Mistake 10
I couldn't sleep that night. After Casey left my room I felt wide awake. There was only one thing I could think about.
I didn't want to forget about kissing Casey.
I knew I didn't really have to. I could replay in my head as many times as I wanted. Which was probably something I would end up doing. But I didn't just want to replay it in my head. I had the chance to really kiss her and I was half asleep at the time. She wasn't. She was wide awake.
Which is completely not fair.
I rolled onto my side and tried to force myself to think about something else.
Like Ramen noodles. That was one of my favorite foods when I was younger. But then there was one summer when I had it everyday for lunch. Now I can't stand it, which is a shame because it's extremely cheap and a great food for college students. Or at least that's what I've heard. Although Casey probably doesn't think I will make it to college anyway.
And then I was thinking about kissing Casey.
My eyes snapped open and I stared off into space.
This girl was seriously affecting my sleeping patterns.
(((((O)))))
I'm a genius. I really am. There are certain people (like teachers, my dad, my siblings, etc.) who will make several points that will seem to contradict my last statement. But if you knew what I had come up with, you would most definitely agree with me.
Now you're probably wondering what I'm talking about.
I'm not going to tell you. You will just have to wait and see.
(((((O)))))
"Casey, can we talk?" I asked. I put my hands in my back pockets and rocked back and forth slightly on my feet.
Casey looked up at me from where she was writing at her desk. "Is everything ok, Derek?" she asked.
"Can we talk?" I repeated. She nodded and gestured for me to sit at her bed. I walked in and closed her door behind me, then took a seat at the foot of her bed.
"What's going on?"
I took a deep breath and said, "I know we said we were going to forget about it—"
"Derek, no," Casey interrupted, "We are not talking about this."
"Casey, please," I said, trying to look and sound as desperate as possible.
She sighed. "Alright, what is it?"
"Well," I said, "I need to ask you something. But it can never leave this room, ok?"
"You don't have to worry about that."
I nodded. "Right, of course," I paused for dramatic effect and then went on, "So, we… kissed." Casey looked away, turning red. "And I need an honest opinion on this. Am I… I mean… was the kiss… ok?"
Casey's eyes snapped to mine. "What?"
I didn't say anything at first. I just looked the blanket on her bed and played with a loose string. "Well, I'm not exactly sure. I know girls make out with me a lot. And I mean a lot—"
"What's your point, Derek?"
"Well… I've never been sure if they were making out with me—" she cringed, "Because I'm a good kisser or if it's just because I'm so popular."
Casey stared at me in disbelief. "You can't be serious."
"I just need your honest opinion, Case."
I made myself look as needy and innocent as possible. And it was working. I could see Casey start to melt. She was starting to feel bad for me. I could see it by the way she was looking at me.
"I—I can't really answer that, Derek," she said, "We didn't really kiss for very long and you were half asleep and I was really surprised and it all happened so fast and—"
"Ok Casey," I stopped and looked down at my shoes.
(((((O)))))
That is definitely not how it happened.
Let's rewind, shall we? We're going to go back to the part where I said:
"Well… I've never been sure if they were making out with me—" she cringed, "Because I'm a good kisser or if it's just because I'm so popular."
Casey stared at me in disbelief. "You can't be serious."
"I just need your honest opinion—"
"Cut the act Derek," she interrupted, her voice suddenly harsh, "I'm not falling for it this time. I've learned what you look like when you're acting and trying to get me to feel sorry for you. You act like you have a heart."
I rolled my eyes and sighed in disbelief, a lie quickly forming in my head.
"Why would I lie about this, Casey?" I asked.
"Maybe you want me to admit something that you can use to humiliate me," she said. Which did actually sound like something I would do. But I couldn't let her know that.
I scoffed. "You can humiliate yourself. You don't need any help from me."
"But that never seems to stop you."
She was just full of good points that night.
"Casey—"
"Get out."
She glared at me with such fierceness I was actually surprised. And I actually listened. I left her room, slamming her door behind me and then slamming my door a second later when I went to my room.
You act like you have a heart.
Her words repeated themselves in my head, over and over.
You act like you have a heart.
But I do have a heart. I act like I don't sometimes. But that's just because it's easier. When you have a heart you end up caring about people and doing things for them that you really don't want to do.
You act like you have a heart.
Well it's obvious that I have a heart. If I didn't then those seven words wouldn't be bothering me so much.
And I wouldn't care for Casey the way I do.
(((((O)))))
We were sitting on the couch, my arm around her, and we had just finished watching Singin' in the Rain.
"I hated that movie."
"You're just saying that because it's a musical," Casey said, "You just need to give it a fair chance."
"You owe me so big for making me watch that entire thing."
Casey looked up at my with a little smirk on her face. She leaned closer to me. But she didn't kiss my lips, like I expected. She kissed my neck and I involuntarily gasped. She trailed kisses up to my ear. For a second she nibbled on my ear and I moaned. Then she moved on, kissing me behind my ear. My vision went blurry for a second. I was surprised by the shivers she sent through my body, making it difficult to breathe.
I rested my hand on her knee. She jumped and giggled.
"That tickles," she whispered.
"You're a very ticklish girl," I told her, pleased that my vocal cords were still working properly.
"And you're a sucker for kisses."
I grinned at her. "Just your kisses."
And then I woke up. I hadn't even realized I had fallen asleep. It didn't help anyway. It seemed like the more I slept the more tired I got.
I was all Casey's fault.