Disclaimer: The X-Files belong to Chris Carter and Fox, Californication belongs to Tom Kapinos and Showtime. David Duchovny is just the common factor, and more importantly, the inspiration!
A/N: I'm so sorry I haven't updated this until now. I do have an actual plot now, though so that is good. I really enjoyed season 2 of Cali and was glad that they renewed it for a third season. I hope you enjoy the update as I've introduced more of the Cali characters.
Ch. 5: Here Comes Trouble
Scully awoke to the sound of birds chirping outside and Mulder's faint snoring. She turned to look over at her partner, and absent-mindedly brushed his bangs away from his eyes. Still, he didn't stir. No matter, she would let him sleep. God knows he needed it. Honestly, Mulder got sick more than anyone she'd ever known. But, although she'd rather die than let anyone know it, she loved taking care of him. Mulder never let her baby him unless he was sick, so Scully actually treasured those times that she could go the extra mile for him. There was also the fact that he made an adorable patient…
Tearing her eyes away from the sleeping Mulder, Scully rose from the bed. After going through her usual morning routine, she slipped outside the guestroom, silently closing the door behind her. She tiptoed down the hall to the kitchen, finding it empty. Huh. She supposed Hank was still asleep, something she wouldn't find out of character for him. Hank did seem the type to stay up until the last possible moment and sleep in until the afternoon. That was fine with her. The less she had to see of Mulder's cousin, the better. He was definitely charming, but, like Mulder, he knew exactly how to push her buttons. Still, Scully was extremely grateful to Hank for letting them stay here. It was the first time during their short life as fugitives that she felt relatively safe. With that positive thought in mind, she decided to make breakfast for her and Mulder. And if Hank decided to wander in, she wouldn't mind sharing with him.
Scully rummaged through the fridge, deciding to make do with Hank's limited selection. She took out one of the egg cartons, making sure to check the expiration date. Then she brought out some shredded cheddar cheese, along with the bacon bits and a tomato. Mulder never could resist eating one of her omelets, so hopefully she could tempt him to eat at least a few bites. Scully went to work, beating the eggs until fluffy and then pouring them into a skillet, adding the toppings when called for.
"Is that for me?" Scully spun around to find bed head Hank standing before her dressed in naught but his pajama bottoms.
"Good morning to you, too," she replied, trying extra hard not to stare at Hank's well muscled chest. "It's for Mulder and I, but you can have some if you like."
"Oh good," grinned Hank as he took a seat at the kitchen counter. "I miss having someone cook for me."
"Don't get used to it," Scully warned. "Omelets are my specialty – I hardly know how to make anything else." The words had barely left her mouth when Scully heard a new voice coming from down the hall. And from the sound of it, the person was decidedly female.
"Don't look at me," Hank said defensively when Scully gave him an exasperated look. "I slept alone last night."
"Fine," said Scully. "Were you expecting anyone this morning?" Hank shook his head, bewildered as they headed towards the sound of the woman's shrill voice. Scully's omelet sat forgotten on the skillet.
Meanwhile, in the guestroom
"Hankie! Good morning," the voice cooed. "I want you." Mulder slowly opened his eyes to find a young brunette dressed in a school uniform staring down at him. Her long hair draped over his eyes, making it difficult to see. It was as if one of his old porn videos had come to life, with the leggy brunette's sultry tones telling him she wanted him. But suddenly a red flag alert registered in his brain. The brunette had called him Hank. Worse than that, the brunette wasn't Scully. Oh God, what if he'd cheated on her? Mulder didn't honestly think he would do that, but to be honest, his brain felt a little fuzzy at the moment.
"Ah!" Mulder screamed, but since he was hoarse he barely made a sound of protest. "Ib not Hank!"
"Sure you are," the girl said, nibbling on his ear. "Didn't you miss me, Hankie?" Mulder recoiled in fear. It seemed this girl was going to have her way with him, whether or not he was a willing participant.
"Leave be alode," Mulder whimpered, wondering where the hell Scully was and why his cousin was involved with a girl this young! "Scully!" He tried to scoot away from the girl, to no avail.
"Aw, Hankie is sick," the girl tutted, finally having realized Mulder's cold. She then climbed on top of him. "I can fix that," she said, giving Mulder a seductive smile as her hands wandered south.
"Please don't," Mulder moaned. He tried to push her off of him, but the girl had an iron grip on him with her legs. She wouldn't budge an inch. If only he had some of his strength back, he would show her! "Ib not Hank. By nabe is Fox Bulder and Ib in love wid someond else. If she catches you wid me, she will ged the wrong idea! Please stop." Mulder gave her the puppy-dog look that always seemed to work on Scully, but somehow (what a shocker) it just served to turn the girl on more.
That was how Scully and Hank found them when they burst into the bedroom. The girl was straddling a very terrified Mulder, whose eyes grew large with guilt the moment he saw his partner.
"Scully, it's not whad it looks like," Mulder pleaded, thankful that she knew he didn't have the strength to fight off this unwelcome intruder.
"I know, Mulder," Scully reassured him that she wasn't blaming him in the slightest for this odd predicament. "Get your hands off my partner," Scully growled at the young woman, wishing she had her gun on her. Who did this woman think she was? The girl did a double take at the real Hank, and then quickly moved off Mulder, swearing under her breath.
"Sorry, lady," said the girl. "I didn't realize that Hankie here had an identical twin."
"Shit," Hank mumbled as he realized what must've happened. He was starting to hate this physical resemblance between himself and Fox. "Mia, what the fuck are you doing here?"
"I just wanted to see what you were… up to," said Mia with a smirk. "Lucky me, I got to meet Fox here. He's a lot nicer than you, Hankie."
"You doe this girl?" Mulder said angrily, glaring at his cousin.
"We've met," Hank said with a grimace. Just then Scully put two and two together.
"Hank, don't tell me this is her?" Hank winced.
"This is just unbelievable," Scully grumbled.
"Does she look like she's sixteen?" Hank asked Scully, who reluctantly shook her head.
"What's going ond?" Mulder asked, bewildered. He hadn't been privy to Hank and Scully's discussion the night before about Hank's deepest and darkest sin.
"We fucked once," Mia offered smugly. Hank just hung his head in response.
"But… but…" Mulder stammered, wincing at the coarse language coming from the sixteen year-old hussy. "Aren't you a little young for hib?"
"I think we've already established that fact," said Hank through gritted teeth. "I didn't know she was sixteen at the time, alright?" Then Hank turned to Mia. "Next time you want to come over, to see Becca or whatever, you call me first. You got that?"
"Fine, Hankie, whatever you want," Mia agreed. "I'll just say goodbye, for now." Scully didn't appreciate the subtle smirk that laced Mia's attractive features. There was something about this girl that she didn't trust, and it wasn't just because of her indiscretion with Hank, either.
"Goodbye, Mia," Hank said pointedly. He didn't miss the lingering gaze she gave him and then his cousin before she sauntered out of the room. Scully heaved a sigh of relief as they heard the front door click shut.
"Well, I believe we've had our fill of excitement for the morning," Scully commented dryly. But alas, that wasn't going to be the case. Just as the threesome headed towards the kitchen to salvage Scully's omelet, someone unlocked the front door from the outside.
"Hank!" This time the unknown female's voice sounded more mature to Scully, who estimated the woman to be around their age. Hank's eyes grew wide as he recognized the pain in the woman's voice.
"Karen, what's wrong?" He asked, hurrying over to her. "Is it Becca?" Karen nodded, barely able to speak as Hank pulled her into what he hoped was a comforting embrace.
"Oh God, she's missing! Hank, I can't find her anywhere. I called all of her friends and they haven't seen her either." Mulder and Scully witnessed this scene, trying their best to follow it. Scully knew that Mulder was having flashbacks of his sister's abduction, and grabbed his hand in support. This always happened whenever a young girl went missing.
"Have you called the police?" Karen nodded.
"Of course I did. They can't do anything unless she's been missing for twenty-four hours."
"That's bullshit," Hank growled, grabbing his car keys that were resting on the kitchen counter. "Let's go, Karen."
"I'll help you," Scully added, directing her statement at Karen. "Ma'm, you're in luck. My partner and I happen to be former FBI agents. Mulder is the best profiler the Bureau has ever seen. He can help you find your daughter."
"Thank you," Karen said quietly, giving the pair a grateful nod of acknowledgement.
"Alright, everyone in my car," said Hank, who was already heading for the door.
"Hank, wait!" Mulder called. "You dod't have andy leads. Do you?"
"No," said Karen with regret. "If I had any idea who would do this to her, I would've mentioned it. All I know is that I tucked her into bed last night and she was gone when I went to wake her this morning."
"She could've snuck out. We have to go look for her!" Hank cried.
"And where do you propose we start?" Mulder asked. "We deed to get the facts straight first."
Just then Hank's cell rang.
"It's Runkle," Hank informed Karen his best friend and book agent was on the other end. "I'll try and get him and Marce to help with the search." Hank stepped away to take his call while Mulder and Scully asked Karen about anyone who might have something against Becca, or even her or Hank.
"Hank, I'm having the worst day ever," Charlie Runkle vented.
"Charlie…" Hank cut in.
"Listen to me, man!" Charlie cried. "My secretary didn't show up for work today. I'm afraid she's going to tell my boss that we were messing around."
"Charlie…"
" I wish I'd never gotten involved with her, man," Hank's friend rambled. "After the shit she and Mia pulled stealing your new book-"
"CHARLIE!" Hank shouted. "I don't care about that shit. Becca is missing! Will you help us find her?"
"Of course, man. You should've said something earlier," Charlie said. "I just gotta tell my boss and then Marce and I can meet up with you and Karen."
"Thank you," Hank said gratefully. "I'll call you as soon as I know where we're going." Click. "Charlie and Marce are going to help us," he announced, walking back over to a distraught Karen and the two ex-agents.
"Thank God. Hank, I'm going to take Mulder and Scully over to the house," said Karen. "Mulder says that he might be able to find a clue as to who did this if he examines her room."
"Are you sure that's the best thing to do?" Hank wondered.
"We dod't have any leads," Mulder reminded him. "I deed somethig to go on before we go runding around town. I can solve this, Hank – I doe I can, especially wid Scully's help."
"Fine," Hank reluctantly agreed.
"Mulder, are you sure you're feeling up to this?" Scully asked, even though she knew what his answer would be.
"Scully, I dod't have a choice – this girl's life is at stake," Mulder reminded her. "And I am feeling a little better thad yesterday."
"Alright. Let's do this," said Scully, embracing his sense of determination. She and Mulder followed Hank and Karen into Karen's Toyota Corolla and got inside. As Hank peeled out of the drive, Scully prayed that Becca would be alright, not only for her sake, but for Mulder's.
End Ch. 5
A/N: I will update sooner than last time, I promise!!