"Emmett! I wanna turn! I wanna turn!" whined Alice.
"Okay okay pixie stick! We will go to Chick-Fil-A. Your turn!" said Emmett.
"YAY!" squealed Alice.
We pulled into Chick-Fil-A. Alice started to walk in the door.
"Umm… Alice? Where the hell did you get a cow suit?" I asked.
"It was in my pocket silly." Said Alice.
"Ok then." I replied.
Alice walked into the restaurant wearing her cow suit. She went up to the counter and said "HI!!! I need 24 double cheeseburgers. I'm a cannibal!"
"Umm… A. You are just a person in a cow suite. B. We don't sell hamburgers here." Said the person at the counter.
"Look,"
Alice squinted at the name tag. "Look, Rebecca, I AM A COW! A
LESBIAN COW! A MARRIED LESBIAN COW! I CHOPPED UP MY EX-WIFE AND SENT
HER TO YOUR MEAT PACKING PLANT! NOW I WANT MY CHEESBURGERS! BEFORE I
MURDERED HER I TOLD HER I WOULD EAT HER!"
"Look Cow-Wanna-Be,
WE DON'T SELL BEEF HERE! GET OUT OF MY RESTARANT!"
Emmett
walked in, wearing a mini-skirt and Rosalie's tank top.
"Sweetie?
Where are our burgers?" he/she asked.
Alice was no longer wearing her cow suit. She started to tear up.
"This mean lady won't give them to me. She called me a cow!" said Alice.
Emmett gasped. "HOW COULD YOU?"
"And a lesbian!" said Alice.
"Just because Allie is married to a girl doesn't mean she is lesbian! We are leaving this establishment. IN A HUFF!" said Emmett.
They walked out of the door into the Volvo. Once again, everybody started cracking up. "Now to bring some life into those McDonald's workers." Said Emmett deviously.