Edward's POV

It started out like any other day. Bella came over after wasting the night away sleeping (low energy, PSH!). Emmett and his "homies" threw together a stupid plan to annoy me. Jasper is continuously interrupting his gayness to yell at Emmett. Alice is dancing around with a fashion magazine jabbering about the mall and shopping. Rosalie is glued to the mirror (well, literally, that was Emmett's fault). Esme is cleaning every inch of the house when she isn't sneaking in to play the Xbox. And Carlisle is stowed away in his PERFECT office. But something about today was going to be different. I'm not sure if Jasper is playing with my emotions, or I'm having an Alice premonition moment, or what. But I'm sure of it.

"Edwaaarrrd!" Bella sang from downstairs.

"Yes Bella?"

"Can you come help me with something?"

"Sure" I say and speed down to her wit h curiosities burning inside me…you know, life would be so much easier if I could just read her mind!! "What do you need help with?"

"Well, I'm getting back at Emmett for using my bras as sling-shots to hit Jasper with pears. I have created a revenge plan, but I need help."

Jasper speeds down the stairs. "Do I sense revenge against Emmett?"

"Yup" Bella and I replied together.

"Then I'm in, as long as it doesn't involve pears," Jasper winces, "those evil EVIL pears!!" We lean in to listen to Bella's marvelous plan.

-2 hours and a well devised plan later-

"He should be home any minute now" Bella laughed evilly as she stared around at our work.

"This is going to be HILARIOUS! I'll gather the family. They won't want to miss this!" I darted off and collected everyone else, including Rosalie who I had to pry from the very sticky mirror. She complained about her ruined complexion. PSH! Girls.

We were all sitting and waiting, when suddenly we heard a car pull up. In fact, I think I heard two cars!

"I'm ho-"Emmett began to call as he burst in the door, but he stopped short when he saw what we had done.

"N-n-n-n-n-no!! Y-y-you didn't!! I-i-i-it's t-t-the CARDBOARD BOXES!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

Emmett's POV

I charged upstairs, away from the living room which was covered in cardboard boxes. Worst of all was the HUGE box ready for me to walk into it.

Not this time Evil Cardboard Box Demons! Not ever! You shall never catch the Emmenator!!

I sighed in relief as I opened the door into my room, my sanctuary, my safety net, my-

"Nooooo! Not here! Not this! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!! I ran from my room screeching like a little girl who's just seen a spider.

Bella's POV

Emmett came crashing and screaming down the stairs. "How could you?" he snarled.

Wow, Emmett's angry! That's unusual. I thought with a smug smile on my face. I crossed my arms across my chest, "Well it's what you deserve for using my undergarments as toys"

Esme and Carlisle gazed at Emmett in shock. Ha, I thought, He's going to get it now!

Emmett turned innocent and began to whimper "B-b-b-but you filled my room with water and r-r-r-rubber d-d-duckies. You know that they are my greatest fear, other than cardboard boxes"

"Yes Emmett, I know, and I'm sorry, but you needed to learn a lesson" I suddenly felt guilty for hurting him. "I promise to have it all cleaned up as soon as possible"



Edward's POV

I had been enjoying this little scene with a very distressed and upset Emmett, until Bella promised to clean everything up. Awwwww man! And he was REALLY freaked out too!!

Bella gestured for me to help her clean up along with Alice, Jasper, Esme, and Carlisle. Rosalie was escorting a trembling, thumb-sucking, whimpering Emmett slowly up the stairs. It was funny to read his thoughts…

No more cardboard! No more wa-wa (water)! No more ducky! Oh, WAIT! What if they all team up?! The water could jump inside the cardboard box of doom. And then the rubber ducky would hop in the water and float there with those menacing eyes! Those EVIL menacing eyes! Oh! And the Quack-quack! NOOOO! Not the Quack-quack! AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

I stopped reading Emmett's thoughts because something else came to my attention that I had not noticed before. Someone else's thoughts were mixed in with my families. And a breeze blew a new smell in from the still open door.

A human! (other than Bella) And there, standing in the doorway was the thing I had overlooked. I guess I hadn't noticed at first when Emmett's HUGE, hulking body hauled through the door. And in all the excitement I hadn't sensed the new thoughts and smell. How strange.

Bella's POV

"…Edward? EDWARD?! Would you snap out of it?! Did you even hear a word I said?! EDWARD?! WHAT ARE YOU STARE-OH!!" I gasped when I saw that we were not alone.

Standing in full-view of all the Cullens (except Emmett and Rosalie who were probably off cuddling somewhere. GAG!! Cuddling is only cute when Edward and I do it! ) was a young girl of about thirteen. She stood slumped over with her mouth wide open, gawking at what lay out before her.

"Uh-oh…" Jasper murmured behind me.

"This can't be good" Alice added, slipping under Jasper's arm.

"Kids…" Carlisle commanded "…go upstairs and stay there. Except Edward, you stay here"



As Alice, Jasper, and I slowly headed upstairs the girl snapped out of her weird trance.

"OME!! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! FTLOE!! IS IT REALLY YOU?" she squealed as she darted inside and started sniffing.

Edward's POV

I stared in awe as the girl sniffed around the room. "Excuse me? What did you say? Was that slang?"

"Oh sorry," the girl blushed "OME means 'Oh My Edward', and FTLOE means 'For The Love Of Edward'" Her face grew a brighter red. "Edward being you of course. Me and my friends, we LOVE you!!"

I glanced at Carlisle to see his reaction because for some reason he was blocking his thoughts. Him…and ALICE! That's strange. Maybe Alice saw something and told Carlisle, but they don't want to tell me. Hmmmmmmmmmm….

Just as our visitor seemed to be getting calm, something WEIRD happened.

"Edward, I LOVE YOU!!" She was screaming and bouncing around. Then she jumped on my back and continued screeching, "I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you!!"

"Ok, seriously….who are you?" I almost growled, and instantly regretted it when her expression turned to that of hurt and all of her excitement ceased. "Ummm…I'm sor-" But I was cut off.

"I'm Samantha! Or Sammy! Or Sam! Or Sammy C!! AND I LOVE YOOOUUU!!" she blurted in a big flurry of words as she returned to her bouncy, flouncy self.

"I see…Bella!"

The fan girl continued with her weirdness, "Oh! I love Bella like a sister! She is SOOOOO nice! And SOOOOO swee-OWWW!!" Bella slapped her.

Samantha smiled, "Awwwwwww, thanks! You know, Edward was always right in picking you."



Bella softened up a bit and ended her raging fury. But seeing as the fan girl was still bouncing on my back, she became worried.

"Ummm, Edward…..?" (A/N: OME! I JUST NOTICED THAT BELLA'S INTITALS ARE "BS"!! GET IT? HAHAHAHAHAHA!!)

"Bella…this FREAKO just started jumping all over me…" I answered her un-asked question.

Sammy C gasped, "HE CALLED ME A FREAKO!! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" And she ran out of the house screaming, after running into a wall first.

I stood there, dazed. Behind me I could hear Emmett and Jasper snickering and Alice whispering "I told you so" to Carlisle.

"I knew something strange was going to happen today! Oh well, just another bizarre, spazming fan girl" I whispered under my breath.

"Freako AND Bizarre, Spazming Fan girl?! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!! I'M ON A ROLL!!

Written by Sammy C, another Jempwarth member ! :D