A/N: Here we go...sorry for the long wait. There shouldn't be TOO much time before the next update. I hope everyone's still enjoying the story...I know I'm certainly enjoying writing happy Dawn and Connor again. ;) Please continue to review and let me know what you're thinking! Your reviews are my encouragement!
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Chapter 19: Adjustments and Reflections
The next morning, Connor got up early, had breakfast with James, and headed out like a man on a mission. He had been mooching off his friend long enough, and it was about time he found his own place. He knew it wasn't going to be easy, his job did pay a decent wage, but paying rent and completely supporting himself was going to be a challenge. Back in Sunnydale he had his own apartment for a while, but Angel and Cordelia had sent checks to pay for the rent...and his Christmas present for Dawn, and bought things for the apartment...this time would be different. But he felt strangely optimistic as he headed down the street with purpose in his stride. Now that things were right again with Dawn, he felt like himself again. During their time apart he had constantly had this dark cloud hanging over him. But now that it had lifted, he found himself hopeful for the future again. Sure, there was still a little ways to go before things got back to the way they were, if that was even possible. He had some serious kissing up to do regarding Buffy, if he was ever going to make her trust him again. But he pushed that to the back of his mind. The important thing now making Dawn his number one priority in life, even moreso than before if possible. This whole ordeal had really proved to him beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was the best thing that ever happened to him, and he was not going to screw things up again.
He started off without a specific destination in mind, but he soon ended up in Buffy and Dawn's neighborhood, almost by instinct. It would make sense to find a place in the same area, it would make it easier to see Dawn. But he had to be careful not to get too close. He was on thin ice with Buffy right now, and if she had kicked him out only for him to move down the street, he was sure things wouldn't end well.
Remembering their experience with a realtor upon arriving in Rome, he wisely decided to just take matters into his own hands. With his perhaps unrealistically optimistic mindset, he cheerfully continued down the street, waiting for the right opportunity to present itself.
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Dawn rushed into homeroom only a few seconds before the bell, having been detained longer than usual by her sister. Her face was flushed from hurrying up the stairs as she sank into her usual seat beside Amelia. She turned to her friend, eager to tell her about everything that had happened since they had last seen each other, but she had yet to utter a syllable when Miss Valenti strode into the room. Dawn sighed with frustration, causing Amelia to look at her with curiosity. "You won't believe what happened," Dawn mouthed to her friend, who raised an eyebrow in anticipation. After a second a lightbulb seemed to go off in Amelia's head.
"Connor?" she mouthed back, a knowing expression on her face. Dawn nodded, beaming uncontrollably. Amelia could barely suppress her uncharacteristic squeal of delight. As Miss Valenti started to write the day's assignments on the board, Dawn opened her notebook and began to jot a note to her friend.
We're back together! Last night was so amazing. We went to the movies and things kind of started happening, and then he came back to the apartment and...you know!
She waited until the teacher's back was turned before she dropped the folded paper on the floor, kicking it over to Amelia casually. Her friend caught on immediately, dropping her pencil and scooping up the note along with it. Dawn watched her face as she read the note, watching the blonde grin before scrawling something on the paper herself and kicking it back.
I'm so happy for you! See, I told you everything would work out!
Dawn was about to send the note back when Miss Valenti came around, handing out a classwork assignment. Instead she just gave her friend a look that clearly said "we'll talk later." Amelia nodded in response and they both focused their attention on their work, occasionally sneaking little sideways grins at each other.
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"Wow. That's crazy," Amelia said, her eyes wide as the two of them stood by the sinks in the bathroom during their first break of the day.
Dawn nodded in agreement. She had just finished relaying the events of the previous night and her conversation with Buffy this morning. Of course she had to glaze over a few parts, such as the real reason that Connor had ended up coming inside in the first place being that he was banged up from a vampire fight. "So yeah. It does suck just a little because it's going to be a lot harder to spend time with him now that Buffy's on the warpath."
"Don't even think that way. You guys will find a way to make it work. And who knows, maybe not being together 24/7 will even add some...I don't know, spice to the relationship," Amelia suggested, leaning against the sink.
Dawn laughed. "I guess you never know. But I'm just...I feel so happy right now. I feel like I'm alive again. This morning on the way here, everything just seemed a little brighter, the flowers, the sun."
"You were practically glowing when you walked into class this morning," Amelia noted. "I could tell something was up even before you said anything."
"Am I that obvious?" Dawn said with a giggle, still grinning from ear to ear.
"No, obvious is what you guys did last night! It's no wonder you got in trouble with Buffy, what were you guys thinking?" Amelia chastised playfully.
Dawn groaned slightly, resting her head against the wall. "I don't know, we just got a little carried away, I guess. But it was really stupid. Not to mention embarrassing."
Amelia raised an eyebrow in agreement. "So, are you going to see him tonight?"
"I don't know. As of right now he's still living with James...but I assume he'll probably start looking for his own place now that he knows he's definitely not moving back in to the apartment."
"Can he afford that?" her friend asked with concern.
Dawn shrugged sheepishly. "I don't know. I mean, his job pays pretty well. But life is expensive these days. His dad would give him money in a heartbeat..." she realized what a poor choice of words that had been before continuing, "but I know that asking him for help is probably at the bottom of Connor's list."
"They don't have a good relationship?" Amelia asked with a frown.
"Well, it's complicated," Dawn said delicately. "Angel didn't raise Connor, he was taken away when he was little and then came back a few months before I met him. Connor wasn't very accepting of Angel as his dad at first. They've made some progress now. But I still know that there are few things Connor would hate more than begging his dad for money. It's not just their past, it's his personality."
She nodded, understanding. "Sounds like he must have had a complicated childhood."
You don't know the half of it, Dawn thought to herself as she agreed. "Yeah. He did." She suddenly realized something. "You haven't even met him yet, have you?"
"No. With all the drama going on, I haven't had the chance," Amelia said playfully. "I feel like I already know him though."
"Well, we still have to make it official. Hey, we should all hang out this weekend, me and Connor, Gina, you, James. It would be fun!"
"Yeah, fifth wheel, sounds like tons of fun," she said dryly.
Dawn gave her a pouty look. "Come on. You could have a great guy. You just need to put yourself out there a little more."
Amelia crossed her arms self-consciously. "I don't know, Dawn. I'm not nearly as pretty as you or Gina."
"Don't ever say that. You are pretty. And you're also one of the friendliest, sweetest people I've ever met. Remember those guys in the club when we went out with Gina? They were interested in you," Dawn pointed out triumphantly.
Her friend blushed. "I guess."
Dawn put her arm around Amelia. "The right guy will come along for you. I promise. Sometimes it just takes time. I'd never been in a successful relationship...actually, any relationship, before I met Connor."
"Really?" Amelia said with disbelief. "I would have thought a girl like you would have had boyfriends since junior high."
"Hardly," Dawn said dryly. "I think that a lot of it came from watching my sister. Buffy's been...well, she hasn't had much luck in the love department."
"Wasn't she involved with Connor's father?" Amelia asked, remembering that Dawn had mentioned that the first time they had talked.
"Yeah. They had something really special. But it didn't really work out for a lot of reasons," she said vaguely. "I still don't think Buffy's really moved on from him. I mean, there have been other guys, but it's never been the same."
The bell rang, letting them know that it was time to continue on to class. Dawn glanced in the mirror, giving her hair a toss and checking for lipstick on her teeth. "Do you think they'll ever get back together? Your sister and his dad?"
Dawn gave her a sad smile. "Who knows. I mean, a lot of the reasons they broke up are still an issue," she said slowly, trying to explain things without...explaining things. The two of them gathered their books and headed into the hallway.
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When Dawn came home from school, she found that she had the apartment to herself. She dumped her bag on a chair and headed to the fridge to grab a drink. Spotting a pink Post-it right at eye level, she peeled it off, recognizing her sister's handwriting:
Dawn,
I'm working the day shift today. I should be home by five. Remember what we talked about this morning.
Love,
Buffy
Dawn couldn't help but roll her eyes. That was so typical of her sister, subtly warning her to not even think about going out to see Connor without actually saying it. She knew that was all she had to say. Dawn had no intention of disobeying Buffy's new rules. Not yet, at least. It was a punishment she had deserved after lying to her sister and then getting caught red-handed.
"She didn't say anything about phone calls," she said rationally, grabbing the phone and flopping down on the couch. She dialed James's number first, figuring that was the most likely place Connor would be. James answered on the third ring.
"Hello?"
"Hey James, it's Dawn. Is Connor there?"
"No, sorry, he's not. Last I saw him was early this morning, he was going out apartment hunting."
"Oh, I figured he might be doing that. You don't know if he had any luck?" she asked hopefully.
"Nope. I think he should be at work now. I'm going in later, I'll tell him you called."
"Okay, that would be great. Just tell him to call me."
"I will. And Dawn?" There was a pause. "I'm really glad you guys worked things out."
She smiled softly. "Me too. I'll talk to you later, James."
"Bye."
She hung up the phone and glanced at the clock. She played with the idea of calling Connor's work, but usually he was out on a job anyway and she just ended up struggling to make someone who spoke Italian understand what she wanted. I really need to get him a cell phone, she thought. Now that they weren't living together, she didn't like the idea of not being able to talk to him whenever she wanted. She still had her own, although she had barely used it since they had come to Rome. Maybe it was time to break it out again.
She looked longingly at the tv. Libero e Bello, her favorite Italian soap was on. Today Fiyero and Desdemona were getting the paternity test results for little Armando. But as much as she wanted to see what happened next, she had a pile of homework calling her name, and if she didn't get started right away, any chance she had of seeing Connor that night would evaporate. So with a sigh she pushed the remote aside and began piling her books on the coffee table.
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It was a few minutes after five when Buffy entered the apartment, balancing a pizza box in one hand. She smiled proudly upon seeing Dawn on the couch, scribbling intently in a notebook, a textbook open in front of her. "Hey Dawnie," she called out, sitting the box on the counter and hanging up her jacket. "How was your day?"
"Hey Buffy," she said, her voice chipper. "It was good." She closed the textbook with a satisfying thwack, and stacked the notebook on top. "And I am done with my homework."
Her sister stared at her, obviously impressed. "All of it?"
"Yup." She bounced to her feet, making a beeline for the pizza box. "You thought I didn't listen," she accused casually, fetching a paper plate from the cabinet.
Buffy blinked, surprised. "No, it's not that, I just thought...I'd thought you'd try to resist it more."
"Why would I?" she asked, before taking a large bite of pizza.
Buffy moved to the cabinet, getting herself a plate. "Well, I'm glad that you decided not to fight me on this." She gave her little sister a serious look. "I only want what's best for you, Dawn."
"And Connor's what's best for me," she replied cheerfully, not missing a beat. "Which is why I'm going to go see him as soon as I'm finished with this pizza. And before you can say anything, I already finished my homework, I'll be back by eleven, and I already told you where I'm going."
She wasn't giving Buffy any room to argue. "Okay. I promised I wouldn't stop you."
Dawn polished off her slice of pizza with one last, giant bite before tossing the plate in the garbage. Then, just like clockwork, the phone rang and she bounced to pick it up. "Hello?" The wide grin that broke out on her face immediately let Buffy know who it was. "Hey! I miss you too. So, where are you?" She listened for a moment, propping the phone between her ear and her shoulder as she pulled on her shoes that she had kicked under the coffee table earlier. "Oh, okay, sure. I can't wait." She grinned, if possible, even wider. "I'll see you soon...I love you too." She hung up the phone and turned to her sister. "Connor just got out of work, and he's coming over to pick me up. Then we're going out. He'll be here in ten minutes." She disappeared into the bathroom, moving as if she was floating on a cloud.
Buffy chewed her pizza hard, trying not to be mad. She was still incredibly pissed at Connor for what he had done to her sister. A part of her had even hoped that with her new rules and regulations Dawn would see less of him and maybe even come to realize she was making a mistake. But clearly, that wasn't the case. And she couldn't exactly say that anything that was making her little sister happier than she had been in weeks was bad.
"Where's Faith?" Dawn called from the bathroom.
Buffy laughed. "Who knows? You wouldn't even think she lived here, since she's only here about 6 hours a day."
Dawn emerged from the bathroom, running a brush through her hair. "You know, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm kind of glad she came here."
The blonde slayer raised an eyebrow. "Didn't you used to hate Faith?"
"Yeah, I did. But I don't know. Back in Sunnydale, those last few days, I kind of came to...not hate her as much. And now, since she's been here...I feel bad for her. I know she's hurting more than she lets on. And in some weird way, the two of us just get each other."
Buffy couldn't help but feel a little uncomfortable at the way her sister talked of Faith almost...fondly? "I never thought I'd hear you say that," she said after a long silence. She frowned, thinking. "What exactly happened between you guys back in Sunnydale that made you not hate her as much?"
Dawn froze slightly, unsure if that was a topic she wanted to discuss with her sister right now. "Well, um, it wasn't really any one specific thing-"
"Come on, she must have done something," Buffy pried.
"There was this one night in the Bronze when we had kind of a nice conversation." Dawn quickly escaped to her bedroom, hoping her sister would drop it.
"About what?" Buffy rose from her seat and went to stand in Dawn's doorway, watching her as she reapplied some lip gloss in front of the mirror.
"About Connor," Dawn admitted. "I was just thinking about some stuff, I was still a little nervous, since it was my first real relationship. I just didn't want to mess anything up. And Faith just kind of made me feel better."
Buffy leaned against the doorframe, directing her gaze down at her feet. "You could have talked to me, you know."
Dawn gave her a quizzical look. "You were a little busy at the time, saving the world and all. Don't be offended. I know that I can talk to you about stuff."
Buffy wasn't so convinced. "Yeah. Okay." There was a brief uncomfortable silence until a knock on the door interrupted it. Dawn's eyes brightened instantly as she threw her lip gloss in her purse and practically bolted out of the bedroom like a bat out of hell. She flung the door open, revealing a smiling Connor on the other side.
"Hey baby," she said softly, stepping into him for a kiss, which lasted probably longer than it should have, considering they had an audience. Finally, Buffy moved towards the door, causing them to reluctantly break apart.
"Hello Buffy," Connor said cordially.
Buffy nodded towards him, a small, forced smile on her lips. "Hello Connor." She cleared her throat. "You can have Dawn fill you in on the new rules. But have her home by eleven."
His eyebrow raised slightly at the mention of 'rules', but he hid it well. "Um, okay. I will."
"Bye Buffy," Dawn called over her shoulder, her hand already happily entwined with Connor's. The door closed and Buffy was left in the empty apartment with only a barely-touched pizza to keep her company.
She glanced at the remaining pizza, but she had lost her appetite. She absently closed the box and wandered into the living room, coming to a stop by the window. She looked down just in time to see Dawn and Connor walking off happily down the street, still holding hands. It still seemed so strange to her that it hadn't been too long ago that she had come home to find her sister practically drowning in her own tears in the living room, and now she seemed to have completely forgotten. That's true love, she couldn't help but think.
As if on cue, the phone rang, causing her to jump slightly. They didn't get many calls, so when it did ring it usually caught her off guard. She knew who it was before she even crossed the room halfway. She had always had this strange sixth sense when it came to him. Buffy had her hand on the receiver by the second ring, but she waited a moment, not wanting to seem too eager. Finally, on the third ring, she picked up, trying to keep her voice casual as if she had no idea who was calling. "Hello?"
"Buffy. Hey." Yup, there it was. The strange sensation in her stomach that always accompanied hearing his voice, especially when it had been a while.
"Hi Angel," she said, trying her best to sound chipper.
"It's been a while, so I just thought I'd call and see how you were doing," he said, attempting small talk.
Buffy winced inwardly as she realized that things had changed since they had last talked. He was going to find out that Connor wasn't living with them anymore eventually, so it was probably best if she broke the news to him now. "Everything's fine," she said vaguely.
"How's my- how's Connor? And Dawn?" he asked.
"They're good. They actually just went out together," Buffy informed him, leaning against the kitchen counter. She knew that she should interject and explain somehow everything that happened, but she didn't know where to begin.
"Okay. What aren't you telling me?" he said gently, after a short silence.
Even thousands of miles away he could see right through her. "Well, I suppose something has changed since we last talked. Things have been a little...tense the past couple weeks. But the good news is, everything seems to be completely back to normal now," she reassured him.
"Buffy?" he asked warningly.
"Okay, okay. Well...Connor isn't exactly living here, with us, anymore." She braced herself for his inevitable reaction. She had to admit that she did feel a little guilty about virtually kicking Angel's son out...well, technically, Dawn had kicked him out and she had just...refused to allow him back.
"Excuse me? Why not? Where is he? Did he and Dawn..."
"They had some...problems. Something happened, they had a big fight, Dawn kind of kicked him out. He's been staying with a friend of his from work for the past couple weeks. But then I guess they both realized that they couldn't stand to be apart, so they're back together and they seem to be happier than ever," she said, trying to sound happier than she was about it.
"But Connor isn't moving back in," Angel said flatly.
"Um, no, not so much. Come on, Angel, you have to understand where I'm coming from at least a little. He really upset my sister, I mean really upset her. I'm surprised that she even forgave him, honestly. But I guess that what they have between them is stronger than I thought."
"Well, what do you expect him to do, Buffy?" Angel said, sounding worried.
She rolled her eyes dramatically. "I might have considered letting him move back in if Dawn didn't lie to me and choose not to tell me that she was seeing him again. And if I didn't learn the news in a very...shocking way when I came home last night and found the two of them...you know."
She could practically hear Angel raising his eyebrows. "Oh." He cleared his throat. "Well, um, I guess I can understand. But, is he okay? He can't stay with this friend of his forever."
"I would think that now he knows he's definitely not moving back in that he'd start looking for his own place."
"How can he afford that?" Angel said worriedly.
"I don't know, okay? He has a decent job, I'm sure he can afford something." She was feeling even more guilty now.
"Will you please tell him to call me?" Angel said tightly.
"I will," Buffy promised. She thought quickly, desperate to change the subject. "Oh, and Faith is here."
"Faith? In Rome?" he said with surprise. "I thought she was in New York."
"She was. Robin's dead," she said quietly. There was silence on the other end as Angel took in this news. "I guess they were fighting some vamps and one of them got the better of him. Faith feels responsible."
"I know I barely knew him, but Robin seemed like a great guy. I'm sorry to hear that." He paused. "How is she?"
"Who knows? I mean, she puts on a good show, tries her hardest to pretend everything's fine. But Dawn's convinced that she's pretty torn up." And she agreed. Last night when she had really looked at Faith, really looked at her for the first time since she'd arrived, she had glimpsed the pain in her eyes that Dawn had seen all along, probably because she had been feeling the same way.
"That's how Faith operates. She liked to pretend nothing gets to her, but it all does. But I'm surprised that she worked up the courage to go to you," Angel commented. "I'm glad she did."
"Yeah. So am I." And so's my sister, her new best friend.
The two of them talked for a few more minutes. Angel told her that Willow had called about a week earlier, and that she and Kennedy were doing well in South America. Buffy felt bad for not having kept in better contact with her friends, and made it a point to give Giles, Willow, and Xander a call sometime very soon. She told him that Dawn was doing well in school, and talked a little about Gina and her job. After a while it became clear that they were both just dragging out the conversation because neither one wanted to break the connection.
"Is everything okay with you?" he finally asked hesitantly. "You sound a little...distant."
She sighed. "Yeah, everything's fine. It's just...I don't know. I feel a little lonely sometimes. I hardly ever see Dawn, even Faith is never around. Sometimes I just miss everyone." She was surprised to hear herself say this out loud, it was really the first time she had allowed herself to do so. She knew deep down that part of the reason she hadn't been calling her friends regularly was because hearing their voices would just make her miss them even more. It was ironic, really. She thought it had been lonely being the Chosen One, but now that she was one of many, she felt more alone than ever.
"Well, when I talked to Willow, we had an idea. We thought that maybe everyone could come back here for the holidays in a few months. I know people are busy and everyone might not be able to make it, but it might be a good time to just get together. I mean, only if you're okay with it," he added quickly.
She smiled. "That sounds really great."
"Good." There was a long pause, as they had both finally run out of things to say. "Well, I guess I'll let you go. Tell Connor to call me, and say hi to Dawn and Faith."
"I will. Bye Angel."
"Goodbye Buffy." She hung up the phone, then as usual sat there for a minute longer to regain her composure and assume normal breathing patterns again. She felt relaxed again by the time the door opened and Faith strolled in.
"Ooh, pizza," she said happily, eagerly opening the box and helping herself to a piece, not bothering with anything as frivolous as a plate. "Where's Dawn?" she said with her mouth full.
"She went out with Connor. I have to say I'm impressed, she finished her homework early so she could see him without breaking any of our new rules," Buffy said wryly.
Faith pulled herself onto a stool, already almost finished with her slice. "Angel just called," Buffy said suddenly. "He said to say hi."
Faith nodded, considering this. "I suppose you told him what happened," she said after gulping down the last bit of crust and reaching for a new slice.
"Yeah. I did. He was very sorry to hear about Robin." Buffy could tell from Faith's expression that this wasn't exactly a conversation she wanted to have, so she changed the subject. "But anyway, he mentioned that he talked to Willow and they thought it might be fun if everyone got together in LA for Christmas."
"Great. The Scoobie Gang all deckin' the halls together," she said with a smirk in between bites.
Buffy laughed. "Well, I think it could be good for all of us."
Faith studied her for a moment. "You must be gettin' really lonely out here, B, willing to waltz all the way back to LA, leave your job, your new life, everything."
"It would only be for a couple of days," Buffy muttered, feeling suddenly uncomfortable. She looked around. "Um, I think I'm going to go out for a little while." She strode quickly to the door, grabbing her coat on the way. "I'll see you later."
"Later," Faith called after her, starting on her third piece of pizza, frowning slightly as she wondered what that was all about.
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"Ouch," Connor said with a wince. Dawn had just finished relaying to him her conversation with Buffy earlier that day, and the new rules that existed in her life.
"I know. But I made up my mind, I'm not going to let her win. I'm not going to let this prevent me from having everything I want," Dawn said confidently, beaming up at him as they strolled down the street hand in hand.
"Well, I went apartment-hunting today," he announced. "It's funny how many times I've done that in the last year," he realized with a chuckle.
"And?" she asked excitedly. "Did you find anything?"
"Actually, I did. Well, I think so at least. Nothing's finalized yet, but I think it could work," he said slowly.
"Where is it? What's it like?" she demanded.
"It's actually not far from here, only about a five minute walk from your place. And it's...it's small, but small is pretty much what I can afford, and I figure I don't need much space anyway. Just enough for me and you when you can...escape."
She gave him a look before continuing. "But is it nice? I mean, clean and everything? I don't want you living in some hole-in-the-wall crappy apartment. I'd feel way too guilty."
"No, it's really not crappy. Just...small. But with the right furniture I think it'll be fine. But Dawn, there's no reason for you to feel guilty. It was your sister who kicked me out," he said gently.
She came to a stop, looking up at him. "No, it wasn't. I kicked you out. Buffy just made it permanent."
He reached out to tuck her hair behind her ear. "No. Don't even say that. That's all behind us, remember?"
"I know, I know. But I just feel bad. Now you're going to be living in some miserable little dumpy-"
"Dawn, it's really not dumpy-"
"Sure, whatever. But I just..." She was forced to stop talking when his lips suddenly landed on hers, forceful but still gentle. She relented and returned the kiss, relaxing into his arms.
"I don't want to ever hear you say that you feel responsible for what happened," he said, his voice so low it was almost inaudible. She nodded slowly. He touched her chin playfully. "Now what do you say we go find something fun to do?"
"I'll go anywhere with you," she said. It was clear that she meant it. She leaned her head on his shoulder as they continued down the street towards whatever the night might bring.
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TBC! Please review!