Chapter Five

The Doctor looked around him while he slowly made his way through the cave. He hadn't seen any spiders yet but he had his tissue compressor screwdriver at the ready while he used his flashlight to look at every nook and cranny. His keen senses were attuned to every little movement this time and he kept an extra close eye on the ceiling. He entered the cavern with the stream, paused and looked at the ceiling. He slowly moved the light across it and breathed a sigh of relief when he didn't see anything except stalactites. He put his screwdriver in his pocket, switched his flashlight to his other hand and put his free hand in the tote bag ready to lob a bomb at a moment's notice.

He went past the cavern into a narrow passageway, his eyes darting around looking for any sign of trouble. He had temporarily blocked his family's minds from him so they wouldn't be tempted to contact him. He didn't know if the spiders could pick up on telepathic conversations if they weren't directed at them but he wasn't taking any chances. He hated that familiar feeling of emptiness but he forced himself to ignore it while he pressed on.

He stopped short and quickly turned off his flashlight when he noticed movement up ahead. He could sense spiders coming into the room, could pick up snatches of telepathic conversation and he quickly blocked his mind from them so they wouldn't detect him. He crouched down and listened to the snatches of conversation while he reached out with his senses to try to determine how many spiders were in front of him. He hadn't heard anything that made him think that the queen was among them but he was confident he would get her eventually.

He slowly reached into his bag and pulled out a bomb. He put his finger on the trigger button and readied himself to throw it. He paused with his arm behind him and then he pressed the button, threw it as hard as he could and sprinted back through the opening running away from it as fast as he could. He saw the crystals light up when the bomb went off and heard the screaming of dozens of spiders in his mind while he stopped and looked back. He grinned when he saw them shrinking a moment before the bomb finally stopped and the cavern was plunged into darkness again.

"Yup, me and my brother are just brilliant!" he said while he turned his flashlight back on.

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Kida slowly opened the door and peeked inside her bedroom. Her eyes widened when she saw Alan lying on the bed in just his Y-fronts. His clothes were strewn all over the room and there was a lusty look in his eyes.

"Found that rope?" he said. "Good! Let's get down to business then! How would you like to be tied, stomach up or stomach down?"

Kida stood there and stared at him in shock.

"COME ON, TIED UP AND TIED DOWN?" Alan screamed, startling her. "I TOLD YA I CAN'T KEEP MY WOMB BROOM AT ATTENTION ALL DAY! SO WHAT'S IT GONNA BE?"

"Um, look, suddenly I'm not too sure about this," she said.

"Wadda ya mean, you're not too sure about this? I thought you wanted this body! Now you're having second thoughts after I gave myself to you? Dear God, you women are fussy! My wife was the same way. I'd tie her up so she was on her stomach and she'd gripe that she'd want on her back. I'd put her on her back, she'd want on her stomach. I'd use the whip without the barbed wire; she'd want the barbed wire one. You lot just cannot make up your mind, can ya?"

Kida began to back away.

"Where ya goin' now?" he said, getting up. "I'm randy, woman! Can't ya see that? Now get over here and pleasure this hunky body o' mine!"

Kida turned and ran but Alan quickly caught up with her, snatched her from behind and picked her up off her feet.

"I am not in the mood for this! I need my sexual thrills and I need them now!" he said, taking the struggling princess into the room.

Kicking the door closed with his foot, he shoved her onto the bed. Kida quickly spun around onto her back and stared up at him with terrified eyes.

"No, please, I've changed my mind! Really, I'll let you go if you just leave me alone!" she said to him.

"Too late now, you killed my wife and daughter and I'm not about to live the rest of my lives without sexual pleasure."

"Then find someone else!"

"There is no one else," Alan snarled. "Because thanks to you, they're dead now!"

"I'm sorry, alright? I'm so sorry I killed your wife and daughter!"

"Oh I just bet you are! Just like you're sorry you killed every other innocent person who had the misfortune of crossing your path! You wanted me so badly, well, here I am! Unfortunately, you didn't realize that I'm a bit kinky when it comes to having sex. Well tough, if I'm gonna suffer for the rest of your life being your consort then you're gonna do it my way and I like it hard and rough, so drop your kit and let's have at it, NOW!"

She gasped and began to tremble when she saw his wild eyed look.

"No, I've changed my mind. You can go, just go!" she said.

"I can't go."

"Wh..why not?"

"Because I gotta stay here and make sure no one else suffers. I'm not about to see you feed other innocent people to those spiders of yours."

"I won't. I promise."

She flinched when Alan got in close and stared at her with his intense dark eyes.

"Why don't I believe you?" he growled.

"Please, I mean it. I won't feed any more people to the spiders, I swear!"

"Oh, I know you won't."

Kida stared at him.

"What do you mean?" she said.

He smirked.

"Because at this very moment the Doctor, my identical twin brother, is shrinking your little pets down to a harmless size and they'll stay that way forever more."

She blinked.

"Identical twin brother?" she said slowly.

He grinned.

"Alonzo Arthur Timelord," he said. "Pleased to meet you. Well, not really pleased per say, but you know, it's just a polite way of saying hello. But you can call me Alan, everyone else does."

"You're not the Doctor?"

"Nope," he said, popping the P.

The princess stared at him for a moment and then realization sank in. She hurried to the door but Alan was faster. She gasped when he flung himself against it and glared at her.

"You harmed my sister and niece, made my poor brother suffer needlessly and pulled me and the rest of his family away from a relaxing holiday and all because you wanted him for your own when he wasn't yours to take!" he snarled.

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah, well, I don't believe it! I don't believe you're sorry except you're sorry you got caught!" he growled. "You are nothing but a spoiled bratty little bitch who thought you could just have anything you wanted including my brother. Well, you know what, Missy? I may be his baby brother but I will defend him and my family to the death if need be and believe me, you don't want me as an enemy and if you don't believe that, ask the Daleks…well, you could ask them, I guess, if they were still alive because I blew them up and turned them into scrap!"

Kida was trembling now.

"What's wrong? I thought you were a big, bad all-powerful ruler? But you're not, are you? You're just a scared little girl who pretends to be an all-powerful ruler and bully everyone around you and if they don't toe the line, they become spider chow! Well, you made a mistake going after my brother, Princess, because they don't call him The Oncoming Storm for nothing and as for me…"

He neared closer to her.

"Like I said, ask the Daleks I turned into dust what they think of me."

"I'm…sorry, if I could bring back your family, I would."

He grinned.

"Oh, they're alive."

She blinked.

"What?"

She flinched when his face hardened again.

"Yes, my beloved sister and niece are alive, thankfully. And it's a good thing because I don't fancy seeing my brother and family spend the rest of their lives utterly devastated which is what would have happened if they really had died. My brother loves Rain and Jenny with every ounce of his being and so do I and if they did die, I promise you there would have been nowhere in all of creation you could have hidden from us! And right now, I have half a mind to drag you back to our TARDIS and take you to Volag Nok so they can put you away forever for murder and attempted murder."

He neared even closer to her and she trembled even more seeing the blackness of his eyes.

"Do you know what Volag Nok is?" he said in a low deadly tone of voice.

She swallowed hard and shook her head. He leaned his face into hers. She tried to look away but he grabbed her face and jerked her head back to his.

"It's a prison planet far away from here," he said as his piercing gaze bored into hers. "A prison that's built under a planet of ice and snow. So if you did happen to find your way outside, there would be nothing but icy wasteland in every direction and you'd freeze to death long before you found a way back here. That's where I would love to take you right now!"

"No, please have mercy!"

He snorted.

"Mercy? Did you show my sister and niece mercy when you allowed the spiders to take them away, webbed up and terrified? Did you show my brother mercy when he was in the throes of despair and thought he would never see the two people he loves most in the whole universe alive again? Did you care about any of them when your mind was on possessing my brother and making him yours? If you didn't care about them then why should I care about you?"

"If you take me to this Volag Nok, then you're no better than I am!" she stuttered out.

He snorted.

"Oh please, you'd have a nice warm cell there with a bed and a toilet and three meals a day. You wouldn't be plastered to the wall in a web cocoon with an enormous bite wound on your neck and venom coursing through your veins while you waited to become an arachnid's dinner. So don't even compare what you did to what I want to do to you. Compared to what Rain and Jenny went through, your time there would be a walk in the park."

"My father and mother wouldn't let…"

She gasped when Alan seized her by her dress and put his face inches from hers.

"Yeah, where is mummy and daddy?" he snarled. "Because I do wanna talk to them. I wanna tell them what you did and show them the bite marks on my family member's necks and I want them to explain to me why they didn't do anything to stop you! So, you tell me how to contact them and I'll gladly talk to them myself!"

Kida swallowed hard.

"Please don't tell them," she said.

"What? Now you don't want them involved? A moment ago you were telling me that your parents wouldn't let me take you to Volag Nok and now you don't want them to hear what you did? They really don't know what you've been doing, is that it? Then maybe we should talk to them and enlighten them on your little activities."

"No! Don't tell them! I promise I'll stop!"

Brother.

Alan paused when he heard his brother's voice in his head.

Yes, Te'lesau?

I've done it. I've gotten the majority of them at least. I'm looking around and I don't see any more big spiders and I've gotten the queen. She's just a teeny tiny arachnid now. They can't hurt anyone anymore.

Alan chuckled.

"What?" Kida said.

"My brother just contacted me telepathically. Your spider army is finished. They're a bunch of teeny tiny spiders now, including the queen. So now you have no muscle to back you up, it's only you!"

She gasped when he jerked her closer to his face.

"Where's the secret entrance into the castle so my brother can come inside?" he snarled.

"I'll…I'll show you!"

She gasped when he shoved her towards the door.

"And don't try anything because you'll regret it if you do," he said coldly.

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After Kida led him to the door, Alan called to his brother both mentally and vocally, leading him to it. He smiled when he finally reached the doorway.

"Good work, my brother," Alan said to him.

"Yes, you too. Although…"

He stared down at his underwear.

"Must have been quite an interesting time up in the bedroom."

Alan glanced down at his Y-fronts.

"Oooops, forgot I was nearly starkers," he said. "But no, we did nothing. I wouldn't shag this brat for all the money in the universe, not when I have my angelic Rose waiting for me in the TARDIS."

"Good because I'm sure Rose would have something to say about you having sex with another woman," he said.

He stared at Kida who was looking at the two of them in shock.

"Yes, we're twins which is why it was so easy to switch my brother for me while I took care of your pets," the Doctor said smugly. "And thanks to Alan, I had enough time to miniaturize them all, including their queen."

He whipped out the screwdriver and pointed it at her.

"Care to join them?" he said. "I'm sure all the tiny spiders would like a tiny princess to look after them and feed them insects!"

"No, please!" Kida said. "I told your brother I wouldn't bother anyone anymore. Just please leave. Take your family and go."

"She doesn't want us informing her parents of the naughty things she did," Alan said to him.

"Really? And what if I didn't? Would you take that as a signal to go back to doing what you've been doing, killing and hurting people like my wife and daughter?"

"No! I swear I won't hurt anyone! I've learned my lesson, honestly! I'm sorry I did that to you, really I am! Just please go! Don't take me to Volag Nok!"

The Doctor cocked his head to one side and then gave his brother an amused grin.

"Threatened to take her to Volag Nok, did ya?"

"Yup!"

He snickered.

"That's a pretty good idea actually. I think a few hundred years in a metal cell deep beneath the ice and snow will sort her out nicely."

"No!" he said as they giggled. "Really! I promise I won't do anything else! Please just give me another chance!"

The brothers stared at her.

"What d'ya think, Te'lesau?" Alan said. "Shall we let it slide and give the little brat another chance?"

"Weeeeell, maybe we can give her another chance since her spider army's been dispatched."

She gasped when the Doctor came up to her and stared at her with the same intense look that his brother had given her.

"But I'm warning you," he growled. "I will be back to check on you and if I hear you've harmed any more innocents then you better fly away as fast as you can because my brother and I will make your life a living hell! YOU GOT THAT?"

She flinched and nodded her head rapidly. Her eyes bugged out when he rapidly switched gears and gave her a cheerful smile.

"Cheers, thanks for that. Now, I think once my brother gets his kit back on we'll be off."

His face hardened.

"Remember…I'll be watching," he said in a low voice.

She nodded her head rapidly. He instantly brightened as he patted his brother on the shoulder.

"You know, Antillies Minor sounds heavenly. I think Rain and Jenny would love the tropical beach. I say we go back there for a little well deserved rest."

"No arguments from me."

Kida gasped when Alan rounded and ran back to her.

"But just because we're on the beach getting some sun and having fun, don't think you can start up with the killing again because my brother and I have ways of seeing if you're naughty and nice…just like Father Christmas!"

He spun back around and walked back to his brother. Kida stared at them both, stunned, as they quickly hurried up to the bedroom to retrieve his clothes.

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"Aaaaah! This is just brilliant!" the Doctor sighed as he lay with his wife on a blanket on the white sands of Antillies Minor.

She was cuddled up close to him in her bathing suit, lying with her head on his bare chest while he had his arm around her. Beside him, Jenny stretched out on another blanket sunbathing. She looked at him.

"Yeah, why didn't we come here instead of going to the planet of evil princesses and spiders?" she asked him.

"I told you I didn't know they had enormous spiders there nor was I aware there was a bratty, murderous princess. Despite all that, you have to admit the crystal caves were spectacular, right?"

"Yeah, they were, until the spiders attacked us," Rain said.

The Doctor feigned exasperation.

"You just have to nitpick every place we go to, doncha?" he said to her.

He smiled when she giggled and kissed the top of her head. He raised his head up and watched his brother and sisters laughing and splashing in the surf before sighing contentedly and lowering his head back to the blanket.

"Dad?"

He glanced at Jenny.

"Hmmm?"

"You really think she's gonna behave now?"

"She better if she knows what's good for her."

"So you really are going to go back and check on her, love?"

"Oooooh, I might pop in once just to show her I mean business," he said. "And I might go back when her parents are at home and accidentally let it slip that their daughter tried to kill you both. You know me; I just can't keep my gob shut."

They laughed and he smiled when Rain scooted up until her head was next to his.

"I love you so much, Theta."

"And I love you too, Latara, with all my hearts."

He glanced over when Jenny crawled over to him.

"What about me? Do you love me?"

He pretended to consider that while Jenny laughed and slapped his arm.

"I love you when you're not acting like a soldier," he said.

"Dad, I haven't acted like a soldier since Messaline."

"Well, I love ya then."

She shook her head when he chuckled and hugged him when he wrapped an arm around her.

"You both are my lives and I'm so glad you're here with me now," he said.

"Same here," Rain said while Jenny nodded.

They all closed their eyes enjoying one another's company. Suddenly, they all gasped when cold water hit their bodies. Their eyes snapped open and they saw Alan standing in front of them holding a yellow plastic sand pail in his hand.

"Ooops, I'm so sorry, I tripped on a shell and my water just splashed all over your bodies. I'm such a klutz sometimes."

"Get him!" the Doctor yelled.

Alan's eyes bulged and he took off across the sand while the Doctor and his family leapt up and gave chase, laughing hysterically with the rest of his family while they ran after him under the warm Antillies Minor sun.

THE END.