Anime Jeopardy

Here's the third game. Oh, and you know I only own Charles Tolle. Just a little refresher:

means someone is ringing in

() means a wrong answer (very common around here)

means a right answer (very rare in these parts)

means a Daily Double

(stage directions)

Hope you enjoy this game. You'll meet my second rival, who should appear later.

Episode 3

Charles- Welcome to episode 3 of Anime Jeopardy. If you do not want to watch the Double Jeopardy round because of the technical difficulties that have prevented the airing of the first round (we film live instead of taping), I quite understand. Of course, I also understand if you don't want to watch period. Don't count on the first round being aired later, that'll never happen. And finally, before we get to the game, I'd like to apologize to all people in the audience who are lactose intolerant and/or prone to epileptic seizures for what happened before we came on the air. A bit of happy news (I guess) is that we actually managed our way through the entire first round. Today's contestants are Sango, who is in second place with 17.

Sango- You and your freakin' Daily Double.

Charles- Hey, I'm not the one who guessed incorrectly and bet 83. In third place is the reason we finished the first round, because Jet Link, AKA 002 achieved a whopping -12 700 by ringing in whenever he could and incorrectly questioning every answer.

002- Joe told me to go hard or go home, so I'm playin' to win!

Charles- You'll be going home if you go any harder. And lastly in first place with 200 is C. T. Smith.

Smith- I suppose this is just a lucky day for me.

002- Bullshit, you're good at everything you do.

Charles- And you flat out suck. Now let's play. Here they are: THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID, IT'S BETWEEN A MAN'S LEGS, INFAMOUS WHITE RAPPERS, SCANDINAVIAN COUNTRIES THAT START WITH "D" AND RHYME WITH "ENMARK", FAMOUS AKIRA TORIYAMAS, and finally, MOVIES WITH MEN NAMED ALFRED. Okay, 002, select.

002- Famous Akira Toriyamas for 200.

Charles- I sincerely hope you don't answer this one. This man is the creator of DBZ. 002, do I really want to call on you?

002- Yes. Who is Eiichiro Oda?

Charles- No. Sango.

Sango- Who is Akira Toriyama?

Charles- At least one of you understands things. Pick a category.

Sango- I'll take Infamous White Rappers for 1 000.

Charles- He wrote Ice, Ice, Baby. …Anyone?... (sigh) 002.

002- Who is MC Serch?

Charles- You need to "Serch" for a new answer. Smith.

Smith- Who is Vanilla Ice?

Charles- Duh. Choose.

Smith- …Hmmm, they all look equally interesting. I honestly can not decide.

Charles- Sango, you choose.

Sango- Scandinavian Countries for 200.

Charles- The only country in the world that starts with "D" and rhymes with "Enmark". 002, must I call on you?

002- Yes. What is Dicelandenmark? ()

Charles- Doesn't exist. Anyone else? Smith? Sango? Time's up. It's Denmark, you screw-ups. You know, something tells me it would be best if I just pick your next question. It's Between a Man's Legs for 1 600. Other than the testicles, this is between a man's legs. Rrrrrgh, 002!

002- What is a nipple ring? ()

Charles- I'm going to kill someone. Sango.

Sango- What is a vagina? ()

Charles- Hell no! Time's up, people. It's a freakin' penis! Don't tell me you don't know a big difference between men and women, Sango!

Sango- I thought we all had vaginas.

Charles- Well, you're wrong. Don't you know how babies are made?

Sango- In a factory. The mom buys a pumpkin to put on her belly and it grows bigger, and after nine months, she gives it to the stork as collateral for the baby.

Charles- Okay, you are officially an idiot. Smith, have you decided on a category?

Smith- Yes, Scandinavia for 400.

Charles- Look at the map. The country on that map that is highlighted in red starts with "D" and rhymes with "Enmark". I'll ignore 002 and call on Smith.

002- Hey, I know the answer! What is Norway? ()

Charles- Do you hear yourself? Smith, what is it?

Smith- I honestly have no idea. ()

Charles- Sango, it's up to you.

Sango- What is Deïnschenmårk? ()

Charles- I know that doesn't exist. It's Denmark. You know, I think I'll just save us all some time and some sanity and skip right to Final Jeopardy. Because Smith is good at all he does, 002 hasn't correctly answered even once, and Sango is Sango, you will each pick and answer your own question. You'd have to be a complete failure to mess this up. 30 seconds, go screw yourselves. ( ) Time's up. I hope you did not mess this up, but who the hell am I kidding. 002, you wrote "How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop" and responded "Who is William Shakespeare?" I seriously do not know what's more appalling, your answer, or the fact that you just wagered and lost 3 900 points to finish with -20 000.

002- Well, I swear that's what 004 told me.

Charles- Did you ever consider that maybe he was wrong?

002- He happens to be dumber than I am.

Charles- First of all, I don't know how that's possible, seeing as you're the dumbest person we've ever had in the 3 episodes that we've had so far, and if 004 is dumber, why did you trust him? Sango, you wrote nothing because?

Sango- The pen was too heavy and I can't read or write, anyway.

Charles- The crap I have to go thorough here.

Sango- ACDM has just as much crap.

Charles- That's crap that I like. Well, your illiteracy prevents you from wagering, leaving you at -1 783, so Smith, you're now our only hope. You wrote "What is the world's best manga?" and responded "What is Zombie Powder?" It's One Piece, so that'll cost you… everything. You win with nothing. Get out of here. Bye-bye to Sango and 002. (pulls lever. Blades fall and cut 002 and Sango in half) Stick around for ACDM on next.

Figure out who my next rival is? If not, wait around. He'll appear in disguise in another game. Hope you enjoyed this!