Notes: Roxas is acting sadistic in this chapter. Probably even more so then in chapter two. I wanted to show him being sadistic to a point because I wanted to do a transition type of thing but I think I'm over doing it. I really want to keep him IC but he's coming across as a whinny brat. There weren't that many scenes that showed him in Organization XIII in the game so… I don't know.
The story is going to focus on Roxas for a bit and Sora and Riku probably aren't going to come in for another ten chapters or so which is where the story is actually going to start. See told you this would be a long one.
Anyway, thanks so much to everyone who took time out to review. I really appreciate it. I also replaced the first two chapters again. I mainly just changed some dialog.
Chapter 4: Begin Again
DIZ lifted both of his hands to his face and tenderly began to massage the bridge of his nose. There was a faint throbbing at the back of his head that was threatening to turn into a full fledge headache. His vision was starting to become distorted, eyelids feeling heavy. He hadn't moved from his chair since Riku left and staring fixedly at the several computer monitors was starting to get to him. All he wanted to do was shut his eyes from the world, lay his head on the desk, and sleep but he knew this wasn't an option.
The simulation he and Riku were going to put Roxas through was very in depth, requiring months of relentless effort and nonstop work on his part. DIZ couldn't remember the last time he slept more then three hours in a night or the last time he sat down to eat. Completing the program had been the only thing that mattered, his health coming second. The simulation was on the borderline of crude, no doubt from a result of rushing something that should have taken years into a few months. However, DIZ would make due.
DIZ needed the program absolutely ready for when Riku came back. The cloaked man was still putting the finishing touches on it, which would require at least a few more hours of tedious work. With a deep breath, he put his fingers back on the keyboard. He needed to finish this. The program was a very important part of his and Riku's plan and vital to awakening the keyblade master. DIZ began to enter a new code and check through the simulation when his eyes fell shut and his head dropped forward, he then also realized he needed some more coffee.
DIZ stiffly stood up from his chair and rolled sore shoulders, grabbing his coffee cup, he hit the light switch, and made his way out of the control room. He kept the coffee maker right outside. As he poured steaming coffee, his thoughts drifted to Riku. It had been well over four hours since the silver haired teen had left and DIZ still didn't expect him back for some time. There was a whole world Riku had to track down Roxas in but DIZ couldn't stop himself from feeling highly troubled, with each passing second, growing more and more anxious.
It hadn't been easy to let all his hard work ride in the hands of another, to give up control, letting everything depend on the silver haired teen. If Riku failed or if something happened to him, DIZ knew all they'd done would be for nothing. Riku had sworn he would bring back Roxas and DIZ believed him but it was far from a sure thing. In spite of everything, Riku was still just an unreasonable teenager who'd been through more in the past year then people go through in a lifetime. Sometimes it was hard for DIZ to remember Riku was only sixteen. Anything was possible in The World That Never Was and DIZ wouldn't be reassured until Roxas was safe and contained inside the lab.
DIZ wondered sometimes if he was doing the right thing concerning Roxas. What the blonde would experience and how he would react during the simulation was something he rarely allowed himself to think about. Yet, DIZ was only human and ever so often, it crossed his mind. The bandaged man was going to manipulate the memories of a nobody, a nobody that lived, breathed, and had its own mind.
The simulation would throw off the organization and give Roxas things he could have never hoped to obtain; friends, happiness, a place to belong. The blonde would then slowly awaken from it, his new life being ripped away in the process. When everything was over, Roxas would realize he was only being used and that his only importance was to hand over everything he was for the sake of another. Roxas would be broken, taken apart piece by piece, and made to fade away. In return, the keyblade master would be revived.
The cloaked man knew it had to be done. If what he was doing was callous, so be it. He'd told himself over and over again that this was the fate of a nobody. Roxas wasn't supposed to exist, he didn't have a heart so he wasn't really a person. This was to save the worlds but a darker part of DIZ knew that wasn't the only reason. He wanted revenge against the organization. Organization XIII had taken his work, his dreams, and his life. Vengence was the only thing he found worth mattering anymore and Roxas was just the unfortunate key to accomplishing it.
DIZ knew in part his plans for revenge were a fool's dream but at the same time, he knew he could never abandon them, would see them through to the end because he'd started this chaos and the least he could do was finish it. He supposed he really just wanted it over with, maybe he only was a tired old man.
DIZ sighed as he rose his nearly overflowing cup to his lips. The coffee was strong, black, and the taste slightly bitter but DIZ would not have it any other way. The hot liquid felt soothing on his tongue and the heat from the cup pleasant on his hands. The cup was white and chipped in places and the only procession DIZ still had from before the organization was formed. He was somewhat attached to it, would even call it faithful if he wasn't beyond referring to an inanimate object in that sense.
With one, more stretch of his sore muscles and coffee in tow, DIZ made his way back to the control room, flipping on the light switch, he knew at once something was off, eyes snapped to the center of the room. His chair was moved aside, breath hitching and his stomach twisted at what he saw.
Roxas was leaning back in his chair, feet propped up on a computer consol, and idly tossing a white keyblade and catching it as if it were a rubber ball. Roxas turned his head, meeting the bandaged man's terror-stricken face, a small smile playing out on his lips. "Hi, I think we need to talk."
DIZ couldn't move, couldn't speak, eyes widening in shock, not even realizing as the coffee cup slipped from his fingers, crashing to the ground and shattering into small pieces. Coffee splashed at his feet.
"Here's how it's going to work." Roxas continued as if him sitting there was an everyday occurrence. "You are going to stand there. You are not going to move. I'm going to ask some questions and you are going to answer them or I'll kill you." The blonde's voice was eerily clam but there was a hidden edge to it.
DIZ inhaled, trying to will the initial shock and panic away. The bandaged man was very rational and able to keep his head in the most desperate situations, he could deal with Roxas, even knew he would have to confront the blonde eventually, planning to do it inside the simulation. However, this was far from anything DIZ had counted on. Roxas was not bound by any boundaries or limits, could do whatever he pleased, and was holding a deadly weapon from across the room.
DIZ took in the blonde's appearance, black robe splattered with blood and there was a brown crust on his face the cloaked man couldn't identify. When DIZ spoke, his voice came out slightly shaky, saying the first thing that came to mind. "Where's Riku?"
"I didn't say you could talk" Roxas said seemly annoyed but the blonde then paused, smirked, and answered DIZ anyway. "But if you're talking about your dog he's been shot."
The last bit of hope DIZ was holding onto instantly vanished, feeling his heart plummet and his blood run cold. "You killed-"
"No!" Roxas said so severely that DIZ was partially surprised by the reaction. "I didn't kill him. He was the one who attacked me. I was only defending myself but when I left, he was near dead. He's probably a heartless by now."
DIZ was about to open his mouth to reply when Roxas leaned forward in the computer chair. "Don't ask anything else. Now it's your turn to answer me."
DIZ gave a curt nod. He had to stay in control. This situation was delicate and DIZ could not afford to make a mistake, he was a well-accomplished scientist and Roxas was nothing more then a recently born nobody. There was still a chance DIZ could make him see reason. "Alright, ask me whatever you want and I will answer to the best of my knowledge" DIZ was relieved when his voice came out steady and in his familiar arid and deep tone.
Roxas looked satisfied and sat back. "Good, why did you send your dog to hunt me down? What did you want me for?"
"We needed you to awaken the keyblade master"
"How? What do you mean awaken?" The blonde asked sharply.
"The keyblade master is asleep. Or in a catatonic state if, you will. The only chance he has is for you to complete him by merging with him."
Roxas blinked, looking interested. "You want me to merge with him?"
"Yes, that is the only way."
"What happens to me if I do?"
DIZ hesitated for a moment, face turning uneasy before he quickly schooled his features back to their placid expression, grateful Roxas would not have detected his moment of insecurity because of the think wrappings covering his face, breathing in deeply, his words came out detached. "Then you will lose your will, your conscience, and everything that you are. It will be as if you never existed."
"Like death?"
"Yes"
"What makes you think I would do that?" Roxas's voice was hard but there was also an undertone of curiosity.
"Because you were never supposed to exist. You are nothing, a mistake. The only way you can amount to anything is by giving yourself over. That is your destiny."
"You know" Roxas said tossing Oathkeeper before catching it. "I think you're forgetting who has the power right now. And Xemnas thinks you're a liability by the way."
"Xemnas" DIZ said slowly "Yes, somehow I don't doubt that. However, I can assure you whatever feelings he has for me are mutual."
"Sure, I'll tell him that if I ever see him again."
DIZ looked at Roxas skeptically. "Do you even know what you have gotten yourself into with the organization Roxas? Do you know what happened between my one time apprentice and myself? Why the organization was formed in the first place?"
Roxas shrugged. "No, but then I don't care either. Besides, I'm past the organization. I came here because of my other."
"Alright…" The bandaged man answered.
Roxas fell silent for a moment, gathering his thoughts before he continued. "You obliviously knew I would not be willing to surrender myself for him, so what was your plan to make me go through with it?"
DIZ replied without even a pause, direct and brutally honest. "After Riku brought you here, I was going to put you inside a simulation of a virtual Twilight Town. All of your memories would have been erased and manipulated. It would have felt as if you were living a normal life. Then slowly and with the help of Naminé, you would remember the past experiences of the keyblade master, restoring his memories in the process. Eventually, you would awaken from the simulation and meet the keyblade master. By then there would be little choice but for you to complete him."
A vague smile crossed the blonde's lips "But things didn't go according to your plans"
"That is apparent" DIZ drawled.
"So if the dog dragged me back here" Roxas said dangerously. "I would be…what? In your lab with a whole bunch of wires hooked to my head, living a false reality?"
"Yes, that's the crude but basic concept."
The blonde looked at DIZ challenging, his hand unconsciously tightening on the keyblade. "You're. Insane."
"So I've been told"
Roxas hopped off the computer chair, tailing Oathkeeper over the numerous computer screens. The sharp keyblade scratched into the glass with a high-pitched whine before the blonde ran it over the console and the main keyboards. "Want to know what I think of your idea?"
DIZ remained motionless from his place at the door, not bothering to answer the question, having a sinking suspicion about what Roxas was going to do, he evenly met the blonde's poisonous glare.
With out warning Roxas thrust the keyblade into the main computer screen. There was the droning of electricity before Roxas hit it again and the computer burst forth into a shower of bright turquoise and yellow sparks. The blonde did not relent. In unrestrained frustration and rage, he brought the keyblade down over and over again onto the pulsating computers. Thick glass broke, shards of it flying at the walls, consoles and keyboards shattered, crashing to the floor, making the room vibrate with heated blue electricity. Broken pieces of plastic and metal ignited into small and intense azure flames, everything indistinguishable and scattered across the floor.
DIZ could only watch while his months of hard work were destroyed in a matter of seconds. Every time the keyblade hit DIZ winced as if he was the one that had been struck. The bandaged man couldn't afford to start over, knew there'd be no picking up the pieces after this. Everything he'd rebuilt since the organization was formed was being obliterated right in front his eyes. His mind screamed at him to take action, muscles twitching with anxiety but he didn't try to interfere, knowing he was powerless against the blonde and it would only do more harm then good. The cloaked man stayed unmoving, not even a flicker of his inner turmoil reaching his eyes.
"That's what I think." Roxas said when he finally stilled the keyblade, voice raspy and shoulders hitching with minor strain.
Roxas walked the short distance over to the doorway, stopping to where he was standing a few feet in front of DIZ. "I'm through talking to you. Get out of the way."
In opposition, DIZ dug his fingers tightly into the hard gray doorframe and braced himself. "What do you want Roxas?"
The blonde looked at him unconcerned. "I want to see my other."
"Why!?" DIZ nearly shouted, built up distress and irritation at last starting to show through his voice. "What could you want with him? He cannot respond to you. What is the point?"
"That's not for you to worry about."
"Tell me" DIZ insisted. "You've already made it clear you don't intend to awaken him. Are you planning to cut out his heart and put it in your own chest?"
DIZ realized he struck a nerve when Roxas glanced cuttingly up at him "Move. I won't say it again"
"Listen to me Roxas!" DIZ said in an unwavering effort to make the blonde see reason. "If you don't awaken him the worlds will fall apart and the whole universe will be consumed by the heartless. Without the keyblade master, we have maybe another two or three more years before we all will perish. You know you have to do this. It is your fate. Your destiny. You are a nobody. No matter how hard you try you can't run from that"
"Well, I think you're just a crazy old man and neither option appeals to me really."
"You know I speak the truth but I can no longer force you to make the decision. It is yours alone. Make the right one."
"The way I see it I lose out either way. It I don't merge with him then at least I stay myself a little longer so that is what I choose."
"I can't believe you would be so vindictive as to let all of the worlds die for your own selfishness."
Roxas took a step closer. "It's not selfish. It's wanting to stay alive. I feel pain. I have my own desires and thoughts. My other may have created me but I'm going to fix what he has done. I'm going to make it so that there is only one of us just not in the way you intended. Then no one, especially someone like you will ever threaten my existence again!"
DIZ felt his body stiffen in disbelief, his fingers tightening further on the doorframe. "I will not allow for you to harm the keyblade master." He said as if he were stating a simple fact.
Roxas moved closer still. "In your own words, I don't think you have much of a choice."
"I had my doubts about putting you in the simulation. Even though you are nobody I kept wondering, what your feelings may be. Sometimes I debated if what I was doing was right. I see now that was a grave mistake."
The blonde's eyes flashed. "That was the wrong thing to say."
Roxas lashed out at the cloaked man's face and brought the keyblade down onto the back of his head, the blow taking place in a fraction of a second before DIZ even had a chance to process it. Roxas stepped back with the keyblade over his shoulder and DIZ instinctively placed a hand to the back of his head, feeling his torn facemask, his hand coming back covered in blood. DIZ quickly feeling his vision dim looked into the blonde's face, seeing Roxas's expression was an unusual mixture of rebelliousness and arrogance. DIZ fell forward, his body hitting the floor with a heavy thud.
Roxas exited the room.
0o0o0o0
Axel did not know how long he'd been waiting outside the old man's lab. Roxas had been gone for a while and the blonde was definitely taking his sweet time. Axel went from grinding his teeth to tapping his fingers against the wall. Now he was flat out pacing.
Once they knew where to look, Twilight Town, the mansion, and the lab were all exceptionally easy to find. After the whole ordeal with Riku and leaving The World That Never Was, Axel and Roxas had barely spoken a word to each other, Roxas leading them to Twilight Town and Axel following without comment like the wonderful best friend he was.
It was only after they arrived and were standing right outside their destination that Axel broke the silence. "Whatever your planning just get it over with. I don't want to see it. I'll be here when you're done."
In response, Roxas glanced up at him for a moment, giving a sharp nod before disappearing inside. That had then ended their one sided conversation, short and to the point.
Axel was continuing to pace, taking quicker strides, several questions burning in the back of his mind. Upon entering Twilight Town, more questions kept forming and his doubts about this whole situation were growing stronger. Axel didn't voice them, mostly because he didn't want to. The redhead didn't fully know why Roxas was so intent on confronting DIZ and meeting Sora but he could understand the temptation, particularly considering how unique Roxas was. The blonde did have the keyblade master as his other. Sora, or rather what Sora could accomplish was critical to the organization and Xemnas especially but Roxas wasn't concerened with that, wanting something personal.
Axel did have to admit if he was the one with the other he would be insanely captivated with the idea but somehow Axel didn't think Roxas was doing this out of ordinary curiosity. Axel did have some thoughts but the best one he could come up with was violent and very dark. Honestly, he didn't want to think about it.
Axel's conscience was starting to creep up on him as his thoughts kept coming back to Riku. When he first saw the silver haired teen, dragging Roxas away limp and bloody, all Axel felt was uncontrolled fury. No one dared to hurt Roxas and take the blonde away from him, his only source of feeling. He'd been angry enough to force a chakram through the other's stomach. Then when Roxas woke up and basically tortured Riku, Axel's anger faded. The redhead was reminded of the replica. It fought to stay alive, to become real but its eyes were always dead, remembered Sora's drive to save it, thinking it was the real Riku. Axel then felt only numb. The image of the silver haired teen lying in the rain, with his throat silt, and choking on his own blood kept repeating in his mind.
Axel felt an increasing desire to go back for Riku, even debated on leaving right now and abandoning Roxas to his own devices, knew he should have but he didn't think it would make much of a difference. By the time the redhead was able to get back to where Riku was, he was sure there would be nothing left. That was even considering if he could find the place again. Still if nothing else, it would ease his conscience.
It was hard for Axel to believe how much everything had changed in not even a day, going from his normal yet unplanned life as the organization's number eight to nearly loosing his best friend and turning traitor by following him. Axel wished things could be like they were before, when Roxas first joined Organization XIII, at first being clueless to their world and the blonde despite his best efforts sometimes slipped up. Roxas could also say the most strangest and random things that would get the redhead to smile.
A time back when all the organization members were still alive and Castle Oblivion was supposed to serve more as a far away home then a killing ground. Axel had been the only one to make it out of that blasted place, surviving the murder and the betrayal, by not choosing sides and fighting for himself. The redhead killed Vexen without much of a second thought, never really liked him in the first place and then the scientist created the replica. For a nobody to give life to something else was beyond crossing the line and Vexen unsurprisingly couldn't control it. Vexen was a liability and would bring everything down, so when Marluxia told Axel to kill him, the redhead did so but he hadn't stopped there, later convincing the Riku replica to kill Zexion and watching uncaringly as it happened.
Then Larxene along with Marluxia turned traitor by trying to use Sora to overthrow the organization. Axel had put a stop to it, released Naminé, and confronted Marluxia, only Marluxia used Naminé as a shield against him. Axel would have gone through her, to much was riding on Marluxia's death regardless of what happened to Naminé but Sora had been watching. Once again, Axel found himself fighting Sora. Sora with the blue eyes that reminded him so much of Roxas. In the end, Axel faked his own death and had just gotten out alive, explained most of what happened to Xemnas with a few twists and the white haired leader accepted Axel back.
Larxene was something Axel regretted. She didn't need to die. Her plans failed but Axel would have been willing to lie for her even if he doubted Xemnas would accept the story. Larxene probably realized she was finished no matter what she did. In a last desperate effort, she attacked Sora. She lost her life.
Roxas had changed around that time, finding he could summon duel keyblades and the reason he couldn't remember his death was because his other was still alive. Axel's blonde friend dug deeper then any of others dared and would contemplate their existence to all hours of the night. His face lost its energy and distant humor, becoming haunted, intense blue eyes lost their liveliness, turning unresponsive and detached.
A part of Axel wanted to tell Roxas to get over it. They were all nobodies and even if Roxas was special, they were all in the same boat, dead in a sense but Roxas failed to acknowledge it. Everyone else had, even if Xemnas was trying to change it. Axel wanted to voice his opinion to the blonde but he was never able to. All it took was one look into his friend's face and Axel knew he would do anything to help him so instead, Axel listened intently to every word Roxas said, doing his best to respond and reassure him, never once complaining when Roxas robbed him of much needed sleep. There were many nights Roxas would sit in Axel's room, to talk or just stare unseeingly at the walls.
Axel was drug out from his recollection by the sound of rushing air and he quickly jolted his head forward to see the swirling purple and black of a portal. Feeling a surge of panic, he immediacy drew out his chakrams in preparation for a fight. He didn't think it had been enough time for one the organization members to find them yet but Axel didn't know of anyone else it could be.
The portal closed and out of it stepped a familiar blonde haired girl. Axel was more then surprised and a bit taken back to see Naminé standing in front of him. He didn't know what happened to the girl after Castle Oblivion and the last time they met hadn't been under the best of circumstances. Axel never really expected to see her again. Like the keyblade master Naminé had seemed to vanish off the face of the earth. However, Axel couldn't help his relived sigh, realizing there was on threat.
Naminé was looking up at him, blinking almost owlishly with confusion evident on her face. "Axel?"
"Hey Naminé. Long time no see," He returned casually.
Naminé tilted her head slightly as if she was studying him. Her perplexed expression only deepened. "What…what are you… doing here?"
"I could ask you the same thing."
Naminé looked down to the ground and started to absently pick at one of her fingernails. "I was…that is….I was helping DIZ and Riku with…" The blonde's voice was coming out shakier with every word she spoke and she was continuing to fidget.
Axel turned his face away from her, crossing his arms, and letting his back lean against the entrance to the lab, glancing at her through the corner of his eyes. "It's alright. You don't have to say anything else."
Naminé looked back up at him. "Alright…"
"So, you've been here all this time? Protecting the keyblade master huh?"
"Yes"
"That seems fitting somehow."
"Axel…What happened?" Naminé asked softly.
"I wish I knew, I've been trying to figure that out myself all day."
"Something went wrong didn't it. That's why you're here. Something happened to Riku." The blonde's voice was laced with fear and apprehension.
Axel turned his head so he was looking fully at her, feeling regret staring into her worried eyes. When Axel helped Naminé escape from her room in Castle Oblivion, she was distressed and torn. He had watched as she ran to her newly opened door, like she was clawing her way out of a grave, the concept of freedom shinning through her face, almost too much for her. Axel had told her to do what she thought was right and Naminé listened, went with her non-existent heart, and helped Sora. Axel was now feeling very contradictory, standing here ignoring his gut instinct to intervene with whatever Roxas was doing. "Yeah, something happened." He said slowly. "Look Naminé, Roxas is inside. I know you don't really know him but I think you should go talk to him. You might have better luck then I did."
"I will" Naminé said, nodding eagerly, quickly running to the front of the lab but before she was about to enter she glanced back at Axel. "What about you?"
Axel stepped away from the wall and walked forward a few feet, stretching his arms over his head and calling forth a portal at the same time. "I'm going back for Riku. Tell Roxas to wait up for me alright? I shouldn't be gone long"
Naminé gave him a brief smile before she disappeared inside the lab. Axel not wanting to waste any more time, followed suit and let the portal close around him as he vanished back to The World That Never Was.
0o0o0o0
Roxas stood in front of Sora's egg shaped sleeping chamber. He'd spent months of hearing about the magnificent, do no wrong, and heroic keyblade master, had spent countless days in turmoil and wonder about him. After so long, he was finally here. Ever since he learned he was different and that he could wield keyblades, he'd thought about and envisioned meeting his other many times, risking everything to find him.
Xemnas told him once that above all else he was never to come into contact with the keyblade master, saying it was highly dangerous but never elaborating on why. Roxas now knew the reasoning behind it. If the two of them merged together, Sora would be complete and that could potentially destroy all of the organization. Roxas couldn't say much to that, he was here never being that great at listening but then Xemnas was the one who told him about Sora in the first place. Right after Castle Oblivion, the head of the organization gave him just enough information to leave him hungry for more, to seek his other out. Xemnas was contradictory and it was confusing. Roxas shook his head, pushing the thoughts from his mind, it wasn't important anymore.
Seeing Sora like this wasn't at all what Roxas anticipated. The blonde had thought they would be able to talk to each other, fight if need be, and Roxas would learn the secrets. Instead, it was like Sora was in a coma, vulnerable and unaware. It left Roxas feeling disappointed like all he'd done had been for nothing. The only thing he could do was stand in a pure white room and watch Sora breath. Then he never foresaw that DIZ would try to make them merge together either.
He and Sora didn't look much alike but Roxas felt as if he was looking into a mirror and seeing another side of himself. There was also a strange sense of detachment. Roxas could feel a pull at the center of his stomach, becoming stronger with every moment he waited, and could feel something in his mind gently whispering and beckoning him to move closer, making him feel hazy as if he wasn't all there but there was something else, screaming at him to resist, to stay away, knowing that if he did, if he came closer, he'd lose himself.
Then Roxas felt a warm sensation form from behind his eyes, traveling down his arms and neck. It was overwhelming, making his every nerve sear with white heat and taking root inside his skull. Roxas felt as if his mind was being split open but there was no pain only the rising heat. He heard an unknown yet oddly familiar voice echo from somewhere inside him. I've been having these strange thoughts lately. Like is any of this for real or not? Then came the fragmented memories, flashing before his eyes.
He was laying stretched out on the beach. There was soft sand at his back and a cool surf at his feet, a redheaded girl was standing over him, looking down into his face. "C'mon get up Sora! You lazy bum!"
He was running through the sand, trying to catch up to a silver haired boy who was a few feet in front of him but he wasn't having much luck. The boy turned his head to smirk at him. "Giving up already?"
He was on the beach again, only this time he was sitting on an awkwardly bent tree. The boy and the girl were with him, all three of them looking out to sea and watching the setting sun. The silver haired boy seemed troubled by something, having a far away expression in his eyes. "If there are any other worlds out there, why did we end up on this one?"
He was in a small cave, alone and looking at a rough drawing on a rocky wall, a cold and deep voice echoed out of nowhere. "This world has been connected. "
He stood up, visibly startled, whipping his head around, he could not find the source of whoever had spoken. "Who-who's there?"
The voice came again. "Tied to the darkness"
He was sitting on a dock with the redheaded girl. It was nearing the end of another day and they were watching the ocean. Everything around them was cast in deep orange, yellow, and red. The girl stood, turning to him. "Sora, don't ever change. "
It was night. The silver haired boy was standing in front of him with his hand outstretched. A dark puddle formed under the boy's feet, darkness coming to lick at his legs and pull him down but he looked unafraid. "The door has opened" The boy said with confidence.
He didn't understand what the boy meant but knew he had to get to him somehow and reached for his hand but wasn't quite able to make their fingers touch.
He was in the cave again. The redheaded girl was staring at a wall where a looked door was imbedded in rock. She turned her head to him. Something was wrong, her face blank, eyes glazed over. "So..ra…"
The door suddenly flew open. There was a gush of powerful wind and the girl was thrown backwards. He opened his arms to catch her but her body passed right through him. She vanished.
The cold and deep voice came back. "You understand nothing."
Roxas fell to his knees, clutching his head. Those weren't his memories. They couldn't possibly be. They belonged to Sora and Roxas didn't want any part in them. Sora was born in light, growing up on a tropical beach and spending his days swimming and playing in the sun. There were people that cared about him. He had two best friends that he would go to the end of the world to find and in return, his best friends wouldn't even hesitate to do the same for him. Sora had feelings, emotions, glory, a hero's life, and importance. Sora possessed a heart.
Roxas didn't have anything. He may have been born into Twilight Town but his first memories were of darkness, rain, and a cold street. He was alone from the first moment he opened his eyes, had been alive for hardly a year but in that short time, he'd seen blood and death, heard the screams of heartless, learned to fight with deadly blades, killed to survive. Roxas was told he didn't have emotions, that he wasn't supposed to have a soul only an all-consuming instinct to stay alive.
Sora had inadvertently created him. Roxas went through all this because of Sora, existed because of Sora. Everything that happened, always came back to the keyblade master. Sora had everything when Roxas had nothing. Roxas hated him.
Roxas picked himself up from off the floor, the burning feeling completely gone. He could still feel the pulling sensation but it was dimming. The blonde would finish this and as he told DIZ, would make it so there was only one of them, like there should have been in the first place. Roxas would be the real one, knew there had to be more to life then simply existing. He wasn't something that could just be forgotten about, would not allow himself to fade away before he even had a chance at life.
"You have no idea what you've put me through do you?" Roxas spoke to Sora. "That's alright I'll fix it."
Even through the hatred Roxas didn't want Sora to die, he never did but what DIZ said frightened him and Roxas wasn't thinking clearly, functioning completely on fear and paranoia, since somewhere he knew every word DIZ spoke was right. After so long he had an answer, to be complete he would have to merge with Sora but his other didn't need him to live. Sora spent over a year with out him, continued on his journey, made it though Castle Oblivion, probably hadn't realized there was anything missing. Fate was cruel and now neither one of them could exist at the same time, would never be able to again and Roxas almost wanted to give in to the pulling, to the feeling of being whole, let himself cease to exist.
There was only one thing to do, destroy the temptation before he had the chance to follow through with it and if he didn't do this, if he left Sora like this, he knew that he would eventually because it was inevitable. But now it would be so easy just to end it all, end everything, the sleepless nights, the torment, the emptiness, and the wondering. All it would take was one blow to crack the skull, to bash in the defenseless and sleeping face. It would be over in seconds and he would never have to go through any of this again. Roxas reached Sora, lifting the keyblade above his shoulder.
"Roxas!" His name was screamed piercingly and someone was frantically running toward him. Roxas didn't look away but felt a rush of air before there was suddenly a blonde haired girl between him and the pod, her arms outstretched, standing protectively in front of Sora. Her sapphire eyes glistening wetly but looking up at him unwavering.
She shook her head in denial, her voice tear stained and airy. "Roxas no you can't do this. You'll be lost forever. Please Roxas. Please don't be lost. You can't. No…no…no"
It then dawned on Roxas who this girl was. She was Naminé from the tower, the witch, a nobody among nobodies. Naminé had the power to erase and manipulate memories, could strip down a person's identity and enslave their mind at will, was the girl Vexen experimented with and Marluxia talked about. She'd been locked inside a white room and used by the organization in an attempt to control Sora. Roxas had never seen her before but he'd heard enough about her. Naminé was also said to have disappeared. Roxas hadn't really paid attention to story but the organization was obliviously mistaken.
Then there was something else about her. Roxas felt a connection to her as if he should know her somehow, almost like what he felt with Riku but stronger. Roxas didn't understand the feeling and he didn't like it.
"You're Naminé," He stated.
The blonde haired girl continued to shake her head as if she hadn't heard him. "Please Roxas. You can't do this. Please"
"What are you doing here?" Roxas tried again.
Naminé stilled herself, looking down to the floor but she didn't answer. Roxas soon realized she had no intention too. She stayed silent seeming guilty.
Something DIZ said came back to him, with the help of Naminé. Roxas felt his annoyance build. "Did you know what DIZ and Riku were planning to do to me?"
"Yes" Naminé whispered without looking up.
"You were helping them. Weren't you?" Roxas's voice came out harsher then he meant it too. Even though this was the first time he'd ever seen Naminé, he felt oddly betrayed.
Naminé glanced back up at him with startling honesty shinning through her eyes. "No! I was going to help you"
Roxas didn't know how to reply to that so he didn't even try. There was silence for a few seconds before he spoke, calmly but deadly. "Get out of the way Naminé"
"Roxas I didn't agree with what DIZ and Riku were doing but I can't let you do this!"
Roxas tightened his grip on the keyblade. "You think you can stop me?"
Naminé took a couple of steps backwards so she was shielding Sora more with her body, arms still outstretched. "No, but I couldn't live with myself for not tying. To get to him you'll have to go through me."
Roxas advanced towards her, the keyblade glinting and threatening over his shoulder. "This is your last chance."
Naminé stood her ground, her face hardening. "Then what are you going to do Roxas? Kill me too!?"
Roxas reached out his free arm and wrapped his hand around one of her small wrists, pulling her towards him. "No, there's no reason too."
Naminé flinched in surprise and tried to wrench her wrist back. "Let go! Let go!"
Roxas did not relent and Naminé pushed at his shoulder, digging her feet into the ground, struggling madly to free herself, her efforts in vain, as Roxas easily dragged her in front of him until their foreheads were nearly touching. "Besides we are already dead remember?" He whispered into her ear, his breath moving a few strands of pale blonde hair.
With a quick jerk of his arm, Roxas threw her slight body away from him. He heard Naminé hit the floor from somewhere far off but he didn't turn away to see where. With no more distractions between him and Sora, he raised the keyblade for the final time.
"Roxas…" It was Naminé, her voice wavering and faint.
Roxas quickly glanced over his shoulder. Naminé was sprawled out on the floor by a far wall, holding herself up with her forearms, twin streaks of tears running down her face, and staring directly at him. She shook her head. "Roxas…no…"
Roxas turned back to Sora and ignored her, the keyblade over his head, poised and ready to strike. He swung it forward but it only descended a couple of inches before he abruptly stopped.
Roxas gazed into Sora's still face. The keyblade master's eyes were closed peacefully and spiky dark brown hair brushed slightly against his flushed cheeks, face looking almost delicate, and his body limp and suspended inside the pod. Sora looked so alive, as if he could wake up at any moment, as if he was just waiting for something. Roxas knew exactly what that something was. The blonde felt the pulling sensation start to take effect again, making him feel light headed with bliss and his stomach churn at the same time. His hands shook on the keyblade.
Roxas knew if he did this, he would be destroying apart of himself, had told himself he didn't care. Whatever happened to him afterwards was trivial as long at the threat was gone. Now moments away from accomplishing his goal Roxas realized he couldn't go through with it. He could feel himself inside Sora and running through Sora there were emotions Roxas only half experienced before; hope, strength, pain, fear, and desperation, everything bleeding together until Roxas couldn't tell where he ended and where Sora began. Roxas was hardly able to breathe.
The blonde shut his eyes and clenched his teeth. He brought the keyblade down to the flimsy surface of the pod but instead of bringing it onto his other's head, Roxas threw it harshly to the side where it bounced off a far wall with a ringing chime and fell harmlessly to floor. All Roxas could do was stand with his eyes closed while breathing hard, feeling frustration, anger, and another emotion that he couldn't identify. He formed his hands into fists, trying to force the feelings back, only wanting everything over with.
From the side Naminé picked herself up from off the floor and stood shakily to her feet. Roxas could hear her stumbling before she broke into a half pained run. From the corner of his eyes, he watched as she came towards him, not knowing what she was intending but not trying to move out of her way, stunned when she collided with his back, her sudden weight against him making him involuntary step forward. He felt one of her arms encircle his waist and her other come across his chest, fisting her hands in his blood stained robe as she hugged him from behind, pressing her forehead against his shoulder blade and Roxas could feel her trembling as her body shook with sobs. She was saying something but her voice was so low and jumbled, Roxas couldn't make it out.
Roxas didn't know how to react. No one had ever touched him like this before and he felt uncomfortable in her hold. His body was ridged but Naminé didn't seem to notice, her arms tightening even further around him, quickly seeming to calm down and he could vaguely hear her words, muffled against his shoulder, her voice wavering. "I knew you couldn't do it Roxas…I knew it…I knew it."
Roxas wondered why he didn't push her away, wasn't sure if he even wanted to. His body was starting to relax against her. It was almost nice in a way. All he wanted to do was focus on breathing.
Naminé spoke again, stronger this time. "I know it hurts. I know how alone you feel but it will be alright. You'll see everything will be all right."
Roxas didn't understand what she meant. Nothing could be all right. "How?"
"You can join with Sora and be complete. You'll live through Sora, be able to feel all of his emotions. You'll never be alone again. Sora will make everything right."
Roxas felt an icy grip where his heart should be, feeling deceived, Naminé's words stinging and cutting. Wrenching himself out of her arms, he spun her angrily so they were face to face, tightly gripping her upper arms. "No! I'm not going to merge with him. I won't let myself fade away. Especially for him. I won't! I won't!"
Naminé looked at him out of hollowed eyes, reaching a hand towards his face. "Roxas…Please you're only denying it. We both know you have to do this."
Roxas pushed her away and Naminé stumbled backwards as he fell to his knees, clutching his shoulders. Everything from this day was starting to take its toll on him; the fighting, the blood, and meeting his other. He was tired of it all and Naminé was only confirming what he already knew. "I won't let myself die" Roxas breathed. "I can't"
Naminé walked back over to him, kneeling beside him out of understanding, close with out touching. She didn't say anything. There was no need too.
It was then the door opened and Axel entered, taking in the scene, letting his eyes run over the three egg shaped sleeping chambers and then to Roxas and Naminé kneeled on the floor. "What…?"
Axel didn't have time to finish as Roxas rose quickly to his feet, broke into a run and pushed callously past him, running outside the white room. Axel glanced after his friend and then back to Naminé. "I have the feeling I just missed something."
Naminé looked up at him. "Did you find Riku?" she asked hopefully.
A fleeting look of distress passed over Axel's face before he answered. "Sorry, I went back but there was nothing there. I'm not sure what happened. It's like he vanished or something…" Axel trailed off looking back in the direction Roxas had gone.
"Oh" Naminé said, placing her hands in her lap and looking miserable. She glanced at Axel, meeting his dark green eyes. "I think things are going to get a lot worse before they get better. You should go after him."
"Yeah, I would stay and ask if you were okay and all that but…"
"I know"
Axel sighed finally giving into his building unease. "Roxas!" he called before he chased after his friend.
Axel didn't have to search very long for Roxas, finding him in a long hallway right outside Sora's room, kneeling again with his hands over his shoulders, his head lowered toward the ground, and breathing strangely as if he couldn't get enough air into his lungs. Axel walked over, sitting down beside him. "I'm guessing whatever happened. You couldn't go through with it?"
Roxas didn't seem to hear. There was silence for a moment and Axel didn't push the question. Then Roxas suddenly spoke, voice strained and boarding with a mixture of rage and pain. "I hate him Axel. I hate him so much."
"Hate who? Sora?"
Roxas only curled into himself more as he nodded shakily.
Axel leaned forward, placing a hand on Roxas's back, feeling him shuddering, and began to rub soothing circles, doing his best to calm the blonde. "Are you alright?"
Roxas came out of whatever phase he'd been in, straightening himself and hitting Axel's hand away almost violently. "Don't touch me!"
Axel hastily sat back, holding his hands out in front of him. "Right, Sorry just stop with the dramatics already. You're starting to scare me." He said with a slight trace of playful taunting.
Roxas sighed leaning back against the wall and staring up at the blue-gray ceiling. "Yeah"
"So what did DIZ want with you anyway?"
Roxas was silent, looking as if he was debating on answering before giving in. "He wanted me to merge with Sora"
"Merge with him?" Axel asked skeptically.
"Yeah, we would become one so Sora could awaken. Then he could go play hero and everything." Roxas said with a minor sarcastic tone.
Axel blinked taking in the information, looking like he was seriously considering the idea before his expression quickly changed into anger. "That is the most crazy thing… You told him off didn't you?"
Roxas glared
Axel smiled. "Right, Good."
The blonde stood up from his position by the wall and quickly began to make his way out of the lab. Axel watched for a moment before standing up as well. "So" Axel said to no one in particular. "It looks like we're playing another game of follow the leader."
0o0o0o0
Axel found himself once again waiting outside for Roxas. They were in Twilight Town and Axel was leaning against a brick wall outside of some gift shop while Roxas was inside using the bathroom. Axel had peeled off his gloves some time ago but they were still both dressed in Organization XIII attire and he wondered what the poor employee must have thought when Roxas walked in with his blood stained robe. Luckily, it was very late and Twilight Town seemed practically deserted. This shop had been one of the few places actually still opened. Axel tapped the back of his heel against the wall in boredom before he heard a bell chime and the shop door come open. Axel looked up as Roxas walked out.
The blonde had taken off his cloak and it was now hanging over his shoulder, leaving Roxas in only dark blue jeans and a thin white T-shirt. The jeans were frayed and stained with black splotches from grime and blood. The T-shirt was cut and ripped from where the keyblade had sliced through his cloak and the cotton was tainted pink in places. Roxas had washed his face and arms, removing most of the dried blood, his hair still slightly damp. Various shallow and deep scratches ran up and down his arms, there was a vivid black bruise around his right wrist and a varying degree of purple and black bruises around his neck that stood out plain against the white turned pink T-shirt.
"Don't you look great." Axel commented.
Roxas stepped over to Axel and leaned against the wall beside him. "Yeah, well you betray the organization, fight an army of heartless, battle and lose to a dog, and meet your other all in one day. Then lets see how good you come out of it."
Axel suppressed a laugh. "Point taken. Wait a dog?"
"Riku"
"Right"
There was comfortable silence for a minute, both Axel and Roxas lost in their own thoughts from the past few hours. Then Axel broke it with a casual air to his voice. "You know I fought with Sora in Castle Oblivion. I spoke with him too."
Roxas turned his head, looking intently at Axel. "What was he like?"
"Happy, optimistic. Your complete and polar opposite."
Roxas shrugged. "That makes sense he is my other."
Axel lifted a hand to his chin and his eyes crinkled at the edges, seeming deep in thought, when he spoke again, his voice came out subdued. "There was one thing you had in common. You fight the same. You both have this undefeated look in your eyes. It's so similar it's scary. I would hate to see what would happen if you two ever fought each other"
"Like that can happen now" Roxas said bitterly.
Axel put his hands behind his head and sighed. "What are you going to do now Roxas?"
Roxas's expression was blank as if he hadn't thought of the question. There was a long pause before he answered. "What would you say if I wanted to lay low for a bit, have an attempt at a normal life?"
Axel tilted his head to get a better look at the blonde. "You're serious? I would say you're almost as crazy as DIZ. You and normal don't go together."
"I figure I could stay here at Twilight Town." Roxas continued, not rising to Axel's last comment. "It's as good a place to start as any and if the organization makes a move I'd most likely know about it since I'd be close to Sora."
Axel looked at him uncertainly. "You are serious?"
"I know I don't have much of a life Axel. It's only a half existence but it's all I have. I want to live it. I'm not ready to let it go."
Axel put his hands back out in front of him and crossed his arms. "Right I know the feeling. Okay then, I'm up for that. Lets stay at Twilight Town."
"Alone, there's no reason for us both to leave the organization" Roxas said with an undertone of irritation in his voice.
"The organization can go screw themselves. They come second. I made my choice when I followed you. I want to stay with you."
"Well don't, I want you to leave" Roxas snapped.
"Do you even know what you're in for Roxas?" The redhead asked unaffected by his friend's rapid change in attitude. "You've only known the organization. You can't remember anything of your past life. You have no idea how to survive out here."
Roxas glared. "I don't need to be protected! I made it in Organization XIII. I'll make it here."
Axel found his voice rising despite his best effort to control it. "You can't just decide to quit the organization and drop off the face of the earth, then start a new life and just do it!"
"I just did." Roxas said. The blonde's voice was chipped and evenly matched Axels'. "This is what I want to do. I want my own life and you're not in it. Nothing from the organization is. I never wanted you here in the first place just like I never wanted to be your friend. Get. Lost. Got it memorized?"
This wasn't the first time Roxas had said something like that to Axel. Roxas was used to pushing Axel away. The redhead usually laughed it off or disregarded it completely. The blonde would push even harder and Axel would push back. It was how their friendship started. Only this time Axel was deeply scowling at him, clenching his hands with his fingernails digging into his palms hard enough to draw blood. Roxas realized he'd just went to far.
Axel angrily rose a fist and viciously hit the brick wall between them, his glove coming back torn, his knuckles scraped and raw. "After all I went through for you, I'm so sick of the way you're treating me. This is why you're always going to end up alone!'
Roxas turned his head away saying nothing. He wanted Axel to leave, it had been partly why he said that. Now that it was over the blonde wasn't sure if he regretted his words or not. He had no desire to try to resolve the situation. Instead, Roxas waited for the sound of Axel's retreating footsteps, dreading the sound and welcoming it at the same time. Half of him wanted Axel to be gone and have it done with but the other half still wanted the sense of normalcy Axel gave him. The feeling was strange. However, the redhead remained standing where he was and there was only uneasy silence between the two of them.
"I'm sorry," Axel finally said, his voice back to normal but sounding empty. " I shouldn't have said that. You're sure this is what you want?"
Roxas looked back at him with mild relief. "Yes, for now at least"
Axel reached into his robe and pulled out a small black pouch, reaching over he grabbed Roxas's wrist, placing it in his hand before quickly releasing him. "Here, it's all I have but it should last you for a little while."
The pouch felt smooth and velvety on Roxas's fingers. The blonde raised it in front of his face, dangling it from a string. "What is it?"
"Munny, folks around here kind of like you to pay for things"
Roxas pocketed the munny bag and glared up at Axel. "Shut up! I knew that. Besides who needs munny when you can just teleport in somewhere and teleport out?"
Axel gave a half grin, the liveliness returning to his eyes. "True, but it's not good to do that so many times. They'll catch on and run you out of town. Believe me I know."
Roxas rolled his eyes. "You would."
Axel leaned away from the wall and flexed his badly stinging hand. "Right, so maybe I'll go back to the Organization. I can keep them off your trail. I don't know how I'm going to explain all this to Xemnas, but hey I'm Axel. I'll think of something."
Roxas met Axel's eyes, a placid expression on the blonde's face. "You'd do that?"
Axel gave a full fledge smile. "Sure, I don't care what you say. You're still my best friend. So I guess this is good bye then?"
"I guess" Roxas said slowly.
Axel placed a hand on Roxas's shoulder. There was an awkward pause then the redhead bent down slightly and leaned forward, not getting very far before Roxas placed a hand between them. "If you're going to hug me I'll break you neck" Roxas said his face looking completely serious.
Axel blinked and leaned back with a thunderstruck expression. "Yeah…"
"I'm kidding Axel." Roxas said suddenly with a slight grin. "I'll break your arm."
Axel allowed himself a smile and laughed heavily, squeezing the blonde's shoulder before letting go. "I'm really going to miss you."
Roxas nodded the grin still on his lips as he watched Axel make his way to the edge of the sidewalk and call fourth a portal. "Hey, don't think this is final. If you need anything at all come find me. Just make sure you stay away from the organization. I'll do whatever I can to help you. Alright? Anything at all. Got it memorized?"
Roxas didn't have time to reply before the portal completely engulfed Axel and the redhead disappeared. Roxas continued to stand against the brick wall, taking him a little while to realize he was completely alone. He no longer belonged to Organization XIII. He was starting a new life and at long last living for himself and not others. There was no immediate danger of dying in Twilight Town. Here, Roxas wasn't a ruthless killer of heartless who could summon keyblades and do the impossible. He was a fifteen-year-old kid, with no place to go and who only had the clothes on his back and the munny Axel had given him. There hadn't been time to take anything from the Castle That Never Was.
Roxas could have stood outside the shop for seconds or hours. He wasn't sure. This new concept burned through his mind and time felt irrelevant. Nothing felt completely real yet. Still if there was one thing Roxas knew he could do it was survive, knowing whatever happened he would make it. The place he ended up in didn't matter.
Roxas sighed, stepping away from the wall. It looked like he was in the main part of Twilight Town, in a plaza with several shops and what looked like a mall on his left. Roxas walked towards the mall, not taking him long to reach it. Roxas saw it was obviously closed but it would be a good idea to stick close by it. Even though he'd never done it before, Roxas needed to go shopping, had to start somewhere and he needed clothes.
Roxas found a small wooden bench directly in front of the mall, seeing it would be a convenient place to spend the remainder of the night, he laid down on it a bit more heavily then he intended to. The bench was hard and uncomfortable pressed against his skin and didn't do much for his aching muscles, being a far cry from his bed in the World That Never Was. Roxas put his arms behind his head, using them as a pillow, the blonde looked up to the sky.
It was hard to tell if it was night or day in Twilight Town since it was always cast in pink, yellow, and orange shadows. The only indication that it was night was the slight darkening of the sky. He wasn't completely unfamiliar with Twilight Town, having been back and fourth on a select few missions, mostly with Axel but still it would take time getting used too.
Roxas felt his eyes growing heavy, shifting he curled onto his side, letting his eyes fall shut, could feel himself quickly drifting off, realizing for the first time how tired he was. His last thought before he was out to the world was that he hoped he didn't dream of Sora.