It was nice to have an afternoon off with Morgan today. We were able to just sit around and play video games for the first time in what feels like forever. What's interesting to me is that my tastes have changed in the last year. I used to love all sorts of first-person shooter games – Call of Duty, Doom, Assassin's Creed and the like. But now, I find that those are scarier and not as much fun.
So, yesterday, Morgan and I played a bunch of weird games, games I wasn't sure I'd play before. We played a ton of Rock Band (not the best music, but the feeling of immersion of being a rock star is loads of fun), Mario Kart, Super Smash Brothers, and other games that we used to laugh at other people for playing. But, darn it, they're fun and we laughed and played and played. I've missed that kind of interaction.
We also talked about our annual Child's Play donation. It's so hard to find money to do those kinds of things. I want to be able to give more, but my salary doesn't really allow for that. We each decided to give $20 each. It's not a lot, but every little bit helps. We gamers have to look out for each other and do our best.
As much fun as the games were, I think I enjoyed the time with Morgan more. So often, it seems time with him gets lost in other places – sleeping, working, working my other job. He's covered for me so many times I've lost count. I wish there was something more I could do to show him how much I appreciate his friendship.
I guess thinking about Child's Play and Penny Arcade and how much money Gabe and Tycho have made. Why don't Morgan and I do that kind of thing? I mean, other than the fact that we can't draw and aren't funny. Why haven't we found some niche to exploit and make our fortune? I've got a degree from Stanford now, for crying out loud. And yet I'm stuck at Buy More.
What about Morgan? He wouldn't want to leave the store. At the very least, he'd want to follow me wherever I went. I want to be there for him and do something with him, but his vision can be small. And mine seems to be growing. But I owe him. I owe him big-time.
He's always been there for me. After the whole Stanford mess, he and Ellie were the only ones that I felt like I could really rely on. I can still rely on them. But I'm not sure they can rely on me anymore. I hate having to lie to them. I wish I could do more for them. I know it keeps them safe. Putting myself in danger to protect them is a way to define care and concern. I just wish I didn't have to lie to them.