The Engagement

Chapter 2 – Britney Spears: Oops I did it again

He looked at me for a moment, as if weighing his options. Would he use one of those easy lines that made me giddy and gullible? I began to grow impatient with every second of silence that passed between us.
I could feel the tightness begin to increase in my stomach and for a moment I felt as though I were about to toss that delicious cup of coffee and delectable bagel right into his lap projectile-vomit-style. It was mere moments before I was able to relax because he cocked his head to the side and raised a dark eyebrow at me. Damn him. Why'd he have to look so magnificently rugged and manly in nothing but those jeans? Why did his endless, cobalt blue eyes seem to capture my gaze so effortlessly and hold me hostage? That is correct, hostage. I was trapped as my heartbeat skyrocketed to dangerous palpitations that I was sure my poor heart was not in any shape to withstand.
During my inner, and quite dramatic monologue, I missed his patent 'lean in and catch her when she's zoned out' move. The next thing I knew, his rough hands were gently pulling my face towards his as he stared none-too-subtly into my eyes.
Needless to say, but I will anyway, I was caught completely off-guard when he uttered the single phrase I didn't realize I'd been waiting to hear for such a long time.
"Run away with me?"
The way he said it made him seem so vulnerable, as if I could possibly hurt his feelings and maybe even smash his hopes and dreams with one blonde moment and a stupid, garbled answer.
My inner-devil chuckled a little before recognizing the seriousness of the situation and 'poof-ing' out of the picture.
Instead of laughing at the situation and his expression, I did the only thing I could do; I played it like I was an 84-year old woman who was hard of hearing, aka my grandma.
"What?" There seemed to be no stopping the stupidity streak I was currently substituting for my A game.
"Don't play stupid, Serena. I said run away with me. I have to go to France for two weeks, and I want you to take off with me. It wouldn't be that hard- just take some vacation time or have your boss contact you via email. I just-" I had to stop him there. He was beginning to ramble and it could only get more embarrassing for the both of us if he were to continue.
"Hold on, Dare. That's crazy. I can't just rush off to the other half of the world because you have to go on a business trip." Was I getting hysterical? My vocal chords were starting to get a little sore. I hoped I wasn't hitting notes only dogs could hear again.
"You'll love it. We'll get to roam the cities and enjoy the nightlife. I think it'd be a good thing for us to both get away."
"But I don't think-" Eeek, his hand seemed to slide so effortlessly over my parted lips that I felt like a small child being shushed by her heavy-handed and slightly perverted uncle.
Then again, I am not used to being man-handled and ordered around.
But I cannot deny that it seems to be something I could definitely get used to if I got to stare at this hunk all day.
"Good. Don't think, just go home and pack. We'll leave tomorrow afternoon." Oh those tantalizing lips hovered over mine just outside of reach and I wanted to stamp my foot in frustration.
"How am I supposed to justify going to Paris, with you, to-" I had to stop there. The little trance he'd pulled me into seemed to shatter into a million pieces of confetti without the merriment and I was back in reality, still on the couch and very much engaged.
He noticed it immediately. It wasn't as if I were a master at hiding my emotions.
"Just say you're going over to meet an account personally." His line was smooth and his hands were no longer gentle. They clamped onto each arm and held on, as if he knew I was contemplating bolting. The idea was intriguing and I silently calculated the strength and speed it would take to escape into the hallway or down the fire escape. A slight shake rattled me from my thoughts and I refocused onto Darien. I did not understand how it could be possible for me to get so caught up in the feelings he evoked. I was usually direct, level-headed and calm. He turned me into a catholic school girl who'd just had sex and was scared to death it was written on her forehead, better yet, written on a post-it that was somehow secured to the back of her cardigan without her knowledge until the next day when she opened her locker.
"Terrence is not an idiot." I couldn't help but shoot back, getting angry at the implication that I'd become engaged to a Neanderthal. The firm grip that had hold of my upper arms tightened and he jerked me toward him so that my legs slid down the leather couch and my feet dangled helplessly.
"Terrence should be history. It's your friends I'd be more worried about, if I were you." The anger that reflected in his eyes momentarily frightened me. I'd never seen him angry, frustrated, or even the slightest inconvenienced. It took a split-second for that anger to fade and he loosened his nearly painful grip. I was lowered to his chest, arms coming around me to encircle my upper torso and hold me gently there. I turned my head to the side and rested it upon his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat and breathing. "I'm sorry." He said after a few minutes of silence had passed between us. I slowly wound my arms up around his shoulders and let one hand dip into his dark, silky hair. The physical need was about to takeover for the emotional and I struggled against the need to feel complete and the urge to flee. It wasn't everyday you had someone ready to fight for you, nor offer to whisk you off to some foreign country on a vacation that promised romance and seduction.
I wanted that romance, my heart screamed for it, but my mind was tugging against that nonsensical dream and I knew I had to make a decision fast. Even though everything in me wanted to tell Terrence to kiss off, I knew it was not the right choice. I needed to be diplomatic, weighing the options and their outcomes more seriously than I would the type of lipstick to wear to a business dinner, though that decision itself can sometimes take more than a few hours.
"Serena?" The again gentle hands wove their way through my hair and I closed my eyes, content for the moment to lean into his embrace and feel comforted. There was no way he could understand how hard this decision was. He didn't have anyone else's feelings to consider other than his own. My choice would have a direct effect on my engagement, my job, and my relationship with my friends.
My friends, how could I have forgotten? Raye and Amy were rooting for Terrence, campaigning and singing his praises for the months that we dated and even after we moved in together. Mina and Lita retained far more reserved positions concerning my relationship with Terrence. Mina had given me a knowing look the night of the Valentine's Day party and Lita had been schmoozing up to me with martini after martini, practically parading every single man in front of me. Now that I think about it, they were far more concerned with me ending my relationship with Terrence than even I. There was no mistaking the coincidence. Lita and Mina had deliberately invited Darien to the party to distract me. I'd never felt so manipulated. Darien must have noticed the change, his grip tightening once again as I moved to distance myself.
"Don't." was his request, though it resembled an order the way it sounded from his lips.
"I have to think about this, Darien. It's not an easy decision. I'm putting my friends, family, my engagement and my future on the line here." I'm sure I was being a little melodramatic, but that didn't make the decision any easier. My engagement to Terrence was on the chopping block, whether he knew it or not. But the truth was, Darien really had nothing to do with it. In the very beginning I'd been leery of starting a relationship with Terrence, of moving in, or even accepting his proposal (not that I officially said yes, mind you).
Darien's presence and characteristic effect of turning my willpower into jell-o served to only add another nail of doubt in the coffin that was my relationship with Terrence.
"Why isn't it easy? He doesn't deserve you, Serena. You don't even love him."
To say I got a little upset would be an understatement. That last comment instigated a snowball effect and it took only seconds for my anger to lash out. How could he know of my affection? He didn't earn my love, he hadn't put a ring on my finger and promised to love, cherish, and provide for me. He didn't lay next to me at night (not for lack of trying to get me back into bed with him) and hold me and talk about our future, what our kids would look like, or for that matter – how his day was at work and ask me about my own.
Not that Terrence did all of those things, mind you, but it was a good start to what kind of man I wanted to be with; what kind of man I felt I needed. Terrence was a far cry from perfect, but he was honest and deserved my consideration and respect. He did not deserve me sneaking behind his back.
"I need to go, Darien." I mumbled as I stood from the couch and shuffled to the door to put on my shoes while sliding my previously forgotten sweater over my head. He had some nerve.
"So I'll see you at 2 o'clock tomorrow then?" His intense gaze stirred the butterflies in my stomach and my hand felt for the doorknob of the front door. He was so handsome in his jeans and trademark white t-shirt leaning against the armrest of the couch. I wanted to say the hell with my pride and jump him right then. He must have sensed my weak-will and he slowly rose from the couch like a large jungle cat and padded over to stop inches from my body which was by now pressed firmly against the door's surface in protest to his advance. Heartbeat triple-timing in my chest, I fought to maintain control of my breathing and look unaffected on the outside. I knew he was waiting for a response, and my dry lips cracked open, tongue moving to moisten them as I struggled to say something intelligent.
"I-… Darien…" I looked at him helplessly as his lips descended upon mine and it was fireworks as they say after that.
Two hours later found me laying face down in his cologne scented, navy sheets. His immobile form lay next to me, one tanned, muscular arm draped over my back, securing me to him. I would blame this encounter on the wine I consumed earlier at the luncheon-turned-afternoon party. I didn't want to face reality yet, wanted to keep all the thoughts of doubt from swimming into my mind, so I pretended to be asleep. My initial assumption would be that he'd leave me alone, wanting to give me the space I needed to collect myself. But, you know what happens when you assume. It wasn't too long after I pretended to be asleep that warm lips and knowing hands made their trek down my body and I surrendered to the sensations, knowing this was only a taste of what he was capable of, and what would happen if I went away with him.
Another hour later found me in a state of mild confusion and misery. My body seemed to be protesting against my mind and I was not making progress on my mission to leave Darien's apartment. I wasn't even out of his bed or his embrace. I vaguely wondered if Darien possessed the power to read minds as he ran his hands through my hair and let the strands slide through his fingers with a mesmerized look on his face.
"You know, you're just delaying the inevitable."
The comment caught my attention and I fully opened my half-hooded eyes to meet his intent gaze. Here it was, the ultimate showdown.
For a moment, I imagined the possibility of ignoring the comment all together, pretending the entire notion of running off to Europe had completely slipped my mind. I'll have to say that the idea was immensely appealing. It was, however, a cowardly way to address the situation and I did not need another mental diatribe on the virtues of women to be stuck in my head courtesy of my mother.
Ah, my mother, she seemed to be the only voice of reason in this situation. Funny, the woman had been married for damn near thirty years and always seemed to have some type of dating advice for me. That is, except when it came to Terrence. Sure, she had warned me not to move in with him, but I had brushed that off as her good old Christian upbringing talking. Sometimes, I wondered if she'd known all along.
The faint ringing of my cell phone made me realize I had been looking straight through him as he'd stared at me, still no comment on his earlier statement. The ringing grew louder, daring one of us to move, shattering the connection as we both searched out the annoying device.
My cell was piping away from its position underneath the bed in my discarded jeans pocket. I easily retrieved it and slid the phone open to check the caller ID. Luck was not on my side today. Darien returned to his position beside me on the bed and lazily kissed his way up and down my neck taking more time in some areas than necessary. I continued to stare at the communication device like it was an alien child, too scared to look away but too afraid to give it what it wanted. Terrence's picture was smiling at me and I wondered briefly if he had guess where I was.
"You should answer that." Darien murmured as he turned his attentions lower. I gasped and pushed him away with a free hand as my other hand answered the call and held it up to my ear.
"Hello?" I winced, my voice was a little husky from my night session. It had been awhile since I'd been so vocal.
"Serena, honey, are you okay?" Terrence's worried voice flooded my ear and I immediately tensed.
"I'm fine. Just..." I floundered for an excuse and looked at Darien before answering, "Had a little too much wine at the get together this afternoon. I'm over at Mina's." Darien grinned, but I rolled onto my side away from his handsome face and incredible body to help me think straight. Instantly, I knew I'd made a mistake. Turning my back had not been a good idea. I felt his warm hands on my back, my neck, sliding lower with each passing second. I fought to keep my breath even.
"Oh." Terrence's confused voice floated somewhere in my mind and I struggled to stay with reality. "Will you be coming home, it's getting late? I have to leave early tomorrow for that trip I mentioned on the way home. My boss called a few minutes ago to confirm my travel arrangements. I have to be in Madrid tomorrow evening." At my silence Terrence continued, mistaking my pause in conversation as anger. "I know you don't like being alone for such a long period of time, but I'll be back in three weeks. Jeremy says this is the last time I have to leave for so long. I'm just handling some last minute negotiations before we sign all the necessary final contracts. I'll be home before you know it!" I bit my lip to fight back a moan, Darien's hands working their seductive magic and his even more impressive lips following.
"I'll be okay. I got a call from Sarah on my way to Mina's earlier. She has the flu and asked if I could step in for her tomorrow. She was supposed to go to Nice for one of her large accounts, but I said I'd step in for her. I hope you don't mind, but now it'll be perfect since we'll both be gone." I rushed to finish the sentence and roughly sunk my free hand into Darien's dark locks. He slowly crawled back up the bed and grinned, returning to his original task of leaving me speechless and craving more.
"Oh," Terrence seemed surprised, but I was already paying such little attention to him that I didn't mind. My eyes were closed, fighting not to give in to the all consuming hunger Darien seemed to evoke in my body. "Well, okay, honey. Please be careful and have a safe trip. I'll call you when I land in Madrid. You shouldn't try to come home tonight, its a little late and I don't think a cab-ride across town is the best idea. Maybe we could meet in London at the end of our trips and spend a few days there together."
"Mhmm, sounds great. G'night." I hung up the phone and tossed it across the room. It clattered to a halt in corner, hitting the wall and knocking the battery out. Darien's deep chuckle sounded from behind me. I whirled on him, not entirely sure how upset I was or if I was even upset at all.
"Are you trying to KILL me?" I slipped from his grasp, finding it harder to evade him when my body was yearning to be under him.
"No harm, no foul. It's not like he noticed." He settled himself on his side, leaning over me and running his hand through my hair. I began to feel a little more lightheaded as the moments passed. "So..." he drawled and leaned further into me, the contact of our bare skin sending tingles down my spine "you're coming with me?" He looked so vulnerable in that moment I could only nod, not wanting to say or do anything that could possibly ruin it. His lips were on mine in a flash, driving all the doubt from my mind as we tangled under the covers. "Mine." he murmured before we were both lost.
I resurfaced into reality some hours later, the early morning sun shining in through the open gap in the curtains. I attempted to twist away from the sun's bright rays and found it next to impossible and I came into direct contact with another body. As I fought to get my bearings, my eyes flew open and I sighed in relief as I took in the sight of Darien's sleeping form. He was positively, heart-breakingly handsome with his dark features, jet black hair in a messy disarray, dark brows relaxed against a sinfully beautiful face.
I remembered a morning some months back when I had woken next to him and vowed it to be the last. I had wanted to escape before he realized he did not want me and left me.
I felt the sudden urge to flee, panic instantly taking over where the security of his warmth did not permeate, my heart.
Slowly, so as to not wake him, I slid from his loose grasp and searched around on the floor for my clothing. Sure enough, I located my bra and underwear with ease but the rest of my clothes were evading me. Where were my jeans and my sweater, surely I couldn't have been that distracted to have lost them.
I gave up my search for them when I spotted Darien's open closet a few feet away from my crouched position. I darted for the door, yanking a dark shirt from its hanger. Hastily, I pulled the soft fabric over my head and was satisfied when the material draped down to mid-thigh. After my initial task of being clothed had been completed, I softly padded out the door, casting one quick glance at the slumbering form of Darien. He lay in the same position I had left him, arm extended over the spot my body had occupied.
I shuffled into the kitchen, quietly locating the essentials for coffee and set to my task of finding the rest of my clothing after a pot was brewing. I located my jeans dangling off the back of an arm chair and my sweater was crumpled on the floor by the door. I collected the articles quickly, making an effort to tidy up his living room in the process. His divested clothing was close to my own and I went about tossing throw pillows back into their respective places and righting the tilted lampshades. A couple of picture frames were scattered on the floor, and I assumed that had happened when we'd bumped into the side table in our frenzy.
Sex with Darien was always something different in my book of experiences. The passion we created everytime was an entirely new experience for me, and while his intensity sometimes scared me silly, I knew I was a moth to his flame in this scenario. I needed to just fly straight into the blazing inferno and hope I came out alive. Sure he'd burn me, but I'd been burned before and lived to tell the tale.
Once my task had been completed and there was no evidence of our, um, activities I returned to the kitchen and poured myself a mug of steaming coffee. I cuddled on the couch with my mug and a book that had been resting on the coffee table. So engrossed was I in the plot, I did not hear Darien leave his room. Warm hands slipped through my hair and tipped my head backwards to meet his waiting lips. I suppressed a gasp and carefully put my mug on the coffee table, the book fell to the floor forgotten.
"You should probably go get packed." he murmured a few minutes later having traded his previous position for a space on the couch.
"We could leave later." I suggested, temporarily enjoying my position of power. He grinned at my idea before shifting so I was suddenly below him, his large frame edging out any venue of escape, should I feel the need to make a quick getaway.
"Are you implying you'd rather head back to the bedroom, Miss Christainsen?" His tone was delightfully husky and I squirmed slightly under his piercing gaze. "That is exactly what I'm implying." I muttered before lifting my face to his. I wasn't sure what had brought on this change of mind, but I didn't want to analyze it or the consequences at the moment. Apparently, neither did he. But four hours later, I had been whisked to my apartment and just as quickly whisked to the airport.
I had a sneaking suspicion he was afraid I would come to my senses if he let me have a moment to collect myself.
When we were on the plane and the door shut securely behind us he released his hold on my waist and motioned for me to settle into my seat.
I closed my eyes and leaned back in the plush seat while Darien ordered us drinks from his private stewardess. I heard her smooth retreat and offered Darien a glance. He was staring directly at me, leaning back in his chair to afford himself a better view.
"What?" I resumed my nonchalant position and slouched a little farther down in my seat, attempting to get comfortable.
"Nothing." was his quick reply. I could feel the grin in his voice.
"Out with it already." I was getting impatient. He had kept a hand on me the entire afternoon and now that I was finally free of his hand, his gaze was wrapped around me just as firmly as his hand.
"It's nothing, really." His relieved expression sewed it shut for me.
"Then if it really is nothing then why not tell me?" I was on the edge of my seat, ready to lunge at him. It felt like I was the clueless freshman with a post-it on her back that said 'slut' or 'nerd' that I could not see.
"Calm down, Serena." His gaze drifted over my posture and I pursed my lips in frustration.
"Just tell me, Darien. I'm on the plane and we're thirty thousand feet in the air."
He seemed comforted by that fact and visibly relaxed.
"Well, you are trapped now." he muttered and rubbed his eyes.
"Darien…" I was practically whining now. I sounded pathetic but there seemed to be no avoiding it.
"I suppose it doesn't make any difference now or later."
Straight out of a cheesy romance novel, I waited with baited breath.
"I'm dying, Serena."
I felt as if I'd been hit by a truck.
"WHAT?" I was out of my seat in a flash, throwing myself into his waiting arms.
And his rich laughter turned my concern and fear into anger.
"I was only kidding, Serena. Nothing is wrong. Everything is fine. We'll be in Paris in a few hours and from there we'll go to Avignon, Bordeaux, Chartres and anywhere else you want to go."
I smiled and felt myself relax as his arms wove around me and one of his expert hands delved into my hair that hung loose to my shoulder blades.
I noticed his clouded expression but decided against bringing up that particular matter. In hopes of shutting out my conscience for more than two minutes and letting myself feel, I sighed deeply and snuggled further into his embrace. Wrapped in the arms of possibly the most perfect man in the world I was spontaneously flying farther than I ever had before, leaving caution and reason in my dust. For a moment, before I closed my eyes and surrendered to the feeling of happiness, I wondered if I had been waiting for him to find me all along. As if in perfect synchronization I lifted my face to his as he dipped down for me.
I promised myself, in his private plane, secured safely in his arms, that I would make the most of this vacation, even if I had to say goodbye afterwards. I quite possibly needed him like a drug addict needed their fix, and I wanted to have one last hit before I quit him cold turkey and went to rehab. Maybe it was selfish, maybe it was incredibly stupid, but I knew I wanted him, and I needed this time with him.
The stewardess never came back with our drinks, but I did not notice until the flight was almost over.