Losing Grip

Avril Lavigne

I was left to cry there,
waiting outside there grinning with a lost stare
That's when I decided

Why should I care?

It was raining in Luca, and our favorite little theif was sitting alone on a bench. People scurried past her, trying to get out of the rain. Some gave her weird looks, but moved along. The rain was starting to pick up, but she didn't care. She felt empty inside. Lost.

She knew he was back. She'd heard it on the streets. Auron, the legendary guardian, was back from the dead. What a treat! Everyone was so excited! It was cause for a great celebration. But not for Rikku.

She had loved him so much while on their journey. She was constantly by his side. Asking him questions, getting training advice, trying to help him in any way she could. And somehow... she started to feel like he felt the same way towards her.

But she was wrong.

How could he not tell her? How could he not let her know that he was... unsent? That he was going to die? It wasn't fair. If anyone had the right to know, it was her! She cried for months after he was sent. For some reason, she couldn't pull herself together. She couldn't make her usually happy face light up anymore. No one knew what to do with her. Yuna tried to comfort her, but nothing helped. When Auron died... It was like he took her heart with him. She felt empty, and hollow. And there was nothing anyone could do about it.

And now he was back. She should be jumping for joy, right? How does one feel joy without a heart? Although she could hardly feel any emotion... One she could feel was anger. And that's what she was feeling now. She was angry at him. He left her. He lied to her. He made a promise to protect her from everything. But who can protect someone from heartbreak? Escpecially when he was the one doing the breaking.

Rikku had been out there for a few hours. No one had disturbed her, and she liked it that way. But just as she was thinking that, someone walked up beside her. She ignored them, hoping they would go away. They did not.

"You're going to catch a cold."

That voice... It sounded so familiar.

"I don't care." Even she heard the venom in her voice. She'd hoped it would be enough for the man to back off. It wasn't.

"You should go inside, Rikku."

And then she remembered. Her eyes widened, and her head started to spin. Before she knew it, her anger boiled over and she jumped up taking a defensive position.

"Get away from me!" She was irrational, and he could tell. Thank goodness no one was around to see this.

He took a step forward. "Rikku, please--"

"No! I told you to get away from me!"

He stepped forward.

She lowered her tone to where she was almost growling. "Auron. I mean it."

That didn't phase him. He only closed the distance between them. At first she started to retreat, but she quickly changed her mind. She went at him and started pounding her fists against his chest. Her fists were starting to hurt, so she knew she probably was doing more harm to herself than to him. That didn't matter though. It was making her feel better. She kept beating against him until she felt her fists start to throb. He could feel her blows getting weaker, and he grabbed her hands so she would stop hurting herself. She tried using her whole body to break away, but to no avail. He was too strong.

"Auron, let me go!" Her voice sounded choked up.

He only pulled her closer. Weakly, she kept jerking every so often to try and get away. One of his arms wrapped around her waist as he pulled her even closer to him. She could only feebly push against him at that point. Perhaps she should of slept last night.

He put his free hand under her chin, and lifted it up so he could look at her eyes. The rain had eased up a little, but it was still enough to give Rikku hope that he couldn't see her tears. As he looked down at her, his heart felt like it was bleeding. He knew he had caused her so much pain... But he was back now. And he was going to make things right.

"Rikku..." he whispered.

"Why?" she burst out. "Why did you leave me Auron?" There were no mistaking her tears now. "You left me here... all alone.. How could you?!" She shook her chin out of his grasp, and cried into his chest. He hugged her tight.

"I am so sorry, Rikku." His voice sounded husky and firm in her ear. "I had to. But I'm back now. And I'm not leaving you. Not again. Never again."

She looked up at him again. "Promise me." Her voice cracked in desperation.

He put a hand on her cheek. "I promise."

Then he crashed his lips onto hers. It suprised her, but it didn't take her long to wrap her arms around his neck and kiss him back. They were both soaking wet and drenched to the bone, but Rikku had never felt so warm. And neither had Auron. Their kiss ended with the promise of many more.

And for the first time in a long time, Rikku smiled.

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A/N: My ipod HATES ME. The last few songs are not romantic... So I'm going to have to spin them. Like I did with this one! :D

I'm very satisfied with this story. I wanted these to all be fluffy and light, but I see now that that is not possible. But hey, this story was good right? I think we can take just a bit of angst. Aurikku does have a darker side, yes?

Gimme some feedback, yo! ^.~