This extra-long chap comes courtesy of both me and Mabelreid--hope you enjoy! Usual disclaimers.

"Okay," Oliver said, making use of the giant lights in Josh's living room. "Everyone got their stuff?"

A gaggle of heads nodded quickly. "That money is ours!" cried JJ, causing Emily to shriek in laughter.

"Fat chance," Morgan said. "Me and my lady friend are going dancing!"

"Okay, okay," Oliver called again, much to his amusement. He too couldn't help but chortle at his friends' self-assurance. "Garcia, how's this work?"

The blond tech pointed at Will and Kevin. "They've got the master list," she said. "One of you call off a 'task' on it and the person who had to do it will tell us how it went. The other can collect the 'proof of completion' for all of us to view."

"Okay, then," Will said, his long Southern drawl becoming even more drawn out and deep. "First item on the list is for someone to get a piece of clothing from the opposite sex."

"That was me," Emily said, handing over a Ziploc bag with a pair of bright blue boxers in them. "His name and number are included in the bag," she added.

Hotch, Morgan, Rossi and Reid goggled at their colleague. "Prentiss, how did you…" Morgan stammered, his vocabulary shrinking by the minute.

"Red wine, and lots of it," Emily said cagily.

"Okay," Will said, chuckling. "Next up is eating a live octopus."

"Eeewww!" JJ squealed. "Live seafood? The dead ones aren't good enough?!"

"That was me," Rossi said. He produced a photograph of both he and Garcia downing the delicacy in the restaurant. "The event was witnessed by the owner of the establishment."

"Both of you ate one?" Kevin said, impressed. "Wow."

"Giving a speech in public," Will listed.

--That was me,-- Kyle said. –My girlfriend is now my fiancée because I did it.—

--"How on earth did you manage that?!"— Chase cried after everyone gave Kyle congratulations. –"Didn't she go to Denver for the holidays?"—

--Morgan has some far-reaching friends. I got it on national news.—

Oliver stuck out his tongue. --"He's got more witnesses than God,"— he said, shaking his head.

Kyle produced a tape. –My proof,-- he said proudly.

"It's good," Kevin said. "I'll make some copies for you and the lucky lady."

The investigative tech beamed. "Thanks," he said, using his voice.

"Go out in public dressed as a geisha," Will said, continuing with his duty. "That had to be interesting…"

"It was," Garcia said. "My proof is already up there—I'm the one eating the octopus in white face paint."

"That was you?" Morgan said, whistling. "Baby girl, I'm stunned."

"I'm gorgeous, no matter what my face looks like," Garcia said simply. "I kept the kimono, too. My new work outfit."

"I have got to see that," Emily said.

"Me too," Chase said. "Only dress style I like."

Oliver was taken aback. "You wear dresses, Chase? I'd have never guessed…"

"Keep dreaming, Ollie. Not unless we've got a case that requires it."

"Not even if I give up a month's salary?"

"Okay, okay," Will said, laughing as Chase tossed a rubber ball at her friend. "Finding a way out of an unfamiliar neighborhood…"

"That was me," Morgan said. "I didn't make it."

"Now, there's an understatement," Chase mumbled under hear breath, loud enough for Reid to hear her. The younger agent started laughing so hard he began to choke on his own spit.

"What's so funny, kid?" Morgan demanded.

"Nothing…it's just…" Reid gasped, his sides aching.

"You, ah, always pride yourself on 'finding your way out' of anywhere," Emily supplied. "What happened?"

"Chase and Kyle dropped me in the middle of suburban hell!" Morgan said, trying to defend himself. "The damn subdivision was like a giant maze!"

"Oh, man," Oliver said. "You didn't…"

"Took him three hours, five people, and a lot of wrong turns, and then I still had to tell him that I-95 was just three turns from the street that house was on," Chase said simply.

"And those five people didn't speak English!" Morgan cried.

The room exploded in gales of laughter.

"Dressing as a clown," Will read off, his smile widening.

"Me," Hotch said, handing over a photograph. "And my son was there, too."

"Aw, that's sweet!" Emily said. "I thought he was leaving town this week?"

"Haley's new husband had to work," Hotch explained. "It was kind of an accident."

"Still…"

"Yeah, it was pretty fun. Not something I'd do again, though."

"I bet," Rossi sided.

"Eating junk food for a day," Will called out.

"That wass me," Josh said, a grimace on his face. "Eef I evair see another 'amburgair again…"

"I take it that didn't go well?" Oliver asked, a hint of laughter in his eye.

"Ol-lee-vair, 'ow you Americains can eat zat garbaige ees beyond me," the Frenchman said quickly. "Eet ees disgusting!"

"And he took it like a champ," JJ said. "At least now you know."

"Yes, Mlle. JJ, I do," Josh admitted. "And you may keep eet."

"Receive a free dinner," Will called out.

Reid turned red. "I was supposed to, but…"

"He fumbled at the pass," Oliver finished. "And he had the perfect excuse, too…"

"Oliver, for the last time, I wasn't going to make that poor girl feel worse!"

"Would've won it for you…"

"Oh, shut up." Reid said quickly.

"I'm guessing it didn't go well," Rossi said dryly.

"The waitress spilled soup in Reid's lap," Hotch explained.

"Ruined my pants," the young profiler complained. "And it was hot!"

"And he lets her off," Oliver said, shaking his head. "What a guy."

"Not like you were any better, Oliver," Reid retorted. "I mean, he dragged us all the way to Michigan to get a carton of ice cream!"

"No way," Emily said, her face red. "You mean it actually exists?"

"So you're the one who put that in!" Oliver chortled. "Yeah, it does. Only made in Michigan, it seems like, so we went. Took Jack to the Christmas store and everything."

"Really?" JJ asked.

"Yep. He got to see Santa and brought home a fish," Oliver said proudly. "And we ate German food."

"It was pretty good," Hotch admitted. "Jack had a ball."

"Well, that solves that," Will said, crossing Oliver's task off the list. "And your proof?"

"Other than a happy three-year old? The ice cream should be here on Tuesday," Oliver said. "We can eat it then. I got a gallon."

"Ooh, ice cream," Chase said. "My favorite."

"You'll like this, Chasie. Chocolate and fudge inside."

"Be still my heart!"

The room erupted into laughter.

"Dressing as a garden gnome," Will said between chuckles.

"Me again," Morgan said.

"And what a cute gnome he was," Chase said, patting Morgan on the head playfully. "Got himself a date and everything."

--And we got some new clients,-- Kyle added.

"I'd say that went well," Emily said, shaking her head. "Still, how…"

"He made the papers, Emily. And the local news. I can get tapes." Chase smirked as Morgan glared at her. "Maybe a commemorative keepsake for the lucky lady?"

"Shut up, right now, woman," Morgan warned. "Or else."

"Or else what?" Chase smiled.

Morgan turned his head. "Kyle, get it," he said, making sure the deaf man could understand him.

"Get what?"

Kyle pulled out a small digital camera and handed it to Reid, who looked at the picture in the viewscreen. "No way," the young profiler said, his eyes bulging.

"What's that?" Emily asked, curious.

"A photo of Princess Leia, in the little gold outfit…guys, how did you get this?" he asked.

"Chase here is a dead ringer for Carrie Fisher at twenty-five," Morgan said proudly. "Won a ten-thousand dollar prize, too."

"Ten thousand dollars?!" Oliver said, whistling. "Wow!"

"It's going to charity, Ollie," Chase insisted. "The school needs some new renovations, there's Landon's trip to Scotland for competition, and then there's the…"

"Man, there goes the Christmas bonus," Oliver joked.

"You got dinner and a thousand bucks. What more do you want?"

Oliver merely shook his head. "So you went to the convention."

"Yeah."

--I won the trivia contest,-- Kyle said, handing over a shot of him in action.

"Wasn't there one about a Star Trek contest in the pile?" Reid inquired.

--Garcia said I could switch it. She said they were close enough, and the event was her idea.—

Reid turned and stared at the technician. "You cheated."

"Reid, sweetie, the only one who ever watches Star Trek is you," Garcia said patiently. "At least Morgan and I've seen Star Wars."

"And me," Emily chimed.

"And me," JJ and Will added.

"And me," Hotch, Rossi, Oliver and Chase sang out in unison.

"See there? Plus, it is kinda the same…"

"All right. At least you won," Reid said, looking at Kyle.

--The collector's editions come in handy. You should see my Lord of the Rings extended sets sometime.—

"You're on," Reid said. "First weekend I'm off."

The rest of the list was discussed, with each admitting their mistakes (JJ not eating her habanero) and the pluses (Garcia chortling about 'finding' the elusive Michael Westen without electronic assistance). It wasn't until an hour later, when Josh got up to answer the phone, that anyone really started to laugh.

"Mlle. Emily, the phone, eet ees for you," Josh said, quickly handing the device to the brunette.

"Who'd call me here?" she wondered. "Hello? Oh, Mother, I…no, Mother, I did not lose my mind, or my job…no, I have not become a stripper!"

Several of the men's eyes were raised slightly. "Stripper?" Morgan mouthed, and JJ and Josh merely smiled and rolled their eyes.

"Mother, it was a bet, and…yes, I did very well, I must say. He did? Oh…I'll have to have a talk with him later, Mother. Yes, it's safe to say I'll be working that weekend…in Anchorage. Yes, Mother, I will. Good-bye."

"So," Morgan said as Emily hung up the phone. "Starting a new career?"

"Oh, shut up," Emily said, and the room burst into laughter. "It was a one-time deal."

"Too bad," Oliver said. "That mean next time we need an inside woman on a mob bust you're not available?"

"Only if it doesn't involve me hopping out of a cake."

The room burst into laughter again. Kyle slipped Reid something in his hand, and the agent clutched it tightly, smiling to himself.

"Okay, y'all," Will said, raising his hands to get everyone's attention. "The winner of this contest is…Rossi and Garcia!"

"All right!" Garcia said. "The tattoo was so worth it!"

Several pairs of eyes stared. "You got one too, Garcia?" Hotch asked.

"It was a discount thing," Rossi explained as Garcia showed off her ankle. "The artist offered 'my girlfriend' one on the house, to 'really win the bet.'

"I'd take offense, but…it is really cool, Penelope," Kevin said. "The tattoo, I mean, not the part about being his girlfriend…"

Garcia shut the mumbling computer wizard up with a long kiss. "Dinner's on me, stud," she said, firmly grasping the six hundred dollar bills she'd been given.

"And dinner's on me," Rossi said, collecting his winnings. "How does everyone like Japanese?"

"Terrific!" Josh said. "Come, on y va!"

-----

"Come on Willy, this buffet is superior." Peter piled loaded pizza on his plate next to seven layer dip and corn chips. He held a perfectly chilled bottle of Corona in his other hand, a wedge of lime floating in the long neck.

"Vell of course it is! Who do you theenk provided it?"

"You've got a point."

"Hurry up, Wilhelm! It's time to compare notes."

"I am coming."

"So, how did it go?" Stephen was sitting on a large fluffy white easy chair. His plate of food was untouched on the table next to him. He held a sheaf of parchment in his hand and his favorite eagle feather quill.

"Let's hear from Willy first," Peter piped up and the rest of the lounging angels cheered him.

"It vas a very dangerous three days. Mees Garcia got a tattoo on her ankle. I did not like the look of the needle, but there vas no infection. She dressed up as something called a "Gay-shi-a." She almost fell off those high heeled shoes and she found some man called Michael. I vas not pleased that he vas on something called a 'burn notice,' it could have been got her in much trouble."

"Atta-girl Penny." Peter cried out enthusiastically. "I knew she could do it. She and that Rossi won the challenge" He did a happy dance that included complicated gymnastics though the clouds.

Wilhelm sniffed and sat down ramrod straight on the couch next to Terrence. "I do not theenk it is funny."

"I think you developed a real liking for my girl."

"I did not!"

"Who's next?" Stephen interrupted their laughter.

"Since Rossi was one half of the winning team, I'll go next." Jorge said. "Rossi also got a tattoo and contrary to fussy britches over there, it was a clean shop and a clean needle. No harm done."

"I'm very glad to hear that."

"Charlene, did you think I'd let anything happen to your charge?"

"Of course not, I had total faith in you honey."

"Also, he got them into the Honeymoon Suite at the Plaza and the both swallowed live octopi."

"I'd say that deserves a win."

"Your charge didn't have to get a free meal by flirting with a waitress." Stanley interrupted, looking much put out.

"I did the best I could to get him to flirt with her," Reginald argued. "It's not my fault he's completely hung up on Austin."

"He's not a ladies man like you."

"No, he's not," Reginald agreed and he looked proud of that fact. "At least I was able to keep him from spouting off statistics for twenty-four hours and believe me, that was no easy task. I'm exhausted." He put a hand to his forehead and pretended to faint like a Hollywood Diva.

"Oh give me a break!" Connie snapped. "I had to stop Chase from burning down a kitchen. And I had to keep a bunch of young men with bad hair and pocket protectors from mobbing her when she put on that gold bikini."

"Chase put on the Princess Leia bikini?!" Terrence nearly dropped his plate. "I wish I could've seen that."

"You can, I have a recording." Connie tossed the disc to him. "Enjoy!"

"Wow, this is much better then trying to help JJ eat a habanera pepper. I felt bad for her; those things will singe the feathers off your wings. At least she got some poor little store clerk to buy a month's salary worth of Redskins memorabilia."

"That's not as dangerous as dressing as a clown and a reject from the disco era. Between all the kids and all those women hitting on him…"

"Vhat happened to my charge?" Wilhelm was staring down at Charlene.

"He dressed as a clown and as a reject from the disco era. Didn't I just say that?"

"Vhy is eet so dangerous?"

"Because he had to entertain a troupe of kids between the ages of three and eleven. And he had to go to a New Year's Eve party with a disco ball and fight off several women that wanted his virtue."

"I assume he ees okay!"

"Of course, and I got him to loosen up a bit. He even got to go to the land of rare and delicious ice cream and see a shop dedicated to Santa Claus with Reid and Oliver. His son was with him, so right now he's very happy."

"Gutt!"

"Glad I met your expectations!"

"Alright, who's next?" Stephen stepped between Wilhelm and Charlene.

"Well, it was interesting learning American Sign Language. Kyle is something else, he proposed on National television and he won a trivia contest at a Star Wars convention, and he dressed up as Han Solo. It was a nice change but I'll be glad to get back to watching Oliver. I like the spoken word. No offence, Jorge."

"None taken," He smiled at Anya.

"I still say that my charge was the most difficult," Stanley piped up around another plateful of nachos with all the toppings. "He had to try and figure out his way from a maze of a neighborhood. He wouldn't listen to my directions and I know if he could, he would've punched out the SUV.

"Oh no…"

"Don't start, Constance!"

"Anyway, he had to dress up as a garden gnome…"

"I would've paid good money to see that." Peter said as he headed back to the buffet table.

"It was funny! I have pictures if you want them."

"Stan!"

"Constance."

"I'm sorry Stephen!"

"He also dressed up as Mace Windu. The man is a good sport."

"It sounds like your thawing out towards him." Stephen put a fatherly arm around Stanley.

"Yeah, just as long as he doesn't involve Dr. Reid in another high speed chase."

"And, he stood in line to get a light saber for Dr. Reid. It has a neat red light that comes on when you switch in on" Connie reminded him.

"Alright you guys, it's time to move on." Gina said, elbowing her way to the buffet table. "Oliver is an interesting charge. I've never been to Michigan and now I know why. It's way too cold there. And there he was, walking around without a coat like it was summer."

"He's done that since he was a kid." Anya said over her strawberry shortcake.

"Anyway, the group challenge with Hotch and Dr. Reid was hilarious. They formed the Hotchner trio and performed in one of those performance art bars. I think he got three marriage proposals out of that."

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that!" Connie exclaimed.

"Josh was a good sport," Peter put in, sitting down with more pasta salad. "He had to eat junk food for a whole day."

"Ouch…" Terrance grimaced."

"Yeah, and he had to speak only in sign language. The group challenge was a walk into the woods and back again. JJ wasn't happy with that."

"Whose idea was that…?" Gina bristled. "She's afraid of the woods."

"I have no idea."

"How did it go with Emily?" Reginald asked Malcolm.

"I don't think you're going to like it." Malcolm said in a very somber tone. "That's why I have it on tape."

"What happened?"

"You look like you're going to faint."

"Are you kidding, after all the other challenges?"

"You picked up that squeaking thing Dr. Reid does." Charlene pointed out and the others laughed.

"Just give it to me straight!"

"She had to get a piece of clothing from a strange man and she had to do a strip tease after jumping out of a cake. She got a hundred dollars from some dirty old man in the audience when she fell in his lap."

"Bloody hell!"

"Language!"

"Sorry Stephen."

"Let's all watch it." Peter and Terrance held Reginald back from stopping Malcolm putting them disc in the player."

"Oh my God… This is so undignified."

"This from a man that went to more then one strip joint in his human days."

"Shut up Peter."

"Alright, that's enough from all of you." The angels gave Stephen their full attention. "What did you all learn from this?"

"Better the devil you know." Peter piped up and dodged the half-eaten sandwich Malcolm threw at him.

"What Peter is trying to say in his barbaric way is that we appreciate our charges more." Reginald said, pocketing the disc of his Emily.

"And that someone always has more problems then you do." Charlene added.

"Good… Now, I want all of you back to work with your permanent charges. God bless!"

"Same to you sir." Peter shouted back, saluting Stephen.

"Come on Peter; let's go see if Mary and Shelia are around…" Reginald said.

"Can't you two keep your hormones under wraps for two minutes?"

"No Charlene, we can't."

Anya took Charlene's arm. "Ignore them! Let's go get a banana split."