AN: My little lovelies I swear I have not forgotten about you. I have been having troubles with my laptop and have been unable to do a single thing. I feel terrible and I hope you will all forgive me after you read this chapter J
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, nor any of the characters within it.
Bella's POV
Going to the Cullen House was like going home. Well, to my second home in Forks anyway, and in a few weeks, I would be able to call it my home and everyone inside it, family. Unfortunately, before that could happen, Charlie and Carlisle had insisted that all of us take this little "camping trip" of premarital counseling. Really, it had been a sort of "come back" to Edward, Emmett, and Jasper locking up Carlisle in jail- but then Charlie began to think it was a really good idea.
"You will get to see the real idea about what its like to be with someone forever, Bells" he had told me. Of course, he didn't understand that I was taking "forever" for its literal meaning, but that- would definitely have to be a discussion for another day. All I could hope was that there wasn't a "pre-vampire counseling camping trip".
I was waiting for Edward to pick me up. He didn't spend the night like he usually did, because he wanted to keep an eye on Carlisle to make sure he didn't try to schedule any unneeded events, like the ones Charlie had shown us in the pamphlet. I shuddered as I thought back to the "Getting to Know your Future Husband Fishing Time".
"Are you about ready? Edward should be here any min-" His sentence was cut off by a knock on our front door. All of a sudden my heart started fluttering and I felt as anxious as the very first day he had picked me up for school. I prayed that after I was turned, that I would be able to stop doing things like that. I listened closely, with my ear pressed to the door, for any information I could hear.
"Hello Charlie, is Bella ready to go?" I heard a deep, smooth voice ask. Yummy.
"Morning Edward- she's still upstairs, is everyone ready for a weekend of pre-marital fun?" Charlie asked. I could tell by the tone of his voice that he was loving every moment of this.
"Oh you know them, Alice already has everything packed."
Charlie was laughing, then I heard the television flip on and the inaudible sound of what I thought could have been a basketball game. My door opened, which sent me sprawling towards the ground. When I looked up, I saw Edward with an apologetic grin on his face. "Good morning sunshine. You know, I thought you would have gotten past this whole fainting when you see me thing."
"I didn't know you were opening the door Edward. I was waiting to hear the footsteps, guess I forgot that my boyfriend flutters like a butterfly," I said standing up.
"Yes, and your fiancé also stings like a bee when he wants to. Still though, Bella, it isn't polite to listen in on other people's conversations," he whispered into my ear.
"Yes, because listening in on people's thoughts is much more polite," I shot back at him smiling. Since I had packed last night, I was ready to go. All I had to do was grab my overnight bag and we could be on our merry little way.
"You won't be needing that," Edward told me, as he pulled the small bag from my arms and set it back on my bed.
"Well, unless you want me running around naked- I will," I said, trying to pull it away from him.
"Of course I don't want you running around naked, Bella. We're going to be on a trip that is coordinated by Mr. and Mrs. Newton, which means there is a safe bet that little pug-nosed Mike will be there, and we can't have that little pervert ogling your goodies when I can't, now can we? Besides, Alice packed for you."
"Alice packed for me? My clothes were all here though, I checked- and what do you mean you can't? As far as I know its by your own choice that you don't… ogle at my goodies," I stammered, "if it were up to me, you would have… done that many times before now!"
"She bought everyone new clothes for the trip." He was changing the subject, the little worm. Well, I was definitely going to try and get him back on that topic at some point during the weekend. I finally let go of the bag, and he turned me towards the door.
"Alright kids, be careful and have fun- but not too much fun. Speaking of which… I need to talk to you-"
"Have to go Dad, love you, bye!" I said pulling Edward out the door and towards the silver Volvo parked in the driveway.
"You know, Bella, your dad was really going to try to talk to us about sex. Maybe you should go back in there and listen to him. I could always tell him how you try to jump at me every time I kiss you…" he threatened.
"You wouldn't, and I had enough of that last week with your parents, thank you very much."
The ride to his house was uneventful. He turned the radio on, I switched the station, he switched it back, so I turned it off. It was a vicious cycle. As we pulled into the Cullen's driveway, I saw a delivery truck pulling out. When I saw Edward shaking his head, I tried to prepare myself for the worst. Of course, when the Cullen's yard came into view, it was much better than that. Think "Bass Pro Shop" camping section. Right smack in the middle of the Cullen's front yard. Alice had lined up every tent, appliance, sleeping bag, jacket, quilt, and anything else you could think of in little isles, and she was walking down the second one with a shopping cart.
"Oh! Bella, I knew you would be here soon so I'm doing yours now! I've already shopped for everyone else," Alice said smiling brightly.
Near the cars I saw Rosalie and Emmett standing next to a load of luggage that would be enough to take a months trip. In the back, there were three tents already set up and ready to be used. What on earth was going on?
"Alice, what are you doing? I told you that you will only need your clothes and necessities. You will be sleeping in cabins. Cabins that already have beds built into them! There is a mess hall were you will pretend to eat, so you can put that fire stove away," Carlisle yelled from the second floor window.
Alice looked up at him, "These are necessities Carlisle. What if our cabin roof leaks? Or what if one collapses? Or what if Bella gets hungry and they refuse to feed her because it isn't time to eat yet? Are you going to deprive her of food and let her slowly starve?"
She looked over at me and winked. Carlisle however did not look as pleased. "Alice Cullen! None of those cabins better collapse, or I will take away your credit card privileges for an entire month, do you hear me? And only two suitcases per person. You are not going away for a month- and you do not need that dress I saw you stash away in there. You will be in the woods. With other humans. Humans do not go camping in Armani dresses!"
"Some humans do!" she argued.
"No they do not." Carlisle said before closing the window.
"Yes they do," she whispered, once again winking at me like I was part of the plan.
After about twenty minutes, Alice had finished her shopping for me, and drug me up to the bathroom, because apparently what I was wearing did not meet her standards for what a camper should look like. I thought I looked just fine, but of course- my "just fine" and Alice's "just fine" were two completely different things.
"Here put on these- oh! These too, they'll look great on you, trust me." It was like a whirlwind of clothes around me, and a lot of yanking and pulling on Alice's part to get my outfit off, and the one she had picked out for me on. As I stood to look at myself in the mirror, I couldn't help but laugh. I was wearing tan boots, that covered my new jeans up to my calves, a long sleeved flannel shirt, and a zip up jacket that matched the flannel shirt underneath. To top it all off, she put one of those rabbit fur lined hats on my head, and pinned the ear flaps up. I looked like a complete moron.
"Bella… what are you wearing?" Emmett asked when I stepped outside.
"I could ask you the same thing… what are you going for the cover of Outdoorsman magazine?" I laughed. Emmett was decked out. He reminded me of a mix between a logger and a hunter all rolled into one, with an axe to complete the ensemble. Apparently Alice had given everyone new 'camping outfits' to wear, because the rest of the family looked just as foolish as I did. All except Rosalie, who somehow managed to make her outfit look like it came right off of the red carpet.
"Let's go!" Jasper moaned, after putting away all of their luggage into his new car. I noticed that Rosalie and Emmett had opted out driving their new car, and were loading up Emmett's jeep.
"Oh- wait!" Alice said, her eyes opening wide. She was having a vision, I could tell, then she ran towards the house like a bat out of hell. She came back with an extra suitcase, that was padlocked shut. My eyes darted around, but everyone else looked just as confused as I did. Only Edward seemed entertained by her actions.
Mr. Newton's POV
"Is everything ready?" I asked my wife. I was still very nervous about the premarital counseling camp. It was our first time leading it, and we only got the job because the last couple who was doing it divorced. Not really the type of people who you would want teaching other people how to be married.
"Yes, Greg, Mike is just finishing up the male cabins now." My wife Julie said, coming around the corner with a plate full of rice crispy bars. She was really into this sort of thing, and I wondered whether or not it was because she would be able to find out who was getting married in town before anyone else knew. I loved my wife dearly, but the woman definitely loved her gossip.
"You know, I'm not sure about splitting the couples up. They're about to be married, don't you think that most of them have… you know, consummated the relationship before? Kate and Rich let them sleep together if they wanted," I said filling a glass full of water and placing it on the podium. I would need it later.
"Gregory! That is the precise reason that they are divorced!"
"By letting other couples sleep together?" I must have not heard her correctly. Either that, or I had missed something in the crash course of love.
"No-" she said, sounding agitated that I didn't understand. "Because they did not cherish the sacredness of marriage. I can not believe that you think all of these kids have slept together. I mean, look at our little Mike. Already graduated, and the little angel doesn't even have the slightest notion of sex."
I was stunned. Was my wife blind? She must have not been in "our little angel's" bedroom lately. Even I knew he had Playboys stuffed between his mattresses and condoms stashed in his drawer. I don't know if he's ever used them, God bless the girl if he had, but if he wasn't even thinking about sex, than I needed to teach my boy a thing or two about what he used as play toys.
"Right, of course, what was I thinking? Of course Mike has never thought about sex, even the mention of the word 'nipple' makes him blush…" I added sarcastically.
"Nipple?" I looked up and saw my son walk into the room.
Julie walked over to our son and placed her hands on his shoulders. "Now Mike, I want you to answer me honestly. Have you ever been… intimate with a girl? You can tell me dear, its all very natural, I promise. Mommy just wants to know so that she can make sure her little boy knows all about protection."
I thought Mike was going to die. Lord knows if my mother had ever tried that on me I would have lied like a dog to get out of the situation.
"No, I-I mean, of course not. I'm…. saving myself until marriage just like you, Mom," Mike stammered
"Good, and I want you to tell me if any of those little girls in town try to pressure you into anything you don't want to do okay?"
"Yeah- sure." Then Mike was gone. I'm sure he was texting all of his little friends to make fun of his mother.
"Hello?" I heard from the doorway. Our first couple had just shown up.
About a half an hour later, the little lodging area had about seven couples sitting in the room. All wearing name tags, and looking not so eager to start the day off. I recognized Bella, who had worked for us for awhile, until she quit about a week ago, for some reason, sitting near the center. I gave her a little wave, which caused her to go about fifty shades of crimson.
"Alright, well, let's get started. My name is Greg Newton, and this is my wife Julie. We will be your councilors and leaders this weekend. I hope that you will all walk away from this camp understanding a little more about marriage and your partner. Since this is our first year, I hope that you can come to us with any ideas or suggestions that will help everything run more smoothly. Now, today all we are going to be doing is getting settled in. Men, your cabin's will be located towards the north end of the park area, ladies, yours is to the south. Each cabin will hold three people, so pick someone from your gender that you can get along with."
I saw eyes darting around the room looking for someone that they might know. The only ones who looked completely content were the Cullens, Hales, and Bella. Apparently they would be staying together, which really didn't surprise me. For the last few weeks, if you saw any one of them, the other five were trailing not to far away.
"And also, I will be taking each couple into my office and talking with you about your decisions to get married, any problems that you might have, and how we can work together to fix them. The first couple will be… Emmett and Rosalie? Then we will have a Jasper and Alice, then Bella and Edward… each session will take about an hour, so please be on time and waiting if you are next. There is a list over there on the table that will list off the rest of the times. Emmett and Rosalie? Will you meet me in my office? Thank you."
I saw Emmett rubbing his hands together and Rosalie looking irritated. This was definitely going to be interesting.
AN2: Thanks again for being so understanding you guys, I'm hoping to have Emmett and Rosalie's counseling session up tomorrow sometime, but it depends on how feisty Emmett is being. I have a poll up, that I hope each of you will vote in. It would be extremely helpful.