, he told me that I was a good colorer!" she exclaimed as if it was the best thing that ever happened.
"That's cool, he seems nice," Miley internally sighed. She could picture him doing such a thing. She always knew that he was caring and had it in him to make a perfect dad... If he wanted to, that is. That was one of the many reasons she fell for him.
"What day is tomorrow?" the little girl asked.
"Sunday."
Her face brightened. "Pancake day!"
"Yup, then church."
"Do we have to?" she squinted. "It's so boring."
"Well, remember what he did for us."
"Okay," she sighed, knowing the conversation was over. Caitlin was smart for a child of her age, able to comprehend a lot.
"Good, now you go to bed my little munchkin," she teased, poking the top of her nose. Giggling Caitlin pleaded for a song, it was her routine, she almost needed one. "Only one, tonight." She nodded, wanting nothing more than her mother to sing her to sleep, each word with passion. It was the song she had been putting on repeat lately to remind her that she had to be strong, if not for herself for Caitlin... In a way, even for Nick.
Take all my vicious words
and turn them into something good
take all my preconceptions
and let the truth be understood.
Take all my prized possessions,
leave only what I needTake all my pieces of doubt,
and let me be what's underneath.
Courage is when you're afraid,
but you keep on movin' anyways.
Courage is when you're pain
but you keep on living, anyways.
It's not how many times you've been outdone,
it's how many times you get back up.
Courage is when you lost your way
but you find your strength anyways.
She sighed, "You keep on loving anyways." Caitlin smiled up at her. "Now, you need to get some sleep."
"Fine," she pouted, letting her Mom remove herself from the bed.
"I love you, Babygirl," she kissed the top of her forehead, walking out.
"Wait!" she ran up as Miley picked her up in her arms. She dug her head into the crook of her Mom's neck. This was the place that she found her comfort, her safety. In her Mother's arms. It didn't matter who else in life she had, she was determined that as long as she had Miley she would be fine. "You're the best Mommy in the world," she mumbled, already drowsing off. "I love you."
"I love you too. I love you more than anything,"Miley whispered into her ear, placing her softly on the bed before walking out of the room, shutting the door softly behind her. She loved her daughter, that was a fact of life and she wished that Nick could see that even though she did love her, she loved him. She wanted him to prove that she was able to explain to him the whole story. As she walked out it was almost like her wishes had been fulfilled in mere seconds as their orbs met, connecting.
She looked at him for a few seconds. It was only the two of them in the hall. In those eyes, she used to see hope, and though she knew it was still there, all she was able to see now was hurt, depression, confusion. It was all her fault, too, everything he was feeling was her fault. She looked away, not bearing to see the pain she had caused, and started to slowly walk away. But he wasn't going to let her go again. They had to at the very least – talk.
"Miley?"
i thought this chapter was okay. what did you think? also, this story is coming to an end.... so, what do you guys think? a sequel, no, maybe? vote. i'd say... five reviews saying i should do it & ill do do it, deal? lol. i usually don't do that but.. you know... i want to see if people will read it first. also, there's only like, a chapter after this im thinking. SO, with that in mind, VOTE. or just review ;D
i love you guys (;