For: Patty the Purple Platypus, who has the most amazing penname ever! =D Thanks for the request, dear!
Day 25 – The Last
On Christmas Day…
It's first year, and she's all alone. She looks around the Gryffindor Common Room, a strange sadness in her eyes. She's all alone, and so lonely. She wants to be home!
And then Christmas break comes, and she has friends, and it hurts to leave the castle that she has come to regard as her home.
-----
It's second year, and she's always with her friends, playing Quidditch and laughing and talking and flirting. She and the Weasley twins have forged a bond, and she's proud of being friends with boys.
Christmas break arrives, and she hugs them both good-bye, and no awkwardness interrupts the embrace.
-----
It's third year, and she's proud of being on the Quidditch team, of making it to teenage years, of being labeled "the popular Gryffindor girl". She's proud of being a brave lion, of representing that. She's proud of her label, and her friends, and her life.
When Christmas break comes, she cries to say good-bye, because this year is especially good.
-----
It's fourth year, and she thinks that maybe he likes her, maybe that smile holds more than mischief, maybe all the teasing might amount to something. But maybe not.
And over Christmas break, she dreams of going out with him, of being his girl, of loving him.
-----
It's fifth year, and a mass murderer is on the run, and she should be scared. But she has a boyfriend now, on-and-off, a boy to protect her and kiss away her fears.
She sends a million owls to the Weasley house over Christmas break, and her mother looks and her knowingly, and her brother complains, and she is strangely buoyant.
-----
It's sixth year, and they go to the Yule Ball together, "as friends but maybe more", as he told her when she was asked. She asks him if they're an item or not, and all he says is "I don't know."
At least he's a magnificent dancer.
Christmas comes and goes, chock-full of giggling visits to Alicia's place and longing owls to his house. Her mother takes her aside and teaches her things, tells her things, makes her confess to this strange feeling she's having.
-----
It's seventh year, and he leaves her, kisses her forehead and goes, and she's lost in a flood of tears. Owling isn't enough, seeing him on Hogsmeade weekends isn't enough. She's Quidditch captain, she should be better at this – but she can't be, she can only be stern and tough and secretly pine for him the whole time.
All she remembers about Christmas that year is the blur of fake smiles and presents, and the tag in her memory – "Before he left."
-----
It's the end of Hogwarts, the end of her childhood, and she'd just like to burn the bridges and get over it. She's done with being a kid. She's ready to grow up. So she moves in with the two of them, something George clearly doesn't appreciate. She moves in and plops down on their couch and tells him what's what. "I'm living here because you told me I could," she tells him. "I want us to work, and I want us to work right now."
The problem with having a Weasley Twin as a boyfriend, however, is the fact of freedom. They'd rather be doing what they want to do, not having any obligations.
Christmas is spent at home this year, like always, and she feels like she's forsaken her relationship for it, telling him that she needs to do this. She visits him the day after, and they have their own Christmas. Still, it's strange to go home and act normal, knowing he's home, being a Weasley.
-----
And, abruptly, the war is upon them. They aren't laughing as often, drinking as often, proving their love for each other as often. She doesn't focus on making them work anymore, and he doesn't focus on wanting to break free. They try to be normal, but nothing is.
And Christmas that year is a horrid affair. She goes home and celebrates, but the war is the only topic of conversation. He tells her that Ron is gone, that it makes everything strange, that Ginny won't go back to school after this. He tells that Percy is still not coming home. He tells of Fleur and Bill's new house, of the beauty of it, of their frequent fights about Fleur going back to France and staying safe. He has story upon story, but none comfort her, and too many tears are shed that year that no amount of jokes can make up for it.
And then comes the final battle, and Voldemort is upon them and all she can think of is God, he has to live, he has to live, he can't die. She feels horrible about it, for not caring about Harry and for not focusing on her own precious life. But it is nothing in the face of her love for him, because as hard as it has been loving him, she does, she has, she always will.
"I love you," he tells her, kissing her deeply and then giving her a bone-crushing hug. "I will always love you." And then he's gone, disappearing into the throng of fighters and spells being flung.
She throws herself into maiming, hurting, killing people, and she tells herself it's all for the greater good, that in the end she can make up for the lives she's taken by saving those lives of people who have good intentions, who are good and kind and for the Light, for Dumbledore's Army.
And then, when it's all over, when she is exhausted and numb, she goes into the Great Hall and tries to celebrate, but it's there that she sees him, his body white and his eyes closed. His mouth is set in a smile, but it is a real one, one she is used to. She screams in grief, in surprise, and throws herself at him. "No, no, no, Fred, no, you're alive! You have to be, my love, my darling, my amazing Fred! I didn't get to tell you half the things I felt, half the things I needed to tell you!" And she's collapsed and crying, and she kisses him. His lips are ice cold, and when she touches his face it's just as bad. She feels his legs, and they are strangely warm beneath his clothes. She sobs harder, horrified, terrified, ruined.
She thinks she can never, ever cry again, because she has cried too much, but the wake and the funeral prove otherwise, her eyes bloated from tears and her nose a permanent red. She doesn't care how she looks or acts, wearing orange and purple together and crying in the middle of a shopping center or a Muggle street corner.
She cannot celebrate anything that year. Christmas passes meaninglessly. Time slows, and then quickens, and then slows again. Nothing is right. April first arrives, and she goes to the Weasleys, sobbing. They all cry together, Bill and Fleur and Charlie and George and Ron and Hermione and Ginny and Harry and Molly and Arthur, a neverending stream of tears, salt and water with a terrifying consistency. Nothing seems to change.
But then slowly, she begins to heal. She wears matching clothes again. She doesn't break down crying so often. She visits the Weasleys at least twice a week, and she comforts and consoles them instead of the other way around. She gets out more often, goes to reunions and parties and starts to play Quidditch again. She makes a team, the Hollyhead Harpies, and is proud of it. She watches and helps as Hogwarts rebuilds itself, as the Wizarding world recovers from Voldemort. She observes Ron and Hermione's relationship, Harry and Ginny's, Arthur and Molly's, Bill and Fleur's, Alicia and George's. She doesn't go looking for one herself.
And slowly, ever so slowly, she repairs her life. Beyond her outward appearance, her job, her friends. She remembers the day of the week again. She begins to meet Lee Jordan for coffee at a Muggle shop once a week.
Though she will never be well, and never stop loving her dear, dead boyfriend, she can move on. She can live the life he surely wanted for her. She is healthy.
(Angelina/Fred)
Notes: Whoa, massive!update! Hahaha, yay, that was so fun to write, a balance between fluff and angst.
Merry Belated Christmas, readers & especially reviewers. To my regulars: You always made me laugh, or at the very least smile. I've made so many new friends out of you guys, and it's a joy. I hope you'll all keep reviewing & PMing me, and I'll def. try to do the same! This means Bendleshnitz, Just Loopy xx, Morning. xx, Hondagirl, HermioneWeasleyFan, Silverbirch, Serindraxx, Crina, Miss Bliss03, Tonkswyrda, FallenAngel111586, Amaherst, Ammiel, Kitty Bridgeta, A Catholic Girl, Celebrytie Aris Channas, Bad Mum, Honeybun911, glowyrm, Beefcake the Mighty, and Kandib293. (If I've forgotten anyone who reviewed regularly, I'm so sorry, and you have full permission to kill me. :D )
To my one- or few-time reviewers: I loved your reviews, no matter how little of them there were! Every one was so amazing! Msllamalover, Patty the Purple Platypus, Naflower05, Lunar Sphinx, Onikakushi, colouringcrayons, dollyxdoll'-'x, LadyVi, LilysMommy, Dominiquevip, vlmck02, and Weasley is my anti-drug 00 – you all rock! (Again, if I've forgotten anyone, you so can kill me!)
To my readers-but-not-reviewers: Aww, I'm sad that you never left anything! I can't name you guys, but you all are lovely for giving this fic a chance or perhaps reading it religiously!! Much love to all of you!
And to everyone: You have no idea how much fun it was writing this fic! It gave me a reason to procrastinate and, through the hard & fun times, it helped me clear my head. You all let me write funeral bits till I was satisfied; you let me ramble on in these notes; you gave me a reason to smile; you were constantly encouraging & fun; you were supportive when I needed it, helpful when I needed it, funny when I needed it, and philosophical when I needed it :D; and you all are so very amazing! Even when I dumped on you the fact that my grandpa had died, you accepted it with grace and were amazing about it!
Okay, I'll stop now, really. But you have no idea the gratitude I feel towards you all! So many hugs to everyone!! *hugs the whole world*