A/N: Hey everyone. Here's the second chapter, and your introduction to Ashley. Her Screenname is [obviously adhasnovds. I/We hope you like it!

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Chapter 2: Welcome To My Life

Getting to Know Me...

Name: adhasnovds … it's an inside joke. But it's also the truth. So.
Nickname: you'll just have to wait and find out
Birthdate: 1990
Birthplace: City of Angels
Hometown: See above
Eye Color & Hair Color: Hot Chocolate and Hershey's Kisses
Height & Weight: Average and A little more to love lolz
Occupation / School: USC here I [hopefully come!
Righty or Lefty: I'm a switch hitter ;-)
Heritage: Get to know me first...then I'll let you in on my family secrets

Favorite Color: Ocean Blue...you know, like the ocean
Favorite Animal: Dolphins
Favorite TV Show / Movie: Buffy/Imagine Me and You. Piper is smokin' hot
Favorite Cartoon: Old School Doug
Favorite Song: Bet on It - Zac Efron ... what? It's totally the gay anthem of 2007!
Favorite Sport: Foxy Boxing?
Favorite Actor / Actress: Jill Bennett, Leisha Hailey, Ellen Page
Favorite Musician: Justin Timberlake omgz hez so cuuute...gags please... secretly plays rock your body
Favorite Athlete: Sports and I don't really get along...but Amanda Bynes makes a hawt soccer player
Favorite Comedian: My best friend when she's drunk
Favorite Food: Cheese. Look at me weird all you want, but I love gouda. Step off. :-)
Favorite Drink: Water. It's so refreshing after partaking in...activities ;-p
Favorite Number: 69 hahaha...no but really. 69
Favorite School Subject: Sex Ed
Favorite Clothing: My sexy little red thong...see through dontcha know
Favorite Book: Madonna's Sex Book
Favorite Snack Food: French Fries and Ranch Dressing
Favorite Season: Spummer. Yes, I made up my own season. The in between of Spring and Summer

Hobby: Your mom...oh wait, that's not a hobby, that's a full time job.
Talent: I can remain completely unnoticed at any given time

Age of first kiss: Well...ya know. 12.
Age you lost your virginity: Ohh, a lady never tells!
Age you got married: Is this Canada? This isn't Canada...
Age you had your first kid: Yeahhh...bout that.

Have you ever been drunk: I don't see the point in drinking
Have you ever gotten high: Hugs not drugs damn it!
Have you ever been arrested: I have not...that anyone is aware of that is
Have you ever been in a fight: Everyday, I'm pretty badass.
Have you ever been in an accident: We don't talk about that...

Fears: The male anatomy
Most important possession(s): My Katie Hightower: Out To Pasture CD. Autographed bitches
Pet Peeve: Slow Drivers and People that stand in the middle of the hallway

Number of Tattoos: One
Number of Piercings: Hmm...you'll just have to come over and find out

Best quality: My quick wit
Best physical trait: Buns of Steel

In the opposite sex...

Cute or Sexy: Let's make it the same sex shall we? And both. It's possible. Rare, but possible
Taller or Shorter: Either or, but if they're taller I have more...uh...yeahhh
Lips or Eyes: Both again
Petite or Big: Hey, I don't discriminate
Sweet or Caring: Come on,, both!
Easygoing or Serious: Seriously easy going.
Sensitive or Loud: There should be a nice ballance

Thoughts on...

Abortion: I suppose it's the person's choice...
Gay Marriage: Hey, let's go man. Who wants to get hitched?
Gun Control: Who cares man...no one follows those rules
God: hates me because I'm gaaaaaaaay! emo emo emo
Aliens: E.T. called, he said he wants his anal probe back.

January 23, 2008
Time: 8:10 PM
Mood: Quixotic
User: adhasnovds

Well, I've been on here many times before watching the GirlTrash! episodes over and over, wishing they'd bring it back so I could finally see those two hotties Misty and Colby get. It. On. But alas, I've been stiffed yet another week. Le sigh.

I figured it was time to get a profile on here though. I mean, what lesbian doesn't have an ourchart profile? Probably a lot I'm sure, but hey, I'm here to support Alice's endeavor. What can I say; I love my L Word ladies. Oh, by the way, BRING BACK DANA!

A lot has happened in my life, some things worse than others of course. My mother died when I was little. So young I don't even have any memories with her. I wouldn't even know what she looked like if it weren't for the picture my dad gave me. She was beautiful; long silky black hair, gorgeous brown eyes, and a very nice figure. If she weren't my mom I'd definitely consider her hot. But like I said, she's my mom.

My dad remarried two years after mom's death and I got stuck with an evil stepmother and two god awful stepsisters. I know, I know I'm making it sound like I'm Cinderella or something, but it's not that bad yet. I actually never intend on it getting that bad either. Once I get my letter from USC I'm out of this house for good.

That campus is like my heaven on earth. I feel more at home there than I do my own house. The fact that my stepmother and her spawns of Satan only exist to make my life hell are the main reason for that.

I guess it also has to do with the fact that my dad is no longer there; he died a few years after he married the bitch. I don't talk about that much. It's too painful to think about. I don't even talk about it with my best friend. It's not that I don't trust her, I do, I just…there are just some things a girl needs to keep private, and she understands completely.

I love that girl more than she realizes, and it's safe to say that yes, I've had a thing for her before. It never developed into anything more, she's as straight as they come and the more we hung out, the more I realized how weird it would be if we did get together. K and I, that's what I'll be calling her by the way, are too similar. Granted we're different in major ways too, but there's no way in hell I'd want to get involved with that family. Her sister is the biggest pain in the ass and doesn't realize what she has in K. It's so sad she takes her for granted like that.

Honestly, this girl is so unbelievably full of herself it's amazing they haven't had to widen the doorways in their house so she can fit her over inflated ego through them. She's basically the Regina George of our school and her friends do nothing but exacerbate the problem; always complimenting her for every little thing while K goes unnoticed for her accomplishments. She's got her Aaron Samuels and of course her Gretchen and Karen. Her Aaron and her Karen have been hooking up for a while. Did I mention that Karen is of the male persuasion? ALLEGEDLY! Sorry, had a Kathy Griffin moment.

But seriously, I've seen the way those two look at each other. There's something going on there, I don't need a gaydar gun to tell me that. Karen has always been a little…fruity.

Her Gretchen though, total bitch. Obviously not as big of one as Regina, but for someone that looks like her…and I know that sounds terrible but God definitely broke the mold with that one. No, like, he made her and was like DAMN and broke that thing into a million pieces and incinerated it. Anyway, the girl is insanely bitchy and extremely fake. Rumor has it she's a pretty good lay, but rumor also has it that she started that one herself. Wouldn't doubt it either.

She's gay too. Gretchen, not Regina. Dear god, if Regina was gay I would die. Hilarity would ensue ten fold that of when she tripped up the stairs…while she was carrying paint. Classic. Anyway, yeah, so Gretchen is gay. I don't know from personal experience, but I wouldn't touch that girl with a 39 and a half foot pole. (I apologize for all the movie references by the way, film is my life). She's experienced to say the least. She's the Pillsbury Dough Boy of our school. Just about everyone, guys included, has had a poke. That thought alone makes me shiver.

You're probably confused right? I say she's gay and then I say she's been with guys? Yeah well, this girl likes to claim she's bi, but we all know that the times she's been with boys is when the alcohol was flowing. I guess her mom is uber religious freak so that's why she brings the boys around. From what I hear though, people only stay for one night. Guess she's not that great.

Back to that neurotic head case Regina though. I guess you could consider her a, continuing with the Mean Girls theme I've set up, "regulation hottie." All the boys want her; all the girls want to be her. Well, ok not all the girls, but you know what I'm saying. She thinks her shit doesn't stink. She walks around like she owns the school, which in a sense she sort of does. You'd think she'd use her influence to help out her sister once in a while. I'm not saying that K needs help with anything, because she so doesn't. I'm saying she could at least acknowledge her presence when they're around each other, which, thanks to Regina, doesn't happen quite often.

Like I said, she takes K for granted in a major way. Like, we're talking avoidance of the plague; those are the lengths she goes to avoid her. I wish K would just let me beat her up and teach her some respect, but damn her she won't let me. Claims she "loves" her, and she probably does. K has a big heart. If only the same could be said for Regina.

There's really nothing wrong with my girl. So she has a thing for Agent Mulder, tries to be a Hogwarts student every now and then, has seen every LOTR movie at least 50 times and fantasizes about Sam Gamgee, and can probably hack into the CIA mainframe in less time than it takes to make a PBJ. She's unique and I love that about her.

I could go on and on for pages, but I won't bore you any longer. I guess the whole reason I started posting here was cause I was looking for a place to get my thoughts out that was more private and more anonymous than a journal hidden in my room. I also wouldn't mind talking to new people. My school is an obnoxious little bubble and this seems like a good place for escape. It may not seem like it, but I really am a good listener. So, ya know, if you wanna talk…I'm here.

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I clicked submit and closed the browser. If people read that rant and I just so happened to get a few phone numbers…well I wouldn't complain. I wasn't lying when I said I needed a place to get my thoughts out, but I wouldn't mind reaping the benefits of some girls that decided to message me afterwards.

Don't get me wrong, I'm no slut. I go on dates, have fun, and sometimes I'll call the girl again. If I get lucky, then I get lucky. I do have a conscience and have even stopped it from escalating further than a hot and heavy make out session. I'm just not for commitment right now. My last relationship didn't end very well so I've decided to be single for a while.

My phone lit up and blared Irreplaceable; Kyla's idea…definitely not mine. I flipped it open while I made a mental note to convince her to let me change it.

"Hey Ky, what's up?"

She groaned into the phone, "Ugh Ash, please come over. The Idiot Brigade is back and I can feel my IQ dropping drastically."

"I'm sure your IQ is still intact genius," I lightly laughed. "I'll be over in a few just hang tight."

Yet another typical day in the life of Ashley Davies…