"After all," he boomed, "what is Christmas without…Santa Claus?!!" He let out a deep, hearty laugh. "It's a Christmas not worth having!" He laughed again.

"But Santa…" Tankini pleaded, "why? Why do all this?"

"Why? Because it's all too commercial! Christmas I mean. It used to be all about the love. But now? Presents! Money! Material things! That's all they care about. And it sickens me!"

Tank interjected, "what the hell! You've been delivering presents for years! It didn't seem to bother you then!"

"It's only gotten worse. Every year more and more expensive gifts…it's too much! I may only work once a year but it is the WORST DAY EVER! It ends tonight…when everyone on this planet is a zombie they'll be under my control. No more greed. Everyone will be equal. And now, please…accept my resignation…KILL THEM!"

The Deadites surged forwards again, arms swinging wildly at the team. Niko and Tank took front line and beat back the first few waves. "Scott think!" Tankini shook him by the shoulders, what did you do last time?"

"I…I…I don't know! Something to do with the book! There may have been some words but…"

"Which words?"

"I don't know! It's a book, it's full of them! All we can do is get it off him!"

Tankini turned to the other two and back. "We'll hold them off, get the Book now!" Scott fought through the army, cutting a path towards the large red sleigh Santa stood atop.

Father Christmas stood with arched legs, one hand on the book and the other outstretched, dark energy pouring from the Necronomicon through him. He was oblivious to Scott flying through the air and batting him over the head. "My, my. That was naughty of you."

Scott crashed upside down into a wall and fell to the ground. His friends were fighting valiantly but their defeat was inevitable. They fell to their knees exhausted and looked up at who was previously thought to be the kindest man alive. "Don't worry children, death ain't so bad. Just ask my army." He chuckled darkly.

"Hey jolly fat man!"

"Huh?" Santa turned. Atop the stack of presents Scott had found the perfect gift. "No, don't touch that!"

Scott levelled the RPG at him, "I've got a present for you!"

Santa stopped his zombie horde, "I'll spare your friends just…put that down!"

Scott considered, "there's only one way to say it…Merry Fucking Christmas!"

"NOOOOO!" The projectile forced itself from the launcher flying dead-on towards Santa. It impacted and exploded right in his stomach, blowing him outwards in many wet pieces.

Santa's remnants splattered down as Scott approached the scorched book. He picked it up and gasped, "delicious cake!"

The undead creatures throughout Russia crumbled into dust as Scott tore massive mouthfuls out of the Necronomicon. His vampire-like teeth shredded the main body of it before dropping it and stamping on the remains. "Bye bye Senator!"

As Niko helped himself to Santa's armoury, Tank and Tankini discussed Scott's fate…