Chapter 2

"That sounds like a complicated case, Shaun," Mariah said on the phone. "So tell me, how do they do the DNA profile thing again?"

Mariah strained to listen as Shaun explained on the other end before stopping her. "Hold on a sec."

Mariah put the phone down. "Leif, will you please turn that TV down? I can barely hear on the phone."

"Huh?" Leif asked, turning away from the screen.

"Do you even have your hearing aid in? And where are your glasses?"

"Um….in the room."

"One goes in your ear and the other goes on your nose," Mariah scolded. "Your dad paid good money for–"

"Yeah, I know," Leif rolled his eyes. "I'll go get them so I can look like a geek."

"They're to help you see the TV and read better, and your hearing aid helps you hear better so you don't blast out the neighborhood with all that noise. And don't roll your eyes at me, mister."

"Can I go over Mikey's?" he asked.

"Is your homework done?"

"Yessum."

"Then I guess it's all right. But don't give Montana any trouble."

"I won't!" Leif promised.

"And turn off the TV; your dad and I don't own stock in the electric company."

"Yeah, Mom."

Mariah went back to the phone. "Sorry about that. I had to deal with another Leif issue."

"He's growing up fast," Shaun chuckled. "Seems it wasn't long ago you just brought him home from the hospital."

"Yes, and I think compared to diapers and colic back then to nagging him to put in a hearing aid, do his homework and wear his glasses, I'll take the lesser of two evils. Lord knows what Brian and I will be dealing with when he gets to high school."

"I thought Leif had one of those internal hearing aids that no one can see."

"He does, and it cost Brian a fortune. But Leif complains it 'bothers' him sometimes. Luckily, he also knows sign language and is a lip reader."

"The ADHD….are the meds working?" Shaun wondered.

"They seem to be so far. I haven't gotten any more letters from school about him acting up, not yet anyway. And he's been going to group therapy, which I think helped some too. But I didn't tell his dad one thing."

"What's that?"

"Leif took apart Brian's good watch and tried to put it back together."

"Oh no!" Shaun cried.

"Actually, he put it back perfectly," Mariah said. "Nine years old and every tiny piece in place. The thing works better now than it did before Leif took it apart."

"Something tells me you may have a budding engineer on your hands."

"Perhaps. Funny thing, though, is I doubt he'd finished that before he'd gone on the medication. Nevertheless, the psychologist wants him tested."

"Tested? For what?"

"Oh, a basic intelligence test. I said I'd discuss it with his dad first before I gave them an answer. Leif's been through enough testing in his life since he was a baby; there's no point doing any more unless it was necessary. Right now, he's on his way over to Montana's to team up with Mike to drive her crazy."

A short time later:

Michael and Leif had finished playing some video games and ate pizza afterwards. They were now upstairs. Naomi had gone to play with some friends, Kira was working on a book report for school, and Mac was on her laptop, instant messaging a boyfriend.

"I can't believe your mom let us eat in the living room," Leif said. "Mine yells if Dad much as eats a bowl of cereal in ours."

"Mami's okay," Michael nodded. "She probably figures if Papi does dumb stuff, she may as well let us do them too."

He then pulled out Leif's eyeglass case. "What's this?"

"Just my dorky glasses. Mom made me take them. They make me look like a freak."

"Can I try them on?"

"You can have them."

"No, your mami would get mad. I'll just try them on."

Michael put them on and walked over to a mirror. "Hey, these look cool. I feel all funny, but they're cool."

"Yeah?"

"Uh huh. Did you know Papi has some?"

"No way!" Leif exclaimed.

"Yeah, he has two of them. He takes one of them with him when he travels and leaves the others here. Come on, I'll show you."

The two boys walked into the den, where Michael took something out of Paul's desk. "See?" He then put the glasses on.

Leif snickered. "Those look really goofy."

Just then, Kira has passed by the den. "Mikey!" she cried. "What are you doing in here? You know you could get in trouble if Mami catches you, especially if you're in Papi's desk!"

"Just showing Leif Papi's glasses," Michael answered.

"Well, put them back; nobody's supposed to be in his desk. I don't want you guys in trouble. Be glad it was me who came through here and not Mac. You know she would have snitched."

"Yeah, we know." Leif rolled his eyes.

"She's too busy with her creepy boys anyway," Michael added. "Todd said she's a skank."

"Mikey! Mami better not hear you talking like that."

"Well, he did," Michael nodded.

"What's a skank?" Leif asked.

"Never mind," Kira replied, putting her father's glasses back in the drawer. "Now both of you get out of here."

"Come on," Michael said. "Let's go find something else to do."

Meanwhile:

Mac had gone downstairs, on the phone to yet another friend and making plans for the coming weekend. Much as she loved her father, it drove her nuts the way Paul always grilled her friends, and she was grateful he would be away that weekend.

After assuring Montana that the event would be chaperoned (but didn't specify by whom), Mac had then proceeded to phone her friend Tonya and the two girls had been chatting away.

She had just gotten up to go to the kitchen for a soda as Leif was digging through some of Michael's things, looking for something for them to do, before pulling out some strange looking thing.

"Hey, Mikey, what's this?" he wondered.

"Oh, that's a joke. Wait a minute…..I have an idea. Give me that."

"What are you going to do?"

"Come here a minute; I'll tell you," Michael answered.

He proceeded to whisper in Leif's ear, nodding toward where Mac had been sitting. Both boys snickered, then went over to the chair, shoving the joke item under the cushion, then hiding just as Mac returned.

Just as she sat down, a noise resembling a loud fart filled the room, causing Mac to cry out and the boys to break out laughing.

"Mac farted!" Michael howled.

"LEIF KENDRICK AND MICHAEL LONDON, GET YOUR ASSES BACK HERE! I'm going to kill you, you two little bastards!" Mac yelled, then went back to her call. "I'll call you back, Tonya. First I need to rip apart some little boy and his evil blond midget of a friend."

Kira just passed through at that moment, barely keeping a straight face. "Seriously, you have gas issues, Mac. They make Beano for that stuff."

"Oh, you're hilarious, Sissy," Mac snapped. "Now where did those two shits go?"

"That way," Kira fibbed, pointing in the opposite direction, before quickly ushering the boys the other way.

"Thanks, Kira," Leif said, still giggling.