Notes: I wanted more Axel and Roxas so here's the result I guess. After this chapter I think I have about three or four more chapters left of build up before some action can start happening. Also sorry about Riku he's coming in but it's still not going to be for awhile. Probably not to about chapter 19 or so. Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed especially those who reviewed more then once. You guys are the best!

Chapter 7: Alone

Axel sat across from Xemnas, in the superior's ashen white office. The floor had an interwoven and complex blue-black design on it that reached up the walls and spread across the white covering of the room like cracked ice. There was a dark brown desk between them and besides the floor, it was the only trace of color in the room. Axel had his elbow against the armrest of his chair with his chin resting in the palm of his hand.

Xemnas was hunched over a piece of paper, brow furrowed in concentration, scribbling down something, not bothering to even glance up at Axel. Pages of notes and diagrams were scattered all over his desk.

The room was silent except for the rustling of paper and a faint ticking that sounded like it was coming from a clock but Axel didn't see one anywhere in the room. Board, he shifted his eyes as he tried to locate the source of the noise, coming up with nothing, but unconsciously began drumming his fingers to the steady sound. There was only one other time Axel had been in Xemnas's office. It hadn't been the most pleasant experience and he found the memories rushing back.

0o0o0o0

It was right after Castle Oblivion, when he confronted Marluxia, and fought Sora for the final time. As soon as Axel returned to The Castle That Never Was, his first thought was of Roxas, wanting to see the blonde after he spent such a long period away from him. The time in Castle Oblivion always felt endless and Roxas had been the only thing that kept him going. Axel never really cared about what happened to himself before, his life being empty and dead, nothing. That was where the organization was supposed to come in, to give him an objective, something to reach for even if he highly doubted their sincerity. It was still a distorted reason to live and more then anything Axel wanted to feel alive.

Then when Axel met and had gotten to know Roxas, everything changed. Axel felt like he'd gotten a piece of his life back. For Roxas, Axel knew he had an obligation to see Castle Oblivion through to the end. It was just like he couldn't let Marluxia or any of the others harm that Sora brat. If something happened to Sora, Axel wasn't sure what effect it would have on Roxas but he wasn't willing to find out.

When Axel returned to The World That Never Was, there hadn't been any time to see Roxas, or for anything else. No time to think about the death of the others or to recover from the place he hardly escaped from alive. Instead, Axel found himself in Xemnas's office being harshly grilled for several hours, all the while attending to the bloody gashes that laced his skin and wearing a red tainted and ripped cloak. Marluxia had been surprisingly strong for someone whose ultimate power relied on rose petals. Sora on the other hand was just a lot more trouble then he was worth.

Then the door slammed opened and hit the wall with a loud bang. Roxas was standing in the entryway as if he'd always been there, clenching his teeth and breathing hard.

Axel felt something like a mixture of happiness and concern. He looked toward Xemnas. Barging into the superior's office was something that simply wasn't done but it was Roxas after all. Their white haired leader was glancing at Roxas through the corner of his eyes with a grim expression of mild disinterest on his face. Axel couldn't help his smile as he turned back to look at his angry friend. "Hi Rox, need something?"

Roxas's eyes landed on him and the blonde stalked forward. The next thing Axel knew Roxas had fisted a hand in the front of his cloak and had punched him square in the jaw. Axel could instantly taste the metallic tang in his mouth, grabbing Roxas's arm, he disentangled the blonde's fingers from his robe. "What the hell was that for?!'

Roxas took a couple of steps back, eyes flashing with rage. "There was no word from the castle! After the reports stopped coming no one knew what was happening! I thought you might have been killed!"

For a moment, Axel felt touched. He and the others were supposed to send reports to The Castle That Never Was regularly, but then the betrayal and killing had started and there wasn't time. Everyone back at home would have known something was wrong, that there was some kind of massacre happening, but they wouldn't know who was still alive or dead, leaving Roxas in the dark. Axel wondered what his friend must have gone through while he was gone and he felt suddenly guilty. "It's alright" Axel tried to say reassuringly. "I'm here now and I'm fine. See? Have some faith. You should know it's going to take a lot more then a few traitors to out due me."

Axel wasn't expecting the blank expression in Roxas's eyes. The blonde looked as if he hadn't understood the words. Then Axel saw the sudden realization that flowed through Roxas's face as he narrowed his eyes. "You? This isn't about you!"

"Then what's the reason for all the shouting and storming into the superior's office about then?' Axel asked slightly amused.

"Because you ruined everything!"

Then it all made sense to Axel. Roxas's desire for information, his fascination over the keyblades, and the one person that could bring him answers. Sora. This wasn't about Axel at all. Roxas had wanted to meet Sora and now the chance was gone. "Thanks Rox" Axel snapped and couldn't help the bite to his words. "Your concern is heart wrenching."

Roxas didn't reply. Instead, turning to Xemnas, placing his hands on the superior's desk, and knocking papers onto the floor, his fingernails scrapping into the wood. "I should have been the one chosen to go! Not Axel. I wanted to see Sora. I wanted to talk to him!"

Xemnas glanced up at Roxas, expression neutral but he didn't say anything.

Axel realized his friend was quickly and dangerously crossing the line. No one ever dared to speak to Xemnas this way and he felt an increasing sense of foreboding "Roxas…maybe you should-"

Axel soon found his effort meaningless when Roxas hastily cut him off. "Sora is the only I know of who can use the keyblade besides me. He's the keyblade's chosen one" Roxas looked over his shoulder and pointed menacingly towards the redhead. "Axel shouldn't be the one sitting there right now it should be me!"

"Roxas enough" Xemnas said dryly.

"You're hiding something. Tell me. Why don't you want me to see Sora!?"

"Roxas I said enough" Xemnas's tone was low and there was a warning to it.

Roxas hardly even acknowledge Xemnas as he continued in a sharp desperate voice. "You know why I can summon the keyblades! Don't you? Is it something to do with Sora? Is that why you don't want me to meet him? You knew I wanted to see him. You knew! It was my right and you sent Axel!"

"Number XIII do not make me repeat myself again" Xemnas did not raise his voice but it was cutting and piercing all the same. "Wait outside. I'll deal with you when I'm ready."

Roxas slid his hands off Xemnas's desk, breathing deeply as if he realized what he'd just done, anger fading from his face, replaced with anxiety. Roxas was still visibly tense and Axel knew his friend must be feeling a great deal of frustration, was almost sure that at that moment Roxas wanted more then anything to force the answers from Xemnas. Roxas was so close to them but he was also still so far away. Roxas nodded and headed to the door, closing it after him with a hard thud but at least it didn't slam.

Axel looked towards the door, longing to go after his friend and knowing he couldn't at the moment.

"I believe our key of destiny needs an attitude adjustment" Xemnas said in a low and off-handed voice.

Axel glanced back to the organization's white haired leader. "Or it could just be all those teenage hormones I keep hearing about."

Xemnas grunted, not lowering himself enough to give a reply. Then Axel hadn't expected one either. Xemnas reached down to pick up the fallen papers.

"He didn't know what he was doing" Axel persisted. "He got carried away."

"Roxas knew what he was doing." Xemnas replied. "But what he just did doesn't bother me. He's in the clear if you're that concerned about it."

"Good" Axel said and couldn't keep the relief out of his voice. "You know he's going to find out one way or another that Sora is his-"

"I'm well aware of that" Xemnas interjected. "I'll tell him when I deem it necessary"

"He's not going to stop asking questions" Axel slowly pressed. "It might be better if you told him now."

"Do not attempt to contradict me Number VIII" Xemnas said in a hard voice as he straightened the papers on his desk. "Honestly I sincerely doubt his ability to handle the truth, which…could turn out to be a good or a bad thing"

"What are you talking about?"

"Castle Oblivion failed and with it the attempt to get to Sora without Roxas. I will not reveal anymore."

Axel frowned and shook his head. "Listen, all I want to know is, if you are planning on telling him or not?"

For a second Axel was afraid he overstepped his bounds when Xemnas stared back at with heated eyes, but slowly the superior nodded. "Yes I am, Roxas is nothing but relentless. Shortly I will have no choice but to tell him whatever the consequences may lead to."

"Consequences?" Axel asked doubtfully. "What do you think he's going to do? Sora is out of the way and has been taken care of. It's not like Roxas can just get up, leave, and follow him."

Xemnas laced his hands together and rested his chin on his fingers, looking thoughtful. "Call it a premonition if you will. Hopefully for Roxas's sake, he will carry out his purpose and the ensuring aftermath will not be too severe."

"Right" Axel replied, quickly growing uncomfortable with this conversation. "I'm sorry to want to cut this short and everything but is there anything else you want me to go over?" Axel lifted an arm, picking at the torn and red crusted sleeve of his robe. "Because I would like to get cleaned up sometime this week."

Xemnas lowered his eyes back to his papers. "You're dismissed. Tell Roxas I'll be with him shortly."

Axel stood up from his chair, stretching his arms over his head until he could feel a satisfying pop at his back, walked over to the door, and twisted the handle. "Right. Thanks"

Xemnas glanced back up at Axel. "Number VIII"

Axel looked over his shoulder. "Yes?"

Xemnas was staring at him with heated and knowing eyes. "I do commend the loyalty you showed me in Castle Oblivion. Make sure it stays that way."

Axel felt a sudden chill in the air and for a split second, considered if maybe Xemnas knew everything that had taken place at Castle Oblivion. As soon as Axel thought of the concept, he dismissed it. There was no way Xemnas could possibly know. Axel's own loyalty was not something the redhead wanted to discuss, being blurred, wavering, and twisted. Axel looked out for himself and he wondered if Xemnas had guessed a certain aspect of that, nearly felt that with Xemnas's intent stare, the superior could look right through him. Axel nodded an affirmative, quickly leaving the room.

Axel found Roxas right outside Xemnas's office, leaning against a wall, looking down toward the ground, hands slightly curled, and shoulders slumped. If Axel didn't know Roxas better, he would almost say his friend was sulking. "Xemnas says he'll be right with you."

Roxas shrugged but otherwise remained unmoving.

Axel walked over to the blonde so he was standing right in front of him. "You know you really can't talk to the superior like that. You're so lucky he likes you, if that would have been anyone else they probably would've been struck dead."

Roxas jerked his head up. "I know you're right okay?" Roxas snapped. "It was stupid. I wasn't thinking."

Axel shook his head and waved a hand in front of him. "Hey hey hey…wait a minute. Say that again."

Roxas glared. "What?"

"C'mon just say it one more time."

"I wasn't thinking"

Axel broke into a wide grin. "No the first part about me being right. I want to savor the moment."

Roxas blinked and looked blank before he slowly lifted a hand to his mouth, surpassing a small laugh.

"There you go" Axel said, sounding proud of himself. "Exactly what I was looking for."

"Whatever."

Axel crossed his arms, smile fading, the emerald green of his eyes turning somber. "Seriously Rox, trust me you weren't missing anything at Castle Oblivion that place was…" Axel trailed off becoming lost in his own thoughts before he quickly finished. "Be grateful you weren't there."

"Sora was there"

Axel sighed, moving so he was standing beside Roxas. "Right…Sora was there," he repeated.

Roxas fisted his hands, voice coming out biting, almost frantic but confident. "It's not fair. I only wanted to see him, to talk with him. Everything…about me I could have learned so much. Now it's all over and I wasn't able to learn anything. Xemnas is hiding something about Sora. He has to be."

"Since when has Xemnas not been hiding something? " Axel returned dully, but then paused, choosing his next words carefully. "Besides he has his reasons"

"I don't care about that!" Roxas replied sharply. "I want to know the truth. He knows something and so do you and some of the others. I'm sick of it."

Axel turned his head to glance at his friend. The redhead had known about the connection between Roxas and Sora for some time and so did a few select others. Roxas was continually left out of the loop and Axel wasn't the least bit surprised the blonde had picked up on it. Axel did nothing to try and deny the fact. "I want to tell you Roxas"

"So tell me. What are you waiting for?"

Axel breathed in deeply. "I want to…" The redhead let his eyes flicker to the white ceiling, seeming at odds with himself before he glanced back at Roxas. "But I can't under orders and everything."

Roxas gave him a stony look. "I'm going to find out" The blonde's voice was hard and emotionless

Axel studied his friend, not doubting Roxas's words for a moment. Roxas seemed so distant, nearly lost, only having a half-truth to go on. Axel wanted to wrap an arm around Roxas's shoulders, put his mind at ease. After Castle Oblivion and being gone for so long, Axel wanted to assure himself that Roxas was real, alive, and breathing. The redhead knew he would do anything for the boy that was standing right beside him but he didn't act on the strange and sudden impulse, didn't even move, instead only giving a vague supportive smile. "I know, look Xemnas told me he was going to tell you. You just have to hang on until then."

Roxas glanced up at him and met his gaze, Axel didn't miss the hopeful look. "When?"

"Soon I promise"

Roxas was quiet for a minute and Axel could almost see him thinking it over. "Alright" Roxas said bitterly. "But you shouldn't promise things."

Axel shrugged. "Probably right."

Roxas didn't reply and off of his friend's silence, Axel lifted an arm and put his thumb and forefinger together. "So did you miss me even just a little?"

The hard look in Roxas's eyes faded somewhat, replaced by faint amassment, corners of his mouth rising into an almost smile. "Do you really want me to answer that?"

Axel didn't have time for a comeback before Xemnas's door opened and the head of the organization walked out into the hallway. Axel found himself pushed to the side as Roxas's attention became instantly and completely focused on Xemnas. The blonde raced over to him with out even a glace back, reaching him, and saying something that Axel couldn't hear.

Xemnas nodded and the two of them walked further away, talking in low and mumbled tones. It was easy to see, Xemnas favored the blonde. Ever since the organization's white haired leader had found Roxas in Twilight Town the two of them had formed a strange and almost secretive relationship. Axel wasn't sure what Xemnas wanted with the kid or if he was trying to manipulate him somehow.

Xemnas would stop at nothing to reach his goals and Roxas could prove to be an important part in them. With Xemnas there was always an alterative motive, the conversation they had a few minutes ago, making that painfully obvious. Axel wondered if Roxas sensed that. His friend was good at figuring things out for himself and seeing through deception. Axel knew all he could do was have trust in Roxas but the whole situation still irritated him to no end.

Axel watched them a minute, trying to make out some of the conversation but failing. He wanted to stay and talk to Roxas afterwards but dismissed the desire, turned his back and walked away, settling for going to get himself cleaned up.

Xemnas told Roxas about Sora two weeks later.

0o0o0o0

"You went after Number XIII then?" Xemnas asked as he finally looked up from his desk.

Startled, Axel jerked his head forward. "Huh?"

"Number XIII, you went after him but were unsuccessful in locating him," Xemnas said in a deep voice.

"Ahhh right" Axel replied absently. "I couldn't find him."

Xemnas folded his arms on top of his desk, staring fixedly at Axel. "This is a very delicate situation I've been put in."

"I know."

Xemnas arched an eyebrow. "Do you?"

"Yes" Axel answered in a monotone voice. "In order for us to complete Kingdom Hearts and reach our goals, more hearts must be released meaning more heartless have to be killed. Roxas could have helped with that but since he's gone, he obviously can't. Still that isn't the whole reason is it?" Axel paused and grinned daringly. "No, that's only what you want the rest of the organization to think, it goes much deeper and I believe I've figured out why."

"Do enlighten me then."

"It was the whole reason for Castle Oblivion, why you have always been so preoccupied with Roxas, why you told Roxas about Sora right after he was said to have disappeared. You wanted Roxas to seek out Sora because it's not Roxas you want. It's Sora."

Xemnas nodded, not seeming at all surprised. "Hmm…if I were to say one thing, you are perceptive."

"Sora could accomplished everything Roxas is capable of" Axel continued "Sora would keep fighting until the worlds are saved and the heartless are defeated, this would have sped up our goal but there's an advantage Sora has that Roxas doesn't"

"And that is?"

"Roxas is not the keyblade's chosen one and he never will be. He can only control it because he's what's left over from Sora. Sora has a heart to make him stronger, to get him through. Roxas doesn't. Roxas can't seal worlds and Roxas can't open Kingdom Hearts."

"You never cease to amaze me Axel." Xemnas said with a contemplative smile. "In regards to Sora, Roxas is nothing and after the failure of Castle Oblivion my original intention was for Roxas to find Sora for me, they have a connection and Roxas has the best chance of accomplishing it. However, there is more to it then that. If Sora was brought back into the picture or if Roxas is able to find him somehow or to join with him the results could be just as equally disastrous. I've been having growing doubts about all of this. The keyblade master has the ability to single handily take out all of us. He is the chosen one for a reason and I have come too far to underestimate what Sora may be capable of."

"So we need Sora to open Kingdom Hearts but Sora can also obliterate us in the process. Sounds like a lose lose situation to me."

"Not necessarily, Kingdom Hearts may take longer to reach without the keyblade master but it is still possible. I can be patient. I have waited this long and we are so close I can almost taste it. I will not risk having my plans spoiled by anyone."

"What are you intending then?" Axel asked, already knowing the answer but still dreading it.

"I have given that a great deal of thought," Xemnas answered easily. "I have decided there is too much riding on Number XIII. He has turned traitor but only for the sake of his own intentions, which are chaotic. Roxas has proven over and over again he is no more then an insolent child, unreliable, and untrustworthy. I can no longer take the chance of his finding Sora. The situation is beyond dangerous and the only way to resolve it is for Number XIII to be found and readily destroyed. In comparison with completing Kingdom Hearts that is our top priority."

"So the moment he stops being useful to you," Axel snapped "You decide to take him out of the picture?!"

"Precisely."

Axel gritted his teeth but thought back to what he and Roxas had gone through the pervious night. Everything Xemnas said had already happened. Roxas being out there alone would always be a threat in itself but after meeting Sora, Roxas wanted nothing more to do with his other. "You don't have to worry about Roxas finding Sora."

"Really now, why would you say that?" Xemnas asked with a skeptical tone to his voice. "Unless you know something I do not."

"I don't" Axel replied unwaveringly. "Call it intuition."

"No matter" Xemnas said airily. "My decision is final. Roxas will be destroyed especially since he has proven to be unstable."

"He's not unstable!" Axel said cuttingly before he could stop himself.

Xemnas sat back in his chair, not the least bit concerned with Axel's reaction. "That is not the issue at hand. What we need to do is focus on annihilating Roxas as quickly as possible."

Axel's expression turned grim. "I'm not helping with that."

"I don't expect you too" Xemnas replied straightforwardly. "It is not difficult to see you have become attached to Number XIII, something I may add that was never supposed to happen and because of this I honestly doubt your ability to carry out the mission. That is why I am appointing someone else and I will appoint others if need be."

Axel felt something knot in his stomach and a moment of all consuming panic, having a feeling he knew exactly who Xemnas was talking about. Axel opened his mouth to ask, only to find his throat dry. He quickly swallowed but did not have a chance to voice anything before a heavy knock at the door came.

"I believe that is him now," Xemnas said sounding satisfied. "This is exactly the time I told him to meet me up here, perfect timing as always."

"You set this up?'

Xemnas gave a strange knowing smile before he turned his head toward the door, raising his voice. "Yes, come in."

Axel watched the door swing open, all he could do was hope it wasn't who he thought it would be but knowing at the same time that it was. For a second Axel let himself, pretend this wasn't happening. He could almost envision Roxas walking into Xemnas's office, angry and demanding answers as usual. However, it wasn't his blonde friend that entered, it was a man with long sky blue hair with a jagged scar in the shape of an 'x' that was spread out across his face. Saïx.

Axel's breath hitched, his fear confirmed. Saïx was the one who was Xemnas's chosen second in command, always appearing emotionless and calm but inside was twisted, dangerous, and deadly. He was the man who could use the power of moonlight and would stop at nothing until Roxas was hunted down.

"Saïx" Xemnas said in greeting.

Saïx looked to the leader of the organization, completely disregarding Axel, lowering his eyes, and bowing his head slightly. "Superior" he returned.

"Are the preparations in order?" Xemnas asked.

Saïx raised his head and met Xemnas's gaze with an impassive expression. "Yes, I request permission to leave."

"Granted."

Saïx didn't reply but turned towards the door. When he reached it, he glanced back over his shoulder. "I will not let you down Superior. I will find our traitor and he will pay."

"Yes" Xemnas said. "But understand I cannot take any chances with this. I know you will do everything in your power. I have trust in your abilities so lets hope you shall succeed." Axel didn't miss the faint threatening tone at the end of Xemnas's words.

Saïx nodded and closed the door behind him. Just like that, the blue haired nobody was gone. Axel hastily stood up from his chair, intent on going after Saïx. Xemnas turned his head towards Axel and nodded his dismissal, just before the redhead fled the office, not that Axel would have waited for one anyway.

Axel instantly spotted Saïx, walking briskly down the hallway and raced to catch up with him, preparing himself for what he was about to do. Confronting Saïx was not the sanest thing in the world. Axel could more then enjoy the heat of battle but he also knew the importance of thinking things through. Although when it came to Roxas, Axel found he virtually always did act irrationally.

Axel reached Saïx in seconds, placing a hand on his shoulder, making the scared nobody come to a halt, fingernails digging into the heavy material of the other's robe. Axel leaned forward, his mouth right by Saïx's ear, speaking as low as possible. "If you so much as touch him, I'll take my chakrams and rip you apart limb from limb then as you lay bleeding to death in agony, I'll watch you fade away into nothing and with your last breath I'll light you on fire for kicks."

Saïx jerked his shoulder harshly out of Axel's grip, turning to face him, and not looking the least bit moved. Then slowly, Axel could see the corners of Saïx's eyes crease and a callous grin begin to form on his lips. When he spoke, his voice was cold and relaxed. "I always knew you were a traitor, ever since you were the only one to come out of Castle Oblivion alive. I don't know why the superior continues to trust you. If it were up to me you would have been put out of your misery long ago."

"This isn't about Castle Oblivion," Axel snapped.

"No it's not," Saïx agreed. "This is about Number XIII who you so conveniently followed last night and couldn't find."

"I already explained the story" Axel shot back defensively. "I did go after Roxas but there was no trace of him. He was nowhere."

"I highly doubt that. I think you know exactly where he is. It's too bad I don't have a way of proving it."

"You can't prove anything because I don't know" Axel returned simply. "And even if I did, I would make sure you never found him."

Saïx paused, looking thoughtful before his grin increased, eyes shining with cynicism "Alright, then say I believe you. If you couldn't find him, tell me this. What exactly went on last night?"

"I searched for him that was all," Axel replied grimly but quickly.

Saïx tilted his head, looking as if he was enjoying this. "Nothing more, are you sure about that? Anything unforeseen didn't happen? Nothing went wrong?"

Saïx was deranged but extremely insightful and the scared nobody was acting as if he was hiding all of Axel's dark secrets. The redhead didn't know if Saïx knew anything or if this was all speculation. Then Saïx could just be trying to bait Axel in to admitting what he already suspected. Axel didn't allow himself to be intimidated, narrowing his eyes. "If you're tying to get to a point make it already."

"You are lying." Saïx said lifelessly. "You know exactly where Number XIII is and it wouldn't surprise me if you know where that keyblade kid is too."

Axel met Saïx's gaze unfaltering but without replying. He had no need to explain anything further to the scared nobody and Saïx would only continue to manipulate and twist anything he said. All Axel could do was show Saïx he wasn't backing down.

Saïx seemed to get the hint and nodded. "Right well as I thought, anyway I'm through wasting words with you. I have much more pressing matters to attend to" Saïx turned away from Axel, proceeding to walk down the hallway.

"I won't allow you to hurt him Saïx." Axel stated before Saïx could get too far. "You won't even so much as set sight on him."

Saïx glanced back, with a self-assured expression, his voice coming out vaguely amused. "And you are going to make sure of that how?"

"I will track you down." Axel answered firmly. "Everywhere you go I will be behind you, every step of the way. You won't even be able to breathe without looking over your shoulder."

Saïx frowned. "You are quickly forgetting your place Number VIII and besides that point Xemnas told me you weren't even on the mission anymore."

Axel let his voice lower into a dangerous whisper. "Do you really think that's going to stop me?"

Saïx rose a had to his chin, looking contemplative but there was the beginning of a sneer on his face. "Hmm…I suppose not. Fine then, there is a whole universe Roxas could be hiding in. Locating him will take time but in the mean time hold true to your word. Trail me, trail the others, stop us from finding him. Then be exposed for what you truly are so that I may end your pathetic existence."

Axel didn't have a chance to respond before there was a shout from the hallway. "Axel! Hey Axel!"

Axel turned his head to see Demyx running toward him with his hand raised.

"As nice as our little chat was if you'll excuse me I must be going" Saïx said. Without another word, the blue haired nobody walked away, his steps echoing on the hard floor. Axel continued to watch him until he was out of sight, Demyx reaching him as soon as Saïx disappeared around a corner.

Demyx placed his hands on his knees, trying to catch his breath. "Hi Axel."

"What?" The redhead snapped.

Demyx didn't answer, instead lifting his head and staring at the spot Saïx had occupied only moments before. "Wow Saïx, that couldn't have been good."

Axel turned away, walking toward the direction of his room. "Thank you for the observation."

"Ahh… Right" Demyx replied as he followed Axel.

"Did you want something?"

Demyx smiled uncomfortably and ran a hand through his dark blonde hair. "I wanted to know what happened. Did you find Roxas? Is he okay?"

"I didn't find him."

"Oh really?" Demyx asked, sounding a bit surprised. "What do you think happened to him?"

Axel increased his pace and shrugged.

Demyx unconsciously took quicker strides to keep up with Axel. "I hope he's okay."

"Roxas can take care of himself."

"I know but why do you think he left us?"

"Because he was fed up with all of us," Axel replied harshly. "Especially those of us who didn't know when to stop asking questions."

Demyx didn't seem to get the point and continued to follow Axel, when he spoke there was a wistful note to his voice. "Hmm… Do you think he's coming back?"

"No, he's never coming back" Axel answered sharply

Demyx scrunched his face up, clearly displeased with the idea. "That's a depressing thought. I hope he does. I really liked Roxas and we were friends. Okay…so maybe we weren't actually friends but this one time I was playing my sitar and Roxas came by and told me how great he thought it was." Demyx paused, his voice rising in excitement. "Now that automatically makes him cool in my book!"

Axel shot Demyx a doubtful look.

Demyx laughed nervously. "Okay so maybe he didn't say that exactly. Mainly he just told me to stop playing because the noise was keeping him up. Although, I don't know how it would since my room is in a different hallway. I know with these walls the noise can carry but do you think it can carry that far?"

Axel at last reached his room and walked inside.

"Come to think of it that was the only time Roxas actually took the time out to speak to me. No…wait there was this one other time when-"

Axel promptly closed his door in Demyx's face, breathing in deeply and letting himself sag against it. Demyx's voice came out muffled from the other side. "Right well…umm…I guess I'll go then." Axel could picture Demyx scratching his head and then Axel head Demyx's footsteps as the water powerful nobody walked away.

Axel didn't move from his place by the door, letting his eyes glance around his room. It wasn't anything spectacular. The floor and walls were white like all the rest of the castle but at least it was large with a nice bed and contained all the necessities. Everything was now cast in shadow nearly to the point of being pitch black but Axel didn't feel a need to turn a light on. The redhead's eyes landed on his window. It was large, low to the ground, and overlooked a large part of the city. The edge was glowing faintly as it always did, just barely illuminated by the rose colored heart shaped moon. A memory came back to him.

0o0o0o0

Axel just came back from a mission that had taken the entire day. It was late or so the redhead assumed with this world. His muscles were aching and his body was weary, all Axel wanted was sleep. He'd give the report to Xemnas tomorrow. Axel walked into his room to see his window wide open and Roxas curled up on the windowsill, his back against the frame and hunched forward hugging his legs with his head resting on top of his knees, obviously sleeping. Roxas was cast in the dim moonlight while everything else was obscured in shadow.

Axel found himself momentarily stunned. Roxas had never sought him out before much less came into his room. The redhead knew something must be off, but didn't voice anything, closing his door behind him with a barely audible click. Usually it would have only taken that faint sound to wake Roxas up but the blonde didn't stir. Slightly concerned, Axel walked over to him and knelt by the window, placing a hand on the blonde's shoulder, shaking him awake. "Hey Roxas."

Waking Roxas wasn't the safest thing to do and Axel was prepared to block in case a keyblade came at his throat but Roxas just jerked his head up and blinked at him through unfocused eyes.

"You've got to stop falling asleep on places like windowsills," Axel said in a low quite voice but there was a slight trace of humor in it. "Sometime you're going to fall off."

Roxas seemed to come back to himself, eyes losing the glazed over look and his blank expression turned to one of recollection before he nodded tiredly and placed his head back on his knees.

The redhead stood up and walked over to his bed, sitting down heavily, taking off his boots. "Not that I'm complaining Rox but what are you doing in here anyway?"

Roxas mumbled something that Axel couldn't catch.

"What?"

The blonde picked his head up. "I said I tore up my room."

Axel kicked his boots away, laying back on his crimson red bedspread, not even bothering to take his cloak off, and placed his hands behind his head. "Okay and why exactly did you do that?"

Roxas uncurled from himself and stretched out on the windowsill, until his back was leaning fully against the frame and his feet were pressed up on the opposite side. Roxas turned his head, staring into the endless abyss of the black sky. There was such a long pause that Axel didn't think Roxas was going to answer the question then at last the blonde spoke. "Xemnas told me about Sora."

Axel let his eyes flicker to the ceiling, breathing in deeply. "So you know then?"

"That Sora is my other?" Roxas replied distantly. "Yeah."

Despite the situation, Axel couldn't help the small grin that tugged at the corner of his mouth. "And because of that you tore up your room?"

Roxas nodded but didn't look away from the sky. "I was upset."

"I guess that's one way of dealing with it." Axel said absently.

"Only I'm going to have to clean it all up later."

"It could have been worse" Axel fell silent for a moment as his mind jumped to a new thought. When he spoke, again there was a faint trace of apprehension to his voice. "Hey, you're not mad at me, are you? For not telling you."

Roxas turned his head to glance at Axel with a neutral expression. "No, why should I be? Under orders and everything right? That's not something I think I should care too much about."

Axel gave a partial relieved smile. "Nice of you to let me off the hook."

"It all makes sense now that I think about it," Roxas said with a strangely reflective tone. "Why I'm connected with the keyblades when I don't even have a heart, why Xemnas didn't want me to meet Sora, it's even in my name."

"Why you can't remember your past life," Axel added.

"Because there's nothing to remember," Roxas continued. "Sora never died and he's still out there out somewhere… all the signs were there. I should have realized it a lot sooner."

"Don't worry about it" Axel said dismissively "Besides Sora is gone for now anyway…. and there's nothing you can really do about it. You just have to move on."

Roxas shrugged. "I keep thinking if Xemnas knew that much about me and never said anything, then what else isn't he telling me?"

"It doesn't matter" Axel replied firmly. "Xemnas is just some whacked out nut job. We're not in the organization because of him. We're in it to get hearts, to become whole."

"Still there has to be more out there then just a non-existent world and Xemnas's undying love for Kingdome Hearts whether it leads us anywhere or not," Roxas said mockingly, letting his eyes glance around the room and gesturing to it with one arm. "There has to be more then just…this."

"I know and that's what we're aiming for."

"I think" The blonde said slowly. "I want to find out the truth for myself. I want to find Sora. There's so many things I what to know. What if Kingdom Hearts doesn't even work or Xemnas can't open it? Kingdom Hearts isn't something that can be easily pulled off. It's like some blurred dream and it's hard to believe in. You can't tell me you don't have second thoughts."

Axel knew everything Roxas said was true but the redhead didn't want to voice his beliefs about Kingdom Hearts and he didn't want Roxas to either. Axel could see Roxas's ice blue eyes shinning even through the darkness and Axel knew there was something more to his friend, a sense of living and reckless desire that ran behind the blue gaze, that none of the other nobodies possessed. It was something that drew Axel to Roxas but now the redhead found he was also beginning to hate it. The same desire was causing his friend to stray and Axel wanted to kill it before it could progress any further. "You're heading in the wrong direction Roxas. Don't dream it's dangerous."

There was a slight hurt look on Roxas's features but it was so fleeting Axel wondered if he imagined it. Roxas didn't say anything else, just turned his head away to look back out the window. The redhead felt slightly remorseful but he only hoped this conversation had ended and would be forgotten about.

It wasn't long afterwards until Axel felt the lure of sleep. With every passing second, his bed was starting to feel more and more comfortable against his worn out body. He let his eyes fall shut, quickly drifting off.

"I want a star," Roxas said abruptly.

Axel blinked his eyes opened, trying to clear his hazy mind and wake himself up. "You can't have a star Rox, they're too big."

"In the sky you moron."

"The sky?" Axel repeated sleepily

"It looks so empty," Roxas said with a longing tone to his voice. "Without any stars."

More awake now, Axel lifted a hand to his mouth and covered up a chuckle. "What do you expect? This is the world of nothing."

"I still want a star."

Axel turned in his bed and buried his nose into his pillow, dismissing the issue as one of those weird and random Roxas things. "Hmm good luck with that. I'm going back to sleep."

Axel secretly watched his friend for a few more minutes but Roxas remained silent, still gazing out the window with such intensity that Axel didn't even know was possible. For some reason Axel noticed then that there wasn't any breeze coming from the window. The air was always still and dead in this world except for the chilling and biting wind when it rained. Axel felt something like dread tear into his non-existent heart and the urge to shudder, suddenly reminded of the calm before the storm.

Axel didn't allow himself to think about it any longer and closed his eyes away from Roxas's faraway expression. Sleep claimed the redhead soon afterwards but before Axel was lost to the world, he heard a whisper as dead and motionless as the breeze but somehow still strong and brimming with emotion. 'I'm going to find out.'

That night had seemed to be a turning point for Roxas. The conversation about wanting to find the answers hadn't dropped like Axel had hoped. Instead the blonde's building interest in Sora and the keyblades escalated into a full out obsession that even made Xemnas leery. Roxas staying in Axel's room at all hours began to become commonplace. Roxas needed someone to voice things to or to just be there while he tried to make sense out of what he was seeking and his own frustration. Axel was sure he was the only one who listened.

0o0o0o0

The memory faded from Axel and the redhead looked toward his window almost expecting to see Roxas on his windowsill but there was only the faint glow of the moon and a vacant sky without stars.

Somewhere Axel knew Roxas was eventually going to go off on his own and turn against the organization. All the hints had been there but Axel didn't let himself acknowledge them. Then it suddenly struck Axel why even though he listened to Roxas he always tried to downplay what Roxas wanted and why he told his friend not to dream, knew why he chased after Roxas a night ago without any regard for his own life.

The reason was selfish, Roxas made him feel. It wasn't the blonde Axel cared about it was the feeling Roxas gave him but Roxas had left and he'd taken the feeling and everything else with him. Axel was only left with an empty room, shadows, and a half promise to keep the organization away from his friend for as long as possible. The redhead felt alone like he hadn't in over a year. He let his head fall backwards, against his door and shut his eyes. He could almost hear Roxas's voice, distant and yearning I want a star.

Axel kicked his wall.