Disclaimer: Bleach is not mine and never will be.
Abe: I'm glad it isn't.
Me: What did you say?! (glares at brother)
Jen-Jen: He said up your butt and around the corner, hahaha! (points at me and laughs)
Me: (sweat drops) Uh… Jennifer, where'd you come from?
Jen-Jen: Up your butt and around the corner!
Me: What?! No way! (glares) You came from your mom's vagina!
Abe:…
Jen-Jen:…
Me:…It's true.
Jen-Jen: Ah, you've tainted my mind!
Me: Oh, just shut up woman!
Jen-Jen: I'm not a woman yet!
Me: Yeah, you're still learning how to be a "big girl" (rolls eyes).
Jen-Jen: Take this!! (throws pen at me)
Me: Ow, you whore! Do you know how many times you've hit me on the head with that?!
Jen-Jen flees the scene.
Me: Oi, I'm talking to you! Come back here!! (shakes fist)
Abe:…Back to the story…
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Chapter9: The Worse Hope Can Do
"Yoruichi, when you said you couldn't cook, I didn't think that you meant it like this."
"Uh… Well, I didn't say I was the best…"
"Mm… Maybe you should've said you were the best at disasters then."
"Oh, it's not that bad…"
"Are you trying to make me laugh?"
The two ended up pausing. Blink. Blink. The two erupted into sudden laughter. A few seconds later though, Soi caught herself and stopped. Her eyes widened and she shut her mouth tightly as if laughing was no such thing to do. Yoruichi's renovating laughter was echoing into her ears as it bounced off and on the walls of her house. Soi bit her lip.
"Hey, S-Soi, where are….where are you going?!" the stripper gasped as she went into full blown giggles. Soi had abruptly left the room but hadn't even replied to Yoruichi's question. Confusion entered her system but she had to control her mirth before approaching the cold woman.
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"Hello, Soi, hello?"
Startled, the Chinese woman glanced up and blinked as Yoruichi's smiling face met hers. "Y-Yoruichi."
The woman before her nodded and sat down beside her, sighing happily as a grin stretched her dark lips. "Why'd you leave me with the burnt food? Escaping while I was laughing, how rude."
"Oh, I didn't mean to, it's just…" Soi's voice faded and she shook her head. "Never mind. I guess we'll just have some instant ramen, or would you prefer I order pizza?"
The question caught the goddess off guard. "Excuse me?" she asked puzzled with her head cocked to the side. Her light robe had slid slightly to reveal a toned shoulder and it had instantly caught Soi's attention before she forced her gaze back to Yoruichi's face.
She smirked. "We haven't gotten anything to eat, with you grabbing all those ingredients and using them for who knows what. I couldn't even tell a difference between the---"
"All right, all right! Sheesh, no need to make it as if I slaughtered the food or whatever!" the stripper groaned as Soi chuckled amusedly. "Well, both is fine. You can pick this time."
As she watched Soi leave the room to prepare "dinner", Yoruichi quickly took her purse nearby and dug for her cell. 'Here we are,' she thought in satisfaction, 'Now, let's see…' She checked the messages sent to her from her 'work' and mentally gave a fed up sigh. 'Can't they just leave me in peace?' she gritted her teeth and called the number, her bright eyes glancing back quickly to where Soi had gone. 'Come on, come on…'
"You finally call, eh?"
She winced. She hoped the Boss wasn't back yet. "Hey Boss, something you wanted to tell me?"
"I hear you haven't been doing your duties."
She cursed but at least it seems that he hasn't come back yet, that's good. "Now, where'd you hear that?" she asked sweetly. 'I'm gonna kill that person…'
"It's not important. What's important, Yoruichi, is you doing your job! Or do you want me to contact the big man? Your father wouldn't want to hear this, now would he?"
Yoruichi instantly paled but somewhere inside her a flame of fury burned. "Look--"
"No, you look, you fuck'n stripper. You may be the man's daughter, but he surely doesn't give a shit about you so you're basically a fuck toy for the guys who work under him. You do know that he would sell you away to those guys he owed so much if he hadn't been so lucky with these nightclubs of his? Huh?! Do you?!"
Yoruichi's grip had tightened on the small device and her teeth hurt from the pressure she was giving it. The Boss sounded on the verge of getting drunk, but still. 'Father… he wouldn't…'
'He wouldn't if mom was still alive,' whispered a voice at the back of her mind.
The stripper shook her head angrily. "Y-yes, Boss. I know…"
He seemed calmed now. "Now, be a good girl and wait till Daddy comes home. I'll be wanting some of that."
'You're not my father,' was what she wanted to retort but she knew if she said that, he would just tell her father and her father would hit her and make her fuck with the "big people" just so that he could get some money. She was his key to money. Nothing more. She nodded weakly. "Yes." She heard him hang up.
'That was a short conversation,' a part of her mused. 'Who cares. Let's ditch this place and go. I've had enough of this bull and I'm ready to get some payback,' said another part of her that was grinning evilly. 'No, I can't leave. I just met Soi and…'
Everything will change for the better?
"Shit!"
The stripper jumped, almost screamed, when she looked up with wild eyes to find Soi cursing with a long string of swear words, her mouth clamped on her hand. Realizing that it was just Soi and she may be hurt, she instantly rushed to Soi's side and took the woman's hand out of her mouth, examining it before bringing her straight to the sink. She glanced Soi's way when she gave a hiss of pain at the sting the water was giving her. When all was done, she become conscious of her own hands shaking. Was it because of her conversation with the Boss?
"Hey, are you okay?"
The tanned woman turned to face Soi who had a worried look on her face, her hand clothing itself with the spare towel nearby. Not knowing why Soi would ask that, she jokingly said, "I should be asking that. Did you burn your hand?"
The shorter of the two shook her head. "No, just spilled some of the hot water on my hand. The ramen should be done, though."
Yoruichi could care less about that now. She shook her head and took a step closer. "I don't care about that. Are you still hurt?" Her eyes were piercing Soi and was uncharacteristically stern.
"It'll go away sooner or later," Soi replied hastily with a tint of blush on her cheeks. She turned her head away. "If you don't mind, think you can carry the ramen for me? I…"
The goddess smiled softly, the talk with her Boss forgotten. "Yeah, I'll get it. Go make yourself comfortable in the living room."
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Did you notice? I made this chapter shorter, mwuhahahaha! I'm so evil.
Tina: Yes, you are. You laugh evil too much.
Me: (rolls eyes) Great, are all my friends gonna pop everywhere now?
Hien: Shut up, Bleach Lover!
Me: What?! Hien, you're here too?! And, so what if I'm a Bleach lover?!
Hien: Woman!
Me: You're stealing my words!!
Anyways, if you haven't notice, then you're crazy. More crazy than me and I don't like that 'cause, you wanna know why? No one can be MY kind of crazy, mwuahahaha!
Tina: You're laughing evilly again…
Me: Shut up, Tina!