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Chap. 3

Jenny lost all sort of ability to speak. She looked at the sheet of paper the doctor handed her. She read the line over and over again. Pregnancy – POSITIVE.

"Ms. Shepard, I assume you weren't expecting this?"

Jen just shook her head, she never looked up from the paper. Her hands started shaking and she could feel the cold sweat run down her back. She desperately wanted to scream, laugh, cry, all of them at once. But she didn't know if it was because she was happy about the news or shocked, most probably the latter.

"Can I get you a glass of water Ms. Shepard?" the doctor looked at her worried.

Jenny's eyes shot open at the offer "Oh God, Jethro!" She said in a loud whisper more to herself than the doctor.

"This is just another wild guess, but Jethro, would he be the one to share this news with?" He looked at her intently and she just nodded at his guess. Until suddenly she rose to her feet.

"No no, oh God no. No doctor I can't do this. I can't tell him, he can't know about this doctor please."

"Oh I'm not telling anyone. But what do you say we do an ultrasound and figure out how far along you are?"

"Oh I know doctor, the night between December 22nd and 23rd!" she was still whispering.

"That makes you 17 weeks, but what do you say we do the ultrasound anyway, then not so much to clarify your baby's age but more to find out how it's doing. I don't know your normal size but I don't see much evidence that you are expecting a child." The doctor smiled at her

"God doctor could I have damaged the child in any way?" Jenny was suddenly nervous.

"Well you wrote in your papers that you drink bourbon, more coffee than what's healthy for any human being, sleep irregular hours, your diet is not exactly what I would call healthy or present at times and do you always wear those?" He said pointing at her shoes.

"So what you basically say is that yes I could already have damaged the child. And yes I always wear heels." She was shocked when she realized what the doctor had said.

"I'm not saying you've caused your child any damage, but I just want to make sure it's healthy and strong. So if you would lie down over there I will get the ultrasound." He got up and walked over and pulled a machine towards the examine table. And watched as Jenny slowly walked over to lie down.

"Now lets see here!" Dr. Dubris slowly moved the ultrasound over Jens lower abdomen. "There you are, beautiful baby you have here Ms. Shepard. Good size, a little small for a 17 week old fetus, but then again you are not showing the least as far as I can see. But everything looks great, you just need to get you life scheduled a little more. More sleep, more rest during the day, keep your stress level down to a minimum and eat at least three meals every day, and no more coffee and no more bourbon. I'll give you this vitamin supplement, and I would advise you to switch to at least lower heels just so you move the pressure from your lower back." He finished of with a smile and wiped of the gel, and Jen rose slowly still in a state of shock.

She walked out of the doctors office with a lot of different pamphlets and orders to take it easy and get her vitamins. She still felt like she was in a daze, when she walked out to her waiting car.

She had just seen her baby. It was real now. She was pregnant.

She didn't look up at Stanley as she entered the car, she held the ultrasound picture close to her chest as she felt the car speed of towards headquarters. She couldn't hold the tears back any longer.

One night of bliss and good old times was enough to bring back trouble. And once again Jethro was part of the trouble. She was pregnant. Pregnant with their child. How would she ever be able to tell him? Just after new years they'd had a huge fight, which resulted in no communication other than what was necessary, for weeks. And then this girlfriend thing of his, had come into the picture, she still hadn't meet her, but he was leaving at decent hours and got a smile on his face every time one special person called and he never brought dinner around her office anymore. Sure he still cared for Jen, she knew that or else he wouldn't yell at her, irritate her and all the other things. Even worry when he heard about a doctor's appointment. He seems happy the way things are now. She couldn't just ruin that.

Tears kept flowing, she looked out the window and knew instantly that she would have to pull herself together within the next five minutes, or it would be noticeable when she entered the bullpen.

Once in the parking lot, she quickly applied the last touch to her makeup before exiting the town car. She looked at Stanley and informed him to pick her up again at 7 pm that evening. She then walked to elevator and pressed for the bullpen. The way up was not a problem but the second the doors opened she froze. Suddenly worried that it would be noticeable that she was now aware of the fact she was with child. Most important would he notice?

She decided to just slip on the Director mask, she hadn't told the Director that she was pregnant yet. Yes she felt as two different people at the moment, but that made it easier to just kind of forgetting the whole situation.

She took a deep breath and walked straight to Gibbs's desk. He didn't even look up from the report he was writing on.

"What did the doctor say Jen?"

There it was, she was Jen, not the director. And here he was telling her who she was just a few seconds after she had decided that she was the director so she wouldn't have to deal with the whole situation of being pregnant with Jethro's child while talking to him. She swallowed hard.

"None of your business Jethro, now those reports, are you done with them?"

He closed the top file and handed her back the stack. And got up to help her up the stairs, as he came around his desk, he leaned in a whispered in her ear.

"I will find out sooner or later and you know it!" the goose bumps ran down her back at his breath against her ear. And she knew that this time he for sure would know. And her thought went to the folder she held in her briefcase, abortion after the 12th week. And the second that thought had passed through her brain she felt the tears starting to build up again. She would never be able to do that, she had seen the child on the ultrasound, the small arms and legs. And more importantly to her, she had seen the small eyes.

Jethro could feel his gut go off, something wasn't right or something was at least different, it didn't feel like a wrong feeling that went off, it felt strangely good. He could feel her trying to get her arm out of his grasp, once they reached the landing.

"Thank you Jethro, now let go of my arm!" She said coldly, but didn't dare to look into his eyes.

"Fine! I will be back in a little while and you will tell me what is wrong, what the doctor said." And with that he left her to go to her office.

She slammed her door shut behind her, and threw everything down on top of her desk and a small shaking hand landed on her abdomen.

"How am I going to do this!"