Author's Note:
I am very sorry, but this is a short chapter. I will be updating tomorrow and over the weekend. I will try to update both this and "Shadow of the Day."
I want to thank-you everyone for the number of hits and alerts I have received for this story. They have blown my mind. I would love it, if you would review too. I know that it is a pain. But, I would love just to here any thoughts or feelings whatsoever. Just to let you know, though, that even though I love to write for an audience and hear feedback, I write a lot for my love of literature and just the ability to write stories. So, I will never be the type of person who will not update till they get X number of reviews. No offense if you do that, but that is personally a huge pet peeve of mine. With that said, I would still love all the reviews you are willing to give. Love it, hate it, please let me know.
Music: This is a little complicated. I divided the chapter in some regards when I was planning this point of the story. So, the music that is supposed to go with it, doesn't fit. However, when I was writing this story, I listened to a certain song. And, the thoughts do reflect another song. Let me know, if you think they relate.
Here are the songs:
"Beauty from Pain" by Superchick (Reflects some of the imagines in the chapter)
"The Long Day" by Norah Jones (this is the song I listened to when I wrote this)
Throughout the past two years after I met Edward, I found myself on the edge of death numerous times. From Phoenix to Italy, my life was always being risked. And every time, I felt comfortably at ease about this idea of dying. For in my mind, I was not dying for myself; I was risking death, because without my family, without my friends, with Edward, there would be no point in living. What is life worth without love? Life, without the joy of spending time with Edward, was meaningless. A fire would never be able to survive without a spark; it would surely get suffocated. How is life any different?
Yet, this moment, at this time as I lay chained to the bed, bond, and silenced, everything was different. I would not die trying to protect my family or die in attempt to see Edward one last time. I would probably die due to being the victim of a human's game. When did the supposed monsters, according to Edward, become my saviors and the innocents become the monsters? I gladly offered myself up to die at the expense of a vampire's game before…
As much as I tried to remain calm after I heard John deliver the speech to the men, I could not help but thinking about the odds of the situation. At any point, at any time, I could perish. But, wasn't that the same as everyday life? At any point in a day, something can happen that causes a death. A bus accident, illness, a deadly fall, a vampire attack…
The problem with trying to push out certain thoughts is the necessity of having other thoughts to replace them with. When I tried to push out the thoughts of death and being trapped here, I thought of the best thing in my life…Edward. And as I thought of Edward, the pain collapsed around me. He was the biggest thing I lost by dying. I was losing my wedding, my best friends, my life… And even as I tried to push those thoughts, I found my mind tied to an endless loop that never failed to replay over and over again, crashing my hope to pieces. With every loop, another tide of pain flooded through my empty body. People might ridicule me if they found out my thoughts. "How could you give up hope so quickly," they would probably ask. And, if I was one of those innocent, unharmed bystanders, I would to be dumbstruck by my lack of conviction and strength. But, how much can one person try to assemble? Every person, every single person has a breaking point. Is the prospect of being raped by probably seven men, tortured, and then killed enough?
Every since the men disassembled about two hours ago, the tides of pain and misery continued to collapse upon my lifeless body. I was going to lose everything tomorrow… I was already losing everything. And to my surprise, as the minutes droned on, I realized that the men were beginning to gain something from me that I never thought I would give… my spirit. My faith in Edward and his family finding me was fading. If they were going to find me, then they might have by now. It only took hours for Edward to find me in Phoenix. They were not going to save me this…
Each second caused the pain that first sourced in my stomach to leek throughout my body. It was a numbing, dulling pain that instead of firing my cells was slowly sucking the life from my marrow. Even if Edward found me tomorrow, would he even want me, would he want the lifeless tomb that would be left then? I was not sure if I would be able to be me if they did what they were planning to do.
I would be spoiled in so many ways. Edward and I were planning on sharing this new experience together as lovers, not bound to a bed in pain. He was going to complete me in so many ways. But, what was I even thinking about that? I would die. In one way or another…
The hours passed. They passed too quickly in mind. Yet, isn't that how it always works? As the little boy who squeezes the falling sand in his hand, as I tried to hold upon to my last few hours of peace, I was causing it to spill ever so faster.
There were no clocks on the walls. Yet, after some careful movements I was able to slide the watch that was still on my wrist into my view. It was currently 4:32am. As much as I hated the thought, my eye lids began to droop more and more till finally my mind was at peace when sleep overcame me.
"Jake, what are you doing here?" I asked Jake as he stood near a tree outside the church where our wedding was being held. The wedding was scheduled to begin in less than an hour. We just finished some last minute pictures, thanks to Alice. I was still prohibited from seeing Edward.
"Bells, this is your wedding. I am your best friend, right?" Jake questioned me, seeing to be my old Jake. "Edward sent me an invitation." Edward sent him an invitation. When? Why? At least, Jake doesn't seem too angry, and he called him Edward. He called him Edward! That has to be progress.
"Thank you for coming."
"I had to talk to you before the wedding."
"Oh." A storm of thoughts erupted in my head. Was he still trying to break up the wedding? Was he going to ruin my special day? How could he do this to me?
"Bella, relax." He obviously noticed my previous frozen stance. "I came here to just wish you well. I will always love you, Bella. But, I know that I will imprint one day on a girl, and she will all my wishes come true. You and Edward deserve each other. There is no way I can compete with that love, and I do not want to anymore. You deserve it. You deserve to be able to love peacefully." Jake finished with a small smile on his lips. My eyes began to water with tears. The fighting was over, and I could not be as happy.
"Oh, thank you Jake. Thank you so much." I whispered as I threw my arms around Jake.
"You should not have done that."
"Why not?"
"You do not want to smell like 'mutt' for your wedding. I do not think that Edward would like that too much. Also, Bells, as much as I hate to think about it. If…um… he changes you, I will understand, and we will not attack you or his family." I was no longer able to keep my tears under control. I hugged him again, not even thinking about the smell. He was giving me everything that I needed for my happy ending to come true…
That was true, until I woke up.
A/N: Not my best, but it is an interlude chapter. Some thoughts and feelings were explored. Next chapter will have so much action you might need to look away at times. Please, review. Cheers!