Intermezzo I - Ignorance is bliss
Part Five
A/N: The final part of this short story. Once more, I would like to thank not only those who reviewed this story, but my dear inspiring friends from the fan fiction forum. This would not be half as entertaining if it weren´t for you!
Disclaimer: See chapter 1.
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The indifference of men, far more than their tyranny, is the torment of women.
Jules Michelet
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Perfect behaviour is born of complete indifference.
Cesare Pavese
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"One step forward, two steps back," Maria muttered a few days later, as she left Captain von Trapp´s study. If that was his idea of a Viennese waltz, it was a very strange one, although she was anything but an expert in what was called the forbidden dance not long agi. No, not exactly a waltz – it felt to her that here was a silent war going on between them.
She tried to speak to him about her idea of staging a puppet show with the children. It was something she knew she could do well, because she and the other postulants used to work with puppets at the orphanage. It was not only fun, but a very effective way to be able to reach children who were usually traumatized and had difficulty expressing themselves. The Captain, however, did not even look up from his morning paper, during, or after she had made her request.
"You do what you will Fräulein. As long as you never invade study again," he replied tersely.
"Yes, most definitely a war," she thought. At least if he was not resorting to words such as invasion to describe her actions. She felt herself pale, felt her heart drop at his unexpected abruptness. Even Herr Detweiler, who witnessed the scene, raised his eyes from the book he was reading to give her a sympathetic look.
"Very well, Captain," she said, turning around quickly to leave immediately. Unfortunately, her foot caught on the carpet as she made her quick turn and she ended up sprawling on the carpeted floor. She braced herself to hear the usual "Fräulein!" bellow. Much to her dismay, nothing happened. No shout, not even an angry scowl. His head was still buried behind the newspaper.
"I'm sorry, Captain," she muttered, as she left.
What was she expecting? That he would change instantly, just because he saw his seven children singing in tune in front of his bride-to-be? That he would magically turn into that loving father, that almost mythical man the children never tired of telling her tales about? She knew it would not happen like that. Yet, why was she so upset, so about his cold treatment? Why did she care? Her employer seemed to have developed multiple personalities all of a sudden, and none of them seemed to like her very much. It hurt like hell, and she did not know why.
She simply could not understand. Only three days ago, he had welcomed her there in his study, and showed no reluctance to argue about some extremely delicate aspects of the children's education. He had even placed his trust her better judgment to deal with the matter herself. Two days ago, they had a bizarre conversation in the nursery about the same subject. Yes, he had laughed at her, he had treated her with his usual sarcasm, but at least he had been aware of her existence, he had acknowledged her presence, even though that annoying smirk in his face was enough to drive her crazy. This coldness, this hauteur towards her was something that was almost entirely new. He had treated her like that in the few moments she was in the house, but not ever since.
"So, what did he say?" asked Liesl expectantly, as Maria, scratching her head, still a bit dazed, entered the nursery.
"I believe his exact words were "you do what you will, Fräulein"," Maria said, mimicking his voice. "In my opinion, we can take that as a yes."
"Well, he did not say no, did he?" Brigitta observed. "He did not say anything else?"
"Mm hm!"
"That is not like him at all. Did you mention that we would have to use the ballroom?"
"Yes, I did, Louisa, it was the very first thing I did."
"What is the matter with him?" muttered Louisa, as if to herself.
"Yes, why did he brush you off like that? I can't understand," moaned Brigitta.
"We thought he had changed. You said he would if he heard us sing," said Kurt.
"I said it would help, and it has," Maria tried to reassure the children even though she was not quite so sure anymore. "Come on, cheer up! We have permission for our puppet show, haven't we? Well, at least I think we have He did not say "no, absolutely out of the question, Fräulein!"" She looked heavenward. "Oh Lord, please let me be right about this one!"
"We still can't have a puppet show without puppets, Fräulein!"
"Very well observed, Friedrich. Yes, we'll have to… to think about that one too! Maybe… maybe we can make them ourselves, what do you think about that idea?"
The children, however, were too worried to get excited about Maria's plans, and they went on arguing about their father.
"He is almost like the old Captain again. Any time now he will order us to wear the uniforms and he'll start blowing the whistle again," spoke Kurt.
"I think the Baroness has something to do with it," chimed in Marta, wide eyed.
"No, silly, the Baroness has nothing to do with it," Louisa retorted knowingly. Her siblings stared at her. "Forget the Baroness… What Liesl?"
"I cannot believe what you just said. Only one week ago you were chasing beetles to place under her pillow!" Liesl exclaimed.
"Oh, I am not worried about her anymore. Father will not marry her. She will not be our new mother."
"How can you possibly know that, genius?" asked Friedrich. "Has Frau Schmidt been reading her cards to you again?"
Nose up in the air, Louisa chose to ignore her brother, giving him a haughty look. "It is meant to be a secret, Friedrich, between Fräulein Maria and me," she said mimicking her father (1).
"Louisa, please," Maria admonished. "Remember our little talk the other day?"
It was Maria's turn to be subjected to their curious looks. She did not know it was because she had just said that Louisa – who talked to no one – had actually had a little talk with her, or if because a secret had been mention. A secret about her father. Oh, it was hardly a secret at all, but Maria still chose to avoid the subject.
"You must give the Captain a little time, children. Your father is…" she searched for the right word, "… digesting. I suppose we made too many changes, too quickly. Singing, play clothes, climbing trees, falling from boats, and now marionettes…. Maybe we should have let him adjust to them little by little, instead of expecting him to adapt all at once."
"I don't know, Fräulein," Liesl intervened. "He seems to be just fine with us. He now loves it when we talk to him and when we sing. He even asks us to do it when you are not around. I hate to tell you, but I think it is you he is mad at."
"Me?!" Maria exclaimed stunned. It had been nothing that she had realized herself, but she was impressed that the children had noticed it as well.
"Yes," the other children promptly agreed, their faces worried.
"Oh, He would have already sent me away if that were any true, don't you think?"
Liesl did not answer, and the others looked at each another uncertainly. Maria had to admit that the girl had a point. The awful silence treatment seemed to be for her only. The reason why the Captain was spending so little time with the children was, oddly enough, her presence. Since the children were what mattered the most, she began walking away when their father approached them, because she realized he would not do so if she were around. It worked wonders, and she smiled in relief whenever she saw the Captain bonding with the children, from a distance.
"Oh, he is merely treating you like any other governess," she told herself one day. "Why do you think you are any different than the previous eleven? Whenever one of the parents is around, what is the need of a governess getting in the way? That must be how it works in distinguished homes."
When she thought about his peculiar behavior from this angle, it made a lot of sense. It hurt her feelings, but it was something she would have to learn with. She had never been a governess before, and she assumed that is what it was like. The children were his family, not hers. She was just a temporary help, nothing more than that, someone who did not even belong to their social circle. At this moment, the Captain was probably only keeping her there only because the Reverend Mother had agreed that she should be with the family until September. She would not be surprised if he were counting the days until he would be able to get rid of her. If she had helped him to realize he wanted to get reacquainted with his sons and daughters, her work was done, and now he did not have to share them with a convent girl like her. It made much more sense to do what he was doing now, constantly, trying to bring the Baroness into their family circle, and doing everything to keep her out of it, unless her presence was absolutely necessary.
Naturally, the Captain's haughty treatment had been reserved for Maria only, and that only helped to support her theory. With his future bride, on the other hand, he was the perfect gentleman, never neglecting her for a moment longer than necessary, always making sure that she was not bored by the country life. He pampered her all the time with flowers and gifts. With Max as a chaperon, they went to Salzburg almost every evening, to attend a concert, followed by dinner, so that the evening family meals became quite rare.
The Captain's behavior towards Baroness Schraeder did not go unnoticed by the other servants. Maria tried to ignore the gossip and idle talk as much as possible, until it became inevitable. One day she was helping one of the maids to fold the children's clothes, when the girl turned to her and asked.
"What do you think, Maria? Are they or are they not?" It was obvious that the girl had been talking about the Captain and the Baroness.
"Are they or are they not what, Katya?"
"Lovers," she whispered to Maria, and giggled. Maria blushed to the roots of her hair.
"Ow! Of course not!" had been her indignant answer. "The Captain is a gentleman. He… he would not dare to do that with his children around!"
"I'm sorry; I forgot you came from a convent!" Katya shrugged. "He is no saint, you know. Before he married the first Baroness, he…"
Their conversation was interrupted when Frau Schmidt entered the room, and Maria vowed she would never listen to such disturbing talk ever again, let alone participate in it. Like everything else, it had the absurd power to hurt her. How dare he do such a thing to the children?
He wouldn't dare… would he?
Meanwhile, the silent war continued.
Gretl was the one to speak up. It happened one day after dinner, when he gave Maria a particularly curt answer to a simple question about the children's bedtime. The little one's reaction had been immediate:
"We don't like it when you are mean to Fräulein Maria, father!"
Marta, usually shy, was encouraged by Gretl's outspokenness and added. "Yes. And we don't like it that you don't let her stay around when you are playing with us."
The Captain raised his eyebrows. Maria thought it was the only reaction she would get, considering his indifferent behavior the past few days. It was either that or she should brace herself for an explosion. But then his piercing gaze immediately fixed on her, for the first time since that conversation in the nursery. There it was, that funny feeling in the pit of her stomach again, which made her place both hands there. She took a little step back.
"Am I being mean to you - Fräulein?" he asked her sarcastically.
"You are ignoring her, father, and that is not nice!" protested Louisa, before Maria could answer.
"Children, please," she said, noticing that he was increasingly annoyed by the way the children had jumped to her defense. She turned to him "Oh no, Captain!"
"Is that what you think? That I am ignoring you?" He asked quizzically. Maria had a feeling that he knew exactly what she was talking about, and that it surprised him that his behavior towards her would even be noticed.
"You… You…" No, lying to him would not work – yes, she did think he was ignoring her, but somehow she could not bring herself to confront him about that. Not while he kept his infernal staring, that made it difficult for her to even breathe. Usually she did not have this difficulty being honest; it was not like her at all.
"Yes?" he insisted.
"You are just being you, Captain." she said, the closest thing to the truth she could come up with.
"Mmm…"
He marched out of the room, and the conversation ended there. Only after she was half way up the stairs she realized that she indeed must have forgotten how to breathe, because she had to stop for air.
That same evening, Maria overheard him talking to Marta and Gretl about the question which had, somewhat, triggered his odd behavior. What she heard was enough to set her mind at ease, for while – whatever happened, the children would the fine, she became sure of it. She had gone to tuck them in bed and read the usual bed time fairy tale, but she was at the door, she realized that he was already there. She would have walked away, but the sound of her name in Gretl´s voice made her stop just outside the door.
"Do you promise you will be nicer to Fräulein Maria?"
"Yes, darling, I promise," he replied very seriously. This time it was simply the seriousness in his voice, and not the look in his eyes, that was the cause of that funny feeling in the pit of her stomach.
"Now can you please answer my question, father?" she heard Marta asking.
"You see, poppet, your papa loved your mother very, very, very much. Because of that, he decided to plant a seed in her belly. One for each one the seven of you." (2)
"It is what Herr Schmidt does to grow tomatoes in the orchard!" exclaimed Marta.
"Liesl does not look like a tomato," protested Gretl.
"Kurt does, when he stays in the sun for too long!"
From the door, Maria stifled a giggle. She leaned against the wall, and listened. "Very well, Captain, show me how it's done," she thought.
"But father," started Marta.
"Here we go," Maria thought amusedly. "Let me see how you talk yourself out of this one!"
"Yes Marta?"
"What did you have to do to water mother's orchard?"
"And how did you plant the seed in her tummy?"
Maria would have given him anything to see his face at the moment. The Captain, however, surprised her again – he knew just what to say, he did not even flinch.
"Oh, that is simple. We grown ups have a special kind of cuddle when we want to do that…"
"You mean… kissing?" asked Marta.
"That too…"
Maria chose this moment to step away from the door. Days ago she had censored him for eavesdropping, and now, there she, was, doing the same thing. The fact still bothered her – why did he insist that she took care of the matter, when he could have done it, and so brilliantly?
Shaking her head, she walked to Brigitta and Louisa's room, in order to finish her duties for the night.
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A/N: (1) This will be another story. Intermezzo II or III. The title will be something like Cards never lie. Still a project. (2) The Captain´s explanation, and the outcome of it, was inspired in a letter from a mother I read online. Unfortunately, I do not have the link for it anymore.