As on cue, some of the darkness subsided, and slowly but surely a new day had begun as the sun rose in the little town of Tree Hill, North Carolina. They watched it rise in silence, it was not a long process, but it deserved the necessary stillness. When the sun found its place in the sky for the day, words were spoken.
"We have another day," it was not Brooke or Jamie, but another recipient of the necessity of the sun rising – Haley.
The two on the car turned to see Haley. Brooke had to stare at her friend because she was almost certain that there were rays of hope being emitted from Haley. She truly saw the day anew, and if Haley could find hope in the devastation, then Brooke better try a little damn harder to do the same.
"Momma," the little boy cried out to his mother. Every time that Jamie saw Haley now it was the same outcries of joy. It was as if it was the first time, in actuality they just had time to make up. He noticed the Haley's hope emission as well, it was about time. There were too many mornings that Haley woke up to the harsh grunts of Nathan or fear of what could happen. Today was different, and the sun rising just solidified her purpose in the world. First, foremost, and always she was a mother to a precious little boy, and secondly she was a candidate for the best friend that ever lived. Haley just had to make sure she upheld her standards, which up until today had been lacking. She was grateful for the raising sun.
Haley helped her son off the car and embraced him. There were not many mornings in which she was free to hold him like this. Too many mornings had been filled with worry or fear as Jamie was being pushed out of the house to Skillz or Lucas. But not this morning. She had to admit that in the back on her mind she wondered about Nathan, but those thoughts would not surface. She was with her son right now, and he needed to be her only focus – if only that had been the case for the past four months things might have worked out better.
"We watched the sun rise, it was dark and now the whole sky is lit up."
"It is an amazing thing to watch isn't it, and you sure had good company," Brooke was always the best person to have around. She was there when Haley feared that the sun would not rise. Brooke assured her that things would never be over because the sun rose with everyday. And if Haley needed proof, Brooke was willing to watch each morning – and until Haley herself believed in, the girls woke up many mornings before the sun lit up the sky.
"Aunt Brooke said it was something you just have to see. I knew that the sun went up and down each day and night, but she was right, now I know for sure."
Haley extended her hand to Brooke to help her get off the car. The girls embraced – hugs were missing from their diets. Speaking of food, Haley was going to try again, "How about some breakfast, how does pancakes sound?"
Haley was waiting for Brooke's response, but she got her son's first. "Will you make the ones with the smiley faces?"
"Of course," grabbing his chin to give him a butterfly kiss. "How about you go wake up your Uncle Lucas, I bet he would want some too."
Any chance to wake up someone from his or her slumber, Jamie would easily comply. He was off with Haley's last words.
Smiles emerged on the remaining two's faces, Jamie was like the sun, he lit up the space in which he occupied.
Haley returned to Brooke, "How about you, would you like some smiley faced pancakes?"
It was the moment of truth, "That sounds delicious," Brooke was hunger for more than food right now. She was glad that Haley seemed pleased with her response. Brooke did not have an eating disorder, though she knew her self-conscious eating habits were not healthy. She was conditioned by Victoria, and everything she put in her mouth she questioned because she feared where it would end up on her body. Victoria had made it extremely clear.
Haley couldn't let it be any longer, she wanted to know what had caused the change in Brooke's appearance. She hypothesized it had been Victoria; she seemed to have been the reason for so much. But she wanted to hear it from Brooke's lips, so that maybe once Brooke said it aloud, she would realize that no matter what Victoria had said or would say, it was Brooke's body, and she was the one doing the harm to it. "Brooke," she began, but she really didn't know how to format a sensitive enough question. She put a hand on Brooke's arm because she was heading towards the door.
"What is it, Haley?" Brooke feared that the emissions were being dissolved, but this wasn't Haley's reason for concern. It was about her. She was going to have to get used to this.
"Brooke," she said her name again to give her some more time in conjuring the correct words, "you are so thin." It was another statement of truth, another time spoken. She couldn't ask her why, when she knew the answer. Haley wanted Brooke to know how concerned she was, but telling Brooke something she already knew did not seem to be the best method. Regardless, it was the only one she had.
Brooke knew, she knew it all. But the weight of Haley's words seeped in a little deeper than her own knowledge. She knew she was too thin, it was her lifestyle and it was Victoria. Damn, Victoria. Brooke just chose not to do anything about it; the look in Haley's eyes gave her a reason to become more conscious about what she was doing. She had a reason to fight now, the girl in front of her, and the precocious little boy inside waking up his uncle. "Haley, you don't have to worry."
"Of course I have to worry," she didn't give Brooke a chance to finish her statement.
"Let me finish. I know you are worried about me for various apparent reasons now. I am aware. I look at myself in the mirror, and wonder what has happened to that girl from high school – both mentally and physically. She has seemed to have disappeared. But the girl in the mirror had been through a lot and she suffered. I suffered," she finally admitted truthfully.
"But if you knew what was going on, why did you let your health continue to decline?"
"I can give you one word or a whole book."
"Victoria."
"Of course it was about her. She has such a control over my life, such a tight grasp. Over the years she told me how things were, and I accepted them. And truthfully they had led to prosperity. I listened and more clients came in; I listened and more expensive clothes were created. Whenever I seemed to listen, things happened, good things. I dropped any guy she told me, I attended all the important events, I met the right people, was at the right places. Well apparently I was at too many of these right places, maybe too much wine or cosmopolitans. National Inquiry put me on the cover of its magazine claiming I was pregnant – ever heard of a falsely claimed bulge as impending motherhood? Victoria did not like this; she did not like it at all. She said that due to my success and popularity I was going to always be in the spotlight, and I should start becoming more concerned with my appearance."
"So you stopped eating?"
"Self-consciously, I kind of did. But it didn't cease, I promise you that. I commend full-figured models to grace my covers. I don't know how it got to this point. But once it did, I thought it suited me better. Society and Hollywood keeps telling us you have to be the prettiest and the thinnest, I thought I was doing the right thing."
"It was at the expense of your health."
"I am not sick, Haley."
"It is a type of sickness, what you are doing to your body is a type of sickness."
"What about you?"
"What about me, Brooke? Does this always happen? When you become the main topic do you always put it back on the other person?"
"I do not want the attention."
"You are a famous designer."
"It is different," she paused because she knew exactly what she was going to say, "Haley. It is called avoidance, and it is something I certainly do well. It is all I know how to excel at. Once you find something like that you just go with it. So I went with it, and I still do. I don't want to be the center of attention if that means we have to focus on something that is wrong with me. I already know, no need to dwell."
"No one is perfect, Brooke."
"I wish that Victoria believed this."
"You have got to stop listening to what she has told you."
"It is not that easy, Haley. How can I just release all of her words? It is bountiful."
"I am not expecting them to easily be surrendered. But I want you to consciously take a hold of what she has said to you, and I want you to separate the truths from the falsehoods."
"I will try."
"It is all I ask. Brooke, I am not trying to badger you into anything at all. I just feel as if I have let you down, and I do not want to make the same mistakes again."
"I understand, Haley. I am only hoping you understand that it is going to be a process for me because this is all new. Concern is new, the right direction is new, it is all new. Do you understand that?"
"Of course I do. Just take the time that you need to heal."
"And you will do the same?"
"I have the perfect ally."
"How about some pancakes, I am starved," it was the truth. She was ready to cease her hunger, and indulge in food and in a life that better suited her.
"Let's just hope that Lucas did not start on them or we are going to have to go elsewhere," it was nice to see the change in tempo in Haley. A joke would not have graced her lips yesterday, or the day before, or a lot of days before. Her hope emission was in full gear, accompanying the risen sun, she was ready. She was ready for whatever was next. Whatever that may be.
The two turned towards back to the house when they were stopped – it seemed as if nothing that planned ever was carried out. The damn script writers had to make it difficult, always difficult lives for the girls to live. "Brooke," a familiar voice called out.
When she heard her name called she knew that she had someone's loyalty, and this loyalty came in the form of Millicent, "Millie, you didn't have to come."
Millicent was one who listened to every word that Brooke spoke, and for the most part, she believed her. She was not blind to the downward spiral Brooke's life had recently taken, she was just unsure of what the proper action was necessary. Stepping on a plane to Tree Hill was her first conscious initiative. "Yes I did," she spoke once she reached Brooke, embracing her immediately.
"Haley James Scott," she extended her hand to Millicent once she broke from Brooke.
"Nice to meet you," returning the welcome. Millicent did not know much about Haley, as she was never mentioned. Millicent didn't know the whole story, hell, no one really did. Her secret was though that she had read Lucas' novel, and more than once. Brooke hid the book in one of her desk drawers. Millicent knew that Brooke didn't mention or like to speak of her past, but no one can really live freely without remembering. For the past had brought her where she was today, no one can forget that.
"We were just about to have pancakes, would you like to join us?"
"I would love too, but I can't," she went from addressing Haley to addressing Brooke. "Brooke, I spoke with the board, they agreed to move the meeting back until noon. I have a flight booked for us in an hour, we must leave now."
"I can't."
"Brooke, you will lose your company."
"It will always be my company regardless if I attend this meeting or not," gaining some strength from Haley's reassuring words. "This is what Victoria wants, and she can have it. It has been controlling my life for far too long. I want to live now; I do not want to be held down anymore. Not from this company and certainly not from my mother."
"She is going to make you appear incompetent, Brooke," Millicent didn't want Brooke to give up this easily. She felt as if Brooke was throwing away so much prosperity. But again, Millicent didn't know the whole story.
"It doesn't matter," nonetheless, she saw the look in her assistant's eyes.
"How can you say that, Brooke? Of course it matters. Victoria has controlled every aspect of your company and your life. If you show up today then you can finally prove her wrong. She has probably already hired someone to redesign your office. Shock her, and show up. Let her know that she does not control you, and you are completely capable to making your own decisions."
Haley knew what she said to Brooke the night before, but Millicent had valid points, "Brooke, I agree with Millicent, I think you should go to the meeting."
Brooke was flabbergasted, Haley was basically contradicting herself. "A meeting cannot change anything."
"It can change everything, Brooke. You just have to believe it," Millicent was not going to give up.
"Brooke, the decision is ultimately yours. But if you show up today at this meeting, you will prove that Victoria is the unstable one. Which we knew all along. You are strong, but she has conditioned you to believe that you are weak. You are not weak, Brooke. You are Brooke Davis, and you are not your mother's daughter."
"I understand what this all means to you, I really do. I will stand by you whatever you may decide. You have always supported me; no matter how many times Victoria tried to fire me. And I will stand by you."
"You are so getting a raise, Millie," lightly squeezing the girl's hand.
"Brooke, tell me your reasons for not going," Haley needed to help Brooke regain her strength, and today her words might just be powerful enough. She had Brooke to thank, so she was repaying her gratitude.
"I just got here," she didn't want to leave, not yet. She wasn't ready. The reason she was in Tree Hill in the first place was to run and hide from her life in New York. She was not ready to face her demons, or her reasons for running. And she wanted to stay with Haley and her son. They were her family, and she just wished that she believed that from day one.
"You can come back, this is your home."
"I promised Jamie I wasn't leaving. Lucas will be right, I will just be another statistic, and I don't want to do that to him," maybe she could stay for a little boy after all.
"He will understand, Brooke."
"I don't want him to be forced to understand. I told him I was not going anywhere. I promised him I would heal his mother. I cannot renege on both."
"Brooke, today I woke up with so much hope, and I have you to thank for that. You accomplished your objective to my son."
Not so fast, Haley Scott, "Haley, one day cannot fix four months," it was always about Haley, it had to be. She sure hoped her friend did not return to her naivety roots and actually believed that everything was alright. This was only a small, minute step in the long, agonizing healing process. She prayed that Haley was not naïve.
"I know you are right, but the hope in my life is due completely to you. I did not have hope yesterday, Brooke."
She was relieved that Haley understood the extended period necessary for healing. Brooke just hoped she got hers as well; nonetheless, she had to get to that point first though. There was no way she was in the realm yet, she was still pained, and until it was completely confronted, the process of wholeness was still missing in action. "Come with me," this was another statement in which slipped out of her mouth without chance of retrieval.
"What? You want me to come to New York with you? Brooke, you know I can't. I cannot leave."
"Leave who, Haley?" it was a partial test.
"I cannot leave Jamie, and I cannot leave Nathan, not yet," this might have been the first test that Haley James Scott had failed.
"He has got to support himself."
"He is still weak. He is still angry. He is still hurt."
"We will fly back tomorrow. If we stay here, you wouldn't be able to see him either. What is a couple hundred miles between you going to do?"
"I cannot predict the future, Brooke; I don't know what could happen. But I do know that if something goes wrong, terribly wrong, I will be too far away to fix it."
"When are you going to realize that Nathan needs to fix it, you cannot do it for him?"
"I…I want to be the one."
Brooke's fears were coming true; the hope surrounding Haley was slowly slipping away. She could not let this happen, so much progress had been made, and it could not slip away in seconds. "I will make a deal with you. You willing?"
"What is the deal?" she was curious.
"You come to New York with me, Jamie too, and I confront Victoria in person. We come back, together, and you can confront Nathan," she was unsure how this idea popped into her head. There was no way that she would willingly speak with Victoria in person, she cringed at the thought. The latter of the deal was not too simple either. But it is what Haley needed, and under it all, Brooke realized that speaking with Victoria is what she needed. This thought solidified another reason for coming home. It was the breakthrough she needed in her life right now, and home sweet home contributed.
Haley had to quit being the person that she thought Nathan needed, and start being the person that she was underneath. It was for her five year old son, and it was for her. She needed to let Nathan know how she felt; it would be a four month release of pain and heartache. It would be another necessary step she needed to take at this time. Nathan could hold onto the unstoppable fears, because she was done with them, and the pain it brought. It was Nathan's turn to hurt. "Deal," Haley extended her hand to Brooke. Haley knew what she personally needed, and she knew what her friend needed as well. Brooke needed to confront Victoria, and release her pains. It was Victoria's turn to hurt.
Brooke encased Haley into another hug; it was so nice to have a long lost friend back. It was nice to finally have the support she needed, not the discouragement of wrong-doing. It was nice to finally have a proper track to be following. She had lost direction a long time ago, and she feared her senses would never return.
She let go of Haley and encased Millicent into a similar hug. "Thank you," she whispered in her ear. Brooke had never really been affectionate with Millicent, actually anyone in New York, she had been conditioned not to. But Millicent was her plane ride to New York; it was her ticket out of her melancholy. It was her ticket to the first step of removing her masked façade. It was her real ticket home.
"I guess I have to tell Jamie to put the pancakes on hold," she said running towards the house. Pancakes would have to wait for another day.
"Millicent, I cannot thank you enough. But can I ask you why?"
"Why what, Brooke?"
"Why are you doing this for me? I am not worth the effort."
"You are worth every single ounce Brooke."
"I haven't been a very good boss to you."
"You do not give yourself enough credit," something that was dually noted in all of Tree Hill. "I would still be selling magazines over the phone if it wasn't for you, Brooke. And you stick up for me; you stick up for me every single time. No one has ever done that for me, Brooke. I have always been a nobody, and I felt like a somebody with you."
"You were always a somebody, Millicent."
"No, I really wasn't. I sold magazines over the phone so I wouldn't have to face the real world. I was never popular, never had that many friends, not like you. Regardless of my previous status, you allowed me into your fancy world, Brooke. No one has ever invited me in."
"It was their losses, because I got a pretty kick-ass assistant, and an even more kick-ass friend," it was the first time that she said it aloud to Millicent. Employer and employee do not have to be friends; they do not even have to like each other – exhibit A: Brooke and Victoria, but Millicent had blossomed into a friend over the years. With out her, "I do not know where I would be without you. There was no way I could have handled the company or my mother. So many days I just wanted to quit, quit at everything, but you assured me it would be worth it. And today it is worth it. Thank you, Millie."
"Thank you, Brooke," they had their own appreciation for each other.
"Okay, enough of that gushy stuff, I got to save my tears for later," just imagining what was in store for her with her confrontation with Victoria. There was no way in hell, she could possibly remain tearless. And if tears do fall, it does not make her weak, it makes her purely alive. Damn, Victoria for making her believe anything else. "Want to meet the cutest boy in the whole world, who just happens to be my godson, so I might be a little bias?"
"I want to meet the boy who puts a smile on your face," she looked at the beaming smile coming from Brooke's face, and saw how real it was. It was not plastered on, Millicent wanted to meet the person who allowed Brooke to reveal herself – even if it was just a smile. For it was more smile than she had ever seen. That James Lucas Scott was truly the healer of all.
AN: We got some hope, things are starting to look up, I promise. It will not be perfect, not yet, but there is still time for a lifetime of happiness. We just have to get to that point. Anyways, thanks for the reviews. Happy Holidays. Peace.