I'm sorry it took so long to get the results posted. I'm just having a super stressful time in my life. I'm in my school's musical, and that sucks up three and a half hours a day, and then I'm in a really, like top choir so on Tuesdays, it takes two hours, and Saturdays we have three hours of rehearsal. And since we have a four day performance tour next week, we're putting rehearsals everyday now. Not to mention school and homework.

So could you find it in your hearts to forgive me? I'm doing it now, so calm down. ^_^

2nd HONORABLE MENTION – THE BITTERSWEETNESS OF DEATH

By: Lillian Whitlock

Contest Host Review:

This fic was so incredibly detailed, and indeed bittersweet. The details struck me very deep with the snow on the trees, and the beauty she observed while standing on the cliff. And we never see much of Esme's past, so it was so amazing to get a glimpse into what her human life was like, and how much it hurt to have lost the only person who had ever loved her unconditionally. Everything was described so incredibly. I loved it. And the way she sees Carlisle at the end—an angel coming to take her to heaven. It's just wonderful.

Congratulations Lillian Whitlock!

(btw, I would like to remind readers that when Lillian send the Microsoft Word document to me, she put a little not a the bottom that said "The title is in Edwardian Script" That made me smile and laugh! Kudos for Lillian! ^_^)

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The Bitter Sweetness of Death

By: Lillian Whitlock

Esme's P.O.V.

Esme's transformation and the events to it

The chilled winds of death and despair shook the trees around me like I had shivered on the dreadful winter day, the day that the news of my precious child's death crashed upon me. The force of the pain's pressure was so astounding; it was a pain that a mere human could not sustain, a pain that was drowning me under an endless sea, like a magnet attracted to my sorrow, dragging me to the depth of the ocean, the last of my humanity.

I was resurfacing the waves of grief, unsure of where to go, but not wanting to get sucked back into depression. Realization hit me, location was redundant, but distance, however… The necessity of putting space between me and this … this unbearable pain was overwhelming. I had to escape it. I began to run.

The trees were a blur as I ran through the forest. I was oblivious to the fact that I was lost. Deep down I knew I would never find my way back, the reason behind this is not that I was unable to, but that I was not going back. I would perish if I continued to live with the pain that was eating away at me each day I tried to live a life. I needed a distraction, to steer my thoughts away from where I never wanted them to return, so instead I gazed around me. Snow, the color of death, was falling from the heavens, which suited my mood nevertheless. It was covering the forest, looking as if it were cleaning it. The snow was demolishing life but giving it a chance to start again like a clean slate. That's exactly what I need, a clean slate, a fresh start, but how?

At that moment I spotted a refuge, it was beautiful. The ledge lay in a perfect spot. It overlooked the stunning forest, the white trees and glistening icicles could be seen. It captured the marvelous view of the sky, still snowing. The beauty of the sight did not mingle well with the ugliness of the feelings inside me; it was hurtful to look at. But I knew that this was my heart's desire, the answer to my question.

I knew exactly what I had to do. Surely God would see the reasons in my attempt to start a new life. A life that does not include the pain that penetrates my heart each time I think about my life's one miracle. A life that includes doing something other than crying my heart out and drowning in my sorrow. I want a life where I am surrounded by people I love especially my little one. I know that it is impractical for me to think that a life such as perfect as that should ever be possessed by me, an insignificant person, but my last hope was that I join my child. For the few minutes that I had left I thought about the recent and disastrous occurrences that had happened to me, making my life a living hell.

My little one was dead. She was so precious the first and last time I had seen her. Her pale eye lids closed, her eye color unknown, her smooth faded skin, her caramel hair resembled mine; her mouth was quiet, unable to cry because she was no longer here. I sniffled. She was the most beautiful baby had I seen in my life. Then as soon as I got to hold her she was taken from me. The only person in my life that I loved and that I actually thought could love me was gone. I had never known what it felt like to be loved; my husband had never given me love, instead cuts and bruises. He never loved me and I will never love him. That was the least of the problems I was facing. The only person to touch my heart, and that I cared about immensely was gone.

The sad events in my life will be forgotten, soon. I was tired of my hate-filled days on earth, so I started to walk toward the end of the ledge. Most people fell a rush of adrenaline when they do something audacious, but in my case I was exhausted. The days I have had without sleep came at me all at once. I staggered and trudged closer, my feet marking where I have been and will go. I was at the end, hanging on to the last string of my sanity, one more step and I would reunite with my child. I took a deep breath as the wind stroked my face, asking me if I was really going to jump. Closing my eyes I pictured the only memory I had of my baby, and whispered "Yes." With that said I leaped, without hesitation and fear.

The physical pain that soon greeted me was just a faded reflection of what I had felt when I lost my baby. My legs were no longer responding, as well as my arms. My head was pinned down to the ground by the weight of my decision. The only movement I could perform was opening my eyes. This was my wish, I wanted death, and the pain was just a cost that I would have to pay, I was willing. While I was barely conscious, I impatiently waited for death to find me.

The wind seemed harsher than it was a few seconds ago, whipping my hair around my face. I soon felt cold arms engulf me. I opened my eyes to see an angel, a blonde angel. He was dreadfully beautiful. The features of his face were pale, soft, and perfect. I wanted to stroke his cheeks and nose to make sure he was real, but I was paralyzed. He took me and flew us through the forest. The last thought I had before everything went black was "Death can't be this bad if I have an angel beside me."

~fin~

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