Endless Summer Nights Chapter 12, a grey's anatomy fanfic

The song used in this update is A Fine Frenzy's Almost Lover...

Meredith runs her fingers over the cool glass as the scenery passes beneath her. She can't believe it's over. She can't believe that it's done. Everything feels so cold. She feels so alone. It's done. It's over. So over. She closes her eyes, forcing the tears to remain at bay. Instead, images of last night appear on the back of her eyelids like a movie being projected onto a screen.

Your fingertips across my skin
The palm trees swaying in the wind
Images
You sang me Spanish lullabies
The sweetest sadness in your eyes
Clever trick

She stares deep into Derek's eyes, both very much aware that this is their last night together. Both feeling something they have never felt before, a connection that they hate to sever, a connection that they can't sever. They stare and escape the prison of time. Time that is tearing them apart from each other as they are forced to return to the real world.

They love each other. They both know that they love the other, but neither are willing to break the rules. Neither are willing to break the rules because breaking the rules could lead to the breaking of their being.

Derek takes a step towards Meredith. He reaches his hand up through the gaping space that separates their bodies which yearn for each other and he brushes a stray strand of hair out of her eyes. His eyes are so sad. His heart is so sad.

I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

They are doing this for each other. They don't want to leave the other hurt. They know that it could never work. Long distant relationships don't work. They just don't.

Meredith leans into his touch, his fingertips sending chills down her spine as he trails them softly over her cheekbone. She wore her hair down for him. She knows how much he likes it when she wears it down.

Derek tilts his head to the side. He needs to say it. He needs to tell her.

Derek: Mer..

Meredith knows what he is thinking and she can't. She can't hear it. If she hears it, it will only make it that much harder to leave him. It will only make it that much harder to leave him in the morning.

Meredith (pleading): Please, don't.

Derek: Mer..

Meredith places her finger on Derek's lip.

Meredith: Please, Derek. Please make love to me one last time.

Derek can see the sadness in her eyes. He can see the pain.

Derek (sighing): Goodbye sex?

Meredith (sighing): Goodbye sex.

Chorus
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

Derek leans in and kisses her softly. He pulls back before leaning in once again, this time the kiss becomes heated as his fingers work through her long, silky hair. His fingers move from her hair to her shoulder. They dance lightly over her collar bone before he pushes the straps of her black cocktail dress down. Once the straps are down, the dress easily falls to the floor.

Meredith giggles into his mouth as the sudden gush of wind shocks her. She steps out of the dress as her nimble fingers begin to work at the buttons on his shirt. Tonight. Tonight they would take their time. Tonight. Tonight they are saying goodbye.

We walked along a crowded street
You took my hand and danced with me
Images
And when you left, you kissed my lips
You told me you would never, ever forget
These images

Derek's eyes travel over her naked body, drinking her in, memorizing every inch, curve, and crevice of her body.

Derek(in awe): You didn't wear anything under the dress.

Meredith smiles at him as she pushes the shirt off of his shoulders. She runs her hands slowly over his shoulders as she inhales deeply, relishing in his scent, relishing in his touch.

I'd never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

Once they are undressed, they tumble back onto the bed. Meredith giggles as Derek falls on top of her. She runs her fingers over his well-defined back as his hard cock presses into her stomach. Derek smiles down at her as he places a gentle kiss on her forehead. He doesn't want this to end. He never wants this to end.

Meredith scoots back on the bed and spreads her legs open for him. Derek looks up and sees her glistening lips waiting for him. He slowly runs his hands up his legs as he climbs up her body. He kisses her passionately, both keeping their eyes open as their tongues mingle, tasting each other for the last time.

Cristina's voice cuts into Meredith's movie as she places it on pause and turns to look at her friend.

Cristina: Mer?? Are you okay?

Meredith reaches up and wipes away a tear that she didn't realize had escaped. She looks down at her lap before turning back to the window, looking at the ocean, but seeing his blue eyes instead. She closes her eyes and her real life movie restarts.

I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine

Derek: Meredith, look at me.

Meredith looks up into Derek's deep blue eyes as he enters her. She wants to close her eyes, but forces them to remain open. She sees the way his face changes and his eyes darken as her slick walls surround him.

She wraps her legs around his waist, digging her heels into his ass. She wants to feel him deeper than he has ever been before. He has already reached depths of her soul like none before, and now she wants him to physically fill her to the brim. She arches her back into him, maintaining eye contact as his movements are slow and tantalizing.

When Meredith finally feels her climax building, she digs her nails into his back and squeezes her eyes shut.

Derek (panting): Open your eyes. I want to look at you when you come.

Meredith forces her eyes open and stares deep into Derek's eyes as her body begins to convulse and her walls tighten around him. Derek finds his release with her as they both yell out in pleasure.

Derek collapses on top of Meredith as he tries to regain his breath. Meredith runs her nails up and down his spine, relaxing him even more. This is something that she always does. She finds comfort in doing it, and he finds comfort in her doing it.

Derek reluctantly pulls himself out of her and rolls onto his side. He pulls her body up next to his as he kisses her hair and neck. His hand run down her sides and come to rest on her hips. His thumb moves in circles over her hip bone, lulling her into a sleep.

Derek: Nap?

Meredith: Nap.

Derek chuckles as he pulls her even closer into him. He wishes that they could just meld into one, then he wouldn't have to say goodbye. Then he wouldn't have to lose her. Then, she wouldn't be his almost lover, but his always lover.

He hears her breathing deepen and lays his head down on the pillow next to hers, inhaling her intoxicating scent.

Derek(sighing): I love you.

Derek feels his eyes grow heavy and falls into a deep sleep with the love of his life in his arms.

Did I make it that
Easy to walk right in and out
Of my life

Meredith (whispering into the night): I love you too.

Cristina: Mer, you're not alright.

Meredith looks over at her friend, her person. Cristina can see the sadness in her eyes.

Meredith: No. I'm not.

Cristina's mouth falls agape.

Cristina: You fell for him. You love him.

Meredith looks down out the window.

Meredith: Yeah….I love him. But it doesn't matter.

Cristina: Why the hell not?

Meredith: Because he's gone and it's over. He's gone and it's over and…

Cristina: What?

A small sob escapes from Meredith.

Meredith: I'm pregnant.