A Pet Squishy
Chapter 7: "Mini Menaces"
Three days later…
Lana was confused. Though she had no grasp of time she knew Thundercracker had been gone for much longer than usual—more than a couple days she guessed. He still hadn't returned. Not that she needed anything. She had plenty of food and water to sustain her for a year, but he'd never been away so long.
Before he left in such a hurry, he mentioned he was going into battle. The big question was with whom? Was he raiding more energy resources with the other Decepticons? If there was a battle was he destroyed or dead? Did robots really die or did they just shut off?
Lana scolded herself. "Why should I care if that giant metal jerk comes back or not?"
Her more logical side interjected, "Well if he DOESN'T come back you're going to be left in this stupid cage with no way to supply yourself if you run out."
"OR," her 'worst-case-scenario' side said, "That maniac Skywarp will come back and do God knows what to you!"
"Good points," she stated aloud even though she was arguing with herself.
Though she cursed herself for even thinking it, she actually wanted Thundercracker to come back. It was, after all, in her best interest.
Then, she heard the door open outside. Almost anxious she paused, waiting. But instead of the shaking footfalls of her master she heard the murmuring of voices. They were oddly soft and not great and booming like most of the robots she'd encountered. She couldn't hear the exact words, but she knew there were at least two voices conversing in the room. A suddenly glimmer of hope tickled her heart. Were they human? Had a rescue party somehow broke in and come for her? It was a huge stretch, but the voices didn't sound big enough to be Decepticons.
Urgently she banged on the transparent wall of her enclosure, shouting, "HEY! HEY! I'M HERE! I'M HERE! HEY!"
She continued to raise a ruckus until she heard a bang of metal outside of the closet. Immediately she stopped to listen.
"Yeah, I heard it over here." one reedy male voice announced.
"I don't hear nothin'." a second voice stated.
The first voice hissed statically, "Shh. It was comin' from in there!"
"You're so full of slag Rumble! I THOUGHT we were lookin' for Energon!"
That made Lana back away quickly. Slag... Energon…humans didn't use those words. The closet door hissed and slowly slid open. Lana didn't wait for it to do so. She ran through her enclosure to her "pantry" where she knew there were plenty of boxes to hide behind or under. When she made it there she glanced over her shoulder. A smallish, human-sized, robot silhouette darkened the closet entry, a red visor darting around.
More robots—little ones?
"Smooth one Lana. Why don't you just plaster a flashing sign over your cage?"
Lana didn't care how small they were, she didn't want them to see her. Quickly she flipped over a large box and slipped underneath. The box had a small handle cutout so she peeked through it.
The lights suddenly brightened in the closet and at the far end she could just barely see the intruder. He was purple and silver and about human-sized but that was all she could make out.
The purple and silver mech appeared to be staring at her sleeping quarter, "What in the Pit…HEY! Frenzy! Check this out!"
In a few moments a similarly designed mech of red and black appeared, "Did ya find some high grade?"
"No, but look at this." the purple one pointed.
"What is it?"
"They're solid Energon cubes." the purple and silver one known as Rumble tapped the outer wall of her 'bedroom' thoughtfully, "I thought we only used the energy-barrier cubes these days."
The red and black one called Frenzy laughed, "Yeah… they're probably just TC's old Energon glasses. What a closet overloader!"
Both of the small bots laughed. Rumble began to walk the length of the enclosure, coming closer.
He seemed to frown with confusion as he stared inside each "room", "What IS all that junk?"
"Looks like human stuff." Frenzy mentioned, pointing to a stack of towels near her pool.
"Human stuff?" the purple and silver mech stared at his twin, "Why would TC keep human stuff in his closet?"
"Closet fleshy lover?" Frenzy snorted at his own pun.
Rumble seemed to roll the light in his visor in a very human expression of annoyance, "Seriously though, why keep this junk? It's not even interesting. Now that taser we swiped off that police human…"
The red and black bot hit his brother's shoulder with remembrance, "YEAH! I loved that thing."
"Remember we rigged it to shock every few seconds and then we stuck it to Blitzwing's back when he wasn't looking?" Rumble sniggered.
Frenzy nodded, "Oh yeah. He jumped every few seconds and got all fritzed wondering who was shocking him. That was so funny!"
Again the two mech's laughed and kept coming closer until at last they arrived at her pantry compartment. Lana could clearly see them now. Both were small but probably still pushing seven to eight feet in height, which made them just about the same height as her enclosure. They were of identical construction with only their color defining their difference. Their New York "street punk" voices even sounded alike. Thundercracker had the same odd accent. Lana vaguely remembered hearing those voices the day she was nearly killed by Skywarp's prank, but she never realized there were "human-sized" robots as well.
"Hey! Look at all that human fuel." Frenzy pointed.
Rumble suddenly smirked, "Where there's human fuel, there's got to be humans."
Head bobbing, Frenzy appeared to be looking for her, "I don't see any."
The purple and silver Con looked up and noticed the lip of the enclosure lid. He gave a pleased smile and suddenly his arms folded over upon themselves until a bulky pair of large hammer-like pistons erected from his arms.
Lana gaped openly at the transformation. To date she'd never seen any of the Cons do such a remarkable thing, not even Thundercracker. She knew her master had jet parts but she'd never actually witnessed a transformation.
Rumble suddenly jumped up, swung his pile-drivers, and rammed the edge of the lid sending it flying off and onto the floor. Lana cringed when he effortlessly landed on the rim of the now open compartment, reforming his pile-drivers into arms.
"Well let's have a look-see." he stated, jumping down into the 'pantry' and smashing several boxes of food.
Frenzy leaped up and in as well, smashing more of her food stores, "You really think TC's got a human?"
"Why would he keep all this human fuel if he didn't have one, numb nodes?" Rumble insulted his twin.
The red and black mech shoved his partner's shoulder, "Hey! Who you callin' numb nodes?"
"YOU! Numb nodes!" Rumble hit him back.
In an instant the miniature mechs lockedarms and began shoving each other around the pantry, leaving a wake of crushed destruction.
"That's my food you assholes!" Lana hissed to herself.
Frenzy suddenly snatched a loose box of cereal and smashed it over Rumble's head. Cheerios went everywhere.
"ARG! It's in my joints!" Rumble yelled, flicking his arms to rid himself of the oat rings.
Crunching loudly on the spilled cereal, the two Cons tackled each other, hitting the wall again. Frenzy snagged a flat of sports drinks, and swung it bashing his brother in the head with an explosion of red liquid.
The purple and silver drone screamed, throwing his hands to his optics, "AAAA! IT'S EATING MY ARMOR! IT BURNS! IT BURNS!"
Frenzy stopped momentarily, "Huh?"
Seizing the opportunity Rumble punched his brother in the face, sending him flying back into a flat of flour bags. Flour exploded in the air, blanketing everything in a dusty white haze. Frenzy was now muted gray and faded red. He made a sputtering noise, expelling flour from what looked like air vents on the sides of his face and across his chest. Rumble bent over laughing at his twin's "ghostly" appearance. Frenzy snarled and charged his brother again.
The pair tussled until they shoved each other into the vicinity of Lana's box. Without much warning, Rumble seized up the box and slammed it down on Frenzy's head, not even realizing he'd found the human they'd been looking for all along. Lana froze, completely exposed.
Violently throwing bits of the broken cardboard box off of him Frenzy noticed her. "Hey! There it is!"
"Oh no! You're not going to get me with that!" Rumble growled, balling his fists for another attack.
Frenzy pointed, "NO! Seriously, bro! Look!"
Rumble turned his head minutely, still wary of a fake-out by his twin. But when he saw Lana he forgot all about their altercation.
"HEY! I was right! There was a squishy in here." he crowed proudly.
Lana dropped her head, "Oh shit."
Both of the miniature Cons stood on either side of her, staring down at her.
"Do you think it's male or female?" Frenzy asked.
Before Lana could grow indignant, Rumble hissed, "Don't be stupid Frenzy."
He forcefully grabbed Lana by the arm to make her stand. Then he audaciously squeezed her left breast. Lana's jaw dropped.
"See, their femmes got these lumps of fat on their chassis." he explained. "And…" he reached for her crotch.
Lana viciously slapped his hand away, "HANDS OFF!"
Rumble's visor flashed and Frenzy just laughed, "Yeah that's a femme all right. All femmes hit you, Rumble!"
"Which is more than can be said about you—femmes won't even TOUCH you." Rumble retorted.
Wrenching her arm and kicking, Lana tried to free herself from Rumble's iron grip.
"Aww, look. It's trying to get away." the purple and silver mech laughed mockingly, picking her up underneath her armpits and holding her in front of him, "What's the matter fleshy? Don'tcha wanna play?"
Lana clenched her teeth and finally held still. Fighting robots was always a wasted effort.
"Bite me." she snapped.
The two brothers shared a confused look.
"She wants you to bite her." Frenzy hissed under his vocalizer, "Isn't that a human mating ritual?"
Rumble suddenly pitched the girl toward his brother who caught her, "ARG! No way!"
Frenzy laughed dangling Lana out in front of him and moved toward his brother. His voice rose to a higher falsetto, "Ooo, Rumble! I've got metal fever! Ooo! Make me a REAL femme, Rumble!"
Disgusted, Rumble backed away, "Shut up scrap head! That's just gross!"
Utterly humiliated, Lana dropped her head and then growled, "Are you DONE?"
The two stopped momentarily.
"HONESTLY! Don't you machines have anything BETTER to do?" her voice rose with frustration.
They paused until Rumble said, "The fleshy is right."
Frenzy nodded, "Yeah. Let's hit the wash station, then we'll play with her."
The flour-covered mech abruptly slung Lana over his boxy shoulder in a fireman's carry.
"No! Put me down you insane tin can!" Lana shouted, struggling to get down.
Frenzy harshly squeezed her arm, "Keep quiet fleshy. You're comin' with us."
"Yeah, we've got all kinds of pranks we can use you for." Rumble agreed.
Panic suddenly seized Lana's lungs, "No! NO! NO! PUT ME DOWN! LEAVE ME ALONE!"
The two mechs easily jumped out of the enclosure and exited the "closet door". Then they made the impossible leap to the floor from the counter. Lana grunted from the impact and began kicking and bucking, but Frenzy wouldn't let go.
"Stop squirming!" he growled as they marched for the big door.
"I said, PUT ME DOWN!" Lana screamed.
Somehow her knee jerked up and struck Frenzy in the side of the head, disrupting his equilibrium sensors for the briefest instant. The small red and black mech jerked spasmodically, dropping Lana next to him. He stumbled briefly but righted his sensors with a quick shake of his head.
"So! You wanna play ROUGH huh?" Frenzy inquired, reforming his arms into a heavy set of pile drivers.
Lana pushed herself with her hands, trying to gain enough momentum to stand and run from the two mini menaces when suddenly a gust of air pressure rustled her clothes and hair. She flinched when two immense black feet settled on either side of her. Unforeseen relief flooded Lana's mind as she gazed way up at Thundercracker looming above her. She glanced at the two little Decepticons who had stopped their pursuit of her and were focused on the much larger mech. Unabashedly, Lana got up and ran behind the huge thruster that made up her master's heel for protection.
However, the towering blue jet Con didn't even see her as he was focused on the two intruders. Rumble and Frenzy froze, uneasy smiles forming on their faces.
"Heeey T.C! We thought you were in the med bay getting repair work." Rumble greeted awkwardly.
"WHAT are you two doing in my quarters?" Thundercracker boomed, earning his namesake.
The two brothers raised their shoulders indignantly, "What are YOU doing with a human Thundercracker?"
"Yeah!" Frenzy chimed in changing his pile drives back into arms.
Thundercracker balled his fists stealing a glance at the opened closet door where he kept his pet. They'd found her. Great…Rumble and Frenzy were the biggest loud mouths on the ship. He was fragged to Cybertron and back unless he outmaneuvered them.
"That's none of your fraggin' business you glitches! You're trespassing in my personal quarters!"
"YOU'RE hiding contraband!" Frenzy accused.
"What Ikeep in my quarters is MY business." the jet Con rasped.
Rumble crossed his arms grinning cockily, "I'll bet Megatron would make it his business."
There was a heavy pause until Thundercracker grated, "Fine. I'm keeping a human. So what?"
"So we want to play with it." the brothers demanded.
"Forget it! You two would kill her." Thundercracker had a sickening feeling that they already had.
Rumble and Frenzy shared a smug look, "I'll bet if Megatron found out he'd kill her quicker than we would."
Finding himself trapped the blue Seeker tried to think and suddenly unloaded his ultimate ammunition: blackmail.
"Yeah? You two go ahead and tell and I'll show Megatron who REALLY stole his stash of Iaconian High Grade."
The drone brothers glanced at each other uneasily and Rumble lied, "We don't know nothin' about that."
Thundercracker nodded matter-of-factly, "AND I'll tell him WHO was responsible for fraggin' that fuel raid last week."
"Why would Megatron believe you?" Rumble shouted, clearly perturbed.
Thundercracker smiled darkly, "I just happened to be in the right place at the right time to record the WHOLE thing."
"You're bluffin! You've got nothin' on us!" Rumble insisted.
"Oh no?" Thundercracker raised a brow plate.
He brought up a holographic image of the two drones carrying off several cubes of Energon and then another image of them fighting. The fight soon resulted in a massive landslide which fell on Megatron just as he was delivering a threat to Optimus Prime. Rumble and Frenzy cursed quietly.
Thundercracker ceased the images and added, "Oh…and didn't you guys let Starscream take the blame for both of those incidents? I'll bet he'd LOVE to watch this little file."
The Cassetticons clenched their metal jaws, "This is blackmail!"
"You bet it is you little fraggers. So keep your traps shut and this file will stay locked in my mainframe. Talk to ANYONE and this file goes straight to Megatron."
Rumble and Frenzy snarled resentfully, "You son of a glitch"
Thundercracker pointed forcefully, "Now get out!"
Pissed off but pacified, the drones marched out and the door hissed shut. Thundercracker darkened his crimson optics a moment and then slowly moved toward the opened closet, opening the door all the way.
…
When Thundercracker's foot moved away, Lana suddenly realized he hadn't seen her at all.
"Why didn't you run out the door while he was distracted?" her mind screamed angrily. "Because those two little monsters would have seen you and "played" with you," her logical side interjected.
Instinct prompted Lana to move as close to the wall as she could to avoid getting stepped on. She watched as Thundercracker pulled out her entire enclosure and began scanning the compartments.
"Lana?" he called tapping the walls, "Lana?"
But, she wasn't there. Worry shifted the metal plates of his face when he noted the trashed state of her "fuel" room. Disconnecting it from the other sections he lifted it up and stared into it from every angle. He took in a sudden gust of air when he saw thick red smears and droplets coating the cage floor. Not realizing it was only red sports drink mixing with the spilt flour, he grimly set the cube on the counter. Lana jumped when he angrily slammed his fist into the wall, denting it. His deep low growl slowly faded as he sat heavily in his work chair, head down, one arm resting over the edges of his knee, and the other hand rested on his forehead.
At first, Lana wasn't sure what to make of his reaction until realization made the back of her throat tighten. The giant mech seemed to think she was dead and he actually looked upset about it. It was the oddest sight to Lana. She cautiously took a step away from the wall and began to walk up to him.
"What the HELL do you think you're doing?" her mind hissed incredulously, "He thinks you're dead! Why don't you hide and make your escape?"
Lana didn't know how to answer her mind, honestly. It didn't make a lot of sense to her either. Perhaps her conscience, which typically didn't get a lot of attention, was pushing her. She honestly…dare she think it…felt bad for him. Her mind still protested though her body marched onward. After a couple minutes she was right in front of him staring up at him.
"Thundercracker?" she said quietly.
His head immediately perked up and his red optics locked on her tiny form.
In mere seconds his hand snatched her up, "Lana!"
His optics passed over her as he inspected his pet for wounds. When he found none, he stared at the "pantry" section of her enclosure and gave it a thorough scan. It wasn't her bio-fluid after all…he just overreacted.
The big jet Con smiled with relief which eased Lana.
That is, until he flashed his eyes with anger, "Why didn't you come when I called you?"
Fear welled up in Lana's chest, "I…I…"
His grip tightened ever so slightly, "You're supposed to come when I call you!"
"I'm sorry! I'm sorry." Lana pleaded.
He slammed his other fist into the metal counter top, "Don't you EVER worry me like that!"
"WH—What?"
The Con paused as if he'd not intended to say that. His anger slowly dissipated as did his grip and he gently began to stroke her back.
"My poor little Lana. Your little chest-pump his beating 153 bpm," he stated soothingly, continuing to pet her. "Did those fraggers hurt you?"
Lana shook her head, inwardly relieved he wasn't mad after all, just concerned.
He tipped his head and opened his hand so she was merely sitting in his palm, "Did you miss your Master?"
The redhead narrowed her eyes at his demeaning speech but admitted, "I…I DID wonder if you were coming back"
A smile formed on his alien face, "Aww. Now ain't that sweet? My little pet missed me."
Lana rolled her eyes back. Then she noticed several burn marks and rips in Thundercracker's metal skin.
"What happened to you?" she pointed at a particularly nasty hole near his cockpit chest.
He smirked, "Oh, just some battle wounds. They'll repair themselves in a few days."
Lana scrunched her forehead, "You can repair yourself automatically?"
"Sure. How else would I stay in tip-top condition?" he tapped his chest.
She shrugged, "Go to the robot repair shop?"
A low deep rumble that sounded somewhat like a laugh followed her statement, "That's only for really bad damage. I didn't get hurt too bad this time."
"Who were you fighting?" the redhead inquired, wondering if humans had actually been able to inflict damages like that on Thundercracker.
He smiled patiently and patted her head, "So many questions."
After a few minutes of silence Lana knew he had no intention of answering her query so she asked another that was bothering her, "What did they mean by 'contraband'?"
"Oh, don't let those two worry you. I've got enough blackmail to keep them quiet for centuries." he said in a placating manner.
"You're not supposed to HAVE me are you?" Lana accused.
"I SAID…" his voice rose but fell, "don't let it worry you."
Though she didn't want to drop it, Lana did to avoid angering him again. It was a surreal moment, robot master relaxing in his chair stroking his human pet in silence—both wondering in secret just how long this would last.