A/N: Okay, so, I wanted you to know that originally, I was going to start in on the epilogue of this fic right after this update. There was to be a series of about three or four of them. But because my dear friend Aqua Bubbles asked so very nicely, I am going to extend it as far as I can. If you, for some reason, object to this, and you have better reasons than Aqua Bubbles for ending the fic, do let me know and I'll take them into account.
Eww. I just brushed my teeth and then ate a passion fruit flavored tic-tac. Not a good combination.
So, this update is dedicated solely to the one, the only Miss Maggsie in all her splendid glory. Yes, I know, she just got an honorable mention in chapter thirty-seven. But, alas, she is a greedy monkey, and I am easily persuaded.
If anyone else wants their name in print, one of the following things must happen; a) you leave me a really long, really nice review, b) I use an idea you give me, c) be a first time reviewer, d) annoy the hell out of me/flirt with me until I crack and mention you just to get you to shut up…or e) blackmail. Oh, or promise to dedicate your fic/next chapter to me.
See? Easy peezy. Now shoo, go read and, of course, REVIEW!
Oh, no wait- new thing. I've decided to start asking questions to force feedback. This post's question; Which is your favorite child in the Sidle-Willows household and why? Alternatively, you can tell me which character you think is the most two-dimensional and needs more work. THANK YOU! Myx
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The day of the wedding dawned bright and summery. I woke up to Sara watching me, not six inches away. My head jerked back instinctively.
"Morning," she whispered, a soft smile playing at her lips.
"Mmm." I yawned. "Morning to you, too." I leaned in for a quick kiss. "What time is it?"
"A little after six. "
"Any sound of pitter-pattering little feet?"
"Not yet. Matthew needed a bottle and change about an hour ago, but I let you sleep through it."
"My mother and sister are coming over at seven. Along with the makeup artist, the hair stylist, the photographer and Joni Burr."
"Why Joni Burr?"
I shrugged. "Last minute alterations. Bit of a hemming crisis. Nothing to worry about."
She nodded. "I need to pick up the band and drive them to the park at around nine. Then I'm headed over to Greg's until the ceremony." She smiled, "I guess we'd better get going."
I grinned back and kissed her again. "I guess you're right. Why don't I hop in the shower and then you can take one while I get breakfast going for the girls."
Sara looked thoughtful. "Why don't we conserve water and share a shower? And then, while you make breakfast, I can stand right behind you, and kiss your neck while going in for the occasional grope?"
"Hmm," I purred. "I love that you're so worried about the environment."
"That's me. Always looking for ways to save energy. You know," her hand dipped to my exposed belly button and up under my shirt to rest on the curve of my side. "I bet if you just went without clothes we could forego the use of the air conditioning today."
"And I bet, if I went without clothes, we would never make it to the ceremony at one o'clock."
At those words, Sara flipped me onto my back and straddled me, her hands on either side of my head, holding her up. "Happy Wedding Day, Catherine."
I smiled serenely. "Happy Wedding Day, Sara."
She searched my eyes seriously. "Sometimes I still can't believe that I wake up next to you everyday. I can't believe that I somehow manage to deserve you."
"You're all I want, Sara. Just you and our little family."
She smirked. "Little? You think we need another one?"
My eyes widened. "Please, God, tell me you're joking."
Her expression was serious for about two seconds before she burst out laughing. "Completely. But you should have seen your face."
"It's our wedding day, and you're pulling tricks on me?" I punched her in the arm. "What the Hell is wrong with you?"
"Ow! What? C'mon, Cat. It's part of my charm, remember? We love each other, and today we are committing to each other for the rest of our lives. Let's just keep our eye on the prize, okay? Now, let's get back to that shower idea."
"You think you're getting some after that little stunt?"
"Uhh…" She paused for effect. "Yes?" She flashed a gap-tooth smile.
One corner of my mouth twitched. "Start the water."
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"Catherine," my mother stood in the doorway, hands on her hips. "it's eleven thirty, we need to get you dressed."
"What do you want me to do, mother? Not feed the baby?"
"She's nine months old. She can practically feed herself. It's your wedding day, Catherine."
I ground my teeth. "I didn't know that. Really?"
"Don't be smart with me."
"What are you going to do? Put me in a time out?" I sighed. Here I was. In full makeup, nails manicured, hair curled and swept up with calla lilies pinned into it. In my red plaid pajama bottoms and a white tank top. In my kitchen. With a nine month-old baby balancing on my hip, holding her own bottle and chugging it like she'd never eaten in her life. On my wedding day, and I was being reprimanded like a small child.
"Mommy?" I heard Ayla call down the stairs.
"Yeah, baby?"
"I can't find me and Maggie's white tights."
"On my bed, under your dresses. Have you both taken showers?"
"Yep! But we need to dry our hair."
I eyed my mother determinedly. "Nana will help you with that, and I'll be up soon."
"Okay, Mom."
"There, now, will you please go and help them? I will be up in ten minutes and then we can get the dress on. The limousine will not be here for another thirty minutes, and it does not take twenty minutes to zip up a dress."
My mother raised her hands in surrender. "Okay, fine. Don't listen to me. What do I know? I'll be upstairs if you need me."
When I was alone in the kitchen again, I looked down at my baby girl. "I am a forty-two year-old woman." I began seriously. "I have five happy, healthy children, a successful, brilliant, beautiful fiancée, a college degree, a career I love, and house with no mortgage. Why does she insist on treating me this way?"
Her little brow crinkled, she seemed to think about it. "Iggy agah uhjaja," she babbled at me. Then she gave a big grin, showing me her two teeth on the bottom, and then offered me her bottle.
"For me?" I smiled, "Thank you! I feel much better now. Are you all done, Firecracker?" Using the sign for 'all done', I waved my hand side to side, questioning. She repeated the motion, then she squealed and kicked her feet- her signal to be put down. Now that she had learned to crawl, there was no stopping her. We had to put baby gates on everything. "Not today, wild one. Today, you are coming with me. We have a pretty pink dress for you!" She scrunched up her face, seemingly less than thrilled with the prospect.
We marched upstairs into my room, where Lindsey had just finished getting dressed. She looked so beautiful. The dress had little spaghetti straps made of silk chord and it fell to the floor. She had on high silver heels, and dangling silver and pearl earrings. The make up artist had given her a full makeover, complete with blush, eye shadow, and lip gloss. In that moment, I could see what she would look like in a few years as a woman.
She twirled around, smiling. "Do you like it?"
I would not cry, I just had my makeup done.
"Mom? What's the matter?"
I shook my head, "Nothing, you just look so grown up. I can't believe you're already twelve years old."
"Practically a teenager!" Lindsey beamed.
"Yeah, you're almost there. You look spectacular, Linds."
"Thanks Mom. You look…underdressed."
"Yeah, I know, here, oh no wait, the baby just ate- I don't want her to spit up on your nice dress. Let me put her in the crib." I carried her over. "Hey, little pumpkin, you stay right here while Mommy gets dressed, and then Nana is going to put you in your flower girl outfit. Here, play with Mr. Monkey." I turned around to find Lindsey, Ayla, Maggie, Joni Burr, the photographer, my sister, and my mother all waiting for me. "Okay, let's get this show on the road."
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So, preened, combed and dressed, my mother, my sister, and the girls and I headed over to the park in a white limousine. The only time I had ever been in a limousine before was when I was processing a scene, or riding with rich clients in need of entertainment. Cute ass, will travel. That's what we used to say. It felt so different to be the one calling the shots. I felt like a queen.
We were all giddy, especially me, and the whole way there we were laughing and making jokes. When we arrived at the park, everything was all set up. The tents were up, the chairs were placed, the guests were arriving. Two tents had been set up to the side and back; one for me, and one for Sara. Presumably all the boys were in with Sara, because as I was walking towards my tent, Greg left the other tent and headed towards mine. He took a couple of photos as he walked.
"Hey, Cath, you look great!" He snapped another photo right in my face.
"Greg! What the hell?"
"It's always the candid shots that come out the best. You'll thank me later."
I shook my head and switched Lizzie from one hip to the other. "Is Sara here?"
"Yep, but I've been told to keep you away from her at all costs. Bad luck and everything."
"Uh-huh, well, I'll be in my little tent with all of the girls. Just send Larry over when it's time."
"You nervous?"
"No. Why? Do I look nervous?"
"A little on edge maybe, but you look gorgeous."
"Thanks, Greggo. Now shoo! I'll see you at the ceremony, okay?"
In my tent, I found not only just my girls, but also my bridesmaids, my mother, as well as Lola and Tim. Tim ushered me into the tent warmly. Today, he was sporting a metallic blue and white striped suit complete with cane and jaunty hat. "Catherine, dear, don't you just look ravishing?"
As we chatted, I continually checked my cell phone for the time. Every minute ticked by and one o'clock steadily drew nearer. My nerves began to rattle. Here we go, this was it. I was getting married today. At one o'clock on the nose, I heard the music start, and knew Sara must be walking down the aisle with Gil. She had chosen to go down the aisle to Dinah Washington's version of 'What a Difference a Day Makes.' I was going down to 'At Last' sung by Etta James. Just as the music ended, I heard someone unzip the tent from outside. Looking up, I met with kind blue eyes. Larry.
"Well, my lady Catherine, I do believe it's about that time." I smiled nervously as he kissed my cheek. My mother, Lola, and Tim, left to find their seats. The rest of the wedding party lined up like we had practiced. First Maggie, then Ayla, then Lindsey with Greg, after that came Maureen with Warrick and Nancy with Nick. And then Larry. With me on his arm. With Lizzie balancing on my hip. My music began to play. Deep breath.
At last…
my love has come along…
I could see the line start to move. Maggie would be walking with her little bouquet of white callas and baby's breath.
my lonely days over…
and life is like a song…
Now Ayla would start after her sister, one slow step at a time. My heart rate was climbing, I could feel it begin to pound in my chest.
Ooh, yeah, yeah
At last…
the skies above are blue…
My heart was wrapped up in clover…
the night I looked at you…
I could see Lindsey's blonde head moving down the aisle, and Miss Elizabeth chose that moment to notice I was wearing dangly gold earrings. And what do nine month-olds want to do with something shiny? Yank it!
"Ah! Lizzie, hang on. Ouch, Lizzie, that hurts!" Forgetting to give her the signs for 'no' and 'stop', I was more preoccupied with not getting ear ripped off on my wedding day. "Wait, wait, wait, give Mommy a second." I quickly pulled out the earring and handed it over, just praying she didn't notice my necklace.
"Aba ga?" she questioned me, adamantly.
"Yes, you play with that, okay?" Maureen was making her way down, and Nancy was next.
I found a dream
that I could speak to
A dream that I
can call my own
This was it, my turn. I squeezed Larry's arm tightly. The butterflies in my stomach were numbering in the thousands.
"Have I told you yet how absolutely magnificent you look today?" Larry turned to me as I took my first step.
"Really?" I couldn't look at him, I was busy smiling nervously at faces I recognized in the crowd.
"I've never seen a more beautiful bride."
I found a thrill
to press my cheek to
A thrill that I have never known
Ohh, yeah, yeah
Just keep walking, one foot in front of the other. That's it. Okay. I could do this. Lizzie lost interest in my earring in her grip, and became fascinated with the crowd. She continued babbling away, pointing things out to me.
"Is that a flower, Firecracker?" I whispered. "Look, do you see Nana?"
I was busy looking for my mother when Nancy and Nick separated and I caught a glimpse of something white in the corner of my eye. I inhaled sharply. It was her. My Sara. And she looked stunning.
You smile
you smile
Ooh and then the spell was cast
And here we are in heaven
We were nearly there, my whole body began to tremble. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. We stopped, and I felt Larry brush his lips against my hand. Then I took the last few steps on my own. We looked into each other's eyes and smiled in a secret sort of way. That smile was just for me.
for you are mine at last…
"Wow." I whispered.
Sara's hair was half up in a strategically arranged messy bun, held in place with silver chopsticks and adorned with white and purple calla lilies. She was in a sleeveless white satin vest, a woman's waistcoat, with a high, unbuttoned collar. It was glittering and embroidered with large white roses. Underneath, she wore cream colored wide-leg pants with a large white leather belt. The vest was an inch too short to meet with her pants and the skin that peeked through was positively delicious. The look was completed with subtle makeup, sexy silver heeled sandals, and a nine month-old baby boy perched happily on her hip.
Mattie was in a little white suit with a blue tie and blue boots. He was the handsomest little man you ever did see. When he saw me, he smiled and kicked his feet. I leant over and kissed him, leaving a pink lipstick mark on his cheek.
I eyed Sara, "I thought you wearing a suit," I said quietly.
She shrugged, "There's a jacket that goes with it."
I raised an eyebrow in question.
She shrugged again. "I got hot."
I
smiled and rolled my eyes as we turned to the minister. She smiled
encouragingly at us.
"Friends,"
she began, "we are gathered here today to share with Sara and
Catherine a very important moment in their lives. In the time they
have been together, their love and understanding of each other has
grown and matured, and now they have decided to live their lives
together as wife and wife.
"Our prayer is for this couple that they enjoy the fruits of marriage, sharing an abundance of happiness. We further pray that whatever difficulties they may encounter will be overcome by their optimism and faith in each other. Sara and Catherine, have you come here freely and without reservations to give yourselves to each other in marriage?"
"We have."
"Before we begin with the vows, the brides have expressed the wish to share their love for each other in their own words." She glanced at Sara, "You may begin."
Sara nodded and turned to me. The look in her eyes made me melt. She took a deep breath and smiled bravely. "I love you, Catherine," she began shakily. "I know no other path than to love you. For me, it is so inherent, so instinctive- I can't control it; I never could. You draw out my soul with every breath that you take. I exist for you, Catherine. And I know I always will. There was once a part of me that was incomplete, before you swaggered," she smiled into my eyes, "confident and passionate, into my life. My days were shadowed, bleached, and faded.
"But, with you…and our children- our wonderful children, that darkness has drained away, leaving in it's wake a brilliant sunrise filled with all the hues reflected in your hair, your eyes, your lips. I am astounded everyday that I have somehow managed to attract your attention, your love. Every time I set eyes on you and remember that you love me, I feel triumphant.
"But you are not a prize to be won, nor a piece of property to be coveted. You are the most amazing person I have ever met. I cherish you, Catherine. I cherish everything about you. You have my heart. You have my loyalty and love for all eternity.
"I ask you now, to spend your life with me. Through all of the diaper changes, parent-teacher conferences, all of the proms and weddings to come- all of the grandchildren." She smiled again and tears began to brim at my eyes. "I ask you to take my hand, so that we may guide each other through the many uphill battles we will face. I want to fight them. I've always fought them. But now…now I am not alone." She put her hand on my waist and moved a step closer. "Marry me, Catherine? Then I shall never be in the darkness again."
I sniffed, smiling.
"Bubba bubba ows tee!" Mattie shouted out. Sara and I had gotten so close that the twins could touch each other, and Mattie wanted the big gold earring in Lizzie's hand.
She wasn't willing to give it up. "Joe jee jazhubat!" she shouted back, and stuck the earring in her mouth.
I could see Matthew's quivering lip just before he began to wail. I couldn't do anything about it though, because I needed to get my earring back before Lizzie choked on it.
I stuck my fingers into her mouth, feeling for the piece of jewelry. She clamped hard on my finger with her two teeth. "Ow! Lizzie, we do not bite Mommy! Now c'mon and give me that!" I felt around a moment longer and found it.
Mattie was still sobbing. I looked to Sara. She hit her forehead with her palm, "Oh yeah, almost forgot." She reached down her vest, into her cleavage, and promptly produced a blue pacifier. This drew a laugh from our friends and family in the audience.
I quirked an eyebrow.
"What?" She asked, looking innocent. "No pockets."
I shook my head. Plucking a flower from my hair, I handed it over to Lizzie. I took off my other earring, just to be safe, and turned to Lindsey behind me. "Can you hold these for me, sweetie?" I handed over the earrings and realized that my hand was covered in baby drool. What to do, what to do…well…it's not like I was ever going to wear it again- and I'd have to have it dry cleaned anyway. As discreetly as possible, I wiped my hand on my dress. Problem solved, and crisis averted I looked back at the minister.
She seemed very amused. I wondered how many weddings she'd overseen, where the couple brought their kids up with them. "May we continue?" she asked. Sara and I both nodded. "In that case, Catherine, I believe you have something to say?"
Deep breath. Please, God, don't let me say the wrong thing… I met Sara's gaze and smirked. "You kinda stole my thunder there, Sidle. I don't have nearly as many fancy words or poetic devices in my vows. But I might as well give it a shot, eh? Alright, here goes," I raised my voice so that the crowd could hear me. "Sara Helena Sidle. I. Love. You. You are," I ran my hand down her arm, "the love of my life. I want to spend the rest of my life in your arms. I love your arms. I love your voice, your smile, I love your sexy neck, and everything below it." I saw a blush creep up her cheeks and I smiled. "I love your mind, your heart, your spirit. I love that you treat me like an equal and that it never occurred to you to do any different.
"I have waited my whole life for someone like you; someone who treats me with respect, who's not afraid of my emotions; who loves me as much as I love them. Who wants to raise a family with me, and who will always put our children first. I love you- you're…incredible. You are, single-handedly, the most amazing woman I have ever met.
"You're the one, Sara." I tried to convey all I was feeling with one look. "You are. You have made me the woman I have always wanted to be. And if you'll let me, I want to spend the rest of my life, not in front of or behind you, but by your side. Through anything that comes our way." I took free hand in mine. "I want to spend the rest of my life being a parent with you. Hell, I'd be happy just to spend the rest of my life on the couch with you, watching some boring documentary on plant cell analysis," I heard the crowd chuckle, "just so I can lay with my head in your lap. Forever." I gazed into her bright eyes and I felt a sense of complete serenity surround me. Why had I been nervous? This was Sara; this was my wife. "That's what this is, Sar. This is you and me and our family. You and me, babe. Forever."
Sara was smiling, laughing lightly, and there were streams of water trickling down her cheeks. Oh, God, she's crying. She can't cry! If she cries, I'll cry, and- oh, shit, my mascara! Fuck it. Christ. Women!
Ann, the minister, interrupted our little tear fest. "Catherine," she whispered, "are you finished?"
I gave a lopsided smile, "I can only say I love you in so many ways, right? Before it starts to get repetitive."
"So, we can go on?"
"Yes."
"Very well." She spoke louder, "Sara and Catherine, since it is your intention to enter into marriage, join your right hands and repeat after me.
"I, Sara,"
Sara grinned at me. "I, Sara,"
"take you, Catherine,"
"take you, Catherine,"
"to be my wife."
Her grin widened, "to be my wife."
"To have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my solemn vow."
Sara repeated every word, her eyes never leaving mine. And then it was my turn.
"I, Catherine,"
My heart was thundering in my ears so loudly that I almost could not hear Ann. But I knew what to say.
"I, Catherine, take you, Sara, to be my wife…"
When the vows were finished, it was time for the rings.
I raised my eyebrows at Sara, "Don't tell me those are down your shirt, too."
She looked sheepish, and started to reach into her vest.
My eyes widened. "Sara!"
She raised a hand in surrender, "Kidding, just kidding!"
My eyes narrowed. "Do I need to punch you again? That was not funny." But by the laughter of our friends and family, I could tell it was quite the comic act. I smiled. Why was it so easy to win me over?
Sara turned behind her and I noticed Grissom for the first time. He looked good. Handsome, even. His hair was combed, he had switched his glasses for contacts, and he was wearing a suit. This one was nicer than the brown one he always wore for court appearances. It was what my mother called 'oyster' colored, he had on a dark blue shirt underneath, and a silver-blue tie. There was no way in Hell he dressed himself.
He reached into his pocket and retrieved a small black box. I had yet to see the rings, Sara had wanted to handle them personally- and without me.
She took the box, opened it, caught the rings in her hand and gave the box back to Gil, all without me catching a glimpse of what was inside. She caught me peaking and smiled mischievously.
I shifted Lizzie's weight from one hip to the other so that I would hold out my right hand, and she placed her own ring on my palm. Looking at it, my eyes lit.
It
was two rings entwined with each other. One was silver, sleek and
elegant, the other was encrusted with diamonds all the way around.
They were crossed over one another and wouldn't come apart. I
closed my hand over at it. Sara gestured at me to give her my left
hand. I presented it, and she took it in hers.
I felt the press of
the metal against my fingertip as she began. "I
give you this ring as I give you myself, the physical evidence of my
passion and commitment," she slid the ring along and it came to
rest at the base of my finger. "May it always represent our
never-ending love."
I looked down. The ring on my finger was similar to the one in my hand. It was smaller, and more finely wrought, and the plain ring was gold while the diamond ring was still silver or, as I found out later, platinum. It was beautiful.
I smiled calmly at Sara and motioned for her to give me her hand. "I give you this ring as I give you my heart, the physical evidence of my eternal passion. Feel within it the beating of my heart and my profession of undying love." We joined hands.
Ann smiled. "Well, if that's all, then we're done here. By the powers invested in me, I pronounce you wife and wife. You may kiss the bride!"
I laughed as everyone cheered. Sara's eyes glittered and I knew mine must be shining too. We leaned in and our lips met. After a moment, I heard her mumble, "I love you…Mrs. Sidle-Willows."
I kissed her hard for a second longer. How was it possible to be this happy? "Well, I hope you know, Mrs. Sidle-Willows, that I've never been happier to hear it." I kissed her again, quickly. "And I love you, too." Lizzie pulled on Mattie's ear and we had to quickly separate.
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June in Las Vegas is going to be miserable no matter what you do. Outside, in June, in Las Vegas…Hell has colder days for weddings. Which is why we decided to have the reception inside. And that's when my mother opened her big mouth. And that's how we ended up with the reception hall at the Rampart. Granted, it is a gorgeous room. And it's twenty-five thousand dollars a day and we got it for free. That being said, no matter how nice he is to me and no matter how much attention he showers on my mother, Sam Braun is not the kind of guy you want to owe favors to. If you know what I mean. But how was I supposed to say 'no'? Saying 'no' to Sam Braun is even a worse idea than owing him a favor.
And of course, since we were using his reception hall, he had to be invited to the wedding. Which meant that at some point, I was going to have to introduce him to Sara.
But before that could happen, Sara and I had to get to the Rampart. We'd handed the twins off to my mother and my sister, they were using our car to drive all of the kids to the reception. Which meant that Sara and I were free to ride in the limousine. Alone…
We were so giddy, we couldn't stop laughing. Or kissing. When we finally settled down, a good chunk of the ride was already over.
"So, Mrs. Sidle-Willows…"
"Yes, Mrs. Sidle-Willows?"
"Nothing, I just wanted to say it again."
"I think that went pretty well, if I do say so myself."
"Splendidly, dahling, splendidly."
"Do you like your ring?"
"You're kidding, right?" I held it up to admire it. "It's perfect. It's beautiful."
"Good." She kissed me.
"What are you smiling at?"
"You. I'm just glad you're happy."
"I am happy, I am so happy."
"And why is that?"
"As soon as we get to the Rampart?"
"Yeah?"
"My thing on the side and I are getting a room."
"Oh, thank God. It would have been so awkward if you caught me making out with your Mom in the utility closet."
"…"
"Catherine?"
"…"
"Cat?"
"Eww." I made a face. "Sara Sidle-Willows, I cannot believe you just said that! That is single handedly the most disgusting thing I have ever heard in my entire life."
"You were the one threatening to run off with your mistress; I had to stop you."
"I am scarred for life."
"C'mon, give me a kiss."
"I don't know where those lips have been!"
"It can't possibly be the most disgusting thing you've ever heard, Cath. What about that sound when Doc Robbins reaches into the chest cavity of a vic and squishes the-"
"You think saying that is going to get me to kiss you?"
"Worth a try…"
"Not working."
"Okay…" She wrapped her arms around me while I faced the window mock-sulking. "What if I say…I love you?" She kissed my shoulder.
"Nope."
"What if say…You're incredible?" She kissed my neck.
"Uh-uh."
"What if I say…I'm not wearing panties under this outfit?"
I turned to her with a wicked smile. "That could work…" I kissed her deeply and slid my hand under her waistband. "Hey!" I stopped kissing her. "You are too wearing panties!"
"Never said I wasn't. But it got you to kiss me!"
I faced the window. "Well, I am not talking to you until we get to the reception."
"Cath, baby, come on."
"Nope."
And I didn't talk. I remained completely silent for the rest of the ride. Did not say a single word.
Mostly because I was too bust trading tongues with Sara. Yeah…that… that could have been it.
When we walked into the reception hall, there was a big round of applause. I threw out my arms and smiled, but Sara took a step back. I brought my hand to her back and whispered, "This is our family, Sar. Nobody's going to bite you."
"Right. Right. I know that."
"Do you want some cake?"
"Cake?" She perked up. "Where?"
I motioned. "Through the crowd." Her shoulders sagged.
Ayla appeared by our side and grabbed Sara's hand. Lindsey came up and took her other hand. "Come on, Mama. We'll take you. We all get to sit at one long table over there."
Maggie came over to me as Sara was dragged off. "Mommy, are you coming too?"
"In a minute, baby. I need to say hello to some people first. Would you like to help me?"
"Yeah!"
So while Sara got to entertain the older girls, I mingled, Maggie in tow. She just ate it up. Mostly, I chatted with Sara's friends from San Francisco. Matthew Winger's parents were there, and they delighted in seeing Maggie growing up so well. Denny, his wife, Lara, and their eighteen month-old little girl were there. Lola, of course, along with Gina and her partner Michelle, Charlotte, and surprisingly, Vicki. She had brought a date- her fiancée, a masseuse named Todd. He seemed nice, and very good for Vicki. She was happy and very pleasant towards me.
After about half an hour of schmoozing, things quieted down and people took their seats in order to get served their salmon, steak, or, of course, their vegetarian falafel. Most of the tables were round, and spread out around the wide open dance floor. Our table, the table for the wedding party, was in fact several tables pushed together to create a panel type setting against one wall, so that we could see everyone. Sara and I were in the middle, the guys and their dates were on one side, while the bridesmaids and their spouses were on the other. While the babies were in highchairs next to us, technically the girls were supposed to have a table to themselves on one end. But they kept coming to talk to us and sit on our laps, so we let them stay and pull up chairs.
Halfway through the meal, people started tapping their glasses with their forks and shouting "Speech! Speech!"
Oh, lord. I had nearly forgotten. Grissom. Was the best man. And he was expected to give a speech.
Sara lifted Maggie off her lap, handed her to me, and went over to whisper in Gil's ear.
Gil was the only member of the wedding party over the age of twelve that didn't bring a date. The bridesmaids were both married, and the guys had all found someone. Warrick's date was drop dead gorgeous. Dark brown skin, kinky reddish-blonde hair, and the biggest hazel eyes you ever did see.
I looked back to Sara who was walking back to me. Gil was standing up and walking to the microphone stand in front of and to the side of the table. He seemed to cough nervously as he unfolded a piece of paper.
"Do you know what he's going to say?" I whispered to Sara.
"No idea."
"How did you even get him to make a speech?"
"He volunteered."
"Why does that worry me?"
Sara elbowed me in the ribs and took Maggie back so that I could feed the twins to keep them quiet. I kept half an ear on the speech.
"For those of you who don't know me, I am Dr. Gil Grissom of the Las Vegas crime lab, I am a friend and a colleague to both Catherine and Sara. I wanted to make this speech so that I could share with you, but also with them, my thoughts and observations." He coughed, studied his paper, and began. "Mary Ann Evans, better known by her pseudonym, George Eliot, once said, 'What greater thing is there for human souls than to feel that they are joined for life - to be with each other in silent unspeakable memories.' I have known Catherine and Sara for many years. I've known them since before they were lovers, or mothers, or even CSIs, and I can tell you, though I'm sure you know, that no two people deserve happiness more than these two magnificent women."
Sara and I exchanged looks.
"The first time I saw Catherine, she had just gotten off of work. And although she was exhausted and upset, she still managed to be one of the most beautiful women I had ever set eyes upon. I was a lowly scientist and she took my breath away. And then I heard her speak. And I realized that as attractive as she was, more importantly, she was a smart, clever person with strong deductive reasoning skills and a good heart. And I thought to myself; she would be a great CSI someday. So, I offered her a position and a chance to further her education. In the time it took for her to earn her degree and move her way up from lab tech to criminalist, we developed a bond that has tied us together for many long years. I was able to observe first hand as she blossomed into a confident, passionate woman and mother.
I met Sara at a seminar. She had just graduated with a degree in physics, and returned to California. There were several hundred people at that seminar, but Sara was the only one to catch my attention. I had never met anyone like her. She was unbelievably intelligent, she had a quick wit and a unique mind. Her brain perceived and processed information in a way I had never seen before in anyone but perhaps myself. Not to mention she was the prettiest girl in the room."
Sara hid her head in my shoulder, blushing profusely, and I kissed her hair. Please God, let him wrap this up soon.
"I have spent many years with these women, teaching them, learning from them, and working alongside them. I have," he coughed here and shuffled his feet. "I have come to know them and have grown very fond of them. I have watched the trials and tribulations of their lives as well as their triumphs. Over the last two years, I have seen their family grow, and watched their love for their children and each other grow along with it. I have never seen them more happy than when they are in each other's presence."
Gil set down his paper and turned to Sara and I. "What all of this comes down to is that you have shaped my life for many years. You are important to me. All I've ever really wanted is for both of you to be satisfied and confident in the lives you lead. Be happy, and love each other with my blessing."
I looked over and found that Sara's eyes were liquid. I felt her hand leave mine as she stood, knocking Maggie off her lap and threw herself into Grissom's arms as he returned to the table. He barely managed to catch her. I smiled. I had a feeling that things would always remain strained between Gil and I. There was no going back; I carried the heart of the woman he loved. But at least things would rectify themselves between Sara and Gil. I knew how important that was for her and I was grateful to him.
"Mom, Mom!" I turned to see Ayla and Lindsey out of their seats.
"Yeah, baby?"
"It's traditional for the Maid of Honor to give her speech now, right?"
"Yes, sweetie, but I told you-"
"I know, I know. But I want to. C'mon." She grabbed Ayla's hand and ran around the table before I could stop her.
"Uh…Sara?"
She turned to me and I cast a meaningful glance at our two older daughters. Ayla was practically hiding behind Lindsey, but Linds was standing straight and tall.
"What's up?" Sara asked.
"Hell if I know. I think she's about to make a speech."
"I guess we'll just have to find out."
Lindsey lowered the microphone too fast and as it dropped, it gave a high pitched screech. "Shit!" she whispered. Into the microphone. The whole hall laughed.
Except Sara and I who both shouted, "Lindsey Willows! Watch your mouth!" The hall laughed again.
"Oops," she said to us before turning back to the audience, trying to quiet them down,
"Okay, okay. So, Mom said that I didn't have to give a speech, and I thought I wouldn't. Except that then we had to make up our own speech for my oral communications class, so I decided to write one anyway. So, I wrote this like, a month ago and I practiced it in front of my class. AND I should mention that I got an A+ on it, so I know it's good."
"She read it in front of her class?" Sara whispered in my ear. "Did you know about this?"
I shook my head. "Not a clue."
Lindsey glared at me. "Mom. You are ruining my moment!"
"I'm sorry, I thought it was my moment." I winked at her.
She rolled her eyes. "Anyway. As I was saying, I actually memorized the whole thing, but Ayla added some stuff at the end, so that's why I needed the paper. Okay, so. Ready? Here it is; 'My Maid of Honor Speech' by Lindsey Willows."
Sara and I smiled at each other. Here she was trying to act so grown up, and all it did was remind us of what a little girl she still was.
"When my Mom and Dad got divorced, I didn't really understand what it meant. I was confused and I was mad because I didn't get to see either of my parents very much after that." I felt the sting of her words in my chest. But she continued. "I still loved my Mom and Dad, but we were never together anymore. That meant a lot of things changed. Christmas and birthdays and weekends were all different and it took a while to get used to. I thought I would have a split up family for the rest of my life.
"Then my Dad died. And everything changed again. The night he died was one of the scariest nights of my life. But it was also the night I met Sara. I was still distraught," I heard her put emphasis on the big word and hid a smile, "but Sara made everything seem like it was going to okay. She treated me like I was normal when everyone else treated me like I was made of glass. After awhile, my Mom and Sara became friends, but I loved Sara so much that I wanted her to be part of the family. I wished for it more than anything, and you know what? My wish came true!
"When Ayla and Maggie's dads died, Mom and Sara went out to California and when Mom came back, they were girlfriends!" Sara turned and kissed my exposed shoulder. Smiling, she intertwined our fingers and squeezed my hand before returning her gaze to Lindsey speech. I hugged Maggie tight to me, and focused again on our eldest daughter, "…and that's how I got my sisters! Well, two of them anyway. So Sara and Maggie and Ayla moved in with us and we became a sort of, kind of family.
"Then we got adopted, and then we decided to have a little brother, and then Sara got pregnant. I already thought of her as my mother, but that's when we all started calling her 'Mama' and it really brought us closer together. Then, Mama got shot. I was so afraid that she would die, like Daddy, and then Mom and I would be left alone again. But she didn't, and the twins were born.
"I was so excited when my moms told me they were going to get married and I got to be the maid of honor. I was excited because of the new dress, and getting to walk down the aisle, and the party after. But mostly, I was excited because my Mom and Mama getting married meant that we were even more a real family. And even though it is slightly gross, it's actually pretty cool that they are so much in love. I love my moms, and I am really glad that they found each other, because I got my family back and because they make each other so happy."
Lindsey looked around at everybody and said, "Well, that's everything that I wrote, but Ayla wrote something else that she asked me to read." She turned to Ayla, "Are you sure you don't want to say it yourself?"
Ayla nodded and cowered away from the microphone.
"So Ayla wrote a poem, and before I start, she wants me to say that… this is the first poem she's written that doesn't rhyme and the first one that contains more mature…poetic devices such as…internal rhyme, repetition and…ass…assonance. That's it, right? That's how you say everything?" Ayla nodded again. "Okay. Here goes;
I love Movie Night when we get to pull the mattress onto the floor.
I love sliding in the mud after it rains.
I love that I get to help in the kitchen, even though I sometimes break things.
I love a lot of things.
Picking out Mommy's clothes. Splashing Mama in the pool.
I love watching Mom and Mama whisper secrets to each other and laugh.
Daddy and Papa used to do that.
I love how nobody tries to make me talk when I don't want to.
Daddy and Papa always did that.
I love a lot of things.
Store-bought Halloween costumes. Getting to stay up late on Christmas eve.
But more than anything, I love my family.
I know the concept of heaven is not logical, but I hope my dads are up there anyway.
I hope they can see me.
And my family.
My moms and my sisters and my brother.
And my nana, and my aunt, and all of my uncles.
I hope they can see me,
And see how happy I am.
Congratulations, Mom and Mama, I love you, and I always will."
Lindsey looked up from the paper just as everyone applauded. She was beaming as she walked hand in hand with Ayla back to the table. Sara scooped her up while I took Ayla in my arms. "That was wonderful! You guys did such a great job!"
"Ayla, you were so brave to stand up there the whole time."
"But I didn't say anything."
"Well, that's alright, sweet one. I know how hard it was just for you to go up there. Thank you for doing that."
"It would be strange if Lindsey read my poem and I stayed at the table. Did you like it?"
"Like it? We loved it. But you know who you forgot?"
"Who?"
"You forgot to mention Gram and G-pa Winger, and they're still your family, too, right?"
"Oops. Do you they'll be mad?"
"No, but I think you should go give them a hug and a kiss, don't you?"
"Ya. But I don't want to go out in front of all those people all by myself. Will you come with me?"
Lindsey came over to hug me. "Mommy has to stay here with Mama and everybody, but I'll come with you, Ay. Do you want to hold my hand?"
Ayla nodded and they headed off.
"That was so sweet," Sara said in my ear.
"I know. I wonder how much longer she'll be that way."
"Mmm…six months?"
"Probably. Oh, shit."
"What?"
I pointed.
"Why is your mother at the microphone?"
"To steal the spotlight. Why else?"
My mother tapped the microphone to get everyone's attention. "Excuse me, I'd like to say something."
I stood up. "What? Mother! Are you serious?"
"What? It's my daughter's wedding…hopefully her last one. I'd like to say something."
I set my jaw, crossed my arms, and flopped back in my chair like a petulant child. "Fine. I guess I can't really stop you."
"Thank you for that vote of confidence, my dear." She turned the crowd. "Now, what I just wanted to say is this; when I first heard that Catherine was dating Sara, I was somewhat less than thrilled. I didn't even want to think of it, let alone talk about it. But Catherine sat me down, and she made me talk about it or, at least, she made me listen. And when she spoke about Sara, her whole face just lit up, I had only ever seen her that happy when she was with my granddaughter. I knew then that she must be in love with this woman and I became determined to try and understand.
"Then, I met Sara, and I met her girls. They were so sweet, and I found Sara so respectful and kind and…gainfully employed." This drew a laugh from the crowd. "And she was attractive and well educated, too- a Harvard graduate, you know. Not a bad dresser, a good mother, and most importantly, she was very obviously in love with Cathy. I couldn't help but like her. I could tell that she was good for my Catherine, that she made her happy. I still didn't understand completely, but I understood that even if I didn't, I wanted to be supportive of my daughter. But it wasn't until Sara was hospitalized nine months ago that I finally realized. I was watching Catherine with Ayla, another woman's daughter, but her daughter too. That's when I realized that there wasn't anything to understand.
"Sara and Catherine are just like any other couple- two people in love. They are just like any other parents, better than most- they love and cherish their children. So," she turned to us, "I just wanted to say I'm sorry. I'm sorry it took me so long, I'm sorry that I missed out on two years of my grandchildren's lives because of ignorance. And I wanted you to know, you both to know, that I love you and congratulations. You deserve every chance at happiness." She blew us a kiss.
For what felt like the millionth time that day, my eyes misted over. "Thank you," I mouthed. She nodded and returned to her seat beside Sam. He immediately took her hand and I felt a vein twitch in my forehead.
"Hey, Sar!" Denny had a big shit-eating grin on his face. "Can I give a speech?"
"Yeah, Bird, what about me?" Joey want to know, cracking his knuckles to try and be intimidating.
It worked, Sara's eyes went wide. It was so comic, I couldn't help but laugh out loud. She stood up and pointed at both of them. "No way in Hell!"
"How about a toast then?"
"Yeah, at least a toast."
I tugged on her pant leg. "Let them have their fun, babe. I've already married you, and nobody else really matters, right?"
She rolled her eyes and sagged her shoulders reluctantly. "Fine. But make it quick."
"Alright!" Denny and Joey stood, raising their glasses.
"To Catherine!" Denny began loudly.
"May she always leave her handcuffs at work!" Sara went bright red and covered her eyes.
"May she guard the tequila like a fierce Mongol warrior!"
"May she never come to her senses-"
"Or start a polygamous cult!"
Joey lost his composure for a second and guffawed. "May she always win out over Sara's stash…of forensics magazines."
"May she never find out about that time when Sara posed for the cover of San Francisco Magazine."
"Shit!" Sara muttered beside me and dropped her head to the table.
"And may she never go a day without knowing that she's the luckiest woman in the world!"
"Hallelujah! Praise the Lord! And Amen!" Thank emptied their glasses, and the highly amused audience, including myself, followed suit.
"San Francisco Magazine, huh?"
Sara held up a hand. "I do not want to talk about it."
"Well, I think that's it for the speeches, or at least, I hope it is. God, how long have we been sitting here? And when are they going to start playing some music we can dance to?"
Sara looked up and smiled. "How about right now?" She got up and quickly walked over to the band, whispering something into the leader's ear. He nodded and smiled. Then Sara was back, and extending her hand to me. "May I have this dance? Mo is going to watch the twins."
I nodded and placed my smaller hand in hers. As she led me out onto the dance floor, the whole hall went quiet. Sara nodded towards the band, and a familiar tune began to play. I was surprised because it was a fairly fast song which required us to actually dance, and I knew Sara was shy about that sort of thing. But apparently not. My jaw dropped as she pushed me away and then twirled me back in. She winked.
Well, now, it takes more than a robin to make the winter go
And it takes two lips of fire to melt away the snow
Well, it takes two hearts a-cookin' to make a fire grow
Sara mouthed the words.
And baby, you've got what it takes!
I was in shock, Sara was whirling and twirling me all over the dance floor like a pro. Her foot work was dead on, and she was magically keeping tempo. But by the start of the second verse, I pulled myself together. I flashed her a bright smile and then kept pace with her, curling my leg around her ass as she dipped me.
You know it takes a lot of kissin'- Tell me about it.
to make a romance sweet
Ooh, it takes a lot of lovin' to make my life complete
We mouthed the words together this time, looking into each other's eyes.
Mmm, and it takes a lot of woman to knock me off my feet
and baby- you've got what it takes!
I said, mm, mm, mm. uh-huh, mm, mm, mm
Ah, ah, hah mm, mm
You know you've got just what it takes!
The music continued to play, but I just had to know.
"Sara?" I questioned as I twisted away.
"Mmm?" She stepped to my right and took my hand.
"Where'd you learn to dance like this?"
"The boys," she said, breathing a little heavy.
"Our boys?" I asked, disbelieving. I walked around her in a circle.
"Yeah." She pulled me close, her arms around my waist. "Grissom let us sneak off for two hours a few days a week for the last month or so. I wanted to surprise you and be able to dance at our wedding, so I needed to take lessons. But I didn't want to go by myself, so the guys all took turns going with me and being my partner. They were kind enough to let me learn to lead." She smiled widely. "Surprised?"
I shook my head, "Impressed. You learned to dance like this in a month? And a third of the time you had Greg as a partner? You're my hero."
She laughed, pushing me away again. "Well you know, Cath, dance is a very interesting science. Mathematically speaking, the kinetics involved in conjunction with the rhythm and beat of the-"
"I don't need to know how you justify it in your brain, sweetheart. I'm just touched that you learned for me."
"Of course. I had fun doing it too."
The song ended and another started up. Other couples started to make their way onto the floor. We just kept dancing. I don't know for how long. At the end of the first slow song, Greg came over and tapped my shoulder. "May I cut in?"
I graciously handed Sara over to him. I wasn't alone very long. I felt Warrick wrap his hand around my waist, "Care to dance?"
I smiled and nodded. We easily picked up the rhythm. Warrick is a great dancer.
"So what do you think of Diana? My date?"
"I really haven't gotten to talk to her much. She's young. She's certainly beautiful."
"She's a social worker. I know she's only twenty-six, but there's something about her. She's mature, she's smart, she's sexy as hell- and she thinks my jokes are funny. Plus she's not weirded out about what I do, she understands having to work tough hours. She's amazing."
"How long have you been dating?"
"Five weeks. But it's serious. She wasn't at all freaked out when I invited her to a wedding. Man, she's just unbelievable. I think I'm in love with her, Cath."
I smiled up at him, "Congratulations, War. That's just so great." I let him go. "So, why don't you go dance with your date, and I'll see if I can't steal mine back from Greg." I kissed his cheek.
"Deal."
But before I could cross the dance floor to retrieve Sara, I was intercepted. By Sam. He encircled my waist. "One dance for an old man? You know you've always been my favorite girl."
"I thought that was my mother," I said dryly. I put my right hand in his, and placed my left on his shoulder.
"Ah, Hell, Mugs, don't be like that. You know I love your mother. But she's a mature woman."
"And what am I, at forty-two years old?"
"Is that how old you are? Jesus, that must make me…seventy. I don't like the sound of that. How about you be thirty-five, that way I'm only sixty-three."
I shook my head.
"So who was that old man who walked you down the aisle, and why wasn't it me? You're the closest thing I have to a daughter."
"What about Nancy? Why am I always the one you come to? You know what, don't even tell me. I sure there's nothing paternal about it."
"Oh, I don't know, Mugs. You've just something a little extra about you. Now, who is that man?"
"Sam," I sighed exasperatedly. "His name is Larry Lester, he's a very dear friend of both Sara's and mine. And I didn't ask you, because while you are a close…family friend, we haven't spoken in a long time and I didn't know what kind of condition your relationship with my mother was in. Though, now I see it seems to be perfectly fine. Larry offered. I accepted. End of story."
I heard coughing behind Sam and he pulled away so that could see Sara standing there. "Excuse me, Mr. Braun, but I believe you have my wife."
"I believe you're right about that. We haven't met yet, Ms. Sidle, I'm-"
"Mrs. Sidle-Willows. And I know who you are. I would love to stay and chat some, but it appears that we are going to cut the cake in a very short amount of time. I just came to get Catherine. I'm sure there will be more time later." She took my hand. "Excuse us."
When we were a safe distance away, I rested my head on her shoulder. "Thank you so, so much."
"You looked like you could use some rescuing. And besides, what are wives for?"
Wives! Ha. Sara and I were married! "C'mon, Mrs. Sidle-Willows, let's round up the kids, I think the cutting of the cake is something they won't want to miss."
IOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOIOI
We cut the cake, we ate it, we took tons of pictures, we danced some more, and then…we went home. We got in the limousine with the kids one last time, and we drove home. Gil had been kind enough to give us the before the wedding and the night after off, even though technically we were out of vacation days until the end of the century.
We thought about getting a hotel room, and spending the night alone, but we didn't want to. It was too much of a fuss, neither of us are particularly fond of hotel rooms, and the truth was, that after a whole long emotionally taxing day, we just wanted to be home with our kids. So we all put on our pajamas and dragged the mattress and sofa cushions onto the floor and stayed up late watching the original Dr. Dolittle and eating pretzels.
At some point, Sara got up to go check her email, taking Lizzie with her. When all three girls were dead to the world, I swung Mattie onto my hip and went upstairs.
"Babe?" I asked, poking my head into our room.
"Shh." On the bed was a passed out little body, Sara was rubbing her back. "Poor little Firecracker had the hiccups. Really bad. I just got her down."
"Is that what kept you from coming back down?"
"Part of it."
"What was the other part?"
"Well…I have this friend John. He used to be my supervisor when I worked in San Francisco? I hadn't spoken to him in a while so emailed him to tell him about the wedding and to see what's up.
"And?"
She turned the computer around and I sat on the edge of the bed. "Read it. Ignore the sex bit, but read the rest."
I adjusted the screen and read.
Hey, hey Sara! Why if it isn't my star CSI. It's been a long time. Congratulations, I'm glad to hear about your marriage, even more excited to know your bride is none other than Catherine Willows. I read her one of her articles in the journal on measuring high velocity blood spatter on absorbent surfaces. I was blown away. Bet she's a real tiger in the sack, eh? Never mind, I don't want to know…really.
I was actually thinking about looking you up just the other day. I have a proposition for you. As you know, I am getting up there in years, and I am taking an administrative position as of the end of this year. Now, here's where it gets exciting; due to a major federal grant, we are expanding the entire crime scene unit and adding in more than twenty new positions including one for a new supervisor on every shift. We'll be responsible for every crime scene from Marin to Santa Cruz and as far west as San Joaquin.
There will be two teams on each shift, each team requiring a different supervisor. If you include my position, that means there will be four supervisor positions available within the next year, including two on the night shift. What do you say? I know you and the Mrs. are both more than qualified for it. It would be no problem for me slip in a good word with the hiring committee- I'm the chair.
How would it be to be back in San Francisco? Just something to think about. I know it's more expensive to live here but the schools are better, and it's not like you have any shortage of friends around. How great would working together as supervisors be for you two newlyweds? Think about it, talk to Catherine, take your time- no rush. Let me know. Whatever you decide, it was great to hear from you.
Stay safe, John
When I looked up, Sara was watching me from the other side of the bed. "So?" she asked, tentatively. Her expression was impossible to read.
"So…"
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So…I really wanted this to be an easy fifteen page 'I love you, you love me' kind of wedding. Didn't workout that way. This is officially my longest post of all time. And I introduced new storylines with Sam and Warrick, not to mention the whole moving to California question. Sorry if it seemed to drag on; I couldn't decide which parts to get rid of to make it shorter.
Now, since this is the longest post ever and a lovely romantic chapter, and I managed to get it to you in under a week, you know what I think? I think you guys owe me some serious reviewage. That's my new word. Reviewage.
I like it.
And I'm not talking some dinky ten, twenty reviews. I want at least thirty, Goddammit! Or the next post don't come fo a month! That's right! You never thought I'd stoop so low! But I have! I am holding the chapter HOSTAGE!
And it's a really good one, too. Lots of fluff, lots of stuff involving the kids and the boys, a little drama, new characters, a dash of action…yep. Once I write this update, it's going to be the best ever. How's that for incentive?