Disclaimer: Please don't sue. I don't own POTO... All I own is an overactive imagination.
Summary: ErikRaoul slash. Raoul and Erik meet before the whole fiasco. This is what happens.
Warning(s): homosexuality (that's what slash is people)
Pairing(s): ErikRaoul
Author Note: Fun fact – I was going to title this story 'kidnapped', do you know why now?
Story Note: Hope you enjoy this chapter. It's a little short because I'm bad and started late on writing this chapter (at least I didn't lie). It's Raoul-centric (but when isn't it Raoul-centric).
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Imaginary Friends
Chapter 28 – Remember
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By: Lucifer Rosemaunt
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Last time: Who cares about everything else… Raoul got kidnapped again!
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"Brat."
Raoul looked up immediately at the familiar voice. It was like waking up from a long sleep, except he knew he hadn't been asleep. The errant thought that he hadn't heard the door open crossed his mind. He was sitting in a corner, a blanket draped over his shoulders. It was sometime in the afternoon but he couldn't be too sure since there was only one source of light. Unfurling his legs, he tried to stand but stumbled, his legs feelings incredibly unstable.
Almost falling backwards, a bony but strong arm caught him and lifted him up easily. Raoul's arms immediately went around his saviour's neck and his legs wrapped around his waist. The action felt familiar. It wasn't a surprise to find himself in this scrawny boy's arms.
"Erik." His voice sounded quite high pitched.
Erik held him closer – so close that Raoul had no choice but to hug him, the brown sack rubbing against his cheek.
"Did you fall asleep?" Erik asked.
Raoul clung tightly to him. No he hadn't, at least he didn't think he had. It just felt like he hadn't seen Erik in years. In his mind, he knew that Erik hadn't been gone for very long. He always came back to their carriage and he left only because he had to, to find his family. Raoul knew it, but why did this hug feel so much better than the previous ones? Why, though familiar, did it feel like he hadn't been able to hold onto Erik in a while?
He knew this feeling. He felt it whenever his father left on business trips, but those trips usually lasted months. He couldn't understand why he felt so lost right now.
"Hey," Erik tried to pull him away, but Raoul only held on tighter. "Brat?" When that only prompted Raoul to grip him so tightly he could barely breathe, Erik amended, "Raoul."
Hearing his name, Raoul loosened his grip. Erik moved them on the floor so that Raoul could sit on his lap, as he had gotten used to doing in their time together. He managed to extract Raoul's arms from around his neck. When Raoul's face finally came into view, Erik hesitantly reached up to wipe the tears away. Raoul wouldn't look at him though, wouldn't look at the burlap sack.
"What happened this time?" Erik asked.
Raoul pouted and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand and sniffled loudly.
"Did you try yelling again? I told you not to." Erik reasserted. He couldn't let his master find out if Raoul had been trying to get people's attention. It would ruin everything. Erik would certainly be punished, but for some reason he found that was the least of his worries. He didn't care what happened to him. All that seemed to matter was this little boy. He didn't know what his master would do to Raoul as punishment but swore to himself that he would never let that man lay a hand on him. After ruffling his hair affectionately, Erik wiped Raoul's cheeks, drying the remaining tear streaks. The little boy finally looked up at him then, his large blue eyes wide and tear-rimmed.
"No more tears, brat, and tell me what happened."
"I'm not a brat," Raoul pouted, crossing his arms.
Erik smirked beneath the sack, "Only brats cry for no reason."
"I have a reason," Raoul argued.
"And?"
"I thought," Raoul's brows furrowed and he momentarily looked down, lost in thought. He looked back up, a frown marring his young face and an expression Erik couldn't name, "I thought you left me."
There was something in Raoul's eyes that actually made Erik falter. He tried to cover up his reaction by saying, "You know I only go outside for you, but I do come back. Just like the last few times."
But Raoul wouldn't accept his reply. "No. Not like that."
Erik closed his eyes. He knew what that expression had been on Raoul's face. Betrayal. He shook his head. That pinky swear earlier had been a promise. He'd meant it as much as Raoul had, and he swore to himself that he wouldn't betray this boy. Knowing that look had been caused by him made his chest hurt.
"I would never leave you," Erik declared and found he meant every word, though his mind appended the word 'willingly' at the end of the sentence. It wasn't just because he didn't want to see Raoul worried or cry or have that look of betrayal; he'd only known Raoul a day and he didn't want to have to go another without having the boy with him. "In some form or another, I'll always be with you." Erik figured he wasn't lying. Even if Raoul was going to leave him eventually, he would always have his memories.
Raoul grabbed Erik's hands and holding them tightly, tried to stare through the sack that covered his face. He nodded. After a moment, he asked, "Can I see your face?"
Erik immediately shook his head.
Raoul pouted but accepted the answer. Erik almost sighed. The haunted expression on Raoul's face disappeared and everything was back to normal again. He let the brat perform his usual check on his arms and chest for new bruises, his small hands and honest concern easing the pain away. There was a particularly bad bruise on his left shoulder that Raoul saw fit to lean forward and kiss. Erik tried not to smile at the action.
Settling back onto his lap when his inspection was complete, Raoul held his chin in his hand as he thought. "What were we talking about earlier?"
"You were talking about your brother," Erik reluctantly reminded him. They'd already gone through Raoul's parents already. His brother, Philippe, apparently took more than a single conversation though. Erik was almost jealous how much Raoul looked up to him.
Raoul smiled brightly and he felt that jealousy more distinctly.
"Father's quite proud of him," Raoul nodded, proud of his brother as well, "He can ride a horse all by himself."
Erik was sure he could ride a horse too, given the opportunity.
"And he's already very good with a saber and epee. He beat father once already."
Erik made a mental note to be able sword fight when he was older.
"Mother says he has great penmanship, unlike Father," Raoul giggled.
Erik frowned. He could learn how to write well.
"He even tells the greatest stories, using different voices."
Erik could tell stories. He could do different voices.
"And he knows this trick," Raoul snapped his fingers, but nothing appeared, "He won't tell me how he does it. He says it's magic," he shrugged.
Nodding, Erik reviewed all the tricks he'd learned from the gypsies. Nothing could be construed as magic.
"Ooh," Raoul's eyes widened, "And he's the best because," his voice softened, "Father wants me to be able to read and write already, and Philippe's been tutoring me." He smiled softly, "He's a great tutor."
Erik didn't catch himself quickly enough before the sullen words slipped out, "Can he sing?"
Raoul paused. His head tilted to one side in thought. Raoul laughed and shook his head, "No," he shrugged and stated as fact, "Mother sings to me and Philippe's tried, but no one sings as well as you do."
Grinning widely, Erik was glad that Raoul wouldn't be able to see his expression. He was certain he looked too pleased with himself.
Sighing, Raoul turned sideways and pulled Erik's arm around him. "You'll sing for me, won't you?"
Nodding, the words came to Erik easily. The melody was right there in his head. Even though he'd never tried to create songs before, even though he'd never heard the music in his head before Raoul's presence, it was simply there now. The same way that it felt like he'd spent years with Raoul, speaking with him, listening to his stories with him in his lap, and making up songs for him.
Raoul let the music take him away from the carriage, thinking of his family and what he and Erik would do when they escaped from this place.
o.o.o
Raoul woke up slowly. His body ached and his head felt heavy. He could still hear the song he'd heard in his dream, but something was wrong. The carriage he was in was moving, rather quickly too. Going over a bump, he knocked his head against the side of the carriage. He rubbed it gingerly and it felt like he was burning up; he could even feel the heat coming from his eyes. He shivered. Forcing himself to sit up, he realized his neck was a bit stiff as well. He turned towards the person singing.
Christine. She was humming softly to herself, interspersing words at random, as she looked out the window. Across from them their knees nearly brushing at such close quarters, Madame Giry and Meg sat. Madame Giry's eyes were closed and Meg was leaning heavily on her asleep.
Turning his attention away from them, he wondered, what had that been? He didn't know where they were heading or how long he'd been asleep, but the most pressing issue he wanted to acknowledge first was that dream. Not having much energy left, he leaned heavily against the carriage again. He couldn't seem to focus; there were so many thoughts suddenly loose in his mind.
It wasn't a dream. Was it? Erik?
No response.
Raoul's eyes widened. God, the ghost and the voice in his head were the same. Sure, he'd known that before. He just hadn't known it, understood exactly what it meant. But they were.
That dream had been so different from the other dreams. He was certain it hadn't been a dream. No, it wasn't like any dream he'd ever experience before in his life. He'd just been a spectator, watching, and now, now it was as though the memories had always been there to start with. He didn't even know how he could have forgotten them. Yet, they were coming at him so quickly that it was almost overwhelming.
Erik was… Erik, the boy with the sack covering his face. The ghost, Erik, was the one who held him, who comforted him, who saved him. Raoul had even felt his face in the mausoleum, but now he knew what it looked like. He could see it in his mind's eye.
A stabbing pain shot through his head and he squeezed his eyes shut so as to not make a noise. All these thoughts were making his head spin. It was too much to think about right now. All he wanted to do was get into bed and sleep.
Wait. Shouldn't he be home by now?
The carriage was still moving, and glancing out of the window, Raoul could only see countryside; they were certainly not in Paris any longer. The sun had yet to rise, but the darkness of night was already lifting – that meant they had to have been traveling for a while. Where were they going?
Erik? Raoul wondered where he was. Just because he remembered didn't mean he didn't want Erik around still.
My guess is that we've been kidnapped again. Erik finally answered.
Raoul scowled, Why didn't you respond sooner?
Sorry. He did sound apologetic. I was trying to decide.
Decide what?
Like I decided all those years ago when I first left you alone, Erik explained. He seemed reluctant to be talking. It isn't healthy for me to be here.
Raoul paused, considering his words. He understood it would probably be considered unnatural to have another person's voice in his head, but to him, it felt natural. I need you, he stated simply.
Erik didn't respond immediately. You have me. I'm here now.
As the ghost or you? Raoul asked.
Don't call me that. Erik replied. You know who I am now. Don't make that distinction.
You aren't the same though. You know that. Raoul argued. Either way, I couldn't very well say 'you or you.'
We're more similar than you'd imagine.
Let's argue about this later. Raoul said, too tired to continue arguing.
Erik agreed. Are you feeling well?
You know very well how I feel. I can't let some illness stop me from getting back home though. Raoul replied. What do we do now though?
Not panicking and talking to them would be a good start. Erik added with a smirk, After all, being kidnapped by three women can't be all that bad.
Raoul almost snorted. One of them is Madame Giry. And why didn't you warn me earlier?
Warn you?
You usually have better instincts than I have in these matters.
Erik agreed. Better instincts. I can't tell the future though. One of them is Madame Giry. I did not see this coming.
Raoul glanced at the three women. It felt like it was taking so much energy just to do so though. He took a deep breath and tried to summon up all his energy. Erik was right, this couldn't be too bad. Maybe they were just confused, but it was almost morning and he was certain Philippe and the ghost would be worried. He cleared his throat. Christine immediately stopped humming and looked at him. Madame Giry woke as well. Meg only shifted before going back to sleep.
"Raoul." Christine reached out to him, but Raoul shook his head.
"Where are we?" He kept his attention on Madame Giry. He knew that Meg and Christine would've brought him home. If anyone were to blame for this, it would have to be the elder Giry. She didn't look apologetic. So, that ruled out accidental or having been forced to take him.
"It's necessary that we leave Paris," she said.
"Why?" Raoul could tell she meant it. She really thought that they needed to leave.
Madame Giry only answered, "It's for your own good."
Christine chimed in, "The opera ghost is trying to kidnap you."
Raoul faltered. "Uh, what?"
How much do they know? Raoul asked Erik. Do you think Christine knows?
Christine? Erik replied, I doubt she knows.
Madame Giry?
More likely. She seems to know a lot about the ghost. Didn't you notice that? Erik asked.
Raoul hadn't noticed that at all.
"You may not understand it," Madame Giry continued, using a calming voice even though he hadn't reacted poorly at all. "The phantom believes you to be someone in his past, and I do believe he intends to kidnap you."
To hide his reaction to her words, Raoul pretended to massage his temple with his hand. It wasn't difficult to pretend. A headache was forming right behind his eyes. He almost wished she would just cave in already. However, he forced himself to focus. He'd promised both Erik and Philippe to return home.
She knows about our past? He couldn't believe it.
Erik replied. I don't think so. She said that I 'believe' you to be.
Then, she thinks I'm not the same person and you're trying to kidnap me. Raoul concluded. It was almost too much for him to think about right now. He could barely get it straight in his head.
Sounds like it.
"You don't understand," Raoul tried to say reasonably.
"This is for your own good," Madame Giry said firmly.
Raoul rolled his eyes, frustrated. "I do not need to be protected. Why does everyone think that?"
Because you do? Erik replied.
Ignoring him, Raoul added, "I just want to go home."
"I won't allow that."
Taken aback, he responded, "I didn't realize you had that sort of authority to keep me against my will."
She looked unfazed, "I've had enough of that ghost's madness. He's gone too far this time and he will try to kidnap you."
Raoul stifled a groan. If anything, she was exacerbating his headache. He could almost swear he could feel himself getting more feverish. "That's what I'm trying to tell you," he glanced at Christine and remembered to hold his tongue. He knew that she didn't know. Or did she? The ghost, Erik – and this time it wasn't so weird to think his name – wasn't just some man hiding in an opera house. He had been tutoring Christine for years, had said so himself. Raoul didn't know why he hadn't realized it sooner. Erik had created another life for himself.
A wave of nausea suddenly hit him. He swayed a bit but managed to stay upright.
Where were you? Raoul couldn't quite hide the pain that laced the thought.
Confused at the sudden turn of his thoughts, Erik worriedly replied. What are you talking about, Raoul? Are you alright?
Why didn't you come back? Why…? Raoul remembered it all, the jumble of memories finally settling. If only he hadn't called out to Philippe. If only he'd been able to reach out faster and pull away from them. His throat tightened. He'd waited every day, expecting Erik to come. He'd hoped for him, hoped they hadn't killed him or that he wasn't stuck in prison with the monsters.
He'd asked Philippe what happened to criminals and though his brother had told him that Erik would be fine, he'd heard stories from the servants. They said that Erik would probably be thrown in a cell and beaten. They said he'd probably be killed. Raoul had heard all the stories, and hoped, prayed that they weren't true.
He hadn't much time to worry though, hadn't much time to think about what else could have happened to Erik such that he wouldn't find his way to Raoul's side. His parents had died and he'd just forgotten it all.
Raoul, are you alright? Erik barely got all those thoughts. They were jumbled together, but he did feel the crushing guilt.
It's all my fault. Raoul stated, realizing it for the first time.
It wasn't your fault. Erik sounded almost panicked. I can tell you this a million times over, and it will be true every time. None of what happened was your fault. I need you to calm down.
I am calm. Raoul's thoughts did suddenly just stop.
It made Erik worry; Raoul's temperature was rising steadily.
Raoul just looked at his lap, unseeing, just feeling the heat behind his eyes. It was my fault. It is. And now what am I doing? I burned down the opera house.
The Comte did that. Erik almost yelled. Raoul. Tell them you're ill. We need a doctor.
And I was the reason the Comte was called anyway. Raoul reasoned. I was the reason the police were called. The reason why you were taken. It's all been my fault.
Growing frustrated, Erik finally did yell. Loud enough to make Raoul wince. Raoul. Stop it. I mean it. Just stop. We need some help. Now.
God. What am I thinking? Raoul squeezed his eyes shut. He swayed again. I have to make Madame Giry take Christine back. I've ruined her future. Erik, you were building a future with her. She meant so much. Even I know that.
What are you talking about? Erik asked. Raoul, you're babbling.
Raoul pulled the front of his shirt away from his throat. He heard it tear. I can't breathe. I can't breathe.
Calm down.
Christine was immediately plastered against his side. "Raoul, are you alright?" She felt his forehead and gasped.
He shook his head. "I can't breathe."
She looked up at Madame Giry desperately. "He's burning up."
"Stop the carriage," Raoul said, curling up on himself. He couldn't stand the moving. His body suddenly felt heavy. The carriage was too stifling. He had to get out.
Madame Giry nodded and pounded at the top of the carriage. "Stop the carriage! Stop!"
Meg woke up startled. She immediately saw Raoul bent over. His shallow breathing almost sounded like sobs. "What happened?"
Christine looked up at her. "I don't know. What do we do?"
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End Chapter 28
Word count: 3,303
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A/N: Don't forget to R/R (Read and Review)!
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Chapter review: Fluff had been revived only to be overwhelmingly crushed by Raoul's angst. It's a good thing he forgot or else he'd be completely screwed up with that sort of guilt (not like having a voice in your head when you're older isn't kind of screwed up, but at least it's cute and amusing). But fifteen years of guilt all in one go is pretty overwhelming though.
That's sort of an evil cliffhanger. I'm sorry. It also sounds familiar… did I do this sort of plot line already? If I did, I could always rewrite this chapter. Hm?
You know what… no need to vote anymore. I know who the winner's going to be. Imaginary Friends continuation will definitely be following when this finally ends. You'd think I don't want them together with the rate this is going.