Meredith opens her eyes, only to be surrounded by the darkness. The thick covers and the central heating are protecting her from the biting cold that she has grown so used to. She isn't sure why she is awake. She doesn't feel the need to vomit like she has the other times she has been yanked from her blissful return to her endless summer nights in the arms of Derek.
She turns and looks out of the window and sees the large snow flakes slowly descending to the earth that is already clothed in a layer of white. Everything in the outside world looks so pure and smells so clean, but she sees it as desolate. She sees it as dead. She sees it as suffocating.
She used to love the snow. She used to love going outside by herself and plopping down on her back as she extended her arms and legs before moving them back and forth in her attempt to make the perfect snow angel. Her nanny would stand at the door and watch her. Her nanny would make her a hot cup of coca after she came inside. Her nanny would tuck her in to bed snug as a bug to keep her from getting cold.
She gasps as a sudden sharp pain travels from her back to her abdomen. It is a tightening sensation and a pain unlike any she has ever felt. She clamps her hand down over her mouth, fear taking hold of her. She doesn't want to wake up the Shepherds. She doesn't want to be a burden, but she knows that she needs to get to the hospital. Maybe she can call a cab.
She throws the covers off of her body and swings her legs over the side of the bed, praying that her son is okay. Needing for [itheir[/i son to be okay.
She plants her socked feet firmly on the cold ground before forcing herself off of the bed. Even though she has only suffered the intense pain once, her legs are already weak and begin to shake violently under her weight. She places her hand on the bedside table to support her weight. She inhales deeply as he tries to force herself to move. She needs to get downstairs. She needs to get to the hospital. She can't wake up the Shepherds.
She slowly begins to make her way around the large room, walking next to the wall so that she is able to support herself. She makes it half way to the door when she feels another sharp pain. She covers her mouth with her hand as it rips through her abdomen, stifling the whimper that escapes as her frail frame shakes as the earthquakes ripple through her body. She leans her forehead against the wall as she waits for the pain to subside. Fear now holds an even tighter grip on her as the pain has increased in both intensity and in time.
She remains leaning against the wall even after the pain has subsided, tears trailing down her cheeks. She is alone. She is all alone. The Shepherds may be in the next room, but her lover her is lost like Waldo in one of those damn "Where's Waldo?" books. Except he can't be found on every page, but only once throughout the entire book that consists of thousands of pages.
Her breathing is somewhat labored as she pushes herself off of the wall some ten minutes later and continues her journey across the guest room. She finally reaches the door after what seems like forever. Her hands tremble violently as she turns the knob and walks out into the dark hallway of the strange house. She shuffles her feet as she crosses the hallway to the opposite wall, hoping to find support in their structure. She doesn't even think about how she is going to get down the stairs, all that she knows is that she has to.
She takes a few steps and is right in front of the Shepherd's door when another pain shoots through her body, this one even worse than before. Her knees give out under the strain of the pain and she can no longer stifle her cries as she meets the floor on her hands and knees. One hand immediately finds her cramping stomach while the other supports her upper body weight. She sobs violently as the pain continues to ripple like crashing waves.
Her chin is tucked down into her chest, so she does not see it when the door next to her is opened quickly. Her own sobs and the throbbing of the blood vessels in her head occupy her hearing, so she doesn't hear the stunned gasp or the shuffling feet of the room's previous occupants. She doesn't become aware of their presence until she feels a comforting hand on her back.
"Meredith? What's wrong?" the soft, feminine voice asks, still raspy from the disuse associated with sleep.
Meredith gasps as she tries to find sufficient oxygen to answer Mrs. Shepherd's worried breath.
"My baby!" she gasps "Oh God! My baby!!"
Meredith begins to sob as the exhaustion from the flu, the pain, and pregnancy in general causes her body to ache.
Mrs. Shepherd runs her hand up and down Meredith's back as she turns to her husband.
"Call Derek and let him know that we are coming to the hospital."
Dr. Shepherd simply nods his head as he runs his hand through his messy hair before following his wife's instructions. Mrs. Shepherd remains kneeling on the floor next to Meredith as her husband places a call to their son. She rubs Meredith's back and whispers comforting words into her ear as Meredith tries to recover.
"Can you describe the pain?" Mrs. Shepherd asks with worry in her voice.
"It starts in my back and then moves towards my stomach. It's a tightening feeling. Oh God! Is my baby okay?!" Meredith asks in a panicked voice as she finally raises her tear-streaked face to Mrs. Shepherd's.
Mrs. Shepherd smiles weakly at Meredith.
"I believe that you are having Braxton-Hicks contractions, but I can't be sure until we have a monitor on you. So, we are going to take you to the hospital and I will take care of you. Everything will be fine, Meredith. I'm here. I will take care very good care of you and your son."
Mrs. Shepherd's words touch Meredith. No one has ever wanted to take care of her just to take care of her. No one besides Derek. Her nannies were paid. Her mother was never around. It's Greek to her. It's new. It's new but she can't help but find comfort in it.
The only thing she can do is nod her head as Mrs. Shepherd helps her to her feet. Dr. Shepherd exits their bedroom at this time, already clothed.
"I called Derek. He will be waiting for us. You go get dressed and I will help Meredith to the car," Dr. Shepherd says as he looks worriedly at Meredith who is slouched against his wife.
Mrs. Shepherd nods as she maneuvers so that Meredith is now leaning against her husband. Meredith is tired. Meredith is so tired. Tired from the physical pain. Tired from the emotional pain. So tired.
Dr. Shepherd wraps his arm around Meredith's shoulders as he guides her towards the stairs. Her head limply falls against his chest as her feet move by their own volition. All of her thoughts are focused on the tiny life growing inside of her. The tiny life that is currently in distress. The tiny life that is the only piece of him that she has left. The tiny life that she might lose. She might lose that tiny life and then she would be left with absolutely nothing.
She isn't sure when Dr. Shepherd picks her up. She isn't sure when they get into the car and begin to make their way to the hospital. She is sure that when they are about fifteen minutes away from the hospital another crippling contraction rips through her already breaking body, causing her to scream out in pain as she grasps for anything. She finds Mrs. Shepherd's hand, letting her know that she is not alone. She is not alone, but she is.
Once the contraction subsides, Meredith leans back against the seat of the car, tears streaming down her face, and looks out of the window. The snow is still falling heavily, covering the filth of the world in its purity. She leans her hot forehead against the cool glass of the window. Her hot breath causes the window to fog, but she doesn't care. The cool glass feels so good against her burning skin.
They pull up at the hospital, Dr. Shepherd parking close as he has a physicians parking permit. Mrs. Shepherd stands on one side of Meredith, while Dr. Shepherd stands on the other. They walk slowly into the hospital, Meredith feeling a slight twinge with each step.
The doors to the Emergency Department open and they walk in. Dr. Shepherd notices the person sitting behind the desk. The desk that will allow them to actually enter the Emergency Department from the waiting room.
"Jessica, will you open the door? They know we are coming."
Jessica looks at Dr. Shepherd skeptically, but decides not to question him as he is a neurosurgeon at the hospital. She presses the button that causes the doors to automatically open. They walk slowly through the doors, supporting almost all of Meredith's light weight.
"What the hell are you doing here you little whore?" a harsh voice asks harshly.
Meredith looks up and meets the cold eyes of her mother. Another contraction begins to rip through her body. A young doctor standing next to Meredith's mom hears her comment and turns to see who she is talking to, and just as Meredith begins to cry out in pain, green once again meets blue.
So, you guys are now all caught up. I was going to wait until this weekend to post this chapter, but decided to go ahead and post it now. I also would like to invite you all to join a new board that I just co-created. We would love to have you all. The link is in my profile, but if that doesn't work, don't hesitate to send me a message and I will be more than happy to give you my yahoo, aol, or msn so that I can send it to you. Hope you enjoyed the update. Let me know what you think.
-Marci