A/N: I apologize again for the delay in updating...I just moved, so things have been a little crazy. I hope to be able to update more regularly soon. Thanks so much for all of the reviews, I always love hearing what everyone thinks. I can see that not everyone completely agrees with the Dawn/Connor breakup...hopefully this chapter will please almost everyone :) Enjoy, and as always, please review!

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Chapter 16: Second Chances

Dawn didn't sleep very well that night. A thousand thoughts kept running through her mind, and she felt as if a war was raging inside of her. Her mind was wondering why she had agreed to meet him after he had broken her heart. Maybe she deserved better. But her heart was counting the seconds until six thirty. She admitted that she missed him. She really did. She missed the way he would stroke her hair and hold her close, the way he would kiss her. She missed the way he would look into her eyes and make her feel as if she were the only girl in the world. And she missed the way her heart would feel when he told her that he loved her and she knew he meant every word.

Besides the love and the feeling of contentment, Dawn also had to admit that there were much more shallow things she missed. She missed making love with him, and she was beginning to feel the withdrawal in the deepest parts of her body. True, she had been a virgin until only a few months before, but since that blissful night before the final battle in Sunnydale they had made a habit of making love, well, a lot, considering the circumstances. And now she was left with a feeling of dissatisfaction that she knew only he could truly fix.

Stop it, she scolded herself. After everything that happened, the sex is not a good enough reason to take him back. No matter how good it was. No, she knew this was about trust. Her faith in him had been shattered, and that needed to be rebuilt before they could ever get back to where they had been. When it was all said and done their breakup hadn't been about Kerri, it hadn't been about a stupid kiss. It had been about secrets and betrayal.

She didn't really know what to expect when she met him tonight. Without speaking the exact words, he had made it clear on the phone that he wanted to see her to try and win her back. And she had jumped at the opportunity much quicker than she would have thought. Maybe she hadn't realized until that moment just how much she had truly missed him. And she could hear without question in his voice that he missed her, too.

As she slowly rose from bed after lying awake for over an hour, she thought of how long it had taken them to get to where they had been. It had been ten months ago that they had first met, during her trip to Los Angeles that had turned out to be everything but what she had expected. During that time they had fallen in love, he had moved to Sunnydale to be with her, they had made love, they had fought side by side, and they had moved again. All of that had been near-destroyed, and she knew it wouldn't be easy getting that back.

But if we could get through this...that would mean we could survive just about anything.

She dismissed the thought, and vowed to herself to let Connor do most of the talking when they met. All she could do was listen to what he had to say, and decide whether or not to accept him back into her life.

Back into her heart.

She slowly walked out into the living room, where she saw Buffy and Faith sitting at the counter, drinking coffee and perusing the morning paper. They both looked up when they saw her. "Dawnie! Hey. Did you have fun last night?"

It took her a minute to realize what her sister meant. Being at that club with Gina and Amelia seemed like centuries ago now. "Oh, yeah. It was nice." She moved to the cabinet and removed a box of cereal and a bowl, losing herself in the mindless ritual.

"Well, I am totally free today. No work, no nothing. So I was hoping we could have a girl's day. Maybe go into the city, hit some shops, eat out. Maybe even catch a movie later. What do you say?" her sister said enthusiastically.

Dawn froze. "Um, yeah, that sounds good. But unfortunately I'm not free all day. I'm meeting Amelia for dinner tonight."

Looking back on it later, Dawn wasn't exactly sure why she lied. The words were out of her mouth before she could even think. For some reason her gut had told her that it was best if she kept her meeting with Connor just between the two of them. She knew that Buffy was very mad at Connor for what he had done, and she probably wouldn't approve of her attempting reconciliation, if that was even what it was. And the things she was feeling were just too complex and confusing for her to explain. But even though she had good reasons for concealing the truth, she still felt extremely guilty when she saw the disappointed expression on her sister's face.

"Oh, okay. Do you think you could reschedule? I really don't get many days off, and I was really hoping we could spend today together. Us, and Faith, of course, if she wants to come," Buffy added.

"Nah, it's okay. You guys do your girly thing, I can amuse myself," Faith said. Dawn noticed that the brunette slayer was watching her intently, and she felt herself blush a little.

"I'm sorry Buffy, but I really can't cancel. Amelia and I made these plans a long time ago, and she's been such a great friend, I really don't want to disappoint her." Once the lie was out, it seemed to grow on its own. "But I'll tell you what. We can go shopping, maybe grab some lunch, I just need to be back here before dinner time."

Buffy appeared to be satisfied with that. "Okay, sounds good." She smiled warmly at her, and Dawn smiled back, feeling very guilty for lying. It's for the best. She'd only try to stop me from going. She quickly poured her cereal, taking a second to glance up at Faith, relieved to see that she seemed focused on her newspaper. She finished her breakfast quickly, then excused herself to go get ready.

Half an hour later, Buffy and Dawn were heading out the door. Halfway down the stairs Dawn realized she had forgotten her wallet, so she sent her sister ahead while she ran up to get it. Faith answered the door. "I just need to grab my wallet," Dawn explained, hurrying into her bedroom to grab it. After fetching it, she emerged from her bedroom, pausing a moment to stick it into her purse.

"You're not meeting Amelia tonight, are you?" Faith said suddenly.

Dawn nearly dropped her purse in surprise. Her lips parted slightly as she started to deny the claim, but she decided against it. "How did you know?" she asked, guilt turning her cheeks pink.

"You're a sucky liar," Faith said with a smirk.

Dawn shook her head. The two women's eyes met for a minute. "You're not going to tell Buffy, are you?"

"Nah. Your business is your business. And I know you have your reasons." Dawn was surprised to see Faith start to blush a little, as the slayer looked down at the floor. "You're lucky you have a second chance." Their eyes met again as she looked up, and yet again a wave of deep understanding seemed to pass between them.

Dawn smiled sadly at Faith, unsure of what to say. After a long moment she slowly moved out the door.

On her way down to the street to meet Buffy, she thought of how ironic it was that of all people, Faith understood her better than anyone right now.

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"I'm sorry I haven't been able to spend more time with you recently," Buffy said. They were sitting in a small outdoor café, a few shopping bags at their feet as they sipped cappuccinos and enjoyed the warm fall day.

"It's okay. I know you're busy. But this is nice. We should try to do this more often," Dawn said sincerely. The morning had been nice. She and Buffy had each gotten some new clothes, and it had been genuinely nice to spend time with her sister. She was even pretty sure there had been a minute or two where she had thought of something other than her meeting with Connor tonight.

"We should," Buffy said. She smiled and looked around at the semi-busy street, filled with Saturday shoppers. "I like it here. In Rome. It took me a while to adjust, but now I think I like it."

"I do too," Dawn agreed. "There's something charming about it." She took another sip of her drink.

Buffy's face suddenly grew serious. "How are you, Dawnie? Really."

Let's see, I broke up with the love of my life a week ago after he cheated on me, I went back to school and stared down Kerri, I went out last night and got semi-drunk and almost picked up by a guy in a bar, and tonight I'm sneaking off to secretly meet my ex for some reason that I don't even completely understand. "I'm dealing," she said, not bothering to elaborate.

"I know how you feel," Buffy said sympathetically. She paused a second, staring into her cappuccino. "You know I've been there. When Angel and I...I didn't think I was ever going to be happy again. But eventually I moved on. We both did."

"But you still love him," Dawn stated carefully.

Sadness crossed Buffy's eyes. "Yes. I think a part of me will always love him. But the point is, for a while it will seem like your world is over. But it's not."

"But you haven't been that happy since you were with Angel," Dawn blurted out. "I mean, sure, you tried to move on with Riley, but you didn't really love him. At least not the way you loved Angel. And then there was Spike and I believe that you loved him in your own way, but it still wasn't the same." She felt her voice rising a little as she continued on. "So no, I don't think that's true. I don't think you can ever really move on from losing your first love."

Buffy looked stung as she regarded Dawn as if she were seeing her for the first time. "Dawnie..."

Dawn closed her eyes for a second and tried to calm the pounding of her heart. "I'm sorry. That was rude. I'm just..."

She was surprised when her sister reached across the table to touch her hand. "I know. We don't have to talk about it anymore if you don't want to."

Dawn nodded in relief. "I think I'd like that." Buffy slowly retracted her hand and there was a moment of awkward silence as the two sisters sat there.

"Well what do you say we hit some more shops?" Buffy said, rising from her chair. Dawn forced a smile and picked up her bags as Buffy left the tip on the table, and then the two of them continued down the street, a new kind of tension now present.

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Dawn made a frustrated noise as she tossed the final components of her wardrobe onto the reject pile on the bed. She ran her hands through her hair. She had no idea why simply picking an outfit to wear to the pizza place was causing her so much stress. But somehow, she was finding something wrong with everything she owned...

She stood up and began to go through the pile again, determined to find something suitable. Then she caught a glimpse of the clock out of the corner of her eye. "Crap," she whined. It was already six. Time to make a decision. She quickly pulled on a pair of comfortable jeans and a fitted blue top. As she looked in the mirror she remembered that Connor had once told her how she had looked beautiful in that top. She instinctively pulled it off again, replacing it with a red t-shirt. She added a simple necklace and slipped on her favorite sandals. "That will have to do," she decided. After playing with her hair for a few precious minutes, she finally just ran a brush through it. She grabbed her purse and headed out of her bedroom.

"Have fun," Buffy called to her from her spot on the couch. Faith was still out.

Dawn glanced at her guiltily, still feeling horrible about her lie. Her little outburst earlier about her sister's love life had only made her feel worse. "Buffy, I'm sorry about before. I was just upset, I shouldn't have said those things about you and Angel and everyone."

Buffy stood up and slowly started to walk over. "Apology accepted." She sighed. "Dawnie, believe me, I know that my history with love has been pretty much a disaster. Maybe I have no right to give you advice."

"But you do," Dawn insisted. "You're my sister. You were only trying to look out for me." She reached her arms out and they hugged. When they pulled back she was surprised to see wetness in Buffy's eyes.

"You're so grown up. Even with everything you're going through, you're still so strong," Buffy said proudly.

Giving in and meeting Connor after only a week isn't very strong, she thought to herself. But she forced a smile. "I'd better go," she said quietly.

"Of course. You don't want to keep Amelia waiting." The oldest Summers dabbed at her eyes, feeling a little silly. "Have fun."

"Thanks." Dawn squeezed her hand before turning and exiting the apartment.

The usually short walk to the pizza place seemed to go on forever. She felt as if every step were in slow motion. Dawn felt extremely unprepared for this. She had never even decided what her position on getting back together was. I'll just have to let him do the talking, she decided. As she took a deep breath and pushed open the door to the restaurant, Faith's words from earlier played over in her mind.

"You're lucky you have a second chance."

Once inside she looked around, her heart pounding in trepidation. At first glance, she didn't see him, and wondered for a horrible second if he had changed his mind. Then her eyes settled on a very familiar head covered with longish brown hair, sitting alone at a booth with his back to her. She stood there for a second, frozen. Finally, she worked up the nerve to go over, and she tried to seem confident as she approached him.

When he saw her appear next to the booth, he felt something triggered inside of him that he hadn't felt all week. It was almost as if he came alive again. "Hi," he managed to say.

She slid into the booth across from him. "Hey."

He couldn't help but stare at her. She looked so beautiful in a perfectly-fitted red t-shirt, her shiny hair hanging around her shoulders. As his eyes continued upward they met with hers, as they looked at each other for the first time since the breakup. "I'm so glad you came," Connor said, unable to mask his relief. Ever since their phone conversation he had flipped between excitement at the meeting and convincing himself that she probably wouldn't even show. But she's here. That has to mean something, he told himself.

Connor turned his head and raised a hand, and soon a waiter came over to take their order. Dawn watched as he ordered a cheese pizza and two sodas. She couldn't help but smile as she watched him fumble with the Italian words. She was still smiling when the waiter left and Connor turned his attention back to her. "What's so funny?" he said suspiciously, his heart melting at the sight of her beautiful smile.

"Nothing, just, I see you still haven't quite mastered the native language," she said, half-teasing.

"I guess I'm just not as natural at it as you," he said, pleased that they had settled into an almost normal rapport so quickly. After a second her smile faded, and she looked down at her hands. He got the impression that she was waiting for him to say something. Remnants of a speech he had rehearsed in James's mirror fluttered through his mind, but they slipped away as quickly as they had come. "Dawn...I don't really know where to start."

"Neither do I," she agreed, her voice quieter than usual. She focused on a loose thread on her denim purse as it sat on the table, and she ran her fingers over it, happy to avoid his eyes. The brief friendly moment they had just shared was gone, and the tension she had prepared for had returned.

"I've had a lot of time to think this past week," he began. "I screwed up. And I hate myself for it. Dawn, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you, and I'm sorry for not being honest with you when I should have. You've never given me any reason to not trust you." His words seemed to hit home, as her fingers and eyes fell from her bag and settled once more on his gaze. "I was really stupid, and I deserved this miserable week." He paused. "But I would never be able to forgive myself if things were over between us for good." He gained momentum and confidence as his little speech wore on. "Dawn, what we have is too strong to be killed by one stupid mistake. I love you. My life is nothing without you. I've been learning that the hard way." He tried to notice if his words seemed to be having any effect, but Dawn was unreadable. However, he could tell that she was listening. "Now I understand that I can't just wave a magic wand and have everything be back to the way it was. I know that rebuilding what we had is going to take work, but I am more than willing."

There was a long silence as she attempted to process what had just been said. Finally her lips parted as if to speak, but just then the waiter arrived with their pizza and drinks. Dawn reached out and took a piece of pizza, biting into it even though her stomach was the last thing on her mind right now. Connor put a slice on his plate, but didn't touch it. He was staring at her expectantly. "I think it's your turn to say something now," he said nervously.

She took her time finishing her bite and slowly set the slice on her plate. "If I ask you something, do you promise me you'll answer honestly, even if you know it's not what I want to hear?"

"Yes," he said without hesitation.

She felt herself blushing a little as she tried to find the words to express the question that had been floating around in her mind all week. "Did you...did you kiss Kerri because I wasn't enough for you? Was I not...satisfying you?" The words sounded even more pathetic once they were out, and she instantly regretted saying them.

"Are you asking me if what happened was your fault?" Connor asked incredulously.

"Yes," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. Her heart leaped in surprise when he reached across the table and took her hand. The wave of sensation that coursed through her body at the simplest touch reminded her just what she had been missing.

"No. It was not your fault," he said firmly. "If you want to know, I'll tell you. That day, Kerri was asking me about you, about our relationship. I didn't really know what she was getting at, so I answered her. And I ended up admitting that you were...well, my first. And then she started in with this BS about if I was really going to live my life having only been with one woman." He shook his head at himself. "And you know, maybe part of me actually fell for that. And then the next thing I knew she was kissing me. I guess I just froze a little. But as soon as I realized what she was doing, I pushed her away, and I got out of there as quick as I could."

Dawn blinked slowly. As painful as it was to hear the details, she was glad that they were finally out in the open. "Did you kiss her back?"

"No." He realized he was still holding her hand, and thought about retracting it, but noticed that she was showing no discomfort. So he left it there, enjoying just touching her.

"Oh Connor..." she said quietly. She grasped his hand. "I do believe that what we have is stronger than her." There was no need to specify who she was referring to.

Connor felt like he might burst with happiness. "It is, Dawn. It is."

She slowly retracted her hand, her eyes moving to examine her half-eaten pizza slice. "Say, hypothetically, that I were agree to give this another try. How would it work? Would you expect me to invite you right back into my life, into my be...into the apartment?" she stammered.

He smiled at her. "We could do it however you want. Completely your terms. We could take it as slow as you want."

Dawn nodded. "The pizza's getting cold," she said suddenly. She took another bite, and he finally started to eat his. There was a long minute of silence while they ate. But it was a different silence than before. Some of the tension seemed to have dissipated.

"Buffy doesn't know I was meeting you," she stated. "I'm not sure why I didn't tell her. I just felt like it would be best if I didn't."

He nodded, a little surprised. "I know that I would have to win back her trust, too. She probably hates me even more than you do."

Dawn took another bite, ignoring his last statement. "Faith does know," she said, after she swallowed. "I didn't tell her, but she seems to have me all figured out. It's strange, she seems to understand me better than anyone else right now," she said, laughing a little at the absurdity of the statement.

"I saw her on the street the other day," Connor said. "Is...did something happen with her and Robin?"

"He died," Dawn said quietly. "She doesn't like to talk about it much, but it sounds like they were fighting, she thought he had it under control..."

"And he didn't," Connor finished. He sighed. "I'm sorry to hear that. Robin was a good guy."

"He was," Dawn agreed. "Faith's pretty broken up about it. She would never admit it though."

Connor nodded. "So, what did your new best friend Faith think about you meeting me?" he asked lightly.

"She said I'm lucky I have a second chance," she told him. They were quiet for a moment as they both ate some more pizza.

Not much else was said as they finished eating. They both understood that all the important things had been put out into the open, and they both grew increasingly comfortable as the meal wore on. Finally, Connor paid the bill. They looked at each other for a second, neither really wanting to leave, because they knew that it would mean being apart again. Finally Dawn rose from her seat. "Thank you. For dinner," she added lamely.

He stood up. "It was my pleasure. And thank you for hearing me out."

She nodded. The two of them walked through the restaurant and out the door. The sun was just starting to set, and the sky had taken on a beautiful glow. "It's going to be a nice day tomorrow," Dawn commented, gesturing at the shades of pink in the sky.

Watching her standing there, the light of dusk illuminating her features, it took all of Connor's willpower not to reach out and touch her face. "So, are we really going to do this? You're really going to give me another chance?"

Dawn sighed. "Yes. I will. But I want to take things slow, like you said. Connor, regardless of how much we've missed each other, there is still a lot of work to be done before we can get back to where we were."

He nodded, his face solemn. "I know. But at least you're giving me a chance to try and make it up to you." He gazed into her eyes. "So what happens now?"

"Well, if this were really a fresh start, I'd say we go on a date," she suggested.

"We could go see a movie, like we did on our first date," Connor said, fondly remembering that night. "Only, let's skip the horror this time."

She smiled. "Sounds good. How does Monday night sound?"

He groaned inwardly, realizing that Monday meant going 48 more hours without seeing her. But he quickly reminded himself that this was on her terms, and he understood that he couldn't rush her. "Sounds great." He paused. "Are you going to tell Buffy?"

"I don't know," she said honestly. "How about I meet you? You're staying with James, right?" He nodded. "I'll be there at seven then."

They stood there on the street, the street lamps slowly turning on around them as the night grew darker. "You don't know how badly I want to kiss you right now," Connor muttered.

Her heart seemed to skip a beat. Part of her ached for him, and screamed for her to let him. No. Not yet. She didn't want to let him off that easily. He had caused her a lot of pain, and as she thought of all the tears she had cried over him she briefly wondered what she was even doing here in the first place. You're following your heart, a tiny voice in her head reminded her. In the end, her feelings for Connor had won out over the rational voices and the pain.

Also, she knew that if she let him kiss her, neither of them would want to stop.

"Good night, Connor," she said. Against her better judgement she reached out and took his hand for a second, giving it a light squeeze.

He wrapped his fingers around hers. "Good night Dawn."

Let go. She hesitantly unraveled her fingers from his, giving him one final look before heading down the street into the brisk night.

As he watched her go, a thousand thoughts rushing through his head, he felt alive for the first time in days. "It's not too late," he said to himself with relief. He kept that thought in his head as he began the long walk back to James's dorm with an extra bounce in his step.

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TBC...