No Happy Ending or Maybe So

Ch. 13 A Sad Story to Tell

The day had gone by so slow for Peyton, but she was getting used to that. She thought that things were supposed to get easier as time passed, but the reality that Julian was never coming back began to really sink in. They had all of these dreams together, and now that is all they would ever be. She didn't understand why people she loved were always taken from her. They promise not to leave and to always be around, but in the end they always leave. She had no idea how she was going to tell her children the truth about their father. She knew that Lucas was really Julie's father, but Julie didn't know that. They had both agreed to keep that part a secret for a while. It would be way too much for one little girl to handle. Peyton knew that she couldn't keep Julian's death a secret from them forever, and she knew she would have to prepare herself to be strong for them because they needed her more than ever.

"Hey Peyton," Brooke said as she sat down on the couch next to her distraught best friend. "Don't you think it is time that you told them about their dad?" Brooke asked.

Peyton sighed, "I can't."

"You have too Peyton. They are going to start wondering why he isn't around," Brooke took Peyton's hand. "I'll be there for you every step of the way," Brooke reassured her.

"How do I expect them to understand if I don't?" Peyton asked her.

"I don't think death is ever understood Peyton, but they have to know he isn't coming back."

"Brody is only two, and Julie is four. This is going to be too hard for them," Peyton was trying to come up with ever excuse she could think of.

"Peyton, they are going to start asking questions, and that is going to be a lot harder than you just telling them the truth. You can do this I know you can," Brooke was trying to help as much as she could.

"I know," Peyton breathed heavily.

……………………………………………

Lucas had left Brooke's a few hours ago. He and Peyton both agreed that he should give them their space until Peyton was able to tell them the truth. He finally stopped driving around and ended up at Haley and Nathan's. He was going to tell them about being a father.

"Hey," he said as he entered the house. Haley and Nathan were sitting on the couch. They sensed that he was in a much better mood.

"Hi to you too," Haley said. She was surprised to see him so cheerful.

"What's up with you man?" Nathan asked.

"Why would anything be up?" Lucas questioned as he sat down in the chair beside them.

Haley gave him a look, "Because you have been Mr. Depression since Peyton got back into town."

"Well things change," Lucas added.

"Oh my God you can't honestly expect to get Peyton back so soon after her husband died?" Nathan couldn't believe his brother was already making plans to make a play for Peyton.

"No, oh God no," Lucas said shaking his head. "Peyton needs time. I know that she loved Julian, and I'm gonna be there for her, but we'll never be together. It just wasn't meant to be for us," Lucas told them.

Haley was still staring at him trying to figure out what had him so happy, "Then why are you in such a good mood?"

"You guys want to hear a secret?" he asked. He really was extremely happy about being a father.

"Uh yeah," Haley said.

"I'm a father," Lucas said smiling.

"What?"

"Excuse me?"

They both said at the same time. "Julie is my daughter," Lucas told them.

"How?" Haley wondered.

"Well Haley when a man and a…." he trailed off as Haley threw a pillow at him.

"You know what I mean," Haley glared at him.

"I thought she was Julian's," Nathan said. They were all very confused.

"Yeah so did I, but she's mine. She has my blood type," Lucas informed them. "Peyton lied to all of us."

"I can't believe that she didn't tell us," Haley looked a little mad.

"Hey she didn't tell anyone," Lucas said.

"Did Julian know?"

"Yeah, he knew," Lucas sighed.

"How did you take the news?" Nathan asked him.

"At first I was pissed. I felt like she was turning me into Dan, but I realized that I was the only one that could turn myself into Dan, and it was up to me whether I was going to be there for my daughter," Lucas told them. He was confident that he was doing the right thing.

"So have you told Julie yet?"

"No, and we're gonna wait awhile. For now I'm gonna be the cool Uncle Lucas."

"Can you handle that?"

"Ya as long as I am apart of my daughter's life I don't care," Lucas told them.

……………………………………………

Peyton and Brooke walked into the room Brody and Julie had called theirs for two weeks. It was stocked full of toys thanks to Brooke. It was a little kid's dream, and a mother's worse nightmare. Julie was playing with her dolls, and Brody was ramming his trucks against the wall.

"Hey guys can you come over here and sit on the bed?" Peyton asked taking a deep breath. She felt Brooke's hand on her back.

"We're really busy here mommy," Julie informed her as she continued to play with her dolls.

"This is important," Peyton told them as she took a seat on their bed. "Please come over here."

"Fine," Julie said as she threw her dolls down. She had a very big attitude.

Brooke went and picked Brody up and placed him on the bed.

Peyton already had tears rolling down her face. She had not prepared herself to ever tell her kids that the man they loved was gone forever.

"Mommy, what's wrong?" Julie asked her mom. She was very perceptive and always knew when something was wrong with her mom.

"Well do you guys remember when your fish Costello died?"

"Yeah, you and daddy said it went to heaven," Julie told her. Peyton was glad she remembered.

Peyton thought back to that moment. She was hoping to remember words that he had said on that day.

Flashback:

Peyton and Julian were holding the bowl that contained the remains of Julie's dead fish. "What are we going to tell her?" Peyton was worried that Julie would throw a fit about the fish being gone forever.

"We won't tell her anything. We will just buy her a new fish," Julian told her.

"That's lying Julian," Peyton gave him a look. She wasn't about to lie to her child about a fish.

Julian sat the fish bowl down, "I know, but sometimes you have to lie. We have that right as parents."

"Oh ok so what would you tell her if I died?" Peyton asked.

He shook his head, "That's not funny because you aren't going to die," Julian said.

"There is always a chance. You can't lie to her about that. What would you tell her then?"

He grabbed Peyton's hand, "I hope that I never have to tell Julie or Brody that you are gone because that would mean I wouldn't have you in my life, and I don't know what I would do without you," he kissed her hoping he had avoided the conversation.

"Answer my question," she demanded.

"Ok fine," he knew he had been defeated. "If I were to lose you I would probably tell them that sometimes things happen that we can't control, and they make us sad. I would tell them that although they can't see you or talk to you anymore that you are watching over them in heaven. I would explain heaven to them, and tell them that you were a beautiful angel giving God hell everyday," Julian laughed at the last part, but he was serious about the rest.

Peyton hit his arm, "You made that sound so easy. I guess that's what we have to do with the fish," Peyton thought.

"Yeah I guess so," Julian kissed her forehead. "Don't make me ever think about losing you again. That is way too hard."

"I know, but you had a good answer," Peyton kissed him.

That day they had told Julie about the fish. Julian explained it perfectly to her. Peyton thought that he made everything so simple and knew from that day on that she was meant to be with Julian Baker.

Peyton sat there for a moment trying to collect her thoughts and form her words. She hope that she would find the right words, and then she realized that the words had already been spoken before, and all she had to do was use them.

"Mommy," Julie wined.

"I'm sorry," Peyton said. She fidgeted with her hair and took a deep breath, "Sometimes things happen that you can't control and those things make us sad. I'm so sorry guys but you're daddy…" she trailed off and Brooke rubbed her back reassuring her that she had the strength to say the words. The kids were looking at her a little confused. She had tears in her eyes, "When we were in the accident your daddy got very sick, and he's in heaven now," Peyton was shaking.

"Like Costello?" Julie asked.

"Yeah, honey like Costello," Peyton looked up to the sky. "He is looking down on you too right now," Peyton reassured them hoping that was true.

"Me want to see him," Brody said making Peyton's heart skip a beat.

"Honey you can't see him anymore, but he is watching over you. He is an angel. He is your guardian angel, and if you ever get scared just look up at the sky, and pray, and your daddy will help you."

Brooke was proud of Peyton. She was doing an amazing job.

"I know you are going to miss him, but we should try to remember all the good times we had with him," Peyton was trying really hard to hold back her tears, but it wasn't working.

"I miss him a lot mommy," Julie said. She could tell her mommy was upset. She took wiggled herself into Peyton's arms and gave her hug, "But it will be okay mommy. We have each other," in that moment Peyton was relieved at how well her daughter was handling the news.

"Me too," Brody said as he jumped into his mommy's lap.

"I think daddy will like heaven. He always said it was a nice place," Julie said as they all hugged, and Peyton cried.

Brooke watched as the little family sat together. She exited the room and gave them sometime.

Peyton came out of the room an hour later. "They are both asleep," Peyton said as she wiped her eyes. Brooke walked over to Peyton and hugged her. "What do I do now?"

"We sit on the couch, and you cry as long and as hard as you need to," Brooke told her as they walked to the couch, and Peyton laid her head in Brooke's lap.

Peyton hoped that everything was going to get better. Brooke knew with Lucas' help everything would get better for Peyton. Brooke was still holding out hope for the two of them to end up together.

Ok so let me know what you thought by reviewing!!!!

I think the next chapter will be about Julie and Lucas spending sometime together.