Okay so first of all I am very very very sorry about the delay, this chapter was really hard to write because it dealt with a lot of emotions of the boys and i wanted to get it right. I wrote and rewrote bits and pieces for a few days to see what would flow better, I'm still not sure if i nailed it, but I'm not sure what i'd do differently, so i'm sticking with this. I hope it works for you guys:)

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The yellow eyed demon kept eye contact with Dean as he walked towards him. Sam shuddered as the demon made his way over to his big brother. The memories of that night in the cabin were still vivid in Sam's mind and he wished to God he could be standing in between his brother and the demon right now.

"What's with the long face Dean?" mocked Hazazel. "This feel a little too familiar to you?"

"No, i-it's just your breath, i-it reeks!" Dean spat back with a smile. He wanted to say more, but talking made it hard to breathe. He hated that he sounded so weak, but he had to say something.

Hazazel just smiled.

"Always the funny one Dean Winchester. I know we left things unsettled, because your little brother over there decided to shoot me." He looked over at Sam and gave him a glare.

"The good thing is," he said as he turned back to Dean, "we can pick up right where we left off!"

Dean could feel his insides knotting at hearing those words and he could taste the blood from the day at the cabin. He remembered what it felt like as he was having his insides pulled out. He remembered the feeling of his insides literally ripping apart, and the pain…god the pain, that was the worst physical pain he had been in his entire life.

Sam saw Dean flinch and he hated that the demon could have that affect on his indestructible big brother. To say Sam was scared would be the understatement of the year. He had watched the demon rip his brother apart months ago while all he could do was stand by and watch, and now, now they were in the same positions as that night, and Sam wanted nothing more than to throw himself in front of Dean.

"You stay the hell away from Dean!" he snarled as he tried to divert the demon's attention to himself.

Sam smiled to himself as the demon turned his attention away from Dean and walked over to him.

"Sammy, Sammy, Sammy…what do you think you're doing? You don't need to act like you care about Dean, we all know you don't Sam."

"Oh god, and it starts" thought Dean to himself. He really didn't want to have to hear this. Dean had a feeling this was going to be another long tirade about how screwed up he is because of his family, and that's the last thing he needed to hear right now. But he knew he didn't really have a choice in the matter and there was nothing he could do but listen to everything they were saying.

"You don't know anything" Sam said calmly, he wasn't about to give the demon any satisfaction, and the demon was wrong, he'd die for his brother, and Dean knew that and that's all that mattered.

"No? You sure 'bout that? I think I know a lot more than you think. See you Sam…you're selfish, don't care 'bout nobody but yourself. Guess I can't really blame you, you probably inherited it from your father."

"You don't know anything about our dad!" Sam rose to John's defense.

Dean looked at Sam and let a small prideful smile lace across his face. It wasn't everyday he heard Sam stick up for their dad. Dean wanted to yell, he wanted to bitch at the demon, but he was tired, he was too tired to do anything right now, the only reason he was even standing up straight was because he was being held up by demonic force. Despite everything, his mind wasn't too tired to listen to the conversation going on in front of him, although in a few minutes he was going to wish it was.

"I think I know a little more than you give me credit for Sammy boy! You see, your daddy, he was selfish, just like you. He only cared about killing me to get revenge for your mom, kinda like you only care about killing me to get revenge for your girlfriend. WHICH by the way is quite hypocritical of you don't you think?" he asked as he walked back and forth between Sam and Dean. "How many times did you yell at your dad and Dean that what they were doing was dumb? That you didn't wanna be a part of it, that you didn't believe in avenging your mom's death because even if they killed me she was gone and not coming back?"

"And then your girlfriend dies and what do you do? Exact same thing daddy did! And you see you used to yell at Dean for wanting to get revenge on me but you never could see what it was really about for him could you? He's not like you and your dad, this was never about revenge for him, revenge was a bonus. He was fighting to keep his family together. He fought to keep you and your dad alive, fought to give your daddy some closure or whatever it is that you humans call it, and he fought so that no one would feel the pain he felt the day I ripped your precious little mommy out of his life! Personally, I think it's pathetic, why help others, they're all gonna die anyway. But that's not the point here, the point is that those were Dean's reasons and you degraded him everytime you yelled at him. There are very few people in this world he'll take shit from, you were one of them."

Sam swallowed the huge lump that had formed in his throat. The demon was right, it never was about revenge for Dean, it was always about family, Sam knew that now, he knew it before the demon said it, he just wish he had remembered that everytime he had yelled at Dean in the past.

"Anywho Samuel, as I was saying, you're just like John…you're father was obsessed, you are obsessed, he was willing to sacrifice himself to kill me, you are willing to sacrifice yourself to kill me…do you see where I'm going with this Sammy."

God he hated it when the demon called him that, hell he hated it when anyone called him that…well that was…anyone but Dean, when Dean said it, he loved it, not that he'd ever tell Dean that of course.

"Yeah I'm like my father, so what, that's not really breaking news," Sam snapped back trying to regain the control in his shaky voice.

"No, I guess not, but you know what the kicker is…both you and your dear ol' dad, you were two of a kind for sure, always wanting more, always wanting revenge, and neither of you stopped to realize that you were doing it at the expense of Dean. The brother you supposedly love o so much. Your dad didn't care about him, and you sure as hell don't."

"I don't need to justify anything to you! I love my brother, and he knows that, and that's all that matters."

"You sure he knows that or are you just assuming? And you can tell yourself as much as you want that you love him, but you don't."

"Shutup…just shutup!" thought Dean. He really hated being talked about like he wasn't even in the same room, like he couldn't hear every damn word they were saying.

"Go screw yourself!" Sam was getting sick of this demons bullshit.

"Testy, testy Sammy. I'm just being honest here. And if you do really love him, well then…you humans have a real messed up way of showing it. See even we as demons know that abandonment is the fastest way to betray someone, and well, how many times have you walked out on your brother? Let's ask Dean shall we?" he said turning his attention to Dean.

"Oh God he just had to go there!" thought Dean.

"Dean, how many times has little Sammy over here ditched you? Once...twice…three times? And how many times did dear ol daddy do the same?"

Dean didn't answer, he just just stared defiantly at the demon first, holding up the walls as much as possible but then looked at the ground, afraid that if he raised his eyes again the demon would see the truth in his words, see the years of pain embedded within his very own eyes.

Sam was looking over at Dean and his heart sank at the look in Dean's eyes. Dean had only looked at the demon briefly, but in those brief moments Sam saw the pain, the abandonment, the void. Sam hated this, knowing that this was mentally and emotionally breaking Dean, and knowing that he was the cause. Sam was mentally kicking himself as he ran through all the times that he had just walked out on Dean.

"See Sammy!" the demon said as he turned back around to face Sam. "You don't need to travel far to see why your brother's so emotionally crippled. Just take a look in the mirror and you'll the see the reason behind it…well…half of the reason behind it. The other half would be your daddy of course. Both of you were so hell bent on getting me and going after what you wanted that you never even stopped to take a look at Dean, he was just your collateral, your soldier. You guys broke him long before I got my hands on him!"

"You know when Dean looks in the mirror he can't stand the person looking back at him. You know that Dean doesn't think he deserves anything for himself and that if he wasn't a hunter that he'd be a disgrace to humanity. And who do you that's all thanks to Sammy?"

Sam didn't say anything. As much as he wanted to deny everything the demon was saying, he knew there was truth behind those words, but that last part…did Dean really think that he was a disgrace…no he couldn't think that…Sam looked over at Dean hoping, praying that he saw some defiance in Dean, anything to tell Sam that the demon was at least lying about that, but Dean's silence confirmed it all, and Sam felt his heart shatter…what had he and his dad done to his brother?

"Yeap, you guessed it, you and your daddy! For the past 24 years or so Dean's cared about one thing and one thing only, his family…well mostly you. Believe it or not he loves you more than he loved John."

Sam just stood there starring at the demon. He had never really looked at it that way, that Dean had loved him more, he just thought that Dean loved them equally.

" Ever since your daddy put you in Dean's arms and told him to run out of the house…since I set it on fire and all," he gleamed with excitement.

Sam and Dean both glared and Hazazel.

"Well since then, you've been all he's lived for, all he ever cared about. He doted on you, did what was always in your best interest, sacrificed everything for you, hell like I said you're the only person he ever took shit from."

Hazazel stepped a little closer to Sam.

"You remember all those things you used to yell at John about Dean being a mindless soldier, who was pathetic for always doing what your dad asked of him, how you never wanted to and never would be like that…well Dean used to hear it all, every single word of it, and it tore at him, you broke your brother with your words."

Sam stood motionless at what he was hearing. Dean heard all those things...o god" He looked over at his brother and saw Dean looking at the ground. Sam wanted to kill the demon with his bare hands, why the hell was he bringing up old wounds, especially things that Sam never meant and only spat out during his angry rebellious teenage years.

"You see," Hazazel continued. "Dean never brought any of it up because he didn't want you to feel guilty, but from the first time he heard you say that, he knew what you really thought of him, he knew you thought he was worthless, gutless…"

"SHUTUP!" yelled Sam with such ferocity that it even made Dean raise his head. "Just shut the hell up!"

Hazazel had this huge grin on his face.

"Did I push a button there Sammy?"

"You're wrong, yea I said those things, but I never meant any of it!" he said as he looked over at Dean. He was hoping to see Dean looking up at him…understanding…hear the truth behind his words…but all he was rewarded with was an even more defeated look on his brother's face. "God, Dean…don't listen to him…please"

Sam could try all he wanted to get the demon to shutup but he had messed up so much over the years that Hazazel had plenty of amo to shoot his way.

"Nice try there Sammy, who you trying to convince? You didn't mean it, yet when you guys were at the asylum you pretty much said the exact same words…hell you even tried to shoot your brother dead!"

"Tha-t wa-s Ellicott," piked up Dean. "How the hell does this damn demon know everything!"

Sam looked over at his brother, thankful that Dean finally spoke but the little bit of hope that was restored by his brother's words swiftly washed away when he really took a look at Dean who seemed paler than before. God Dean doesn't look good, I haveta get him outta here. It wasn't just the physical injuries that Sam was worried about, it was the emotional ones that were clearly taking their toll on his older brother. Sam knew that the demon had a lot more to say, and do, and he was scared shitless that if he didn't get Dean out of here soon…

"Oh who you trying to kid Dean!" said Hazazel as he stepped closer to Dean and Sam stiffened seeing the demon getting close to his brother again. "You know some part of Sam still believes all those things he said to your dad and what he said in the Asylum! You know it, and Sam knows it!"

Dean was looking Hazazel in the eye but he had to look away, he couldn't let him see the hurt and he couldn't let him see his fear that what he had just said is what Dean had been fearing since the day at the asylum.

Hazazel went on with his tirade.

"If you love your brother so much Sammy, why the hell did you just up and leave time and time again?" he said as he directed his attention back to Sam. "And the biggest of all, you leaving Dean for Stanford! Now that…that was amazing Sammy! I couldn't have hurt your brother more if I wanted to!" laughed Hazazel. "You know, right after you up and left, your dad started doing hunts on his own…and poor ol Deano here was left all by his lonesome. Not only had his precious brother ditched him but his daddy too."

Sam was clenching his fists at his side.

"I gotta hand it to you Sam, you and your dad, you guys got some huge hearts on you," sneered Hazazel sarcastically as he walked towards Dean.

"And the best part is no matter how much you and your dad walked out on him, no matter how many times you guys left Dean alone thinking that he had done something to drive you guys away…whenever you guys came back he was waiting with open arms like a pathetic good for nothing idiot who had no self worth outside of his brother and father," he said cupping Dean's face in his hands. Dean tried to struggle out of the hold but the demon's hold was too strong and he was too weak to even try and fight it off right now.

"And Dean could never even imagine walking out on the two of you. You could've done anything to make him wanna run away, but he never would because to him, family meant sticking together. So imagine his surprise when you and John had no problem walking away from him. Personally I think it's pathetic how much Dean put you two before himself, how much he devoted to you when all he got in return was betrayal"

Sam knew the truth in the demons words, and he hated it. He knew him and his dad had messed up over the years when it came to Dean, ok so enormously, gigantically messed up, but this demon, god he just knew so much.

"Oh and I saved the best for last. Your performance tonight Sammy…that was…I was speechless," he said as he actually smiled with what looked to Sam to be pride.

To see the demon smile with pride because of something Sam, especially something Sam did to hurt his brother, made him want to puke.

"I gotta admit though, I was a little insulted…I mean blaming Dean for Jess's death, instead of me? But you made up for it by saying that he was a bad brother. HAHAHHAA! That was like music to my ears, oh Sammy if only you could've seen your brother's face after that, I would've paid to see that, but because I'm me, I got a free show to it all."

"Oh God," thought Sam. "Dean…"

"You know what the best part was…Dean has been blaming himself for her death since it happened, but as long as little brother didn't blame him he was okay…and then you go and blame him! Oh Sam, may I say it was delightful watching your brother crash and burn after your little tirade this evening."

"Shutup," Sam replied quietly. That was all he could muster up to say. He thought that he had convinced Dean that in no way was Jess's death his fault, but not that that even really mattered now. Any convincing he would have done would've been flushed down the toilet the minute he opened his big mouth and blamed Dean for Jess's death. How the hell could he have done that. He didn't blame did at all, not one little bit. He was just angry and…and he lashed out and knew exactly where to hurt Dean. Sam really couldn't hate himself more than he did right now. As much as he wanted to kill the demon for purposely doing this, shoving everything back in Dean's face, Sam really had no one to blame but himself. These were his actions that were coming back to bite him in the ass, his actions that were breaking his brother. He knew what he had said to Dean, he also knew how he had just left. "I guess I should be used to this huh" God why was he always hurting Dean.

Dean didn't know how much more of this he could take. He had spent years hiding everything behind the 10 foot walls inside of him, only to have this damn demon display all his fears, his pain, his anguish, right in front of him, stripping him of his protective walls and leaving him bare and open, so that Sam could finally see just how broken, fragile, and pathetic his older brother was. Dean hung his head in shame…he just wanted all this to be over.

"You Sammy, you're the only one who can bring your brother down like that, make him feel like a worthless scumbag, and you know that don't you…you use it to your advantage when you're angry. You know how to hit him where it hurts…I admire that about you Sammy!"

Dean didn't want to be here right now…he really, really didn't.

Sam flinched at the familiarity of those last words. Dean had said those exact same words when Sam had ran away to find their dad in California. To say Sam felt like the worst little brother…hell the worst person in the world right now, was an understatement.

"See Sammy today was a perfect example of how little you care for your brother," he said as he came within a foot of Sam. "You know, awhile back Dean told you that he hoped you guys never found me if it meant that you got yourself killed…but you…you would risk him getting killed if it meant you getting to kill me and getting your revenge for Jessica wouldn't you," he accused.

"Shut the hell up," barked Sam. Now that was a lie, Sam had no doubt about that! The demon could throw it in his face how much he had messed up and hurt Dean over the years but he'd never…EVER…risk Dean's life for anything, not even for Jessica. Given any other day, any other situation Sam knew that Dean would know that too, but today shaping out the way it has and with the demon opening up tremendously huge wounds, Sam had to make sure that Dean knew.

"You can say whatever the hell you want, bring up all the times that I've hurt Dean all the times that I messed up, but I would never…EVER…risk my brother's life for ANYTHING!" he said with authority hoping that more than anything that Dean believed those words, because Sam meant them wholeheartedly.

"Really?" asked the demon. "Not even to bring pretty little Jessica back?"

Sam's eye widened at the way the demon had said that, it was almost as if…

"All this," said the demon spreading his hands apart. "All this has been for a reason Sammy…I have a little proposition for you."

Dean had slowly raised his head to watch what was going on mere feet away from him. The way Hazazel had said "bring Jessica back", it sent chills down Dean's spine, and despite all the emotional abuse he had just endured, despite the physical pain he was in, he was scared for Sam, he was scared at what the demon meant by those words, he was scared that the demon might get Sam's hopes up only to crush them.

"How would you like to have Jessica back in your life?" Hazazel practically glowed with happiness at the mixed looks he received from the brothers.

Both Sam and Dean's eyes shot up to Hazazel.

"W-what?" asked Sam actually stuttering.

"You heard me…you did tell Jessica you'd do anything to get her back didn't you?" he asked incredulously.

Dean swallowed the large lump that had formed in his throat, he knew that Sam was about to piece everything together.

"Wait…how did you…" And then it clicked, and he remembered what Dean had said to him. " I hate to say it Sam, but you have to keep in mind the possibility that yellow eyes is behind all of this, and that the Jessica in your dreams...that she's just a pawn of yellow eyes, an illusion."

"You son of a bitch! You…you put those in my head! This whole trip, the visions of that girl dying…it was all a TRICK!" yelled Sam.

"Well…yes and no…I did put those in your head…but that doesn't mean they can't come true."

How could he have been so stupid! God, he should've known better than to believe what he saw…he should have believed Dean…trusted Dean. Dean had been right all along and Sam had yelled at him for it, said hurtful things to him.

"Right…and why the hell would I ever trust you!" snapped Sam.

"Because if you do, I can give you her back, you can be together again."

Be together again…Those words hung in the air. Sam actually saw his vision blur a bit as tears started to form in his eyes. He tried his hardest to hide them, to show no emotion and vulnerability in front of the demon, especially when he had to save Dean, but he couldn't help it. Just the thought of having Jessica back in his life made his head spin and his heart race. To hold her again, kiss her again, just talk to her again…god he wanted to believe it so badly, that this demon could actually bring her back, but Sam was no idiot and he wasn't born yesterday, he knew demon's never wanted happy endings for people, especially not hunters, and in the Winchester world when a deal was two good to be true, it usually was, or at least had severe strings attached.

"Sammy what's the hold up, you do wanna be with her again don't you, I mean you told her you loved her…was that all a lie Samuel?"

Sam's eyes were wired shut. Shutup!

"Did you really not love her? Did you lie to her…did you not care about her at all…"

Shutup, shutup!! No he couldn't cry he wasn't going to break in front of this demon.

Dean looked over and saw Sam with his eyes shut tight, and he knew what Sam was doing. He was trying to drown out the voice of the demon, trying not to let that tear fall down his cheek, trying not to let himself break.

"I mean the girl DIED for you Sam…BECAUSE of you and you're gonna stand there and tell me that you didn't love her?"

Sam couldn't take it anymore.

"SHUTUP! SHUTUP! OF COURSE I LOVED HER! I LOVED HER WITH EVERYTHING I HAD! I WAS GOING TO ASK HER TO MARRY ME OF COURSE I FREAKING LOVED HER!" Sam yelled and then start panting from the lack of oxygen that little blow up had just caused. He didn't know why he felt like he had to defend himself to this demon, but he just…he really did love her.

"Could've fooled me Sammy boy!"

Dean's heart broke at hearing the utter devastation in his little brother's voice. Dean could handle the demon trying to break him, but not his brother, this was the worst possible torture for Dean. And then he remembered all those things the demon had shown him before Sam had arrived. All those times Sam was with Jessica, all the time he cried about her. He knew he had to do something…say something…

"W-why don't you j-just shut the hell up!" Dean said staring at the demon.

The demon and Sam turned their heads.

God he really wished that he didn't sound this weak, it really put a kink in trying to protect his little brother and getting the demon to take him seriously.

Sam looked at his brother and he began to feel even more guilty. Depite everything that had happened, despite everything Sam said to Dean and the wounds the demon had exposed, Dean was still there protecting him with all he had. Trying to turn the demon's attention to himself, trying to spare Sam the pain…he hated that Dean always did this, put his life in danger to save Sam, but it's also the type of big brother Dean was and he loved him for it.

"Dean, stay out of this, this is between me and your brother, and you really should save your breath…you're gonna need it," said the demon.

Dean was about to say something else when out of nowhere he felt what felt like an invisible foot hit his ribs and he started gasping for air.

"DEAN!" yelled Sam as he saw his brother struggle to get oxygen into his lungs. "YOU SON OF A…"

"SHUTUP SAM!...We weren't done! I asked you a question, do you want your girlfriend back or not?"

Sam was snarling at the demon and when he heard Dean's breathing return to normal he relaxed a little and let the demon's question really sink in.

"Well…"

"Of course I do," said Sam so quietly that the demon could barely hear it.

"What was…"

"OF COURSE I DO!"

"Much better," replied the demon with a smile. "Well like I said Sammy boy, lucky for you I can bring her back!"

Sam didn't know why his heart was starting to pound faster. He knew it was a trick…it just had to be…no way was this demon going to give him something he actually wanted…because well…that's just not what demons do.

"You know I can too Sam. I'm the most powerful demon in all of hell! I can do whatever I please, I mean hell I brought Dean back to you didn't I? He was dead, so I took your daddy in exchange for him and brought him back! So you see I do keep my end of deals!"

Sam couldn't argue with the fact that the demon had brought Dean back. Both him and Dean had known what happened to their dad and it was confirmed by the crossroads demon. If anyone had the power to bring back Jessica it was this demon that he was eye to eye with.

"Jess…he could bring…no!...no! what the hell am I thinking! He's a demon, snap out of it Sam!

"You think too much you know that Sam, sometimes you just gotta go with what you want."

"Why the hell would you wanna give me anything? I mean hell you're the one who took her away from me…now you wanna give her back? You can see how I'm hesitant here…and the fact that you're a freaking demon, why the hell would you ever do me a favour!" It was more of a rhetorical question but Sam knew he'd get an answer.

"First off…yes I took her away, but that was only cuz she got in my way at the time. Secondly, I don't do favours, I make deals when it works in my favour, so I'm willing to make a deal with you, well more of a trade," he said smiling.

Dean was looking from the demon to Sam and back. "Sammy…"

"A trade?" Sam asked incredulously. "I don't see how I'm gonna get to be with Jessica if I'm dead or if I go darkside." He stated matter of factly.

"That's not what I'm asking for Sam."

"Oh thank god," thought Dean, he didn't understand it and he knew it sounded like a hoax but…what if it wasn't. Maybe all the beating he'd received was messing with his head.

"You're not the only special kid out there you know. Sure I wanted you to be the boy king, the leader to my army, but something more important has come up. I need something more than I need you to be a leader. I have other special children, one of them can lead my army. Sure I'd prefer you, but hey, it's not the end of the world if I don't get you. I mean what kinda leader would I be if I didn't roll with the punches? Something more important has come up, something so important that I'm willing to let you go, rid you of your destiny, give you your little girlfriend back."

Sam didn't know what to say, this was all way too good to be true. All of a sudden the demon's had a change of mind? No, it couldn't be…it just couldn't be…could it? Did the demon really want something that much that he was willing to give Sam Jessica back? Sam was speechless, this has to be a trick, it just has to. What was this something that was so important, Sam knew it must be something big if the demon was actually willing to leave him alone for it. Sam finally found his voice.

Sam raised an eyebrow. "If you don't want me dead, and don't want me to lead your damn army, what the hell do you want? I mean you have the friggin colt already, what else is there?"

Hazazel just stood there staring at Sam for what seemed like forever until he shifted his eyes, and Sam's eyes followed.

Sam's eyes widened in horror and he felt his heart sink as he looked at Hazazel's evil grin and realized what he wanted.

"NO…NO…NOT DEAN…Y-YOU CAN'T HAVE DEAN!"

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TBC