You people are making me depressed. I mean, come on! D: Two people total reviewed my last chapter, and no one reviewed chapter nine. Is my writing slipping or something? -sobs- I FEEL LONELLLLYYYYYY.
Nathaniel had dismissed Bartimaeus and boarded the plane with Kitty and Jakob, along with their luggage. It was relatively boring, to say the least. Nathaniel missed Bartimaeus the whole time, even if it was nice to not have to worry about getting jumped constantly. They arrived a few hours later, taking a taxi to the flat they rented for this trip. Currently, they were having a bit of trouble getting Nathaniel's bag out of the trunk.
"Gosh! What do you have in this thing? Bricks? It's so bulky; it just won't… come out!" Jakob yanked at the strap angrily, not getting anywhere.
Nathaniel sighed. "It's summoning equipment. I still have to summon Barty again, you know. Move, I'll get it. You two go on inside and start getting situated."
"Alright, but when you break your back with that thing, I'll say I told you so," Kitty informed him, slinging her bag over her shoulder. Jakob followed suit, rubbing his back sorely, following Kitty inside.
Nathaniel yanked at his bag's strap, examining it. Maybe if he turned around and wrapped the strap around his waist, he could… He did so, digging his heels into the pavement, pulling with all his strength.
If only he had Barty here! Then it'd be no problem for the djinni. The taxi driver gave an impatient yell, and Nathaniel almost went horizontal with how much weight he was putting into it. Finally, he felt the bag give a slight lurch, and he tugged harder. All of a sudden, the bag came free, sliding across the sidewalk and landing Nathaniel on his backside.
He groaned and looked up blearily. Apparently, he had landed right at the feet of a man, who was looking at him with amusement. He had black, swept-back hair, a black T-shirt, and a normal pair of jeans. His T-shirt showed off his muscles nicely. Nathaniel blinked stupidly.
"Hello…" he ventured meekly.
"Hi," the man replied, raising an eyebrow. He strolled around Nathaniel and picked up his bag easily, holding it out to him with one hand. "I assume this is yours?" he asked politely. Nathaniel nodded and got up, his backside still sore.
"Yeah, thanks. I'll just be taking that," he said, grabbing the bag's strap. The man let go, and it immediately hit the ground. Nathaniel groaned and pulled the strap over his shoulder, trying to drag all his stuff down the sidewalk, and failing miserably. The man chuckled and shook his head.
"I'd help you, kid, but I have to be going. Have fun with that." The man simply walked away, slamming the taxi's trunk closed on the way. Nathaniel sighed and commenced pulling his stuff in the hotel door. It was slightly easier on the smooth tiled floor. In the end, he managed to get to their room without dying.
"Next time, remind me not to bring so much stuff," Nathaniel huffed, flopping onto his bed. He had only gotten his bag as far as the doorway before his arms gave out.
"I told you so," Kitty replied smugly. After a bit of rest, Nathaniel got the energy to pull out his summoning stuff, and skipping all the protective spells, he drew two pentacles on the floor and summoned Bartimaeus. Instantly, the djinni pounced on him.
"Why, hello there, Natty-boy. Fancy seeing you here," he said casually. He was straddling Nathaniel's waist, playing with the hem of his shirt, and smiling innocently.
Nathaniel blushed madly. "Yeah, whatever, just get off. We are here on business, not a vacation. We have to make a plan on how we'll get Flamel out of the hospital."
Bartimaeus sighed. "It seems everything is about work nowadays. When will we ever get alone time, when you aren't asleep or eating, huh? Djinn have sexual frustrations too, buddy."
Nathaniel's face was a dark red by now. He squeaked and tried to wiggle out from under Bartimaeus, but didn't get very far. "Bartimaeus! Let me go…" he whined, glancing angrily at Kitty and Jakob who were staring at them in amusement.
Bart sniffled and got up. "Fine. But mark my words, kid. You're getting raped as soon as we get back to London." With that, the djinni strutted over to the bed and plopped down, crossing his arms and legs in an aggressive manner. Nathaniel sighed. He got up and flopped down on the bed next to Bart.
"So. How're we going to kidnap Flamel from the hospital?" he asked, rolling over limply. Bartimaeus raised a hand.
"I can cast an illusion on him and he can just walk out the front door," he stated.
"Yes, well, how are we going to get to see him in order to tell him you're casting an illusion on him?"
"Uh…"
"Didn't think so."
"We could claim to be family," Kitty offered.
"We don't even know what he looks like," Jakob said. "What if they start asking us about him, or how we're related?"
"Bartimaeus could sneak a peek in his window and turn into someone that could be his brother. Then I could claim to be Flamel's nephew," Nathaniel said. "I'm afraid we can't all go in at the same time. We could pull off one distant relative that looks nothing like him, but not three."
"So I have to be your father?!" Bart asked, seemingly having a heart attack.
"So you'll go in, tell Flamel you're sneaking him out, cast an illusion, and hold the door open for a ridiculously long amount of time?" Kitty asked.
"Yeah, basically," Nathaniel grunted.
"Well, that was easy," Jake muttered. "What are Kitty and I supposed to do during this time?" There was a pause of silence.
Bartimaeus shook his head sadly. "Oh, Jake. Little, naïve Jakey. Think like me. It'll come to you." Kitty fell off the bed, opting to examine dust particles on the floor while Jakob turned a weird purple color. Nathaniel muttered something about 'stealing Jack Sparrow's lines.'
"Right," Nathaniel announced, trying to break up the awkward silence. "So if that's our entire plan, let's go. I don't want to waste any time here. Everything's so… depressing."
"I think you just want to get back to London so I'll have an excuse to—"
"I BELIEVE IT IS TIME FOR THE DJINNI TO DO WHAT HE'S TOLD NOW!" Nathaniel screeched, blushing madly. He jumped up and shoved Bartimaeus towards the door. Kitty giggled and popped up from under the bed.
"I'm with Barty on this one, Nathaniel. Have fun breaking immortal old guys out of hospitals!" she declared, waving brightly. Bart turned back to give the others a bit of advice.
"Remember—use safe sex! We don't want Kitty getting pregnant, do we? Besides—"
Nathaniel gave one last shove, and they were outside. He slammed the door closed, cutting Bartimaeus off. There was a loud smack from the hallway that echoed slightly, and a pained 'ouch.' Kitty and Jakob looked at each other, blushed, and went back to pretending the other didn't exist.
"You really need to control your mouth," Nathaniel advised Bartimaeus bitterly.
"Where's the fun in that?"
"I don't get mentally scarred every few seconds. That's what's fun about it." Nathaniel grabbed Bartimaeus's hand, though, and they walked together in silence to the hospital Flamel was supposed to be kept in. Nathaniel loitered around at a café across the street as Bartimaeus turned into a lizard and scaled the building.
Nathaniel bought himself some tea and sat around for five minutes until and fourty-something year old man with messy red hair, a flannel shirt, and jeans walked over and sat across from him. Nathaniel raised an eyebrow.
"Bartimaeus?" he asked hesitantly.
"No, it's Michael Phelps. Of course it's me! Who else would it be?"
"Who's Michael Phelps?"
"…You need to get out more. Seriously, let's just go."
Nathaniel got up and followed Bartimaeus out, frowning. "Is this Michael Phelps someone I should know about?"
"Nathaniel, shut up. Technically, I'm supposed to be your father right now, so I can smack you around if you misbehave."
Nathaniel sighed. "You're enjoying this way too much, aren't you?"
"Of course." Bartimaeus held the hospital doors open for Nathaniel, grinning stupidly. At first, Natty thought this was kind of nice, until he was almost blinded with how white everything was. Apparently, Bart had simply used Nathaniel as a shield from the blinding whiteness.
"What is with hospital people and the color white?" Nathaniel huffed irritably. He stalked up to the front desk, Bartimaeus trailing along behind.
"Hello, miss," Bart greeting politely. They even had a preppy blonde girl for the front desk in this hospital, too! Déjà vu, much? "We're here to see that unknown guy that fell from the eight story window. I'm his brother, and this is my son," he said, ruffling Nathaniel's hair affectionately, who just shoved his hand away with a grunt.
The girl looked him up and down suspiciously. "Oh? That man hasn't told anyone his name, or anything about him, really. Do you have anything that can prove you're related?"
"Hm. Well, I can give you a description of him. He's kind of short, not too fat or skinny or anything, quite normal. Red hair, brown eyes… hm… he has a birthmark on the back on his neck, too. He always looks a bit angry, or getting ready to chuck something at you," Bartimaeus said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.
"Alright, can you give us his and your names?"
"Nick Framer," Nathaniel answered instantly, surprising Bartimaeus. "I'm John Framer, and my dad is Bert Framer." The girl nodded and scribbled it down. She called over a nurse and whispered to her a bit, handing her the paper. The nurse scuttled off to do her bidding, the lady going back to sitting and staring around uncaringly. A few minutes later, the nurse came back and nodded at the lady.
"Mr. Framer denied having any relatives, but as soon as he heard your names, he perked up a bit," she said.
The lady reluctantly told them they could go in and see him, telling them Flamel's room number. They thanked her and made their way towards their destination.
"Where did that Framer stuff come from?" Bart whispered to him once they were out of earshot.
"L's are the same as R's in Japanese. Flamel, Framer. I guessed that anyone who lives as long as Flamel should have learned at least a little Japanese."
"Oh…" They continued on in silence.
Nathaniel felt a bit excited. If this really was a legendary Alchemist that found the secret to staying young forever, he would be one of the first to see him and know who he was in the last few hundred years. This was a once in a lifetime thing here. Who else would get the chance to meet a 700 year old famous Alchemist? Anyone? Let's see a show of hands, people.
…
Exactly. Once they finally got to the right door and Bartimaeus grasped the doorknob, Nathaniel couldn't help but bounce up and down impatiently.