Chapter 7

I moan and open my eyes. I find myself waking up in my bed with a horrible headache. Ugh, what happened?

"Nate," I hear someone calling my name.

I turn over. The person was talking, but I couldn't understand what they were saying. Their voice seemed off in the distance, and it echoed. They keep calling my name, but I am way too exhausted to answer.

When they start shaking me, I let an incoherent noise escape my lips.

"Goodness, you're alive," I hear someone say.

That voice… it's so familiar.

Wanting to satisfy my curiosity, I slowly open my eyes. They close almost instantly, but I fight to keep them back open. Standing there in front of me is Caitlyn.

"Hi," she smiles.

I grunt and close my eyes.

"Wow," Caitlyn says. "At least you're alive. I was so close to calling 9-1-1."

"Don't do that," I manage to croak out.

"Well you're talking to me, so I don't plan on it."

I'd talk to her, but right now I'm way too tired to say anything.

"So I take it you're still not better?"

"Worse. I feel like an elephant sat on me."

"Wow."

"I feel like I'm about to die."

"Most people feel that way when they're really sick."

I don't answer to that, and Caitlyn feels my forehead. "You're really, really warm. And you're sweating like crazy."

"Meh."

"Should I go get Jason?"

I nod. "Yeah." I pull the covers off of me. "Now excuse me while I barf my stomach lining out." I head over to the bathroom and puke my inners into the toilet, flushing occasionally.

Caitlyn hands me a roll of toilet paper. "You have some puke on your face."

I wipe it off and continue barfing. I must have thrown up at least six times before Caitlyn says, "Wow, do you have a really bad hangover or what?"

I shake my head. "I haven't drunken any alcohol in the past… well, in forever. And I don't remember anything from yesterday – I must have been sleeping all day."

"Look," Caitlyn says, "as much fun as this is, watching you puke, I'm going to go get Jason. This is crazy."

She leaves me alone to throw up two more times until Jason comes into my room. "Nate?" he asks.

I respond my putting more of my stomach's contents into the toilet.

Jason kneels down next to me. "Nate, are you okay?"

I shake my head.

He frowns. "I'll go call Doctor Schneider. She'll know what to do."

Yes, go call Doctor Hilary Duff so you can flirt with her some more.

Jason takes out his phone. "Hey, Penelope? Yeah, Nate's still really sick… sicker than before. I'm getting really worried… Okay, thanks. Bye." He turns to me. "She's coming over right now."

It's about time. My throat not only tastes like barf, but it also feels like it's on fire.

Jason grabs my arm. "Come on, let's go lie down." He helps me back up to my feet and carries me over to my bed, setting me down gently under the covers.

Time sure flies when you're delirious, because the next thing I know, Dr. Hilary Duff is standing next to me, checking my temperature.

"It's awfully high," she says.

Huh? I didn't catch anything she just said. Something about fuzzy socks.

"No… no…" I say.

"No?" Hilary Duff says. "What are you talking about?"

"No, I don't want your fuzzy slippers."

"Nate, what are you saying?" I hear Jason ask.

"I can't understand your accent," I say. "No eating fuzzy slippers, bad Caitlyn." I whimper a bit. "Head hurts." I bet I look really sweaty, flushed, and gross right now. I can imagine what I look like – my hair looks like a wet poodle. Covered with sweat. Which so isn't cool if you're trying to impress a girl. Ahem, Caitlyn.

"When did your headache start?" Dr. Hilary asks.

"I dunno. Like…" I just trail off, too tired to say really anything.

Hilary turns to Jason. "His high fever worries me. I think it'd be better off if he went to the hospital."

"What ever you think is best," Jason says.

Hilary Duff speaks to me. "Hey, Nate, we're going to go to the hospital now. Can you get out of bed?"

I moan and try to move. I sit up and put my legs off the side of the bed, trying to catch my breath. I eventually walk two feet before swaying a bit. I hang onto the closet person – who just so happened to be Hilary Duff – and she helps me walk out of the room. I grab my shoes – my man Uggs to be exact.

Yeah, I have Uggs. Jealous?

They're Muggs.

Anyway, I pull my shoes on and I attempt to walk down the stairs. When I struggle a bit to stay conscious, Jason just picks me up and carries me down.

I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I know, I'm waking up in a hospital bed with Jason and Caitlyn sleeping in chairs to my right.

Jason is snoring softly and Caitlyn has a bit of drool on her face.

I decide that it's best not to wake them up because when I look outside, it's pitch black, which means it's really late.

I do, however, feel kinda bad. Not because of the headache, but because of the fact that the two people I care about the most are sleeping in small arm chairs, awkwardly, and it's all my fault.

Then, Doctor Jason Likes To Flirt With Me walks into my room. "Oh, Nate! You're finally awake!" she says when she sees me staring out the window like a retard, watching the snow fall.

I turn to her. "Yeah."

"How are you feeling?" she asks, writing on something or other.

"Much better, actually. I don't know how you people do it. It's magical."

She laughs a bit. "Magical, eh?"

I nod. "Spend one night here and my headache's gone and I'm not sweating like five Inuits in the middle of Arizona during July."

"Nice simile."

"Thanks. I try."

"So," Hilary Duff says, "do you want to hear the good news or the bad news first?"

"Good news."

"Okay. Good news is we got your fever down to a normal temperature and you're not going to die."

"Well that's some pretty good news as far as good news goes."

"Yeah, but the bad news is we found traces of ecstasy in your body." I freeze up. "Yeah. Busted."

"What are you talking about?" I didn't take any drugs.

"I checked it personally three times. Nate, do you realize that ecstasy is illegal?"

I nod. "Yup. Learned about it in health."

"Then you know what it can do?"

"Yup."

"Well then you know that it suppresses your immune system which isn't good if you're already sick. It's probably why you got sicker so suddenly."

"That would explain why."

"Well, the thing is, I know you took it. Tell me the truth here about it and maybe I won't kill you too harshly."

"I seriously have no idea whatsoever as to why I would take it. Maybe because I didn't. I was asleep all day yesterday."

"I heard about the party."

"What party – oohhh. Yeah. That one."

Hilary nods. "Mmm hmm…"

"There was a party, but no, I stayed in bed all day like a good little sick person. I remember kicking some people out of my room, but other than that I was sleeping." Really, honestly. I was telling the truth. I slept the whole time. Well, I do remember getting up to drink some orange juice, but that's it.

"And I also heard that party got a little out of hand… cops showed up," Hilary continues.

Huh? I don't remember anything about cops. "They did? Since when?"

"Don't act like you don't know anything," she says kind of harshly.

"But… I don't."

"Look, I'm not going to tell Jason if that's what you mean."

"Don't tell Jason about what?"

"About the party and the police."

"Okay, but I still don't know what you're talking about."

Police? Is she crazy? No police came to my house last night…

Doctor Hilary Duff stares me down a bit. I stare right back.

"Okay, then," she says, putting the binder she was writing in down. "We'll play this game."

"Huh?" I ask.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she says, crossing her arms across her chest.

"Wait, what?"

"Nate, you do not make any sense."

"I have no idea what we're-"

"Anyway, you better get some sleep. It's past three in the morning."

"But I still don't underst-"

Doctor Hilary Duff lets out a huff of laughter. "Stop being silly, Nate. Just go back to sleep, kay?"

I'm more lost than a sheep in a snow storm in the middle of August.

"I'll be back tomorrow to check on you," Hilary says and walks out the door.

"Wait! Don't walk away; I need to know wh-" I stop when she closes the door.

That might have been the most confusing conversation I think I've ever had.

I look over and see that Jason is still snoring away. (That's kinda embarrassing considering the fact that he likes Doctor Hilary Duff.)

Well, there's no use in staying up if everyone else is asleep.

X X X

I open my eyes and see two empty seats where Caitlyn and Jason once were. I flip over onto my back and see Doctor Schneider standing there looking through some drawers.

"Good morning," I say, sleepily. I yawn. The sun was shining through the window and it was pissing me off.

She turns around and closes the drawer with her hip. "Hello. How are you feeling today?"

"The same as I was four hours ago," I say, messing with the blue blanket that was laid on top of me. There was a little bit of fuzz on it, and I had to get it off.

"You were up four hours ago?" she asks.

"Umm… yes. We were talking."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she says. Doctor Hilary winks at me.

Ooh, I get it now.

Yeah, that conversation 'never happened.'

"Where are Jason and Caitlyn?" I ask, pointing to the empty chairs.

"They went out for breakfast. They left like an hour ago so they should be back soon."

"Oh, okay."

"Speak of the devil," Dr. Schneider smiles when they walk through the door.

Isn't it weird how you'll be talking about someone and then they'll show up right next to you?

"You're awake, Natey," Jason says when he sees me. When Dr. Schneider turns around he blushes a bit. "Good morning, Penelope."

Caitlyn comes over and hugs me. "Nate, I'm so glad you're alive! I thought you died!"

I pat her on the back. "It's okay, Caitlyn."

"I was so worried about you, Nate! You don't even know!"

"There, there," I say awkwardly. "It's all okay now."

Caitlyn slaps me across the face. "Don't you ever do anything stupid like falling into a pool again, you got me?"

"Gees, woman, chill!" I say, my hand over my now-sore cheek.

She pulls me into another tight hug. "God, I love you."

Five minutes later and we're all sitting around chatting about good things, nice things. Things like Christmas and the New Year's.

Jason keeps making googly eyes at Dr. Schneider – his sad attempt at flirting – and it makes me gag.

"Question," I say, having everyone turn his or her attention to me. "Can I like get up and walk around or is that illegal?"

"Yeah. You can walk around if you're feeling okay," Hilary says.

"Good," I say, getting out of bed. "It's nice standing up for a change." I still wasn't one hundred percent better, but all I really wanted to do was go do something dangerous. "Let's go walk around, Caitlyn."

"Okay," Caitlyn says, hopping out of her chair.

We both leave the room and go down the main hall.

When we're far away from the room, I turn to Caitlyn. "I want to go do something dangerous."

She let's out a huff of laughter. "Pogo sticking into a cold pool and getting a fever high enough to get you hospitalized wasn't dangerous enough for you?"

I shake my head. "I want to run away and never look back."

"Hmm…" Caitlyn says. "I can see… yes."

"See what?"

"Where your insanity comes from."

"Oh, screw you. Let's go outside. I'll race you!" I begin walking really fast and then go to a jog. I look back and see Caitlyn just walking down the hall with her hands in her jacket pocket. I stop jogging as I get winded. I stand still and bend over a bit, catching my breath. Good lord, I feel like I just ran up a mountain.

Caitlyn comes up to me and pats me on the back. "Let's just stick to the walking for now. Goddamn, you're like an old person."

I point an accusing finger at her. "I am not an old hag."

"You might as well be," she says. We start walking.

"What does that mean?"

"Well, first of all, you always use correct grammar when you instant message me."

"That's only because I'm a writer."

"Yes, I'm sure it is. Secondly, you fell off of a bunk bed last year and fractured your hip. If that doesn't scream old person, I don't know what does."

"So maybe crashing and burning is one of my daily activities. Still doesn't mean I'm an old person."

"You talk about your health problems at dinner."

"What? Do not!"

"Yes you do! Remember that one time we all had dinner at my house? You started talking to my grandparents about your root canal!"

"No I didn't!"

"Yes, you did. It was last fall. I remember perfectly!"

"I so did not talk about that-"

"You can't run for more than ten seconds without getting winded."

"Not true."

"Yes it is. Don't you remember PE last year? Coach Dyke made you run and after two minutes you passed out."

"I have a weak heart!"

"No you don't!"

"You don't know that!"

"Yes, I do!"

"Ugh."

"You get sick so easily."

"No I don't."

"This is like the tenth time you've gotten sick this season."

"That's because it's winter!"

"Yeah, and old people get sick in the winter! Plus, you got athlete's foot."

"In a locker room."

"But you told me you never take off your socks in there! How the hell is that even possible?!"

"That's a stupid reason-"

"Last but not least – I question your sanity. No old person is sane."

"What yes they can be."

"No they can't!"

"You know what, I'm allowed to be like that."

"Uh huh, and why?"

"Because I'm special!"

"No, you're just an old person!"

We both leave the building and go out into the little garden.

"Sometimes, Caitlyn, I really hate you."

"And sometimes, Nate, I really hate you too."

"But other times, I love you."

Caitlyn stops walking. "Can you repeat what you just said?"

I shake my head and keep walking.

"No, no. Nate. Did you really just say that you love me?"

"Well… yeah."

She stays silent and we keep walking.

Caitlyn then stops. "When I say 'I love you' it's a girly thing that doesn't mean much. But when you – or any other straight guy for that matter – says it, it's true."

I turn around. "What are you talking about?"

"Do you?"

"Do I what?"

"Do you love me?"

"… Yeah."

Caitlyn smiles. "Hey, Nate, I think you should look up."

I look up.

Mistletoe.

"How romantic," I say. "Just in time for the holiday season, eh?"

Caitlyn moves closer to me and wraps her arms around me. "I love you Nate. Not in the girly type, but in the throw rocks at your window, make you breakfast, pretend to like your taste in music type."

And then I have no clue how it happens, but we kiss.

Right under the mistletoe.