Wahahaha chapter 11! The first part of this was actually supposed to be part of chapter 10, but I decided it would be nicer to shift it to chapter 11. Not that it made much of a difference for me, considering how I'm one of those writers who can't plan too far ahead…in other words, I only plan significant events…the rest are written as I go along. Wahaha snow-angel-anna has also updated, so go check it out.

Chapter 11- Confessions

Ren sat leaning against a tree, staring into the setting sun as he waited impatiently and somewhat nervously for Yoh's message. Just then, he felt leaves being scattered over him and he saw Lyn grinning at him mischievously.

"I'm sorry…I just couldn't resist the urge…you were so deep in thought you didn't even notice me sneaking away…what were you thinking about anyway?" Lyn asked, grinning.

Ren opened his mouth and was about to come up with an excuse when he suddenly felt his phone vibrate in his pants pocket. He took his phone out and saw the message he had been waiting for.

'We're ready. Oh and we saw the letter. It was so sweet. But what happened anyway?'

Ren let out a low growl when he saw the message. Those busybodies. He had specifically told them not to open the envelope. He was going to kill Yoh and Horo Horo.

"Hey!" Yoh greeted them when they entered the dining room. "You're just in time for dinner!" Yoh told them with a smile, gesturing towards the table, which had already been set for six. Ren noticed Jun sitting at the end of the table, opposite Anna.

Ren growled in exasperation when his sister gave him a knowing smile. It seemed that she too had been informed of the contents of the letter.

"Ren, we've already put your stuff in your room…" Jun said, continuing to smile at him knowingly. Lyn looked at him in surprise "Your room?" "Ren is going to be moving in with us as of today…" Yoh said, grinning. Lyn nodded thoughtfully, then sat down at the table opposite Yoh and Horo Horo. Ren sat down next to her, glaring at Yoh and Horo Horo furiously.

Lyn stared at the food while everyone began eating, and then she suddenly stood up. "On second thought…I have no appetite right now…" She said, walking to her room.

Ren stared at her disappearing back worriedly, then turned back when he felt someone tap his shoulder. "So…mind telling us what really happened?" Yoh asked, looking at him questioningly.

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Lyn slid her room door close behind her and blinked as she let her eyes adjust to the darkness. She felt fresh tears in her eyes, and she looked up at the ceiling and blinked in an attempt to force the tears back. When she felt that the tears were no longer threatening to fall, she straightened her head.

Lyn noticed three new objects on her table and walked towards it in curiosity. She switched on her table lamp and saw that the objects were actually three individual stalks of flowers. There was a red poppy, a yellow daffodil and a white narcissus. Then, Lyn noticed an envelope under the three stalks of flowers.

Lyn took the envelope and opened it slowly, wondering what was inside. When she opened the letter, what met her eyes was a whole page of Ren's handwriting.

Hey…Lyn…I know you are feeling upset right now. I'm not very good at comforting people face to face, so I decided to write a letter instead. Yoh was the one who helped me get the flowers.

Anyway, all three flowers are of a different species, and have different meanings behind them. However, they all have one common message. They can be used as a consolation in time of death.

I know you are upset about your parents' deaths, no matter how you try to hide it. I felt so helpless when I saw how devastated you were by your parents' deaths. There you were, crying your heart out, and yet there was nothing I could do to lessen your pain.

To lose a loved one. That feeling must be terrible, like you're drowning, desperately fighting to reach the surface of the water, and yet there is something pulling you back.

Maybe I don't really understand what you are feeling. But I want to try to understand, if only you would let me. Don't try so hard to pretend that everything is fine when you don't really feel that way.

Maybe you think that by hiding your pain, you will be able to lessen your friends' worry. But that isn't the case at all. In fact, by hiding your feelings from us, you are actually making us worry even more.

'Is Lyn really ok? She looks so happy. And yet, somewhere deep inside, I know that she's hurting so bad.' This is the thought which crosses my mind every time I see you force a smile.

I'm so afraid. I fear that if you keep bottling your pain up, you might just crack from the pressure. Why do you persist in hiding your pain from us?

Are you trying to prove that you are strong, because the one who killed your parents might be watching? So you don't allow yourself to cry, and you don't share your problems with us?

'It takes courage to dare to cry openly. True courage.' That is one thing that I have learnt, thanks to Yoh's friendship.

So please. Stop hurting yourself further this way. I want to be able to comfort you, and be there for you. But I can't unless you allow me to.

I'm sure Kaede and the rest are worried about you too. Especially Kaede. I can see that you are like a little sister to her. And she kept looking at you over dinner last night. She's worried. She can sense that something happened to you, but she doesn't know what.

There's no need to protect yourself
From those who are your friends
We want to know your tears
So share with us your fears

Don't build a wall around your heart
To keep us from understanding your pain
We want to comfort you and support you
Be there for you when you fall

Hope you like that poem...it was just a short one, and maybe I'm not really good at writing poems.

If this letter seems very awkward, I apologise. Right now, inside of me, is such a mess of emotions. Half of them are very alien to me. And besides, I was never good at expressing my emotions, even in words.

But somehow, when it's with you, I seem to be able to open up more easily. I just find it easy to talk to you.

Cheer up, ok? I really hope to see you smiling soon. A REAL smile. One of true happiness

我愛你,

Ren.

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"…when we got back to her house, we found it in flames. The situation seemed bleak. I think that somewhere deep inside, she was hoping against hope that her parents were alright, that they were still safe and sound. But when she saw their bodies, the last of her hope was destroyed…"

Ren paused, remembering how anguished Lyn had been. She had hung on so desperately to that last trace of hope, only to have it destroyed so mercilessly.

At that time, she had fought with so much anger and hatred. It had been the first time he had seen Lyn's face so twisted with rage, all trace of innocence and joy gone. The first time, and he honestly hoped that it would be the last.

Her battle with the one who had killed her parents. Her struggle within herself. Her devastation and sorrow. All the different emotions Lyn had felt, the different faces he had seen. Those were to be kept between the two of them, unless she chose to share it with the rest.

Ren took a deep breath before continuing. "Lyn cried a bit, and then we gave her parents a simple burial. That was about it."

"And her bandaged hand?" Yoh asked, his face serious for once.

"A result of her frustration. She vented it on a tree." Ren answered simply, hiding his own emotions.

"And who did…" Horo Horo asked, a stunned expression on his face.

"I have no idea. He looked about…two years older than Yoh. Which makes him about four years older than Lyn." Ren ended abruptly, his mouth gaping.

Could it be? No. What were the chances of such a coincidence? And yet, there were certainly similarities between them. And it would explain Lyn's hesitation to kill him.

Is he, her brother?

But…she told me that he had died…

And yet, there are those undeniable similarities,

And it would explain so many things.

If he really is her brother.

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"Ren…Hey Ren!" Horo Horo called worriedly, shaking Ren from his thoughts. Ren blinked in surprise, looking around the room for awhile as if surprised to be there.

"Are you alright, dude? You looked really…scared or something back there…" Horo Horo asked, peering at Ren in concern.

"I'm not scared! Tao Ren fears nothing but fear itself. Not even death!" Ren exclaimed, scowling. Yoh stared at Ren in shock before grinning. "Wow, Ren. You sure switched back to your old self quickly. I kinda liked the softer, kinder Ren."

"Whatever…" Ren muttered, standing up and walking towards the stairs. "Where are you going?" Jun asked, looking at him curiously. Ren stopped, but did not turn to face Jun and the rest. "What do you think? I'm going to sleep…" He snapped before walking forward.

"One last thing!" Yoh called, grinning. "When you signed off in that letter. There was a Chinese character which looked like the Japanese kanji for love. So does it mean the same thing?"

Ren flushed slightly as he whipped his head around, and tried to hide it with a scowl. "Don't push it. I haven't given you your due for reading the letter when I specifically told you not to read it…" Before Ren could continue, Anna interrupted.

"Actually, you told me to tell Yoh not to open the letter. You didn't say that he was not allowed to read it. So I opened it for him. Yoh didn't open the letter, so he didn't do anything wrong."

"Damn you! That letter was personal! And that character…has nothing to do with love. It's different from the Japanese kanji. It means friendship." Ren growled in annoyance.

"Oh stop denying it, Ren. That character means love, and you know it. Why don't you admit your feelings for Lyn already…" Jun said teasingly, Pai Long nodding his agreement. Ren's whole face reddened and he scowled, turning around and walking up the stairs.

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Ren slowly slid the door open, slipping into Lyn's room silently and gently sliding the door shut behind him. When he saw that her bed was empty, a sudden fear that something had happened to her gripped his heart.

Ren's eyes darted around the room, and rested on a figure sleeping on the table. He walked over towards the table and saw that Lyn was sleeping on her table, a peaceful smile on her face. Ren smiled and gently ran his fingers through her hair. The silly girl had fallen asleep at her table, and she hadn't even switched her table lamp off.

As Ren reached for the switch to turn the lamp off, he noticed a piece of paper scrunched up in Lyn's hand. He smiled when he saw that it was the letter he had written for her. If that was the reason behind her peaceful smile, then it had been well worth the effort.

Ren considered carrying Lyn back to her bed, but decided against it for fear of waking her up. He took the covers from her bed and draped it over her shoulders gently, then took a step back and smiled again when he saw the peaceful smile on her face.

So this was what love was. Such an immense feeling towards a single person, so that you would sacrifice your life to protect her, and so you only wanted to see her safe and happy.

Now that Ren thought about it, he had no idea when he had started having feelings for her. Maybe it had been on the first night after they had met, when she had shown how accepting she was. She hadn't been bothered by his past, her only concerns being the present and the future.

Or maybe it had been the night when he had overheard her conversation with her father, when he had learnt of her dark secret. Whatever it was, the fact remained that the Ren standing where he was today, would not have come into existence had it not been for her.

He had fallen for her, fallen hard. And yet, Ren was satisfied. He had never thought he would say this, but, he was glad he had met her, and fallen for her.

Just then, a cold wind blew through the open window above the desk. Ren reached across to shut the window, and froze when he heard Lyn shifting in her sleep. "Thank you…Ren…" She murmured, looking at him with her eyes.

Her eyes, which gave away her every emotion. Her eyes, which made hiding her emotions impossible. Those eyes were now shining with life. When Ren looked into her eyes, he felt as if he was surrounded by many stars, shining gently, giving him hope and the strength to carry on.

Ren smiled at her, and ruffled her hair playfully. "Well, if you're going to sleep, you should sleep on your bed next time, yea?" He said, grinning as he shut the window.

Lyn nodded gratefully, then walked over to her bed and clambered in under the covers. "Thank you for the letter. It made me feel much better. I'm fine now. Honestly." She said, grinning at him before she lay down.

Ren looked at her, and decided to question her about his identity another day. Seeing how at peace she was now, he simply didn't have the heart to bring up something so serious.

"Umm…about the letter…" Ren murmured, flushing slightly, unsure if he should explain his feelings for her.

"I know. I understand some Chinese. My mother was from China." Lyn replied grinning, her eyes reflecting the light of the moonbeams flowing into the room.

Ren thought about it, and cursed himself for not realising it sooner. Tsukiko had had a distinct Chinese accent when she spoke.

"But…why…what did I do to deserve your love?" Lyn asked, looking at him, her eyes trembling with uncertainty.

Ren thought hard. He himself was unsure of when he had first developed feelings for Lyn, so how was he supposed to tell her why?

"Because you are you." Ren answered simply, and was surprised at how such a simple reply summed up his reasons for loving Lyn so well.

"Huh?" Lyn asked, sitting up and scratching her head in confusion. Ren smiled gently and sat down next to her on the bed.

"I won't say that it's because of your voice, or because of your smile. I won't even say it's because of your bubbly personality and your sensitivity. Because, if I loved you for those reasons, I would stop loving you when you are lying unconscious on a bed. After all, when you are unconscious, I can neither hear your voice, nor see your smile. I would no longer be able to say that you are so full of life, nor feel your concern."

Ren flushed, and took a deep breath before continuing. "That's why. I love you simply because you are you. And no matter what happens, you will always have a special place in my heart. You are the first person for whom I have felt this way. And you will be the only one."

Lyn sat next to Ren in silence, gripping the bed sheet tightly within her fists and biting her lips. "I don't understand what this is that I feel for you. I think that it's love, but I don't dare to let it be so. I'm afraid that he would do something to you."

Ren put an arm around Lyn's shoulder, pulling her towards him. "Don't worry. I will protect you." Lyn gave Ren a worried look, and he smiled encouragingly. "Have more faith in me. I am the Shaman King after all…"

"Thank you, Ren…" Lyn murmured, and Ren smiled gently, taking his hands off her shoulder as he stood up and walked towards the door, sliding it open. "You should rest…" He said before he walked out of the room, sliding the door shut behind him.

I would protect you with my life,
Even if I was not the Shaman King.
If I had been born a human,
I would still fight for you.
For you are my love.
My one and only love.

-我愛你 IS the 'wo ai ni' you always see in fics. (For those who don't know Chinese) But I'm sure most of you figured that out already. Haha

I only have one thing to say. It was so sweet. I enjoyed writing it. Amazing, considering how it's FLUFF and I used to have writers blocks when it came to fluff.