Dream of Mirror 2 Corners of Reality Chapter 6: If you mean it, I'll believe it, a death note fanfic

Chapter 06 – If you mean it, I'll believe it

The first thing that went through Mello's head as the White One walked through his bedroom door was that the kid had a funky marking on his forehead.

The second was that he never wanted to let Near go again.

Its my win, Near. Those were the last words Near had heard. Yagami had prepared a speech, had laughed it out, by Near had already been dead. It was a quick death. The other SPK members and the Japanese police had all died slowly but for Near it had been quick, a simple matter of his heart giving out and then stopping.

Mello hadn't known if he had liked it better this way or not.

Mello is dead, Near had said matter-of-factly four years later, standing before him in this strange new place in the middle of a crowded street. He'd sounded just about as shocked as Mello had felt. I'm not dead, you're dead, Mello had responded. And Near, in all of his glory, had proved to be the same person that Mello could have sworn had died by saying, I'm obviously not dead, Then Mello had proved that he had stayed just as much the same by saying, I'm obviously not either.

Their journey had begun.

He hates me, I don't hate him, Near was so convincing with his words that Mello would have believed him if he hadn't already known the truth. Near had told him he didn't hate him but at the time Mello had always assumed it was because Near didn't give enough of a shit to waste an emotion like hate on him.

I'm not good enough for you to hate? Mello had asked, but he had been ignored.

I'll help you pansies fight your war, Mello had agreed because he wanted nothing more then to go back home and pretend like this had never happened, even if it meant he had to work alongside Near. Four years ago he would have told himself that he was insane and that he should just find another way home – four years later his curious side smacked him across the head and told him to take a second whiff of that awful smell because he wanted to know exactly what it was.

Genuis. Near had said after shooting the first creature in the head had gone horribly wrong.

Shut the fuck up. Mello had replied, at the time much too angry to realize that Near had cracked a joke.

I don't know how to do any of that yet, I haven't learned it! Near had yelled after Mello had demanded he cast magic at the charging creature.

You're useless! Mello had accused.

Mello is the one who shot at it! Near accused in return.

And, had the creature not chosen that time to rear back and attack, Mello might have realized that Near was fighting back for the first time.

I'm smart, Near had admitted with no amount of modesty. But I am not wonderful and I am most definitely not perfect.

That was when Mello realized that Near had grown up.

There's only one bed, Mello had pointed out as if Near was blind and could not see for himself.

It's big enough for two, Near had responded as if the bed was the size of the entire room.

I'm not sharing a bed for you, Mello had growled as if doing so would be worse then Chinese water torture.

Then sleep on the floor, Near had hummed as if there was an extra bed on the floor with a sign that read, 'Sleep on me!'

I'm not sleeping on the floor, either! Mello had protested as if sleeping on the floor would give him some incurable disease.

Then sleep outside? Near had offered as if Mello would be more keen to the idea of sleeping out in the cold then sleeping on the floor, which might give him some incurable disease.

Why don't you sleep on the floor or outside and I sleep on the bed? Mello had asked as if Near was being completely unreasonable.

Because Mello is the one who has issues with sharing a bed, Near had said as if it was the simplest thing in the world.

Take your robes off, Mello had ordered so suddenly that Near had done a double take.

What? Near had asked rather stupidly.

Mello had rolled his eyes and pointed out, If you sit around in soaked clothes you're going to get sick. Take them off and let them dry.

Oh, right, Near had replied and as he'd slipped his clothes off all Mello could think was that Near looked kind of cute when he was stupid.

But he still hated him.

Thank you, Mello, Near had said and Mello had fallen silent.

Because he knew it wasn't a dream, then. Because in all of the dreams he had about beating Near, never once did Near ever say thank you, especially for something so simple.

Mello is right, Near had said after a short argument.

After Mello questioned him he had just said, I have my reasons.

And, while Mello shouldn't have cared, he demanded, You can't just go and say something like that then tell me 'I have my reasons'! I want to know!

I'll tell Mello later, Near had responded with no intention of ever telling him.

And Mello had just said I hate you! You're impossible! Because he didn't want to admit that there was something about Near that he cared enough to want to know.

It tastes like chocolate, Mello had said, more surprised that Near had bothered to think of him then by the fact that this weird thing tasted just like the thing he was addicted to.

I tried it earlier and thought of Mello, Near had explained.

Mello didn't have it in him to say that when he'd spotted a store with toys in it as they'd walked into town, he'd thought of Near too.

When he'd wrapped the necklace around Near's neck, he didn't know what he was doing. So he offered up a lame excuse. Something about it looking good with Near's outfit or protecting him, the first thing that came to his mind, really.

What he really wanted to say was that he was confused and his mind was clouded.

He hated himself for wanting to admit weakness to Near. And he hated Near for making him feel weak.

But maybe, just maybe, he didn't hate Near as much as he thought he did.

You're impossible, Mello had said.

Mello has told me, Near had replied.

And an asshole, Mello had continued.

That as well, Near hadn't missed a heartbeat.

Plus, really annoying, Mello had begun to plan.

And that, Near had deadpanned.

And kind of cute when you're asleep.

Near had sputtered in surprise and Mello had wondered why he was so off.

He also wondered if he was being honest about the cute thing or not.

(Our daughter, Piper, will be four next June, Near had said. Mello couldn't help but think of the irony, now, as he realized that Piper would have indeed been four around that time and that her birthday was probably in June.

Or maybe it wasn't irony)

Glace had reminded him of Near only because of the obsession with toys and it was then that Mello had realized that he was looking for reasons to be reminded of Near.

But he still hated him.

Right?

As Mello fell into the river he was surprised to find himself wondering if Near would miss him.

Then he was mad because his last thoughts were of Near.

Mail had been right when he'd said they had met before, because it was Mail who pulled him out of the river and onto a horse, then over to thief town.

God only knew why Mail knew where thief town was, but Mello supposed he shouldn't question small favors.

He didn't know why he didn't mention having seen Matt to Near.

He also didn't know why his first thought when waking up had been if Near was alright.

But he still hated him.

Near? Mello had whispered in shock as Near had thrown his arms around him, appearing suddenly in a small tavern in thief town, like the bright light that was suddenly switched on at the end of a very long tunnel.

I thought you were gone, Near had said with such emotion that all Mello could do was say that they should talk in his room.

They didn't get much talking done, though. Just a few words before they were suddenly sprawled in the bed with no clothes on.

But he still hated-

Oh, fuck it.

You were a virgin, weren't you, Mello had said and then instantly regretted it. Near's silence had been an answer on its own.

I was dying, Near had explained after Mello had asked again.

Mello hadn't expected that and had been caught off guard. Dying? He'd sputtered.

Dying, Near had repeated.

And after Near had explained that he was dying of a brain tumor, that he had been told he was going to die just before he'd come here, all Mello could stupidly say was, You were dying?

Near… what happened last night… it was-

Just sex, no romantic attachments, and not going to happen again.

And as Near walked out all Mello could do was realize that he hated himself.

I can't do this without you, you know.

As he slipped in and out of it he felt a sense of peace because Near was there.

That might have bothered him at some point, but what really bothered him was the fact that it didn't bother him at all.

Did you just-

-Talk to me in my mind?

Things were getting more fucked up then Mello would have ever imagined.

But you love him anyway.

Mello had to tell himself that it was the sudden way Kenny had said the words that made him pause in shock. That it wasn't the fact that he was questioning if the mirror king was, in fact, telling the truth.

I don't love him, Mello had replied, speaking so firmly that he didn't believe a word he was saying.

Kenny had smiled. I know.

Then why? Mello had asked.

He wasn't ready for the answer, but he got it anyway. You don't love him now.

The hidden words hung in the air.

'But that doesn't mean you wont, someday.'

It was the fact that Mello knew Kenny was right that made it so much worse.

(If I was a cat, Matt had said so randomly one day that Mello couldn't help but laugh at the memory. I would spend all of my time licking my own balls.

If you were a cat, Mello had responded without a hitch. You would be fixed.)

Considering he is your companion and soul m- LiSen had begun and Mello had cut him off with,

Don't say those words for the love of god.

Because he didn't want to hear it.

Because he wanted to hear it more then anything else.

What if I want to stab Near? Mello had asked LiSen, holding up the magical daggers in question.

Why would you want to? LiSen had asked, staring at him as if he were insane.

Because I hate him, Mello had responded.

He pretended as if he didn't have to force the words out.

He also pretended not to care as Near got up and left.

Next thing you know if I die I'm going to hear a voice ask me if I want to continue or not, Mello had said sarcastically.

Maybe if you say no you can go home, Near had joked.

And Mello had answered, I don't want to go home yet without thinking.

If this is a dream then I don't want to wake up.

What scared Mello the most was that he didn't want to, either.

I didn't think Mello cared, Near had said after a few more Mirror kings, one more night of extremely good sex, and a frustrating fight.

And Mello, angry and in denial, had quickly gone to snap, 'Well I don't', only to find himself stopping halfway through the words.

You what? Near asked after a few moments of silence.

I don't know, Mello finally admitted.

Then Near dared to ask, How does Mello feel about me?

And Mello admitted, again, I don't know.

They're after me, Near had said and all Mello could think was, 'I can't let them get you because I can't be without you.'

If they catch you, they will torture you, Mello had told him.

If it means Mello can get away safely I'm willing to take the chance, Near had replied.

The only thing Mello could do was hit him.

As Holand grabbed hold of Near and dragged him off, Mello felt his heart break.

I love you too, Mello finally admitted.

The next thing he knew, Near was kissing him. Not in a memory, but in real life- here, standing in front of Matt, two years later.

"I'm sorry," Near said once the need for air was bad enough that they had to break away.

And before Mello could tell Matt to leave the redhead was already gone.

"So let me get this straight," Mello hummed, drumming his painted fingernails against his lips in thought. "Next isn't from this reality and the double you had is the actual Near from this time?"

"He goes by Nate," Near informed.

"And you're currently seeing L standing around giving you advice that you, quote, 'Already know and are too stubborn to follow'?"

"I told him that all advice was that way."

"And these past two years you've been living with Yagami?"

"Amongst other people."

"And all this time we could have been screwing like rabbits but weren't because you were too stubborn and afraid of facing reality?"

Near frowned. "Mello doesn't have to put it so harsh."

Mello shook his head. "I wouldn't be me if I didn't." He moved away from the window and flopped down on the bed, next to Near. "Wait- so if Next isn't from this reality, he isn't really Mihael's soul mate, is he?"

"Technically he is," Near informed. "Well, if Mello wants to get extremely technical- so am I, and so is Nate. Which means you are also Nate's soul mate, as well as Next's."

"Woah," Mello breathed. (In the back of his head he could hear Matt saying, 'Soul mate orgy!')

"Well, I guess it doesn't matter so long as they love each other," Mello hummed. "Or some shit like that."

"I don't think Nate would fall in love with Mihael," Near mused. "He's already got Linda."

"Oh shit!" Mello yelped, sitting up and staring at Near. "I forgot- you have a kid! Wait, you already knew?"

"Piper exists in this world, as well," Near informed, pulling Mello back down beside him.

"Great, I just can't get rid of the little brat," Mello groaned. He then realized what Near had said and gave the boy a weird look. "Nate is with Linda?"

"Actually, no," Near hummed. "Linda died a while ago."

"Oh." After a few moments of silence, Mello said, "Its weird talking about these people like they're not actually us."

"It is," Near agreed.

Sighing, Mello moved to get up, pulling himself out of Near's arms. "As much as I'd love to lay here for you for the rest of the week, Next is kind of in need of our help."

Near moved to sit up, looking almost cocky. "Then Mello can stay as long as he wants because Next is fine."

Mello stared at him. "What are you talking about? You told me he got kidnapped by the same guys who attacked us!"

"I was trying to get you to turn back," Near said, honestly.

Mello groaned and threw his arms up. "I'm going to kill you!"

Near smiled. "I can't die."

Mello flopped down onto the bed, Next to Near. "Well, I'd better let the Matts know, then… well, okay, it can wait." He curled up around the pillow, not moving when Near laid down close to him.

After a few moments of silence, Mello asked, "Near?"

"Hm?" Near hummed.

Mello's face was serious. "I'm not going home this time."

Near smiled again. "I wouldn't let Mello, anyway."

Author notes: Hey guys... sorry to disappoint but for now this is going to be the end of this story. I'm going through a bit of a writers block right now and no matter how hard I try, I just can't figure out where this story should go.

Sorry.