The day of Mel and Lindsey's anniversary, I over heard what Michael had said about me. To say that I was disgusted by it is an understatement. I loved the fact that even though we were broken up you still defended me.

When I saw you slug Mikey in honor of my name I knew that moment actions from you meant more to me than any of the romantic bullshit Ethan said to me. I knew that second I had made the biggest mistake in my whole life and I had to change that.

I knew that you truly loved me and I was going to do everything in my power to try to get you back. I was going to have to work hard to get you to forgive me for the lies, the deceit, and the pain I caused you but I was not going to stop until you were back in my life.

After they threw you out of the party I told Ethan I was also ready to go for I had my fill of the family; I did not want to deal with them anymore. The truth of the matter was I did not want to look at Michael considering I finally got to hear the truth from him.

I know Michael and I never really got along over the past couple years but I had always wished for your sake that one day we would get along. That night I felt true hate for Michael and I will never forgive him for what he said about me.

I know that you care about Michael so over the past two years I have never told you about the things he has said to me. When you finally knocked him down I felt that maybe you and I were finally on the same level and were finally ready to move past the dependent bullshit that is Michael Novonty.

I know it is a silly thought but that is how I felt at that moment in time.

So we go back to Ethan's apartment and I grab my duffel bag and I start to pack. He asks me "where the fuck do you think your going?" I try to explain to him that we were a mistake and that I was leaving him.

He kept going on and on about how our destiny is intertwined with each other's and we were each other soul mates. He kept saying that deep down I was truly in love with him and that it only takes time to realize it. I tried telling him that leaving you was the biggest mistake in my life and I was going to do everything I could to make it up to you.

He would not stop with the bullshit. He went on and on about everything all the stupid things he has ever said to me. How I would never get those things from you.

I laughed at him and told him that words meant nothing in the big picture...that in my life I wanted the truth not some sugar coated bullshit. I grabbed my bag and set it by the door. I turned and told him that I was sorry for hurting him but my place was by your side and no one else's.

Sheer rage consumed him instantly. His eyes glossed over and he screamed that I was not going to leave him for the biggest whore in Pittsburgh. I started to laugh and I explained that you may share your body with everyone every night but I received the one thing that no one ever got and that was...your heart.

Unfortunately, I did not see his fists flying before it connected with my face-right where Hobbs struck me a year prior. By the time I woke up I was stripped and tied to the bed.

He told me that I was his and I was going to be with him no matter what, always. He pulled out his cock and told me to suck him off. There was nothing I could do I tried so hard to stop him. I refused him repeatedly by keeping my mouth closed as tight as I could. But then he went into the kitchen, grabbed a knife, held it to my throat and screamed at me to 'suck'.

I had no choice considering my hands were completely bound to the bed and my legs were chained, spread open. I open my mouth and he slid his dick inside of my mouth. I was really not ready for it and my teeth scraped across his dick.

He pulled out his dick and slugged my jaw. I could feel the blood starting to puddle in my mouth. I felt something in my mouth and I did not know what it was so I spit it out. As plain as day I see my molar covered in blood lying on the pillow.

He was even more enraged by that so he explained to me that he was going to teach me a lesson. I was absolutely terrified at the prospect of what he said. I felt his hands wrap around my neck and start to squeeze the life right out of me. I blacked out from lack of oxygen after a few minutes of him choking me.

When I woke again I was turned over and lying on my stomach. I had one of my socks shoved into my mouth with duct tape over it. I was truly afraid of what he was going to do.

Nothing happened for a really long time so I assumed that he had left. I pulled as hard as I could on the ropes that held my wrist but I could tell that it was useless. After what seemed like days Ethan returned but he had other people with him.

I could hear him telling them that I was the new bitch on the block, and it was time to show everyone who I truly belonged to. He lifted my head and strapped on a collar and a choke chain.

All of his friends were talking about how they could not wait to be inside of his new bitch and the wonderful things they planned on doing. They kept going on and on about how they couldn't wait for me to start squealing like a pig that I am. They were also excited about seeing my bitch body marked by a true master.

That is when I felt the first strike against my back. I was not sure what it was the only thing I know is it hurt like a mother fucker.

I screamed my heart out trying to alert someone what was happening to me, but it was to no avail. I am not exactly to sure how or who did it burn I could smell my skin burning and my ass was literally on fire.

That went on for hours, them beating me and then burning me. It must of excited them because I felt latex getting shoved inside of me. I know it was not going to be any where near enjoyable as I could hear Ethan saying "Open the fucking whore up for us. Shove your fucking fist in my new bottom bitch."

Now before that happened I always topped Ethan, I never let anyone else but you inside of me. What you told me the first night held true. Every time Ethan even attempted to top me I always thought of you. No matter how drunk I would get or even stoned I still thought of you, you were always there with me no matter what happened.

I was thankful for that when I felt whomever thumb go inside I blacked out completely. That is when I finally remembered our dance. I wish it was under a different circumstance but I was thankful I still remembered it. I remembered the way we sway to each beat of the song, I remembered the dip, and I especially remember everyone's face after you kissed me.

I always wondered what would of happened if Chris never did that to me. I knew that night things changed between us, I could tell that night was special because you paused before you kissed me in the garage.

Of all of our kisses that was the only one you ever paused on. In my mind's eye I replayed all the wonderful times we had spent together.

I remember the way you made love to me after Gus's first birthday. I remembered our ice cream kisses and how excited I was that you had asked me over.

Every time I had a new cock shoved inside of me I remembered another great time between us. I thought of all the different ways you fucked me on my 18th birthday. I remember the night in the hotel in New York, how passionate and insane you were that night.

Every moment was replayed over and over and over again. I was thankful all the happy times we had together.

The abuse I took from Ethan and his friends went on every night for weeks. He barely feed me so I did not have the strength to fight him.

Any time I needed to use the restroom I had to signal to him that I need to go. First he would punch and kick me then he would put a leash on me and then lead me into the bathroom.

Towards the last week he finally started to trust me that I would not run away. That is when he finally removed the collar from my neck. The very first chance I have ever had I tried to run away.

I had no clothed nor money but I did not care. Just as long as I finally got away from Ethan.

On the night I killed him I had enough of his bullshit and I could not take anymore. I snapped knowing that I had to get away from him to be able to see you again, to have you hold me and tell me that everything was going to be okay. I knew that I needed to see you smile and laugh, I had to see you holding Gus and looking at him with all the love in the world.

He caught me sneaking out and that is when he carved me up. That night I refused to be a victim again, I refused to be belittled like that again, and that is just one of the reasons I murdered him.

Alright story time is over, you may rant and rave now Brian.