A.N This is actually a re-do of chapter 5, I believe. It just didnt feel right, the first time. And I knew i was behind on updating the story. I'm so sorry. I just hope, this one is actually better than the one before.

Disclaimer: CCS, I have heard of no such thing.

The Burden of Bullying

Sakura's POV

After the day, Eriol walked with me home, we became friends. Friends in secret.

Secret as in no-one knows of our relationship, even though we are just friends.

Why? Because being an outcast, isn't all that fun. Yes, those who materialistic won't approach you but either would anybody. And I now know Eriol is one of the most popular guys at this school. I don't want to drag him down with me. They say misery deserves company. I don't think so, especially if you can avoid it. And even more if the misery belongs to me.

At school, so far everybody ignores me. It's rather peaceful. I don't have any worries. It's actually quite strange; the people here have no problems hurting other people. I always thought that bullying only happened on T.V and that everyone knew that it was wrong to bully others. But the people here had no problems with it. It was like a second nature.

But the major difference in my life right now compared to my life a couple of months ago, wouldn't be me. I haven't changed, maybe on the outside but definitely not on the inside; I still have my morals and beliefs. I think the only difference was that I had a family and many good friends.

But then again, I do have a family; Okaa-san and Tomoyo-san. And ever since last Friday, I consider Eriol to be my friend. I guess, there are second chances in life, even to start over again.

I really do respect Eriol, it was him who approached me. Me being classified as "inferior" yet he approached me. I admire him about that. He has a mind of his own.

And although we are friends in secret, I don't mind.

When we see each other in the hall way or we just happen to catch the other's eye, a smile is our greeting. But it is hard on his behalf seeing that I do, wear those overly thick glasses. But I enjoy those times, when we greet each other.

He acknowledges my existence.

And then, there's always after school. And it just so happens we're the last ones to leave all of the time. I was glad.

I didn't want other people to see us, together. For mine and his benefit.

I preferred it that way. He preferred it that way. But he never said why, it was a good thing. Because if he did, I'd probably would have to explain myself.

Yes, I can tell him that me being the great nice person I am, didn't want to ruin his reputation. But it isn't exactly true.

Truth being I can't possibly tell anyone that I'm dressing as a "nerd" because I lost my meaning to live. Or that, I'm an imposter.

Eriol is actually quite the image of a gentlemen. I sometimes wonder why I haven't noticed him until he actually introduced himself. Worst bit being we were in the same class.

He's actually quite the idol at school. People just seem to adore him and personally I couldn't blame them. You have to be in denial to say that he isn't handsome, smart, athletic etc.

How could I not notice him?

But then again, I didn't notice anything around me. I guess, I' the type of person who only thinks inside the circle.

But Eriol doesn't seem to mind, at least he doesn't show it. But once again, he's quite the gentlemen. Waiting for me after school, walking home with me, acknowledging my existence; he was a good person.

But I'm also scared, if we were to be caught, together. What would he do? Would he deny knowing me? Would he push me away?

I know I shouldn't assume such things from Eriol. Especially when all this time, he'd been so nice to me.

But none the less I'm scared, maybe he'll be like the rest.

If that were to be the case; that would be the worst. I'd rather not have met him at all.

…………………………………………………………………..

Monday, the day that everybody hates. The day students have to go back to school and the day where workers have to back to work. But, I like Mondays, it was a start of a new week.

But today was rather out of the ordinary. Well, all the way up to period 4.

I was the first one in class like usual. I didn't mind, I took it as a head start. Then soon students started to file in and take their seats. The teacher had happened to be late, so the students took it as an opportunity to chit-chat.

I took it as an opportunity to day dream, about my "old" friends. When all of a sudden, I felt someone bumped into my table and heard my possessions fell.

"Ohh, I'm so sorry but I'm in quite the rush." I looked up at the person, it was Chiharu.

"Don't worry about it." I quickly went to return all my scattered stationary and books. As Chiharu returned to her seat.

The next minute the teacher came in, I made it just in time.

But it didn't end there. Strange enough, it continued. Difference being, the person didn't apologize like Chiharu did and the class would laugh or snicker.

But maybe it was all an accident.

I was the only one sitting in the front seat, most students sat at the back. Maybe that explains why it only happens to me.

By the end of the school day as I walked with Eriol. I found myself wondering if I was being bullied. Again.

"Sakura, you okay?" I turned to look at Eriol. He seemed concern.

Should I tell him? He is my friend and a third person point of view would be good. They always get the best view of the situation. But I can't depend on Eriol, he probably has his own matters to take care of.

"Hello? Earth to Sakura, Earth to Sakura. Come in. Come in." Eriol then started to wave his hand in front of my face trying to get my attention.

I giggled.

"Sorry. I was just thinking. And yeah, I'm alright." But I was always told I'm a bad liar.

"Liar. Who are you trying to fool?" Eriol continued.

Plan B, tell a truth, but not the truth.

"Well, you see. I'm trying to find a part-time job ASAP. But I'll be lucky if they even reply." So, I can't lie but that doesn't mean I have to tell the truth, well at least not the whole truth.

"Oh, is that it? No-problem. Knight in shining amour is here!" Eriol said with a goofy grin on his face. I found myself smiling along with him.

"Oh, and what is the knight in shining amour going to do?"

"You know there's a local supermarket nearby, right?"

I nodded. It was very well known.

"Well, if you want I can get you a job there." He was grinning.

"Are you serious? Really? I'll be forever grateful!" It really was too good to be true.

"Yup. It'll be no problem. When do you want to work?"

"I was thinking on Friday nights or the weekend. But I really don't mind."

"Well, be prepared to work this weekend then." Eriol once again beamed that terrific smile of his.

"Thanks, Eriol." He had made me forget about all my worries.

Missed that feeling. The feeling that friends give which washes all your worries away.

…………………………………………………………..

Tuesday, déjà vu. It was happening again. My stuff was repetitively knocked onto the ground. Quite embarrassing really. Especially on two occasions.

One, I was working quietly, the class was quiet for once; strange as it may be. When all of a sudden CRASH my stuff was on the floor, again.

But the difference being, my reaction.

"Where's the war?" I even stood abruptly, totally horrified. The class snickered were louder this time compared to other times. I was mortified, so embarrassing. But life goes on.

Two, my hands were in my pencil case, which was on top of my books, which was located on the top-right corner of my desk. And it just so happened, my table was once again bumped into. Difference being this time, my stuff wasn't the only thing that landed on the ground. Try including me. Was it even possible?!

But, I guess so. Since it did happen. Once again the class laughed. And I looked at the person who bumped into my desk. She explained the cause. Well, she was rather…big? Or maybe it was just my desk.

But now that I think about it, it was rather hiliarious.

Then came my walk home with Eriol.

"Hey, you got the job." Eriol, the deliverer of good news does his job well.

"Bow down, to Eriol the deliverer of good news." I found myself joking and pretending to bow down and worship the floor he was walking on.

"Yes, I am great. Aren't I?" I gave him the weird look.

"Yes, like your ego." We both laughed at that.

"Well, you start on this Saturday 2pm to 6pm. The pay is 10 per hour. You work at the checkout. Job's pretty simple, greet customers, scanned their goods, place them into bags, state the amount, receive the amount, give any apparent change, thank the customers and bid them farewell. Even, someone like "you" can handle that right?"

I know he was joking. But what happens if I do stuff up? Eriol did get me this job, I can't possibly stuff up. Well, I can but I don't want to.

"I was kidding." Eriol then said, as he didn't hear a reply from me.

"Eriol, what happens if I can't handle it?"

Eriol then gave me "the" look. I think it was the "are-you-retarded-look". I sighed.

"I'm the type of person, who can't even do the simplest thing right. Like, you'll guide me through step-to-step and somehow I'll manage to stuff up. No problem."

Eriol then laughed.

"I'm not kidding! It's like you give me a fine plight of stairs and I'll find a way to fall down from them! I'm disaster, itself."

Eriol continued to laugh. Was it really that funny? My misery??

"Eriol, you did find me this job. I promise to give it my all. But, I'm scared, if I were to make a mistake. I don't want you to take on any effects."

Surprisingly, he stopped.

"Oh, don't worry about that."

Was he just saying that?

"Because I don't expect anything from you." Eriol continued.

What? I think my expression gave my thought away.

"Let me explain. I don't have an expectation of you. Therefore, if your results were to be "bad", I wouldn't be disappointed. But if your results were to be good, I'll be proud. Okay?"

Wow.

Once, again. He made me forget about all my worries.

He was like a brother that I never had.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Syaoran's POV

It was pretty low, what the class did to her. The majority of my class is considered as adults, 18 years or over. But for them to pick on Sakura was like primary school, where they didn't know any better. But Sakura was at fault too, she was too innocent, naïve and nice for her own good.

It all began at the start of this week. The bullying. At first, I thought it might had been because of me.

Did someone see us walking together on the way home?

But as it continued on, on Tuesday. I soon found out that wasn't it. Why? Because Meiling, Tomoyo or Chiharu hadn't consulted me about it. So, I guess, I wasn't the cause of it. But I was still concerned, she might get hurt.

But this is her battle, she should handle it on her own.

……………….Flash Back………………………….

It was the third day of Sakura being bullied. How did I know? Her stuff was repetitively shoved onto the floor,student after student. But she didn't do anything, all she did was pick them back up.

In a way, I was disappointed, where's her back bone? I've been waiting for two whole days for her to fight-back. I believed in her.

"Eriol, is something brothering you?" a feminine voice, asked.

Eriol? I thought he was on vacation. Oh, hold a sec, that's me. I still wasn't use to her calling me Eriol and the rest of the student body calling me Li or Syaoran.

"Well, yeah. But it really isn't my business." I said, as we continued our way home.

I wanted to bring it up. I wanted HER to bring it up. It is her business. She's the one being bullied, not me. I've given her two days, I'll understand if you don't know you're being bullied. But this was too obvious.

I remember when Meiling or Tomoyo have their random grudges on other females, they'll tell me about it, ALL the time. But in reality, I really couldn't care less. Why, because I was a MALE!

We males do things quite different than females. When the other gets us pissed, we sock the other, we attack. Whilst the females from what I learnt from Meiling and Tomoyo, they scheme.

Quite scary, if you ask me.

I personally, prefer the males' method. Nice and straight forward.

Sakura is a female, maybe right at that moment she's scheming up an evil scheme. Like they say, it's the quite ones you have to watch out for. Sakura is definitely a quite one.

I waited a while. Tomoyo and Meiling were always eager to tell me their "gossip", if not the "gossip", or if not made-up "gossip" aka bullshit. Why wasn't she?

I looked at her and I was puzzled.

She was admiring the nature, with her laidback body posture, she taking in big breaths of fresh air, a big goofy smile on her lips, a little skip in her walk, an expression of "akunamatata" on her face. (an. means no worries. (Disney's Lion King) is that how you spell it?)

Hold a sec….

"Do you even know you're being bullied?!"

Whoops, that came out loud, didn't it?

She stopped, I then stopped. That answered my question. Yes. Yes, I'm an idiot.

"Huh?" She titled her head to the right. The confused look.

"You're kidding me. Your stuff has been shoved onto the floor for 67 times already, including the time when Chiharu "accidentally" bumped into it and apologized. And you don't think, you're being bullied?" I even did the talking-marks hand gesture for the word "accidentally".

"Eriol, well no. Since they were accidents."

"Accidents! All 67 of them?" I had one of my eye brows raised.

"Well, I do sit at the front. It explains why everyone chose to sit near the back."

What the…?

"I just wished, I knew. Then maybe, then I'll sit near the back." she continued to ramble on.

What the…?

"But, it's okay I guess. I like the front seat. I'm always the first one out of the class and I don't get disturbed so easily." She smiled.

That's it….

"67 times. You think they were ALL accidents. You think it's because you sit in the front?" I'm not sure if it was me, but to me, she's in denial.

Silence, then came between us. It wasn't the first time, but this is the first awkward silence we had experienced.

She then smiled, a weak smile, a fake smile.

"It doesn't matter. It isn't like there's fragile stuff in my pencil case. I don't use coloring pencils or lead pencils etc. I only use pens, so they don't get wrecked, no matter how many times you drop them on the ground." She laughed/joked.

That wasn't funny. Is she ignoring me? I was pissed, and no, I'm not going to "sock" her. I never really did like it when I'm ignored. Especially when I'm trying to help.

I quickened my pace, I wanted to get away.

"Gomen." I heard her familiar voice, voice out. I had barely taken a step, as a tug was felt on my school sleeve.

"I just don't want to assume or accuse." she had whispered, but I heard her; loud and clear. I nodded at her apology, she had removed her hand off of my sleeve.

That was too easy, why was I even mad?

We both stood there rooted onto the pavement, I guess she was waiting to see, if I'll continue to leave her alone with my quickened pace.

"I'm sorry. I was out of line. It wasn't any of my business. I was just…" I'm not too sure of what I was about to say, I wanted to say curious, I'm always curious.

I then heard a melody, her melody.

"Concern, right? I mean, you even countered the number of times my stuff fell." She continued with her melody, trying to lighten up the mood. It worked, well sorta.

I felt the temperature on my face rise, I wasn't that concerned. I mean curious.

We continued on our way.

"Concerned? Puh-please. Do you know how annoying it is, when you're trying to work and it just so happens that "someone's" stuff keeps falling to the ground?" Once again, I emphasized the "someone". Nice save.

She blushed. "I'll try to do something about that."

……………..End of Flahback……………………….

She really was too nice. When she said, she'll try to do something about it. I thought she was going to fight back somehow. But I was wrong.

She just measly placed her belongings onto her lap. I guess, it worked. The girls had no way to "accidentally" shove her stuff onto the floor.

But it only worked for a day.

………………………………………………………………………….

Sakura's POV

Friday, the day many students enjoyed and waited for. Apparently it goes by the quickest. I would disagree, especially with today as an example.

From the start I had expected nothing. I didn't want anything, hence nothing. But nothing is ever easy.

I think I can now say, that at the beginning of this week I was being bullied. I wasn't sure then but now I'm sure. I wished I knew back then, maybe then those little things would continue. I guess, me putting my possessions onto my lap was interpreted as a sign of me rebelling. I wouldn't have "rebelled" knowing that they'll pull something off like they did today.

They had taken a "joke", a bit far.

It made me realize, that what they did was horrible, it made the previous incidents seem like nothing, even if you add them all up.

I never experienced something like this. Never.

……………….Flash Back………………………………………………………….

It was the last period of the day as Sakura worked on quietly on her work with her possessions on her lap.

The teacher had finished explaining the class work for today, and allowed the remaining 20 minutes of the class for them to start the work. And if there were any questions, that was the time to ask them.

Sakura was then disturbed from her work, as she heard snickers from the class. But she was use to it, so at the best of her ability she ignored them, once again. But this time it was different, the class was quiet, only a few snickered from time to time. Sakura felt their eyes on her. At first she thought she was paranoid.

So she forced herself to believe that, the class was actually working on the set work because the work wasn't easy at all. She herself wanted to go up to the teacher and request for assistance but she was too embarrassed. No-one has gone up to ask for assistance, so she felt stupid and even more if she went up to her and ask for assistance. So, her plan was to ask after school as everyone else would start to head home. Hopefully, the teacher wouldn't mind. Or Eriol.

Her plan was foiled.

It was after skipping in total 5 questions that Sakura felt a tap of her shoulder. She was scared. But all that was masked due to the glasses, covering the surprise in her eyes and the male lifting his hand off of her shoulder as soon as it touched her. As if she was burning, if not something despicable. But at least, he didn't feel her jolt.

None the less, Sakura remained poised to the audience.

"Hello, can I help you?" She was hoping, the male didn't require assistance with the set work. She herself was having problems, and she was supposed to be the "nerd". But, you have to be careful of what you wish for.

"Actually, you can." Replied the male, with quite a smug smirk on his face.

Sakura then crossed her fingers, still hoping it wasn't about the set work. Her prayer was answered, unfortunately as she found out. She was surprised, as the male started to bend down on one knee.

"What are you doing?" Sakura had managed to squeak out. He couldn't possibly be…

"I think it's quite obvious, I'm proposing." He then looked at Sakura right in the eyes.

Sakura was then scared, can he see me? She then looked down, not down at him but looked down onto her possessions. As she thought he couldn't possibly see her, not with these glasses, right?

"Awww, how cute. You're shy. Why, look at how red your face is." The male said in a mocking voice.

Sakura felt her shoulders drop and her herself trying to hold herself together.

Please, don't do this.

"So, Sakura Kinomoto. Isn't your dream to marry a guy like me?" The male continued.

It wasn't even a proposal.

It was then that Sakura found her mind and voice. She needed to focus. She knew she wasn't at her old "home" where everyone was there to protect her. She needed to decided on a course of action. She was going to make a stand. So as she licked her lips and took a breath, she decided on saying that this wasn't funny

"This isn't…"

"Arai, this isn't funny." A third party had said.

A sigh of relief was released from Sakura. She was saved but it was let out too soon. She should have seen who the third party was.

(an. Did you guys think it was Syaoran?)

It was Tomoyo Dadouji. But then again, it was Sakura. She would have released that breath of relief, even knowing it was Tomoyo. Why? Because Tomoyo was her friend. And like always, Sakura has many things to learn.

"You're trampling on her dream." Tomoyo had continued.

The class had snickered at that. Sakura felt herself curling up on her seat. She wanted to go, anywhere but here. She clinched her eyes closed, believing by doing so. No one can get to her.

Touya, dad, please help me.

"I guess, you're right, Dadouji. Seeing that my family would never accept a bride, who's parentless. And more what family-less." He then snickered.

Which then the whole class continued.

That was it.

Sakura could no longer hold it. I give up.

"I'm sorry, I have to go." Sakura had stood up all too sudden which then allowed her possessions to fall abruptly. But the male didn't move.

"Could you please move?" Sakura asked.

They were standing quite close. There was no other way for Sakura to make an escape, with her seat being one of the ones besides the wall.

"I can move, I just choose not to." Was his reply.

Sakura could feel the smirk inking in his voice. She clinched her eyes closed once again, not wanting to cry. As an image of Touya appeared before her.

She found herself smiling, as she pictured him. Touya…….onnichan…...

"Kaijuu" Touya had whispered, as he waved.

She smiled at the memory, or her brother.

Sakura then just so happened to open her eyes, as she continued to smile. And with her head looking down, her first view was of the male's feet.

And before she could even stop herself, she had stomped on the males left foot. Force of habit.

"OWWW! MOTHER "BEEP"-ER"

The male had sworn as he started to hop with his hands on his left foot.

"What are you, an elephant?" he cried as he tried to cover up his pain.

Sakura then saw her chance to escape but not before taking a glance at the male. She felt a sweat drop (anime style) on her head. It couldn't had hurt that much. Seeing that, that was Touya's and her daily routine.

She smiled at the memory.

Oh, wait, my escape.

She took a step forward and spared the male another glance. He was still jumping up and down.

Sakura, feeling a bit of guilt, faced him and made a small bow.

"I'm sorry, it was a reflex."

She continued towards the door but made a stop at the teacher's desk.

"Shitsureshimashita." Sakura said and bowed. (It's a Japanese saying, when one exits the room)

Surprisingly, Sakura received a nod from the teacher. She then she exited the room, relieved.

……………End of Flashback………………………………

I didn't return to class after that. Instead I headed straight home, by myself. I didn't want to face them again. Not even Eriol.

But after, what had happened today, during school. I'm scared, Eriol might avoid me.

It's selfish, I know. The whole class dislikes me, well maybe except Eriol but that might be my wishful thinking. And I want him to be by my side.

Syaoran's POV

It was on a Friday, that the class pulled out the big guns. They had openly insulted her. Well, Arai Zuki did but he isn't smart enough to pull something like that off. He had someone behind him to pull the strings, someone being a female. My assumption, Tomoyo Dadouji.

I do consider her as a friend, seeing that we've met each other in primary school and her being Meiling's best friend. Oh, and also my best friend Eriol has quite the crush on her. But ever since I knew her I always knew there was something "off" about her. I never could pinpoint it, because she was always proud about her personality. So she had nothing to hide, I guess.

But why would Tomoyo have a grudge against Sakura?

But it isn't my business. Hence, I don't plan on interfering.

At first, I think I should have. To be honest, Tomoyo took my line! The "Arai, that's not funny" line. But when I realized Tomoyo was actually mocking Sakura. I wanted to give Sakura a chance. I know she has it in her, not to rebel but to twist things. I believed in her, I still do.

In the end, I think Sakura had handled it quite well. Especially the bit where Sakura had stomped on Arai's feet, saying that it was reflex? Quite cute, but she won't be hearing that from me.

Too bad, she left right after that class. I always looked forward to the end of the day. Where we'll walk together.

Because she was real. We don't talk about "gossip", instead we talk about whatever is on our heads. And surprisingly, I never once found it boring. And she never intrudes or asks about anything that might be taboo. I guess, she knows what to say.

She doesn't talk much about herself, that's what makes her different to other girls, who talks about themselves 24/7. But I sometimes wish she would, especially about her family. I've heard rumours, focusing on how she has no family. But if that was the case, why does she seem so determined and strong? If it was me, I don't know what I'll do.

I only got to where I am because of my family.

Well, we're always the last ones to leave, because purposely I pretend to take a long time at my locker. I didn't want people to see us together.

Because the possibility of her finding out that I'm actually Syaoran Li, increases. I'm actually surprised she hasn't found out. I'm quite popular at school. But I guess she just doesn't pay attention to that kind of stuff. And also, if my "fanclub" was to know, she'll definitely have a hard time.

But in the end, I still feel bad. Would Sakura hate me, for not helping her out today?

It's 10pm right now. I have Sakura's stuff right in front of me. She had left them, after the incident. The teacher insisted she'd keep them and give it to her first thing on Monday. But I told her, I'll be meeting her tomorrow.

It was true, I found her a job and she starts tomorrow. 2pm-6pm. I wanted to pick her up, after her shift. The place she works at, the local supermarket is actually quite close to our house. And me, returning her stuff to her is the perfect excuse to see her tomorrow. Well, not excuse, I don't need an excuse; it's a reason. Yes, a reason.

Problem being…

Would she be mad at me, for doing nothing?

I mean, the least I could had done was something, but I did nothing, absolutely nothing.

I really hope that me re-doing this chater doesnt lose any readers. fingers-cross

review please!!