Disclaimer: Please don't sue. I don't own POTO... All I own is an overactive imagination.
Summary: ErikRaoul slash. Raoul and Erik meet before the whole fiasco. This is what happens.
Warning(s): homosexuality (that's what slash is people)
Pairing(s): ErikRaoul
Author Note: Sorry it's late. As said on my blog, I was flooded with work yesterday. T-T Tis a truly sad day when there's no time for fanfiction.
Story Note: Erik answers the big question. Not really though.
o.o.o.o
Imaginary Friends
Chapter 30 – Convergence
o.o.o.o
By: Lucifer Rosemaunt
o.o.o.o
Last time: Erik returns to the Chagny estate only to find that Philippe hasn't found Raoul either. After Philippe tells his side of the story, they realize that the only likely candidate to have taken Raoul is Madame Giry. So they make chase and in the lag time of travel, Philippe confronts Erik about his intentions towards Raoul. (*smirk.) Raoul, on the other hand, jumps out of the carriage and has the bright idea to just walk all the way back to Paris in the snow before falling to the floor.
o.o.o
Raoul woke up with a groan. He opened his eyes quickly, remembering having fallen to the ground outside the carriage.
Yes, you did collapse in the snow. Erik said angrily. I told you to get back into that carriage. Why don't you listen to me?
Rolling over onto his back, Raoul pulled the blanket higher to keep himself warm. He was quick to scan his surroundings though. He felt a little groggy, but at least it wasn't that suffocating heat.
He was in a sparse room. There was a chair in the corner as well as a small table and one single window to his left that he couldn't see through. A single candle on the bedside stand lit the room. He was alone in an unknown bed.
Where are we?
I don't know, Erik said irritably, we both fainted. I can't very well just control your body.
Look, Raoul stopped him before he could continue. He knew Erik had a reason to be angry with him. He hadn't been thinking straight and even though the guilt was still present, it wasn't as overwhelming as it once had been. His mind was a little clearer but he knew he still had a fever. It was too hot for him not to have a fever. I'm sorry.
You should be sorry. Erik's voice wasn't so much reprimanding any more as trying to plead with him to understand. You could have killed yourself. You need to stop feeling guilty.
At his last sentence, Raoul stopped being apologetic. I just can't stop. It's not that easy.
Erik was silent as Raoul continued.
I don't want to feel guilty. I don't even fully understand why I feel so badly, but it's there. Raoul sighed and pushed himself to a sitting position. I just want to go home, Erik. It feels as if I go home, everything will work itself out.
Erik's voice was calmer when he replied. Let's go home then.
What? Raoul was caught off guard.
I know what you're feeling. I don't think it will help any to just go home, but if it'll help ease your mind even just a little, I say we go. Erik added quickly. But you need to rest and get better.
Raoul's reply was immediate. Of course.
Before they could continue with their conversation, a tentative knock sounded. Raoul stared at the door and waited. It slowly opened and Christine peeked into the room. She smiled just as hesitantly as she entered the room fully, closing the door behind her.
Joy. Erik said over-exaggeratedly.
Raoul smirked and hid it behind a cough. He felt the exact same way. He didn't think he could stand to be around Christine right now.
She rushed to sit on the edge of his bed, near the middle, so that she was close but at least not invading his personal space.
"You gave us quite a scare. We had to stop at the next city and you've slept the whole day away." Placing her hand on his leg, she asked, "Are you alright?"
Raoul stared at her hand, remembering why he couldn't bear to look at her. She was supposed to be a dear friend and he had ruined her future. Their future together. He could swear that he could feel the heat of her hand through the blanket. It was much too warm.
Tell her to leave then. Erik suggested.
"I apologize for having frightened you. I think I'm feeling better now," Raoul replied, ignoring his suggestion. Christine wasn't at fault. She was just a victim in all this.
And you aren't? Erik asked. You aren't to blame.
"That's good. The doctor said that your fever is going down." Christine shifted, looking around the room. She pulled her hand away from his leg suddenly uncomfortable.
Probably because she technically kidnapped you. Erik explained.
Raoul wasn't going to be the one to start a conversation though. He sort of wanted Christine to leave so that he could speak with Erik a little longer about their plan to return home. His own bed sounded good right about now, good and uncomplicated.
They sat like that until he couldn't stand it any longer. He asked, "Why? Why did you take me?"
Christine glanced at him with hurt eyes. Raoul was forced to look away, unable to ignore the pang of guilt at such a look. He still wanted to know the reason why though.
"It was Madame Giry."
"I know," Raoul cut her off. He remembered that part in the carriage. "I want to know why you went along with it."
Christine shrugged. "I trust Madame Giry. She usually knows what's right."
"She knows…!" Raoul yelled before stopping himself. It gave him a headache to yell. She just said, she knows what's right. Raoul commented to Erik. They think keeping me from my home is what is best for me. What exactly are they planning? They can't keep me here forever.
Hm, Erik considered. He grinned as he commented, It isn't a well thought out plan, but then again, we can't judge on that aspect, can we?
Whose side are you on? Raoul pouted, crossing his arms in front of his chest.
Always yours. Erik's voice lost its teasing quality, becoming almost too serious.
Raoul found he couldn't even pretend to be mad at him any more.
Suddenly getting an idea, Erik suggested, Why don't you ask Christine about her tutor?
What? Why?
Erik had a feeling that things had changed but not in the way that Raoul thought.
Raoul hesitated. He didn't really want to know about their relationship. It would only make him feel worse about what he'd done.
You didn't do anything, and just ask. Erik insisted.
Clearing his throat, Raoul tried to sound nonchalant at the change of topic. "So, has your angel… Um, did you hear from him again?"
Nodding, Christine grinned. "Yes. He's well-pleased." She couldn't keep the pride or excitement from her voice, "He left me a rose and a letter. I know now that wherever I am, he's watching me proudly."
That sentence actually physically hurt Raoul to hear. He leaned forward to alleviate some of the pain in his chest.
Christine continued, not noticing his reaction, "It was a shame that the opera ghost had to ruin everything because tonight, tonight was going to special."
Raoul couldn't bear to hear of it any longer. He coughed loudly to drown out her words.
She stopped speaking and reached out to him.
Raising his hand to ward her off, he shook his head. "I'm fine. I just. I'm happy for you, Christine," he tried to mean it. He did mean it. She deserved all the best in life. Hers had been a difficult one after all. "I suddenly don't feel very well right now. Is it alright if I sleep for a bit and then you can tell me all about it later?"
Christine nodded. "Of course, Raoul. You need to get better and then I'm sure things'll look differently." She smiled sweetly at him before leaving the room.
Why did you make me ask her? Raoul asked once she was gone.
Erik sighed. I think you're taking what she said the wrong way.
What other way is there to understand what she'd said? Raoul retorted. Maybe… remember when Christine said something about no longer needing an angel but something more? What if that's what they were going to do last night?
What? No! Erik shouted, aghast. Never.
Don't become so defensive, Raoul retorted.
That's not what was going to happen. Erik said evenly. I can promise you that.
You aren't really the ghost. You can't say what his intentions really are. Raoul replied. He'd been trying to sort it out in his head. The Erik in his head was the young boy from the carnival all those years ago, the one who wore a burlap sack and protected him from monsters. He'd taken that personality and morphed it to support him all these years. The Erik that was the Opera Ghost didn't have to be anything like the one in his head. He was the man in the porcelain mask who terrorized the opera house and tutored Christine. He'd had a life without Raoul. He'd been trying to live a life completely separate from Raoul's own and would have continued to do so had Raoul not become the patron.
That may be true, Erik sifted through Raoul's thoughts. But, I do not think I could have changed that much.
Fifteen years is a lot of time. Raoul pointed out. He had different experiences than we did.
I can tell you one thing for certain. His feelings for you will never change.
Really? Raoul scoffed. That's the one thing that definitely should have changed. He didn't come back for me. You did.
Erik didn't have anything to say to that.
Raoul shrugged away the melancholy he felt as he took the blanket and pulled it around his shoulders. Moving his legs over the side of the bed, he shivered from the cold.
What are you doing?
Not answering, Raoul walked towards the frosted window he had seen in his first perusal of the room. He struggled to open it, the ice making it difficult. When he did, he was forced to pull the blankets around him tighter. A huge gust of wind blew in snow. Ignoring the cold for now, he stuck his head out the window. He almost couldn't see through the flurries of snow and darkness. They were on the first floor.
What are you planning? Erik pressed.
Raoul walked through the room and found his shoes. I'm going home. You said so yourself.
I said you need to get better first.
No, Raoul argued. You said I need to get better in general. I'll recuperate when I'm at home.
Erik sighed. This is a very bad plan, he pointed out.
I'm not going to walk. Raoul answered, We'll find a carriage, and I won't even be in the cold for very long.
Erik was still not convinced.
We made a promise, Erik. After everything… well, I can't break another one.
Erik sighed loudly to show his disapproval before answering against his better judgment, Fine. Let's hurry before they find us missing.
o.o.o
Erik's eyes widened at his question. The carriage suddenly felt too small. Avoiding Philippe's gaze, he asked, "What do you mean?"
Philippe smirked but answered seriously. "You came to the estate," he stated. He knew what he saw in Erik's eyes; he could see the devotion that the supposed terror of the opera house had for his brother. That was obvious, but he'd never seen that kind of depth from someone who wasn't family or a lover.
He wasn't blind. More than just devotion, he'd seen the way that Erik's eyes would linger just a little too long or not on Raoul's face. He wished he didn't have to think about this, but it was something he would eventually have to face if he was indeed serious about letting Erik stay in their home.
"I went to retrieve my mask," Erik replied evenly. His mind was racing though. Did Philippe know exactly how much he wanted Raoul?
"So I heard," Philippe nodded, "And the fact that they tackled you in the process of trying to grab my brother was what exactly?"
Glaring, Erik quickly thought of a reason, "I didn't think it prudent for him to go into that carriage."
Philippe hm'd in interest before asking, "Did you know why the carriage had been sent in the first place?'
Erik thought of the implications of his answer. If he'd known, then he shouldn't have been surprised about receiving the note later, and apparently, the staff told Philippe everything that had occurred. He didn't want to be caught in such an obvious lie. Moreover, if he'd known, he should have stopped it before Raoul even considered meeting the Comte.
"No, I didn't know why the carriage had been sent."
"Oh," Philippe commented. He was just biding his time until Erik really answered his question. At least speaking with him was better than worrying about Raoul. "So again, I have to ask. What you were planning to do with my brother had you successfully prevented him from going into that carriage?"
Erik scowled and looked away from Philippe. He had the sudden urge to Punjab him. No one dared question him like this. It was reminiscent of when the servants had questioned him; he felt just as trapped and just as helpless even though he could very well attack the other man. Physically, Erik could lash out, but he knew that he wouldn't. For Raoul, he couldn't. He could just imagine the disgust in Raoul's face if he learned that he had tried to kill his brother. It wasn't worth the risk, and he didn't want to admit that a part of him didn't want to. Maybe it was because Philippe reminded him of Raoul or the fact that he had offered his home without asking for anything in return, Erik didn't know. He just knew it would be a shame to kill the Comte.
It wasn't as though Philippe's question wasn't valid. What did he want from Raoul? He hadn't really thought about it. Well, admittedly, he'd had stray thoughts as to what he'd do with him, but that's not the kind of answer he could give Raoul's brother nor was it really an answer. All Erik really knew was that Raoul needed to be by his side. They were meant to be together. He felt some semblance of humanity whenever he was near the blonde.
Philippe's question might have been easier to answer if it weren't for the fact that Erik had stopped thinking of Raoul as that little boy so long ago. That innocence might have been able to save him from this awkward moment. It would have been easier if Erik could still be only shocked if Raoul were to kiss him again. But that wasn't possible. He saw Raoul for who he was now. Even the responses Raoul evoked were a mix of that time long ago and the person Erik had been rather forced into dealing with during his stay in the opera house.
His intentions?
He wanted to be anything and everything he could possibly be to Raoul. He wanted to be confidant, companion, friend, lover… He wanted it all, wanted to possess Raoul completely.
Yet, he couldn't. Philippe would always be in Raoul's life. He would have a piece of him that Erik would never be able to retrieve even if that were only the position of brother. He'd have to live with that and he found that it did not grate on his nerves as much as he thought it would.
"Erik. What do you want with my brother?" Philippe asked again. He could see the man actually struggling with himself. It was a relief, really. He knew he wasn't being fair. He was testing the man, but it was all for Raoul. In truth, it was really for both of them. Raoul still didn't remember and even if he did, who knew how he was going to react to Erik, to the person he'd cried endless nights over. It was different now; they were adults.
And Erik. Philippe could almost not fathom what this man had gone through. He honestly couldn't bear the thought of being the one to tear Raoul away from him once again. That expression had haunted him more than his face had, but Raoul's mournful wails probably hadn't helped.
"I want to be there for him." Erik stated simply. He couldn't elaborate, didn't want to. He was afraid that Philippe would immediately cut him out of Raoul's life if he knew the truth, that he was attracted to his brother. He should have been more worried about how Raoul would take to the news, but he could worry about that later.
Philippe arched an eyebrow, "Is that all?"
Uncertain as to whether lying was better than the truth, Erik shrugged, "I've only ever his best intentions in mind."
And Philippe believed him. "You would never hurt Raoul." He said more to himself than to Erik.
Still, Erik answered, "Never intentionally."
"And unintentionally? If your very presence hurt him, what would you do?" Philippe asked. This time pressing for an answer that he was waiting for.
Erik thought furiously. He'd never considered that. What if what was best for Raoul was for them not to be together? What if he ruined Raoul's life?
But he'd taken that path already. He hadn't returned when they'd been younger and had lived to regret it. He couldn't, wouldn't do that again. "I can't leave him. I would never leave him. Whatever was wrong, I'd find a way to fix it."
Though pleased with the answer, Philippe asked, "What means? Through murder?"
Erik met his eyes challenging, "If I have to."
They stared at each other for a few moments.
Philippe replied, "Not if you want to stay with him. If you are to remain in our household, then you are to live within society's laws."
"Like the Comte de Montmartre?" Erik scoffed, rolling his eyes. He paused. Did he hear Philippe correctly? "Stay in your household?" He asked.
"Yes, I offered. Did I not?" Philippe allowed himself to smile.
"You did, but…"
"I could have chosen to recant that statement, but I haven't."
Philippe didn't add that though Erik might have assuaged some of his more immediate fears about him and the probability of hurting Raoul even more, there were other questions still to be answered. They could only be answered once they found Raoul though. The biggest hurdle he could think of was how Raoul was going to react. If he reacted poorly, then Philippe was going to have a problem keeping the ghost away.
In all truths, he would prefer a confrontation between them. Philippe thought that if Raoul and Erik finally did yell about everything in their past it would be better. That way, Raoul would stop being depressed. He would not continue in the downward spiral Philippe had noticed him going into before he suggested the Opera Populaire; he would hopefully be happy in a way he hadn't been able to be in years.
Philippe just couldn't help but worry what exactly that happiness would entail.
o.o.o
"Vicomte," Madame Giry called through the door. She was holding a tray of food. When she received no response, she glanced at Meg who opened the door for her. They entered, stopping short near the entrance.
"Where is he?" Meg asked.
The room was empty; the blanket missing and the window open. Meg ran to close the window when a particularly strong gust of wind blew in a large amount of snow.
Madame Giry placed the tray down on the table. "Christine!"
Christine entered the room. "Yes?"
"Where's the Vicomte?"
She gasped and looked around as though he were just hiding. "He was here when I left him. I don't know."
"We have to go," Madame Giry urged them out the door. "He's still ill and with this weather, he may not make it very far."
o.o.o
Finally, a carriage.
Raoul was freezing. He was glad that he'd taken the blanket with him because he didn't think he'd have made it this far otherwise. He could barely see around the flurry of snow.
Erik answered, Hurry up. I think you're getting more sick.
Raoul rushed up to the driver that was just coming down.
"Excuse me, Monsieur," Raoul had to yell to be heard over the blowing wind.
The driver didn't see Raoul until he practically bumped into him. He stopped, not looking very happy to be in this snow.
"Can you take me to Paris?" Raoul could understand this man's sentiment.
The man let out a harsh bark of laughter that carried through the wind. Shaking his head, he replied, "No one's traveling right now. We're in the middle of a storm. Go find lodging for the rest of the night."
Leaving without another word, the man led his horses down the street. Raoul watched him go, all hopes of reaching home before the next day leaving.
You'd never have been able to make it to Paris in just one night. Erik pointed out.
Raoul frowned, We could have tried.
Let's go back. Erik said, noting the fact that Raoul was swaying on his feet.
I'm not swaying. It's the wind. He sounded defensive. Raoul chose a direction and began to walk. He wasn't going to return to the room where Madame Giry and Christine were. They had kidnapped him. He couldn't stay there.
Erik suggested, Well, let's find some shelter then.
Raoul agreed. His hands and feet were going numb. Gathering the blanket tighter around him, he headed towards the alley between buildings so that he wouldn't be so exposed to the harsh winds.
I meant a room, not an alley.
Raoul ignored his comment. Why does this place look familiar?
Why does an alley look familiar? Erik clarified.
o.o.o
Progress had been considerably slowed by the weather and it took almost a whole day to travel what should have taken a few hours. Stopping at a few more villages without finding Raoul, Erik and Philippe were growing more agitated.
"If we're having problems traveling then they must be having problems as well, correct?" Philippe said optimistically.
He didn't mention the fact that he felt rather sorry for his driver. They'd been traipsing through France for almost a whole day and in this weather. When Erik hadn't been looking, he'd promised the driver that whatever place they arrived next, they'd stop for the night.
Erik didn't reply. He was too busy trying to contain his frustration. He wanted to hurt someone at the moment and this effort at self-restraint was not making him feel any better. At least the cold somewhat helped to calm him. It was too cold to use that much energy in being violent.
The carriage slowed to a stop. Erik and Philippe were quick to jump out regardless of the weather. Philippe gave the driver a small nod before the man drove away.
"Where is he going?" Erik yelled over the wind.
Philippe stood in the middle of the street, staring at the buildings that he saw.
"Philippe?" Erik called again. When he received no response, he looked around as well. He could barely see through the dark and snow, but when the wind died down just a little, he saw enough.
They were back. This was where it all started.
o.o.o
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End Chapter 30
Word count: 3,785
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A/N: Don't forget to R/R (Read and Review)!
Editing shoddy at best, but inundated with work. D:
o.o.o.o
Chapter review: Yes! They're in the same city now. Finally. And of course they would return to the same city.
You know what… no need to vote anymore. I know who the winner's going to be. Imaginary Friends continuation will definitely be following when this finally ends. You'd think I don't want them together with the rate this is going.